Worst GTA safehouse

[atay26]

Not sure if this has been done but what do you think was the worst or what did you dislike the most?

Edited October 2 by atay26

[Algonquin Assassin]

Every single one of the purchasable safehouses in San Andreas.

If there’s ever been an exhibition of indulgence of quantity over quality than that would be it.

 

The Johnson house is fine, but the run of the mill safehouses that have the same 3-4 interiors copied and pasted interiors all over the map are sh*t.

 

[wise_man]

12 minutes ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

Every single one of the purchasable safehouses in San Andreas.

If there’s ever been an exhibition of indulgence of quantity over quality than that would be it.

 

The Johnson house is fine, but the run of the mill safehouses that have the same 3-4 interiors copied and pasted interiors all over the map are sh*t.

 

Especially the hotels.

As a kid, I was disappointed after buying them. I thought buying the pyramid hotel would allow me to explore the entire hotel.

[Krooked_]

The GTA III safehouses were kind of lame, especially the ones in Staunton Island and Shoreside Vale. The Portland one at least had an interior you can check out from outside but the other two are just elevators you walk into. I understand that, at the time, enterable buildings were probably not that high on their priority list if at all but having fully explorable safehouses would've been nice.

Edited October 2 by Krooked_

[billiejoearmstrong8]

Brian's disgusting derelict house that Johnny is left with in TLAD, 100%

 

- It's a revolting cockroach infested sh*thole (literally has a toilet full of sh*t in it)

- Annoying to access/navigate (have to go round to the back door, through several rooms, turn around to go up the stairs and through more rooms to save)

- In a horrible location (right down in the bottom left of the map in an industrial area far from anything good/useful and far from bridges and tunnels to other islands, and on a road where you often have to wait a while to find a taxi)

- Has not one but two radios blasting unpleasantly loud death metal at all times
- Not only is it the only safehouse you're left with, it doesn't have a TV so the option of watching the in-game TV is entirely removed

 

Most unpleasant and depressing safehouse ever!

Edited October 2 by billiejoearmstrong8

[Telephone]

This one.

 

 

Why would Tommy purchase a burned shack on the rooftop of a building in Downtown is beyond me.

[atay26]

40 minutes ago, Telephone said:

This one.

 

 

Why would Tommy purchase a burned shack on the rooftop of a building in Downtown is beyond me.

Worst part is you need to purchase it for 100% completion 

[The Tracker]

If we talk about safehouses the protagonist start with, Luis's Apartment in TBoGT definitely is the worst contender for me, its design just looks and feel uncomfortable with how small and crowded all the furniture is, and how of a hassle little things such as saving and changing clothes is like, as everything is so close to each other, add to that's that it is in a bedroom that literally is right next to the living room without even a door or a wall to make up for it, why even have a bedroom at that point? it just doesn't feel like home at all, it just feels like a place Luis rented temporarily to get away from his mother and have a roof before he eventually moves downtown as he earns a higher position in the nightclubs, but that isn't the case, you're stuck with it for the rest of the game, Luis can save Tony's ass a trillion times, get rid of his debts, affiliate with an Arab billonaire, become the #1 cage fighter in Liberty City, earn millions in drug trafficking, get access to military grade weaponary and vehicles, yet no matter what, he still lives in the same sh*tty ass apartment. 

[billiejoearmstrong8]

57 minutes ago, The Tracker said:

If we talk about safehouses the protagonist start with, Luis's Apartment in TBoGT definitely is the worst contender for me, its design just looks and feel uncomfortable with how small and crowded all the furniture is, and how of a hassle little things such as saving and changing clothes is like, as everything is so close to each other, add to that's that it is in a bedroom that literally is right next to the living room without even a door or a wall to make up for it, why even have a bedroom at that point? it just doesn't feel like home at all, it just feels like a place Luis rented temporarily to get away from his mother and have a roof before he eventually moves downtown as he earns a higher position in the nightclubs, but that isn't the case, you're stuck with it for the rest of the game, Luis can save Tony's ass a trillion times, get rid of his debts, affiliate with an Arab billonaire, become the #1 cage fighter in Liberty City, earn millions in drug trafficking, get access to military grade weaponary and vehicles, yet no matter what, he still lives in the same sh*tty ass apartment. 

Yeah I don't get why it has to be THAT small, it's very boring. And he should've ended up with Yusuf's apartment or Tony's apartment, or a similarly cool one.

 

1 hour ago, Telephone said:

This one.

 

 

 

Why would Tommy purchase a burned shack on the rooftop of a building in Downtown is beyond me.

I have a fondness for the Skumole Shack. Convenient when doing the biker missions or if you sneak to the second island early, a bargain at $1000, an SMG pickup under the stairs, a good place for a stand off with police, and just amusingly random to have a shack there lol. And a good name.

Edited October 2 by billiejoearmstrong8

[JetNormalGuy]

4 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

Every single one of the purchasable safehouses in San Andreas.

If there’s ever been an exhibition of indulgence of quantity over quality than that would be it.

 

The Johnson house is fine, but the run of the mill safehouses that have the same 3-4 interiors copied and pasted interiors all over the map are sh*t.

 

I'd say they do their job of giving the player extra garage space and more varied saving points so they're definetly not useless, San Andreas is a big place and having safehouses in the small towns and in the different districts of the cities is helpful.

[sabitsuki]

8 hours ago, billiejoearmstrong8 said:

Most unpleasant and depressing safehouse ever

Well based on the tone of the whole game it sure as hell ain't the Ritz Carlton.

[Algonquin Assassin]

7 hours ago, JetNormalGuy said:

I'd say they do their job of giving the player extra garage space and more varied saving points so they're definetly not useless, San Andreas is a big place and having safehouses in the small towns and in the different districts of the cities is helpful.

 

Yeah, but that wasn't my point.

 

It's more to do with their interiors if anything. There's nothing to do in them besides changing clothes and save and like I said they get repetitive really quick. Then again I don't think there needed to be so many. It's not like San Andreas' map is so enormous it needed safehouses all over the place to be justified.

 

A couple of safehouse in each city would've been enough. It's stupid for example how you have the San Fierro garage and just down the road there's an apartment you can buy so you have two save points within walking of eachother when there didn't need to be. It's just poor layout planning and design IMO.  I'm fine with having options, but the safehouses in San Andreas mostly feel like an excuse to have something to spend money on.

 

I would've preferred less, but higher quality with extra garage space to boot than a heap of sh*tty apartments/houses I'll go in once and never again.  

Edited October 3 by Algonquin Assassin

[PhilPerlmutter]

12 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

If there’s ever been an exhibition of indulgence of quantity over quality than that would be it.

I get where you are coming from, but my guess is that R* was very limited as they were releasing the game for PS2 initially.

Location wise, they are actually very practical (noticed mainly by people like me who save after step basically).

 

I absolutely dislike the safehouse in 3 in shoreside vales, not useful at all.

[Comrade Monke]

7 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

 

Yeah, but that wasn't my point.

 

It's more to do with their interiors if anything. There's nothing to do in them besides changing clothes and save and like I said they get repetitive really quick. Then again I don't think there needed to be so many. It's not like San Andreas' map is so enormous it needed safehouses all over the place to be justified.

 

A couple of safehouse in each city would've been enough. It's stupid for example how you have the San Fierro garage and just down the road there's an apartment you can buy so you have two save points within walking of eachother when there didn't need to be. It's just poor layout planning and design IMO.  I'm fine with having options, but the safehouses in San Andreas mostly feel like an excuse to have something to spend money on.

 

I would've preferred less, but higher quality with extra garage space to boot than a heap of sh*tty apartments/houses I'll go in once and never again.  

Seriously that's one of the things I hate about SA. The safehouses were there just to spend your money on because assets basically vanished other than the RC shop, Wang cars and the airstrip.

[AkshayKumar]

I don't like Madd Doggs safehouse. It feels haunted the way it's so big yet nobody else is there apart from some breathing sounds. Also saving there disables the gym and basketball minigames. The other Mulholland safehouse is best Mullholland safehouse. 

[Pistol Bobcat]

^ Good answer, the Mulholland safehouse is simply better and I wish they kept the Beta version look for it.

 

Brian's safehouse for starters, as others pointed out, depressing dank sh*thole blasting one of my least favourite stations, no TV and down in the industrial wasteland of southern Alderney. Wish TLAD had a better ending where Johnny and the boys simply join the Broker chapter's clubhouse, fantastic game but but what a downer ending! The one nice thing I can say is that it'll be useful for storing the Skylift if I get around to stealing it on PS3.

 

I'd normally mention for the Skumole Shack but that's at least extremely useful when you're doing a starter save.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited October 3 by Pistol Bobcat

[Algonquin Assassin]

2 hours ago, AkshayKumar said:

I don't like Madd Doggs safehouse. It feels haunted the way it's so big yet nobody else is there apart from some breathing sounds. Also saving there disables the gym and basketball minigames. The other Mulholland safehouse is best Mullholland safehouse. 

Vercetti Estate > Madd Dogg’s crib.

 

BTW I’ve been meaning to ask, but why did you change your favourite GTA to San Andreas?

 

How can the founder of LLC sell his soul to the devil? You should be ashamed, drawn and quartered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*fart*

 

Scuse me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[cant remember]

For me it would be the shack on the roof in VC.

For mandatory "main" safehouses I suppose the ones for Johny Klebitz, they're dirty and should be condemned.

[Comrade Monke]

For me probably the GTA 3 safehouses. You can't even enter them.

2 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

Vercetti Estate > Madd Dogg’s crib.

Yeah I always see people complaining about the Vercetti Estate but I think it's pretty detailed

[cant remember]

59 minutes ago, cant remember said:

For me it would be the shack on the roof in VC.

For mandatory "main" safehouses I suppose the ones for Johny Klebitz, they're dirty and should be condemned.

 

I answered here where I would least likely want to reside lore-wise. I suppose functionality-wise most of the GTA5 safehouses because I found no reason to go to any of them.

[Comrade Monke]

8 minutes ago, cant remember said:

 

I answered here where I would least likely want to reside lore-wise. I suppose functionality-wise most of the GTA5 safehouses because I found no reason to go to any of them.

I mean you can get drunk and smoke weed in those safehouses 

[AkshayKumar]

3 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

BTW I’ve been meaning to ask, but why did you change your favourite GTA to San Andreas?

 

How can the founder of LLC sell his soul to the devil? You should be ashamed, drawn and quartered

Vice City and San Andreas are and will likely be my top two GTAs for a long time. I just had a burst of nostalgia for San Andreas so decided to switch it for a bit, but I'm a Vice boy at heart so won't be for long

 

3 hours ago, Algonquin Assassin said:

quartered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*fart*

 

Scuse me.

I legit waited for a bit thinking some gif would load before your virtual fart

[Comrade Monke]

5 minutes ago, AkshayKumar said:

Vice City and San Andreas are and will likely be my top two GTAs for a long time. I just had a burst of nostalgia for San Andreas so decided to switch it for a bit, but I'm a Vice boy at heart so won't be for long

 

I legit waited for a bit thinking some gif would load before your virtual fart

Bruh even after the fart I thought a gif wasn't loading 

[The Artist]

Alderney safehouse in IV - just a boring one room shack in a boring area. The whole of Alderney was so dull and boring.

[H-G]

Worst GTA safehouses? I'd say all of them from VC. Now I have nothing against this game... It's great, really, but there are some things that I need to point out:

 

You have eight safehouses, but only two of them (Ocean View Hotel and Skumole Shack) actually have an interior and thus you are forced to save OUTSIDE the rest of them, and only four of the eight (Ocean Heights Apartment, Links View Apartment, El Swanko Casa and Hyman Condo) actually have garages to store vehicles in.

 

Then you have ten assets as alternative save points, but only two of them (Vercetti Estate and Sunshine Autos) have garages to store vehicles in and a whole five of them (Boatyard, The Pole Position Club, InterGlobal Studios, Print Works and Malibu Club) force you to save outside the actual establishment despite having proper interiors inside them. In fact, the interior for the Print Works is not even accessible and is greatly unfinished with several missing textures.

 

Not to mention you can't even save at one of the assets (Phil's Place) which let alone doesn't even generate any income and in turn requires you to spend in order to use the services it provides, lol.

 

...

 

And then there are the safehouses in SA, both those that are acquired throughout the storyline and those that can be bought:

 

The most annoying part of the most of them is that they either don't have a garage to store vehicles in, or they don't have a wardrobe for changing CJ's clothes... And sometimes, they don't even have both of the said facilities!

 

Like, if you want to change clothes after "The Green Sabre" you're gonna have to spend $20,000 on this safehouse in Angel Pine, that also lacks a garage for stashing cars, just to use it's damn wardrobe... Or alternatively take the pain of traveling all the way back to Los Santos if you're crazy enough (and have the crazy-assed road map figured out). Not to mention, the same needs to be done time and time again in each city as you earn more of such places to save.

 

Another thing I wanted to talk about are places like Mike Toreno's Ranch, The Four Dragons Casino and Madd Dogg's Mansion. These three places clearly have garages (and the casino one even behaves like a proper garage!), but yolo, you just can't use them whatsoever! The garage at Toreno's ranch is basically a barn with no doors and the ones in Madd Dogg's place are simply modeled onto the mansion like a wall, they don't even have an interior, let alone they would open at all.

 

Also, The Four Dragons Casino has CJ, a well-known stakeholder of the said casino and personal friend of the casino owner, save his progress OUTSIDE the said establishment when R* could've given him a nice apartment inside the casino given how it's a hotel too.

 

Other than that, while most safehouses do have interiors, they are heavily repetitive and there are even some of them that are there in the game but never even used at all.

 

Special mention to the Verdant Meadows airstrip that has a big-ass hangar as a garage but can only store up to FOUR vehicles regardless of their sizes. Like WTF dude, a spot like that should be able to handle dozens of cars, mang SMH...

 

...

 

GTA3's safehouses are fine. Except that I wish the Staunton Island ones wasn't just an elevator and that the Shoreside Vale safehouse, despite having one big garage with three doors that can host up to three vehicles, had all of it's three doors opening up when approaching to enable easier stashing of vehicles. That's it.

 

...

 

And generally speaking, while I'm mostly fine with safehouses in GTA games where the player has to save outside due to no interior, any safehouses which do that despite having a proper interior and the safehouses that have no garages (and\or wardrobes in SA's case) are really dumb IMO...

Edited October 6 by H-G

[The Tracker]

58 minutes ago, The Artist said:

Alderney safehouse in IV - just a boring one room shack in a boring area. The whole of Alderney was so dull and boring.

I actually liked the Alderney safehouse, it was the only apartment in IV that gave me a cozy vibe. 

[BadaBing_1996]

On 10/2/2022 at 8:11 AM, wise_man said:

Especially the hotels.

As a kid, I was disappointed after buying them. I thought buying the pyramid hotel would allow me to explore the entire hotel.

I agree. Good thing there's a guy working on overhauling all of Las Venturas's hotel interiors. @Rocky24pl

 

 

 

 

[ChubbyB0b]

I never liked South Bohan Safehouse in GTA IV. Especially once you complete Bohan missions, I found it tedious. I always used Taxi to get there.

[MrBreak16]

6 hours ago, H-G said:

Worst GTA safehouses? I'd say all of them from VC. Now I have nothing against this game... It's great, really, but there are some things that I need to point out:

 

You have eight safehouses, but only two of them (Ocean View Hotel and Skumole Shack) actually have an interior and thus you are forced to save OUTSIDE them, and only four of them (Ocean Heights Apartment, Links View Apartment, El Swanko Casa and Hyman Condo) actually have garages to store vehicles in.

 

Then you have ten assets as alternative save points, but only one of them (Vercetti Estate) has a garage to store vehicles in and a whole five of them (Boatyard, The Pole Position Club, InterGlobal Studios, Print Works and Malibu Club) force you to save outside the actual establishment despite having proper interiors inside them. In fact, the interior for the Print Works is not even accessible and is greatly unfinished with several missing textures (citation needed).

 

Not to mention you can't even save at one of the assets (Phil's Place) which let alone doesn't even generate any income and in turn requires you to spend in order to use the services it provides, lol.

 

...

 

And then there are the safehouses in SA, both those that are acquired throughout the storyline and those that can be bought:

 

The most annoying part of the most of them is that they either don't have a garage to store vehicles in, or they don't have a wardrobe for changing CJ's clothes... And sometimes, they don't even have both of the said facilities!

 

Like, if you want to change clothes after "The Green Sabre" you're gonna have to spend $20,000 on this safehouse in Angel Pine, that also lacks a garage for stashing cars, just to use it's damn wardrobe... Or alternatively take the pain of traveling all the way back to Los Santos if you're crazy enough (and have the road map figured out). Not to mention, the same needs to be done time and time again in each city as you earn more of such places to save.

 

Another thing I wanted to talk about are places like Mike Toreno's Ranch, The Four Dragons Casino and Madd Dogg's Mansion. These three places clearly have garages (and the casino one even behaves like a proper garage!), but yolo, you just can't use them whatsoever! The garage at Toreno's ranch is basically a barn with no doors and the ones in Madd Dogg's place are simply modeled onto the mansion like a wall, they don't even have an interior, let alone they would open at all.

 

Also, The Four Dragons Casino has CJ, a well-known stakeholder of the said casino and personal friend of the casino owner, save his progress OUTSIDE the said establishment when R* could've given him a nice apartment inside the casino given how it's a hotel too.

 

Other than that, while most safehouses do have interiors, they are heavily repetitive and there are even some of them that are there in the game but never even used at all.

 

Special mention to the Verdant Meadows airstrip that has a big-ass hangar as a garage but can only store up to FOUR vehicles regardless of their sizes. Like WTF dude, a spot like that should be able to handle dozens of cars, mang SMH...

 

...

 

GTA3's safehouses are fine. Except that I wish the Staunton Island ones wasn't just an elevator and that the Shoreside Vale safehouse, despite having one big garage with three doors that can host up to three vehicles, had all of it's three doors opening up when approaching to enable easier stashing of vehicles. That's it.

 

...

 

And generally speaking, while I'm mostly fine with safehouses in GTA games where the player has to save outside due to no interior, any safehouses which do that despite having a proper interior and the safehouses that have no garages (and\or wardrobes in SA's case) are really dumb IMO...

Pretty sure the Vercetti Estate counts as a safehouse. Also Phil’s place isn’t an asset, it’s pretty much a gun shop for heavy weapons. Otherwise, what you said is on point.

[Lioshenka]

Franklin's house. Unclear why he kept it, terrible floor plan, too far from the city centre, too far from roads to countryside.

 

Then pretty much all of GTA 4 save houses, especially the Algonquin ones. Very depressing locations, even compared to the others.

 

Favourite ones:

- By far - GTA 3 Portland house. Small, practical, cosy. Why can't I buy one in real life?

- SA's Airstrip tower and Flint County farmhouse for good picturesque settings and convenient locations

 

I loved that in SA you could save almost at every corner, and you would never be too far from where you need to be. Different houses allowed you to take on different personas or different jobs depending on how you feel. Was fairly disappointed with the repeating interiors though. Loved the little houses with unique interiors.

Edited October 3 by Lioshenka