Stardust101 Posted January 6, 2021 Share Posted January 6, 2021 Body Count Body Count is my first ever published project, and you can play it right now on the DYOM website. Story In 1994, notorious criminal Thomas Benson is caught and sentenced to death. However, LSPD Chief of Police Wilbert Jones learns about Benson's shooting abilities and uses him to rid Los Santos of all gangs and criminal organizations. Things You Should Know As I said, this is my first ever published project. It's very short, because I couldn't wait to publish it. Nonetheless, I learned various things during it's development, and I'll use them to create better MPs in the future. Fun Fact The protagonist, Thomas Benson, is based off Manhunt's protagonist James Earl Cash. Both are death row inmates that have a chance on freedom. Feedback Is Important! I'm always looking to create better missions that the community enjoys, so I highly suggest you leave comments on the DYOM page telling me what I did right and what I should improve in the future. Have a nice day! Thunder0515, zakarum5835 and joz 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thunder0515 Posted January 7, 2021 Share Posted January 7, 2021 (edited) Heya! I see that you posted an MP. Can you please edit it, so it has the link to the website? Thanks! Here's the link for everyone who visited this: https://dyom.gtagames.nl/show/67834 v I'll review it shortly in an another post. v Edited January 7, 2021 by Thunder0515 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thunder0515 Posted January 7, 2021 Share Posted January 7, 2021 First mission: Length: Short Difficulty: Easy Variety: Good Mistakes: Minor Suggestions: The radio can be made as a first person by using the severed cop arm and putting a radio in the hand. Also, add a car. Second mission: Length: Short-Medium Difficulty: Just right Variety: Good Mistakes: A cop ped appears in the Vagos house and then dissapears. Suggestions: Add a car. Third mission: Length: Short Difficulty: Very easy Variety: Decent Mistakes: Small variety in the Aztecas guns. Suggestions: Add more aztecas and vary their guns. Fourth mission: Length: Very short Difficulty: Easy Variety: Small Mistakes: Small variety in SWAT guns, the mission is extremely short. Yagonov is a second name, not a first name. SWAT guys are operatives. Suggestions: Make the mission longer. The ending should be at the parking lot. Add some objects as cover and decoration. Fifth mission: Length: Short Difficulty: Extremely easy Variety: Small Mistakes: Too much health and armour pickups, small cop variety in guns, player has 200 health. Suggestions: Add a car. Remove all the health pickups, you will not need 3 health pickups if you have 200 health. Sixth mission: Length: Short-Medium Difficulty: Needlessly difficult, but still easy Variety: Decent Mistakes: The car doesn't even block the road, just go around it. Suggestions: Instead of the car, add a fence that you can't avoid. You'll have to shoot the keypad in order to pass, and that's when you get attacked. Replace the damn molotov cocktails with something like Tec-9s or AKs. Seventh mission: Length: Way too short Difficulty: Easy Variety: Decent Mistakes: The crazy soldier is only crazy due to what he says. That's actually brave of him, as he distracted you and even tried to drive you over. Why should you destroy the truck? Code Reds are used for hazing of the military men. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_service_response_codes for codes. Suggestions: Expand the mission, make so that you break in by climbing over or whatever. Eighth mission: Length: Very short Difficulty: Just right Variety: Decent Mistakes: FBI guys are agents. Army guys are men. Wilbert has headshots on. Ending: wat Suggestions: Make it longer and make the build up better. Overall: Plot: Decent, but good enough for a first mission. Length: Extremely short for 8 missions. The average length is about 90 seconds for each mission. Difficulty: It gets steamrolled quickly. Variety: Decent, I guess. Mistakes: There are grammar mistakes, but I can understand that from someone not native to english. They're minor, though. Never saw a major grammar mistake.Keep up the good work! Aymunz 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stardust101 Posted January 7, 2021 Author Share Posted January 7, 2021 Thanks for the feedback Thunder0515! I never shared any project on the web, so I'm glad people are being nice! I'm also pretty aware that Body Count was short. I wanted to see people react to my project, so I kinda rushed it. I'm currently working on my next mission pack. I feel like it's already more challenging and has more variety than Body Count. I'm on vacation so I did a lot of progress already. By your review, you were probably expecting a Body Count update. I like the story of Body Count so much that I might remake it entirely! But we'll see it in the future. Have a nice day! Thunder0515 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joz Posted January 8, 2021 Share Posted January 8, 2021 Going to play this later, it's always good to see a new MP out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aymunz Posted February 2, 2021 Share Posted February 2, 2021 (edited) sorry if my reviews are messy. It's been a while since I written a review. it's a good first MP as you seem to have grasped the basics of dyom. -mostly short, easy mission with straight objectives. "Go and kill". -I like how the later missions had a more varied enemy types. I definately enjoyed figuering out how to survive that groove street hell pit after a couple tries. -the story is very lightweight, with just enough info to give gameplay. the dialogue was mmostly weak, but i think i admired that "living a criminal life is more exciting, wilbert!", very cheeky, since there wasn't much of dialogue throughout, the mp was easy to follow. -the final mission was overall anti-climactic. I like that there were different levels with different "units", but despite them being different , they all felt the same, the variety in units that the previous missions had? it was very missed out here. also they were all equally easy. the fbi level had this fbi agent who is standing onto a machine and has a clear shot on you, that was a great idea ,but ineffective as he didn't have enough aim. wilbert's health was also low and just shooting him like that with no effort.. could use some creativity here too. btw I like the cover art you did for it. Max Payne with the face of T Bone xD. It's actually quite convincing! Edited February 2, 2021 by Aymunz RithRake24 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stardust101 Posted February 2, 2021 Author Share Posted February 2, 2021 27 minutes ago, Aymunz said: sorry if my reviews are messy. It's been a while since I written a review. it's a good first MP as you seem to have grasped the basics of dyom. -mostly short, easy mission with straight objectives. "Go and kill". -I like how the later missions had a more varied enemy types. I definately enjoyed figuering out how to survive that groove street hell pit after a couple tries. -the story is very lightweight, with just enough info to give gameplay. the dialogue was mmostly weak, but i think i admired that "living a criminal life is more exciting, wilbert!", very cheeky, since there wasn't much of dialogue throughout, the mp was easy to follow. -the final mission was overall anti-climactic. I like that there were different levels with different "units", but despite them being different , they all felt the same, the variety in units that the previous missions had? it was very missed out here. also they were all equally easy. the fbi level had this fbi agent who is standing onto a machine and has a clear shot on you, that was a great idea ,but ineffective as he didn't have enough aim. wilbert's health was also low and just shooting him like that with no effort.. could use some creativity here too. btw I like the cover art you did for it. Max Payne with the face of T Bone xD. It's actually quite convincing! Thanks for the review Aymunz! I know Body Count is far from good, but it was a nice way to introduce me to the DYOM community. Still waiting for your review for The Angel Pine Massacre! Aymunz 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...