Indiana Jones and Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (rewritten)

[Bratva Assassin]

Based on a 2008 film of the same name.

 

It was 1957 in Nevada. Two Russian Mafia soldiers named Antonin Dovchenko and Boris Yelko

were driving stolen Army vehicles. They and the fellow mobsters accompanying them were all in

US Army disguises. A group of teenagers were racing them in a car while listening to Hound Dog

by Elvis Presley. Luckily for them, they turned the other way before the mobsters approached an Army base.

 

“Sorry gentlemen. This whole area is closed for weapons testing for the next twenty-

four hours. That includes all on-base personnel” said an American army soldier named James Wycroft.

 

“Good afternoon sir,” said Antonin.

 

“I’m afraid that goes for you too, Colonel sir” said James Wycroft.

 

Antonin, Boris, and the other mobsters all stepped out and opened fire on James as well as the other military personnel guarding the gates. The vehicles entered the base.

 

One of the trunks opened, letting out a British MI6 agent named George McHale and Indiana Jones. George had his hands up while the brave Indiana Jones was seemingly unphased even though the duo was surrounded with rifles pointed right at them.

 

“Put your hands down, you’re embarrassing us” said Indiana Jones.

 

George did so then Antonin pointed at Hangar 51 while saying “You recognize that building, yes?”

 

Indiana Jones looked back and found the dead military personnel having their bodies dragged by a group of enforcers under the names of Butler, Marshall, and Koehler.

 

Indiana Jones then looked at Antonin and said “Drop dead.”

 

Antonin whacked Indiana Jones across the face.

 

“I’m sorry. I meant drop dead comrade” said Indiana Jones.

 

Antonin told two other Russian Mafia soldiers under the names of Chase and Fillmore to restrain Indiana Jones in his native language. They did as they were told while Boris stopped George from helping Indy. Antonin slowly clenched his fist, rolled up his sleeve, arched his arm back a little ways, and was getting ready to strike Indiana Jones right in the face.

 

Just then, he was stopped by a female Russian Mafia capo who stood at about five foot nine, weighed about 143 lbs, was blue eyed, and had dark brown hair in a bob cut.

 

“Where were this professor and the British government agent found?” she asked.

 

“In Mexico” answered Antonin.

 

“You’re not from around here, are you?” said Indiana Jones.

 

“Where would you think I’d be from?” she asked.

 

“Well, the way you sink your teeth into those wubble u’s, I would say Kazan, Russia” answered Indiana Jones.
 

“Smart man. My name is Irina Spalko. I work for Joseph Valirover, head of the Valirover crime family. I am highly trusted by Joe and his underboss” said the woman.

 

“And why?” asked Indiana Jones.
 

“Because I know things and what I do not know, I find out. What I need is in here” answered Irina.

 

She cuffed her hand and held it to Indiana Jones’s forehead Star Wars style. After a few seconds, she let her hand down and said “You’re a hard man to read, Dr. Jones.”

 

She patted him on the cheek a couple of times. “Ouch” said Indiana Jones sarcastically.

 

“So we will do this, what is it, the old fashioned way. You will tell us. You will help us find what we seek” said Irina.

 

Indiana Jones, George, and all of the Russian mobsters went into Hangar 51 as the doors opened.

 

“This is the warehouse where you and your government hide all of your hidden secrets, yes?” said Irina.

 

“This is a military warehouse. I haven’t been here before in my life” said Indiana Jones.

 

“Object we seek, rectangular box container. Contents of the box, mummified remains” said Irina.

 

“What makes you think I have any idea what box you’re talking about?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“Because ten years ago, you were part of the team that examined it,” answered Irina.
 

“Look, even if I knew what you were talking about…” said Indiana Jones.

 

“You will help us find it” interrupted Irina.

 

After looking around for a few minutes, Indiana Jones said “Compass, I need a compass. You know, like north, south, east, and west. No compass?” with George and all of the Russian mobsters in dead silence.
 

After Indiana Jones helped them locate the crate using gunpowder and shotgun shells, all of the Russian mobsters had their guns pointed at Indiana Jones and George while they had their guns pointed at them.
 

“Drop the weapons or your capo, Irina Spalko is dead” said Indiana Jones.

 

George then pointed his gun at Indiana Jones and went to the Valirover crime family’s side.

 

“Sorry mate but I’m a capitalist and organized crime syndicates pay well,” said George.
 

“After all we’ve been through? Really? I thought we were friends, George” said Indiana Jones.

 

“Any last words of defiance, Dr. Jones?” asked Irina.

 

Just then, a helicopter and sirens were heard. An FBI agent by the name of Richard Taylor shouted “This is the FBI! You are under arrest! Come out with your hands behind your head!”

 

“It’s the feds! We need to get out of here! You have lucked out, Dr. Jones” said Irina.

 

The crate was loaded onto one military vehicle. Indiana Jones climbed on top of boxes and reached high elevation as George and all Russian mobsters were getting in military vehicles and escaping.

 

George was in one with Irina, who told him “Faster! We need to lose the heat!”

 

Once Indy reached the floor, all of the mobsters and George were gone and he slowly walked outside. He was put in handcuffs by agents Richard Taylor and Paul Smith.

 

Richard and Paul were then accompanying Indiana Jones at an FBI building in Connecticut. They greeted Robert Ross as he came to them.
 

“Relax guys, I can vouch for Dr. Jones.”

 

“What the heck is going on?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“I heard about a US military base in Nevada being attacked by the Russian Mafia. Describe the woman you saw” said Robert.
 

“Tall, thin, about thirty-two years old, carried a sword of some kind, I think a rapier,” said Indiana Jones.

 

Robert, Richard, and Paul showed Indy a file of her and he said “Yeah, that’s her.”

 

“Irina Spalko, she sure left an impression on Joe Valirover and his underboss, Vladimir Kazliv. Now, George McHale has teamed up with Irina. They’ll surely be happy about that. They got away from our agents” said Robert.

 

“How are we so certain Indy isn’t hiding something from us and secretly associated with them?” asked Paul.

 

“He and George were clearly held hostage after a failed espionage attempt. Dr. Jones, let’s just say that you’re of interest to the Bureau. Great interest” said Robert. 

 

Indiana Jones was then seen teaching a college history class. The dean of Marshall College named Charles Stanforth came into the classroom, saying “I hate to interrupt but I have important news.”

 

“The lecture will continue when I get back,” said Indiana Jones.

 

As he and Charles left the classroom, he asked Charles “What is it?”

 

“The FBI showed up this morning. They ransacked your office and searched all your files” said Charles.
 

“You’re the dean of the college. Why didn’t you at least attempt to stop them? They have no right” said Indiana Jones.

 

“They have every right. They weren’t vandals or thieves. They were federal agents with search warrants. The university isn’t gonna get itself embroiled in that kind of controversy. Not in this politically charged Cold War climate” said Charles.

 

“So you’re firing me?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“A leave of absence is all. An indefinite leave of absence” answered Charles.

 

“You ARE firing me” said Indiana Jones.

 

“During which they’ve agreed to pay your full salary for a period…” said Charles.

 

“I don’t want their money!” interjected Indiana Jones.

 

“Please don’t be foolish. You don’t want what I had to go through in order to get that for you” explained Charles.

 

“What exactly did you have to go through, Charlie?” asked Indiana Jones.
 

“Henry, I resigned,” answered Charles.

 

“Where will you go?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“Overseas to London to start. I might end up teaching in Leipzig. Heinrich owes me a favor. I’ll wire you when I get everything settled” answered Charles. 

 

As Indiana Jones left the Marshall College campus, he came across a nineteen-year-old rocker riding on a motorcycle.

 

“Hey old man, are you Dr. Jones?” asked the rocker.

 

“Yeah. What’s it to you, kid?” said Indiana Jones.

 

“Are you a friend of Dr. Oxley?” asked the rocker.
 

“Harold Oxley? The archaeologist? Yeah. What about him? I haven’t talked to him in twenty years” said Indiana Jones.

 

The rocker took Indiana Jones to Archie’s Diner where they sat down and began talking with each other. The rocker told Indy that someone was trying to Harold Oxley and he got a message from his mother that he was down in Peru.
 

“What’s your name?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“Mutt. Mutt Williams” answered the rocker.

 

“Mutt? What kind of name is that?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“It’s the name I picked. You got a problem with it?” said Mutt.

 

“Take it easy. What was your relationship with Oxley?” asked Indiana Jones.

 

“My dad died in the war. Oxley kind of helped my mom raise me” answered Mutt.

 

“The Ox and I were obsessed with an item called the crystal skull in college” answered Indiana Jones.
 

“How do you know about it?” asked Mutt.

 

“Are you kidding? It’s all he ever talked about. He’d talk about it until the cows come home” answered Indiana Jones.
 

“What is it? Is it like an idol?” asked Mutt.

 

“Deity carving. Mesoamerican. He said this was real and he was off to a place called Akator with it” answered Indiana Jones.
 

“What’s Akator?” asked Mutt.

 

“It’s a mythical lost city in the Amazon. The conquistadors from Spain called it El Dorado. Supposedly, the Ugha tribe were chosen by the gods 7,000 years ago to build a giant city out of solid gold. It had aqueducts, paved roads, and technology that wouldn’t be seen again for over 5,000 years. Francisco de Orellana disappeared into the Amazon looking for it in 1546. The legend says that a crystal skull was taken from Akator in the 15th or 16th century and that whoever returns the skull to the city temple will be given control over its power” answered Indiana Jones.
 

“What’s the power?” asked Mutt.

 

“I don’t know, kid. It’s just a story” answered Indiana Jones.

 

“No. From this letter, my mom thought the Ox was off his rocker so she goes down there, trying to find him only he’d already been kidnapped. Now, she said you’d help me” said Mutt.

 

“Me? What’s your mom’s name?” asked Indy.

 

“Mary. Mary Williams. Do you remember her?” asked Mutt.

 

“There were a lot of Mary’s, kid” said Indiana Jones.

 

“Shut up! That’s my mother you’re talking about. She said that if anyone could find the skull, it’s you” said Mutt. “I’m a tenure professor of archeology,” said Indy.
 

“Oh, so you’re a teacher. That’ll be a big help. What are we waiting for? Let’s go!” said Mutt.

He then got up and was about to walk out of the diner with Indiana Jones. Just then, two Valirover crime family enforcers named Dimitri and Bogdan stopped them. “

 

”Are you two here for milkshakes?” asked Mutt.

 

“Come quietly, Dr. Jones and bring the letter with you,” said Dimitri.
 

“From me? Do I look like a mailman to you?” said Mutt.

 

“We don’t ask again. Come now or we’ll…” said Bogdan.

 

Mutt pulled a switchblade out on them and said “Or what?”

 

“Nice try, kid, but I think you just brought a knife to a gunfight” said Indy as Dimitri and Bogdan pulled out pistols.

 

Mutt punched Dimitri across the face then the whole diner was pandemonium. Dimitri and Bogdan fired a few shots as Indy hopped on the back of Mutt’s motorcycle.

 

“Get on gramps” said Mutt.
 

“Go, go, go!” shouted Indy as Mutt took off with Dimitri and Bogdan on their tail.

 

Both the motorcycle and the mobsters’ car went right past a bunch of college students holding up signs and chanting “Better dead than red!”

 

Mutt took a left turn, causing Dimitri and Bogdan to crash into a statue of Marcus Brody. Mutt rode right through Marshall College.

 

“Move!” shouted Indy as a bunch of college students were jumping out of the way in order to avoid getting run over.

 

“You’re going too fast” said Indiana Jones.

 

“That’s a matter of opinion” said Mutt.

 

The motorcycle stopped for a split second as a college student asked “Excuse me, Dr. Jones. I just had a question on Hargrove’s normative culture model.”

 

“Forget Hargrove. Read Vere Gordon Childe on diffusionism. He spent most of his life in the field. If you want a good archaeologist, you gotta get out of the library” said Indiana Jones.

 

Indiana Jones and Mutt were then at Indy’s house. Indy pulled out a picture of Francisco de Orellana. Mutt asked who it was and Indy explained it to him.

 

“And just as I thought, koihoma,” said Indiana Jones.

 

“What’s that?” asked Mutt.
 

“It’s an ancient South American language. Pre-Columbian syllabic base” answered Indiana Jones.

 

“You speak it?” asked Mutt.
 

“Nobody speaks it. It hasn’t been heard aloud in 3,000 years” answered Indiana Jones.

 

“Ya know? For an old man, you’re not that bad of a fighter. I can see it in you” said Mutt.
 

“Thanks a lot,” said Indiana Jones.

 

“What are you? Like 80?” said Mutt.

 

“It’s a riddle. Leave it to Ox to write a riddle in a dead language” said Indiana Jones.

 

Later, Indiana Jones and Mutt were on an airplane to Nazca, Peru. They were walking through a Peruvian village.

 

“So what do you do for a living?” asked Indiana Jones.
 

“I play lead guitar in a garage band called Real Gone Cats” answered Mutt.

 

“You plan on doing that forever?” asked Indiana Jones.
 

“Maybe I do, teach. You got a problem with that?” said Mutt.

 

“No. Not if that’s what you love doing. Don’t let anybody tell you any different” said Indiana Jones.

 

As the duo headed towards a hulking sanitarium at the end of the street, someone wearing a fedora arose in the foreground. Somebody was watching them. It was Indy’s old friend, George.

 

Indiana Jones and Mutt were guided by a Peruvian nun who was speaking Spanish.
 

“What the heck is she saying? I mean, I took Spanish in high school but could never understand a word of it” said Mutt.

 

“Just be quiet and let me translate for you,” said Indy with an semi-agitated smile at the end.

 

Eventually, they were led to a room and the nun unlocked the door. Indy was telling Mutt what she was telling them along the way.

 

Indy read on the wall “Follow the lines only the lines can read that leads to Orellana’s cradle.” He then said “Cradle? Makes no sense. Orellana wasn’t from Peru. He was from Spain. He was a conquistador who came here looking for gold.”

 

“What happened to him?” asked Mutt.
 

“He disappeared along with six others. Their bodies were never found” answered Indy.

 

Another door was unlocked by the nun. Indy and Mutt were staring at a bunch of crystal skull drawings all over the walls.

 

“The lady wasn’t lying. Oxley really was obsessed” said Indy.

 

“Ox, what happened to you?” said Mutt as he hung his head. Indy looked at Mutt, realizing the emotion on his face and connection that Mutt had with Oxley. He looked away, embarrassed. He looked back at the drawings, studying them.

 

The backs of the heads were elongated. He talked about it with Mutt then read “Return” from Spanish to English. “But where?” Indy said on his own. He goes back down to his notes, studying the lines from the letter that he transcribed. Indy looked down at the floor. He noticed something, dropped to his knees and ran his fingertips across the floor. He found a groove there, something scratched in the floor. He traced along the line, and found two more. Somebody must have carved lines into the soft stone floor!

 

Indy had a flashlight with him and crawled into a narrow tunnel, only to find the floor moving. After he heard Mutt yelling for him, he crawled back out. “Looks like we’re gonna have to find another way,” said Indy.

 

Soon enough, it was getting very late at night when Indy and Mutt went to a cemetery. Indy grabbed two shovels and handed one to Mutt. Mutt read a sign aloud that said “Grave robbers will be shot.” Indy grinned and said “Good thing we’re not grave robbers.”

 

“But I thought you said Orellana vanished and nobody found his grave,” said Mutt.

 

“Looks like Harold Oxley did,” said Indy. All of the sudden, a bunch of Nazcas ambushed Indy and Mutt with arrows and blow darts. Indy knocked a bunch of them out with a shovel so they began retreating.

 

Mutt stared at Indy with a confused expression on his face and said “You’re a teacher?” “Part time,” said Indy. 

 

On their way to a cavern, a large scorpion stung Mutt. He screamed “Ouch!” and swatted it off.

 

“Are you okay?” asked Indy. “Uh. No. I got stung by a huge scorpion” answered Mutt. “That’s good. The bigger, the better” said Indy. “Are you serious?!” said Mutt. “If a small one stings you, don’t keep it to yourself” said Indy.

 

As the duo approached a tomb, they uncovered it. Indy told Mutt that it was the death mask of Orellana. As he took off the death mask, Mutt said “Looks like he died yesterday.” They then found the crystal skull. Indy explained to Mutt that Nazca infants would have their heads bound. “But why?” asked Mutt. “Honor of the gods” answered Indy. “No way. God’s head isn’t shaped like that, man” said Mutt. “Depends on who your god is,” said Indy.
 

On their way out of the open grave, they were surrounded by Russian mobsters with all of their guns pointed directly at them. “Hello Jonesey” said George, who was amongst them. “Hello George,” said Indy.

 

Next thing Indy knew, he was at a camp set up by the Russian Mafia in which there was a bonfire and a few tents. He was sitting down in a chair which he was strapped to. Antonin was watching over the tent then George came in, holding a bottle of whiskey in one hand and a cigar in the other.

 

“You’re lucky I turned up, Jonesey. Dovchenko wanted to blow your brains out. That’s three times I’ve saved your life, mate” said George. “Unshackle me right now and I’ll give you a big hug” said Indy. Just then, Irina came in and George beat it out of the tent past Irina and Antonin.
 

“How fortunate our failure to kill you, Dr. Jones. You survive to be of service to us once again” said Irina.

 

“You know me. Anything I can do to help” said Indy.

 

“With the power of the crystal skull, all the drug and weapon money will go through the Valirover crime family. When people think of the Russian Mafia, they’ll think of Joseph Valirover. It has always been his dream to go down in history as the only man that Nikita Khrushchev ever feared” said Irina.

 

“Now I know why Oxley returned it. He knows you’ve been after it” said Indy.
 

“We’re certain he’s been there,” said Irina.

 

Antonin was told to bring Harold Oxley in by Irina. He nodded then brought him in.

 

“Oxley! It’s me! Your friend, Indiana Jones! You’re faking it, right pal?” said Indy.

 

Harold couldn’t even look Indy in the eyes as he had gone very mad and was so out of sorts. He muttered unintelligibly.

 

“Listen, your name is Harold Oxley. You were born in Leeds, England. You and I went to college together at the University of Chicago. My name is Henry Jones Jr.” said Indy.

 

Harold Oxley walked away after staring off into space.
 

“What have you done to him?!” shouted Indy.

 

“We haven’t done a thing. It’s the crystal skull that has” said Irina.

 

She uncovered it and allowed some lamps to shine into it. Irina started her stopwatch. Indy was staring into the crystal skull as it was just too bright to not stare into. Irina circled around him. Eventually, Indy was so engrossed in it that he just couldn’t look away. Irina then ended her stopwatch and told Antonin to cover it. He did so with a blanket. Indy was then out of his trance. George then came in and set Indy free as he was told by Irina. Indy then snatched his hat out of George’s hand and put it on. As he was guided out, Mutt was brought out of a tent.

 

“You alright, kid?” asked Indy.

 

“Yes. Thank God” answered Mutt.

 

He pulled out a switchblade and shouted at Irina “Hey! I’m ready!”

 

That’s when she pulled out her sword and pointed it at Mutt. He stood back a little ways.

 

“Apparently, I have chosen the wrong pressure point. Perhaps I can find a more sensitive one” said Irina.

 

Boris Yelko and Antonin Dovchenko brought out Marion Ravenwood from another tent.

 

“Get your hands off of me you rotten Russkie thugs!” said Marion. 
 

She was thrown down then got up, dusted herself off, and looked Indy in the eyes. They said each other’s names.

 

“Mom!” said Mutt. He ran up to Marion and hugged her. “Mom?” said a confused Indy. “Sweetheart! What are you doing here?” asked Marion. “Forget that! I just wanted to know if you are alright” said Mutt. “Marion is your mother?” said Indy. “For goodness sake, Indy! It’s not that hard to figure out!” said Marion. “Yeah, I know. It’s just I never thought…” said Indy. “That I had a life after you left?” said Marion. “That’s not what I meant…” said Indy.

 

“So Dr. Jones, will you help us? A simple yes will do” interrupted Irina.
 

“Aw Marion, you just had to go and get yourself kidnapped” said Indy.

 

“Not like you did any better” said Marion.

 

Harold Oxley then began to recognize Indiana Jones and shouted “Henry Jones Junior!”

 

Indy was very excited that Harold finally remembered his name! The Valirover crime family members gave Indy and Harold paper to write on and a pencil to write with. Harold was drawing a lot of pictures at a table with Indy, George, Irina, Antonin, and Boris all looking over him and a few enforcers standing guard on each side. Indy and Irina then began studying a map together. 

 

Out of nowhere, Mutt punched an enforcer and overturned the table. It hit Irina and Antonin, knocking them over. Indy, Mutt, Harold, and Marion all began running away. On the way out, Mutt grabbed a lamp and threw it on the ground. It caused a fire, stopping Irina and the other Russian mobsters from coming through. As the foursome was running through the jungle, Indy shouted “What the heck where you thinking, kid?!”

 

“They were going to kill us” said Mutt.

 

“Well, maybe!” said Indy.

 

“Somebody had to do something!” said Mutt.
 

“Well, something ELSE would’ve been good!” said Indy.

 

“At least I’ve got a plan! Let’s go!” said Mutt.

 

Harold was looking over his shoulder, trying to watch the skull as he moves further from it, reaching out for it.

 

“Harold, for God’s sake, keep up!” said Indy.

 

Mutt turned sharply and led the other three down a narrow ravine, through a thick group of trees, and into a tiny clearing. They stood there, safe for a moment, trying not to make a sound as the Russian mobsters moved past them, deeper into the jungle. Mutt and Harold stood at the edge of the trees, peering through with Indy and Marion behind them. Indy and Marion each thought they were shrinking. As they looked down, they realized they were stuck in quicksand. As Indy was describing it, Marion said “Jones, for Pete’s sake, we’re not in school!”

 

“You’re right! Stay calm! Just keep your arms up!” said Indy.

 

As the two of them had their arms up, Mutt said “I’ll get something to pull you out” and dashed away.

 

“Harold, don’t just stand there. Go get help!” said Indy.

 

Without another word, Harold turned away as well. Indy and Marion were alone, up to their chests in quicksand. Marion then looked at Indy, feeling responsible.

 

“Indy, before we die, I just wanted to tell you that Mutt’s real name is Henry” said Marion.

 

“Good name!” said Indy.

 

“He’s your son” said Marion.

 

“My son?” said Indy.
 

“Yes. Henry Jones the third” answered Marion.

 

Mutt came back with an anaconda and told his parents to grab on. Marion got out first.

 

“Are you crazy?” said Indy.

 

“Just grab on, Indy!” said Marion.

 

“It’s a snake!” said Indy.
 

“It’s a rat snake” said Mutt.

 

“Rat snakes aren’t that big!” said Indy.

 

“Well, it’s not even poisonous! Now, just grab on!” said Mutt.

 

“Go get something else!” said Indy.
 

“Like what?!” said Mutt.

 

“Some rope or something!” said Indy.
 

“There’s no Sears, Kmart, or Target around here! Just grab on!” said Mutt.

 

“Maybe I can touch the bottom” said Indy.

 

“There is no bottom, just grab it!” said Marion.

 

“I think I can feel it with my feet” said Indy.

 

“Grab the snake!” said Mutt.

 

 “Stop calling it that!” said Indy.

 

“What the heck else do you want me to call it then? It’s a snake! Just grab it already!” said Mutt.

 

“Say grab the rope!” said Indy.

 

Marion and Mutt looked at each other then looked at Indy and said simultaneously “Grab the rope.” Indy was then let out of the quicksand and as soon as he got up and dusted himself off, he said “Get rid of that, son!” Mutt threw the snake away.

 

“You are one crazy old man” said Mutt. He laughed, shook his head, and said “Afraid of snakes.”

 

Harold came back, only with George, Irina, Antonin, and Boris. “Why do you wanna do everything the hard way, Jonesey?” said George. “Nice work, Ox. Thanks” said Indy sarcastically. “You said help” said Harold. 

 

Next thing Indy knew, it was broad daylight. He was in the back of a vehicle, hands tied behind his back, as were Mutt and Marion. Antonin was also in the back with him and was watching them, holding his rifle.
 

“Mutt, I just wanted to tell you that Colin Williams was your stepfather. Indiana Jones is your real father” said Marion.

 

“What?! You gotta be kidding me!” said Mutt. He was outraged and this was news to him.

 

“No sweetie. Colin and I started dating when you were three months old. He was a good man, but he wasn’t your father” said Marion.
 

“Wait a minute. Colin as in Colin Williams? You married him? I introduced you!” said Indy.

 

Antonin rolled his eyes. He didn’t know what they were talking about but he knew he was sick of hearing about it.

 

“You didn’t know that? Why didn’t you just try talking to me?” asked Marion.

 

“Because I never had an argument that I won” answered Indy.
 

“Ha! It’s not my fault if you can’t keep up!” said Marion.

 

“I didn’t want to hurt you” said Indy.
 

“Well, you failed. Didn’t you ever wonder why Ox stopped talking to you? He hated it that you ran away!” said Marion.

 

“Stop! Both of you!” said Mutt.
 

“Yeah, Marion. Let’s not make the kid have to see his mom and dad fight” said Indy.

 

“For the love of God, shut the heck up!” said Antonin.

 

“You’re not my dad!” said Mutt.
 

“You bet I am and I’ve got even more news for you! You’re gonna go back and finish school whether you want to or not!” said Indy.

 

Antonin has had it! He began swearing in Russian, threw his gun down on the floor, picked up a rag, and spun it into a tight line to use as a gag.

 

“Am I? What?! Whatever happened to the whole there’s not a thing wrong with it and don’t let anybody tell you any different speech? You don’t remember that?” said Mutt.

 

“That was before I knew I was your father!” said Indy.

 

“You’re NOT my father!” said Mutt.

 

“Oh yes he is!” said Marion.

 

Antonin then put the gag over Marion’s mouth. Indy kicked Antonin with both of his feet. Antonin fell against the side of the truck. He sat up straight and was in perfect striking range for Indy. Indy kicked him in the face. Mutt kicked him in the face too. Antonin fell on the floor, unconscious. Mutt grinned, found a way to his switchblade, and cut himself and both of his parents loose. Indy then ungagged Marion. Indy, Mutt, and Marion made their way to the front of the truck. Indy threw the driver out and took the wheel.

 

“We have to get Oxley back, get our hands on the skull, and get to Akator before they do” said Indy.

 

Just then, on a nearby jeep in front of them, Irina looked back with Boris driving, George sitting in shotgun, and Harold held hostage. She had the crystal skull in a bag and shouted that they were behind them.
 

“Who caused this?” asked Boris.

 

“Jones!” answered Irina. She shouted in her native tongue for two other Russian mobsters in their vehicles to ram him off the road. Marion and Mutt shrieked as they were being shot at with vehicles on each side of them. Indy stood up with his foot on the gas and used his bullwhip to whack open the glass windows of each vehicle. Both vehicles veered off into the distance. Irina then used a shotgun but Indy ducked as did Mutt and Marion. After firing it a few more times, it ran out of ammo and Irina angrily threw it overboard. Mutt then lept over to the jeep in front of them. Irina drew her sword as Mutt picked up the bag. Mutt began dodging the sword that Irina swung at him.

 

“Jonesey! This whole time, I’ve been working undercover in order to bust the Valirover crime family!” shouted George.
 

“Why didn’t you say so before?!” shouted Indy.

 

“What did you want me to do? Tape it to my back? It’s my job as a British spy!” shouted George.

 

That caught the ear of Irina. She held her sword to George’s throat and said “Any last words, infiltrator?”

 

Mutt attempted to save George but was kicked in the chest by Irina. As he was stumbling back, he was saved by a group of monkeys whom he went up in the treetops with. Indy, George, Marion, and Harold all looked up at him. Mutt spent a few minutes swinging with the monkeys until he was finally let down and a bunch of monkeys were all over Irina and Boris. Irina threw one over a cliff then Mutt, Harold, and George met up with Indy and Marion. The five of them jumped out of the vehicle and all closed their eyes as they jumped into the Amazon River with their eyes shut.

As they regained consciousness, Indy shouted all of his friends’ names. He was searching for them but couldn’t find them. He was all alone and thought they all may have drowned. He went down not one, not even two, but three waterfalls.

 

After the last one, his four friends pulled him over ashore. Mutt and George pushed his stomach in order to get all of the water out. Indy was breathing heavily. He got up and Harold held the bag with the skull in it. “He’s got the skull. Let’s move!” said George. Sure enough, Irina, Antonin, and Boris were right behind them.

 

As the four friends walked a little ways on land, they turned around and found the three Russian mobsters. They all had pistols pointed straight at them. Irina then found an ant crawl onto her hand and bite her. She shrieked then smashed it with her hand, clenching teeth. She removed her hand from the other as blood was all over it. Everyone there began to notice that there were ants everywhere to be seen. Irina grabbed onto a tree branch and moved upwards. Harold shined the light of the crystal skull to have the ants move in different directions. Boris was covered from head to toe in ants as Indy and Antonin got in a fist fight. Meanwhile, as an ant was crawling up Irina’s leg, she smashed it between her thighs. Harold tapped Indy on the shoulder as he ran up a hill with him, George, Mutt, and Marion. Antonin didn’t make it though and let out a blood curdling scream as he was being slowly eaten alive by ants, much like his fellow Boris.

 

Indy, George, Mutt, Marion, and Harold finally made it to the ancient temple of Akator. There were a bunch of skeletons surrounding them, only one was headless. Little did they know, they heard footsteps follow closely behind them. It was Irina!
 

“Harold! Quick! Put the skull on the skeleton!” said Indy.

 

“Not if I do it first!” said Irina as she snatched the skull from Harold.

 

Harold and Irina had a brief tug-of-war with the crystal skull until it finally slipped out of both of their hands and into the air. They both looked up and it landed atop the headless skeleton. The ground began to shake and fall apart as everyone except Irina left the area. Irina looked all around as she was stuck in the middle of a circle.

 

George fell behind and Indy let out his whip as George grabbed on. However, the wind was so strong that George kept slipping away.

 

“I’ll never forget you, Jonesey! Just remember, I died for a noble cause!” said George.

 

He let go and blew away in the wind.

 

Irina watched and said “I want to know” as all of the skeletons conjoined into one. It turned into an alien and stared deep into Irina’s eyes. The alien put a curse on Irina for attempting to steal the crystal skull! As part of her punishment, she screamed as her eye sockets lit afire. She then was quickly disintegrated into the air.

 

All of the sudden, the violence stopped. The alien gave gratitude towards Indy, Marion, Mutt, and Harold for their courageous deed. He teleported them all back to the United States!

 

Harold had to go back home to England but he didn’t leave without giving a special farewell to Indy, Marion, and Mutt.

 

Indy put his hand on Mutt’s shoulder and said “Hey, it’s been a great adventure! I couldn’t have done it without you or Marion!” Marion and Mutt then smiled at him.

 

“Yeah, it really has been a great adventure! A great father, mother, son, and friend adventure! I won’t be forgetting this any time soon” said Mutt. He did a group hug with both of his parents.

 

Later on, Mutt attended the wedding of Indy and Marion.

 

The end.