[MP] Old Friends Die Hard

[RithRake24]

@VikingEVM 4.5 pizzas? Damn, too much for my tiny tummy to handle. Gotta invite my family to share it. Nothing like Italian pizza!

[zakarum5835]

What does that mean ''stronzo'' and ''buongiorno''? Also, I'm waiting for the season 2.

[Aymunz]

I really enjoyed this mission pack!

The dialogue never stopped to grab my interest. Characters' interactions are entertaining. The characters themselves are fleshed out and well written. Although, theres still more yet to come.

I also like the consistency of the relationship between the crew and Gavin. Even though you show that Gavin have a more personal reason to destroy Zhan -a reason that the crew have even shown empathy to-  he still blackmails them and they are very careful not to be vulnerable to him. 

 

The build-up to the "mainframe mission" may feel a bit slow. But it's compromised by the immersive details throughout the missions. The ware house, the racing event (like DAMN, BRUH), and even the mainframe building are very well decorated with objects, actors, and cars, in addition to dialogue, all add up to a pleasing experience.

 

The gameplay is amazing, diverse and engaging. It was cool to land on the corporate building and crawling through the vent. The difficulty was meduim.

Waiting for the 2nd season to see how things will go. Zhan is still yet to be explored. and will the rest of the plans will work out.

Keep it coming!

Edited March 4, 2020 by Aymunz

[RithRake24]

@Aymunz Thanks a lot for the feedback, it means a lot to me! I'm really glad you enjoyed this chapter, and thanks for picking up on the dialogue. I put in a lot of effort for dialogue and characters for this MP since I was criticised for inconsistent characterisation and generic dialogue in my previous MP. It makes me really glad that the effort paid off.

 

The objects and effects were extremely difficult to design, but especially in the mainframe building since it was an enclosed space and it was hard to select and edit objects after they were placed since they were in close proximity of each other. The cutscene where Clark jumps into the office proved to be a challenge because I had to spawn the player above the ground for him to drop down correctly, and for that I needed to spawn an object, jump onto it (the ceiling was low and it took me ages to jump onto the object and walk to the middle, probably over 40 tries) and then delete the object (another headache, since there were objects all around which were being deleted instead of the right object, so I had to figure out the perfect position to stand in to delete the object; took me a lot of tries and lots of reloading saves to do this). So much effort for a single 3 second cutscene, but I'm happy with the way it turned out. The race scene also took a couple of days to design and finetune without crashes or lags but the result was satisfying in the end, and I'm extremely happy to have gotten the response that I got for it.

 

I hope you'll enjoy what's coming in Season 2. Thanks once again for playing and providing feedback!

[Aymunz]

9 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

@Aymunz Thanks a lot for the feedback, it means a lot to me! I'm really glad you enjoyed this chapter, and thanks for picking up on the dialogue. I put in a lot of effort for dialogue and characters for this MP since I was criticised for inconsistent characterisation and generic dialogue in my previous MP. It makes me really glad that the effort paid off.

 

The objects and effects were extremely difficult to design, but especially in the mainframe building since it was an enclosed space and it was hard to select and edit objects after they were placed since they were in close proximity of each other. The cutscene where Clark jumps into the office proved to be a challenge because I had to spawn the player above the ground for him to drop down correctly, and for that I needed to spawn an object, jump onto it (the ceiling was low and it took me ages to jump onto the object and walk to the middle, probably over 40 tries) and then delete the object (another headache, since there were objects all around which were being deleted instead of the right object, so I had to figure out the perfect position to stand in to delete the object; took me a lot of tries and lots of reloading saves to do this). So much effort for a single 3 second cutscene, but I'm happy with the way it turned out. The race scene also took a couple of days to design and finetune without crashes or lags but the result was satisfying in the end, and I'm extremely happy to have gotten the response that I got for it.

 

I hope you'll enjoy what's coming in Season 2. Thanks once again for playing and providing feedback!

Good to know that you improved lately. Though, I have yet to play your earlier MP (What Pain Means) when I have the time. 

I can relate to the difficulty in object placement. I'm glad that you pull it off eventually, and it delivered! Sometimes I have to delete all the surrounding objects just to get to the tiny little chair that I misplaced. Furstrating!

Regarding the racing scene, wow!  You put all these tables and chairs and actors and the race! Damn! It's this kind of attention to details that keeps this community alive and thriving! Thanks to @SIZZZ's add-on, the possibilities are endless!

Also, didn't mention that earlier, but I love the newspaper in the promotional section.

[RithRake24]

2 minutes ago, Aymunz said:

I love the newspaper in the promotional section.

Thanks a lot man! The idea of the newspaper was inspired from @Target13 with his approval but I did put my own personal touch and design to it  

[Aymunz]

9 minutes ago, RithRake24 said:

Thanks a lot man! The idea of the newspaper was inspired from @Target13 with his approval but I did put my own personal touch and design to it  

Amazing.

[Notna]

Alright then.

 

I don't want to be a broken record so I'll sum up the quick thoughts that mirror everything else you've already heard. The one thing that pops into my face in positive light is the incredible presentation - you've really seen an astonishing amount of effort to make sure cinematism is present in every cutscene. There were so many moments I thought that were so well positioned, angled, and not only that, creative - such as the CCTV portion in the first mission. Don't think I've seen that in DYOM. Altogether the cutscenes incorporate a lot of elements and techniques none of the rest of us have put to good use even if we knew how. Virtual salute.

 

The "season" label works really well in coalition and overall I very much feel like I'm watching some TV. Cutscenes here overpower gameplay but it's somewhat balanced anyway, and in case that didn't come across yet, I really like watching your cutscenes so it's alright. Gameplay itself is nothing mindblowingly unique, but there are some really cool portions that give me that warm fuzzy feeling. 

 

Spoiler

Big fan of the photography section for example. It's gradually simple but still something you don't see used much. I'm also a fan of all the skydiving and the set design in regards, but there's also some scrutiny of that - let's get to that later.

  

Story on it's own isn't the most unique but you have some good twists to it. Some good character work as well. I like how you brought pieces of your own culture into light with Rohit, and you've won a parrot badge by - I'm sure coincidentally - christening one of your characters with the greatest name known to man. 

 

Spoiler

Names an omen, because Clark in the other hand falls slightly into the "protagonist trap" - it's not easy writing the good guys, right? He's a troubled man with a troubled past but he's still the John Cena goody two shoes, and that makes him a little monotone. There's definitely an edge to him as said, so I'm hoping to see more of that in the next season.

 

In addition though you really were onto something with Miles as a delivery driver. The interaction with his boss was a little campy, but that made it better - I even had this vision of an alternate universe where Miles stays in that cover job of his and has these conversations with his boss. Could turn into a bunch of trouble, stolen shipments and altercations with rival trucking companies which Miles would of course settle the only way he knows how. Perhaps this could prove for a good setting to a prequel series? 

 

Miles' boss serves as the bridge to the central problems.

 

Spoiler

I won't dig too deep into the dialogue as I know the improvement you've made in that over the last months is ridiculously drastic, but I'll throw down a few examples that stood out to me and resolving them could prove vital to you in the future. For example, Miles' boss calling him Mr. Parker instantly made me think of our hero as driver in some sort of big bad black market fish stick WOLT service instead of the innocent delivery trucker that's closer to the truth. This is not really your fault but rather our minds getting used to the use of titles in speech on first meeting being associated to villains - "Mr. Bond, I've been expecting you" "Dr. Jones, time to die" and so on. Titles work better after a relationship between characters has been properly established, or a formal introduction has been presented. Also in this case, I don't see it working as the rest of their conversation seems to have Miles and his boss on friendly terms. I know DYOM comes with limitations but this is just food for thought.

 

Back when you had me test the third mission I already commented about how people like Rohit and Anton who've known each other for long should use more slang around each other so the dialogue wouldn't seem more stiff. I can see in the later missions you've paid more attention to that. Makes me happy.

 

And you knew this was coming.

 

Spoiler

Overall the dialogue here is an improvement, but I just cannot stress enough what an overexplaining does to a story. I've already used the expression of feeling like a child, so I'll offer you another one. I don't know if you have much of fall colors or leaves dropping in the land down under but I've beat you've heard of a rake (no pun intended) and what happens when you step on one? I feel like I'm stepping on one repeatedly. It just keeps coming back around, each time with a different curve and velocity but nonetheless it keeps breaking my nose a little bit more each time and shouting at me for the sixth time what I have to do in this mission.

 

I know you've worked on this a lot and it's one of the reasons I wanted to do the collab with you. You've made massive improvements but I can't stress this enough. Overexplaining has literally cost me screenwriting jobs half a decade ago and getting over it has made me into the writer I am. The less you explain unnecessarily and the more you let the player come around to on their own, the more it feels like a worthy experience. Then again it's very easy to compensate for that with underexplaining, which brings me back to feeling like a child - then the player has even more reason to just go "am I this stupid for not getting what's going on?". Balance is key, and you're headed in that direction. The latter half of this mission pack is better at that, but then there's just big segments that have me wishing I did have a rake to hit myself with.

 

Then to my area of expertise;

 

Spoiler

The legal stuff here is surprisingly accurate. Gavin Law's leverage against Miles/Clark is a believable threat and could very well pose a threat to him that could send him to death row. So Clark grabbing at the chance of securing his freedom was easy to buy and I like seeing that. You've also built his crew tightly and them coming back together for this last gig was well put. In fact, most everything was surprisingly believable - but then again, that's the fun part of doing these gangster missions. There's no bureaucracy to worry about, no legal obligations.

 

There's still realism though. I won't beat you with a pan for this but there's a couple of questions, which I wouldn't present unless you weren't interested in presenting everything accurately and realistically. This all is irrelevant otherwise but from the moment Clark gets on the roof of the Los Santos Tower. First of all, he appears in a SWAT unform - why? It worked to his advantage, but why a SWAT uniform? I'm not questioning it being the right call, but I'd have liked to see some sort of explanation. In addition, while this has little to do with the mission itself but maybe useful in the future, seeing a SWAT officer alone is a red flag - they generally operate in teams of six and rarely even in pairs.

 

Next, I understand this is GTA but Clark parachuting off the roof to the next building is next to impossible - I know guys who've spent their lives jumping out of airplanes and couldn't pull off a jump like the one Clark does, especially in a city setting. I'm not saying he couldn't do it, but again, why could he? Where did he learn to do something I wouldn't trust all Navy SEALs, the most amazing and dangerous men to ever life, to do? I want to know! 

 

Continuing on the same page, the girl's sniper shot (sorry, can't recall the name off the top of my head) from the roof to another is one hell of a shot. Once more, where did she learn that? I don't know if I could do it. Then again, intentional or not, it did bring a smile to my face that the guard didn't instantly kick the bucket. That brought a point back.

 

All in all I'm a huge fan of the presentation and the story's got potential with it's twists and hooks. Using your improved dialogue and sources for realism will bring it to a next level. A lot of this is already irrelevant because of how much you've improved between making this and now. Looking forward to season two. Keep it up man, and never hesitate to ask for aid with anything.

 

Spoiler

7.5/10

 

Edited April 16, 2020 by Notna

[RithRake24]

Thank you so so much for your detailed feedback! I am a filmmaking fanatic so I'm immensely glad you found the cinematics very cinematic indeed. Thanks for all the warm words you had to say about the project!

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

you've won a parrot badge by - I'm sure coincidentally - christening one of your characters with the greatest name known to man. 

Not a coincidence!  A reference, a tribute to you know who!

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

There's definitely an edge to him as said, so I'm hoping to see more of that in the next season.

I do indeed realise in hindsight that Clark's been portrayed as flawless. I did map flaws for him but none of the situations in Season 1 made me able to show them. I'll try to portray them next season to the best of my ability.

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

I can see in the later missions you've paid more attention to that. Makes me happy.

Indeed, I've used a lot of your advice, and advice from others, to improve my missions. I always treasure feedback from people like you and everyone else because it helps me improve in what I lack in. Especially since the whole 'dialogue' and 'characterisation' part is also applicable in IRL filmmaking and screenwriting. Thanks a lot for your constant help, I appreciate it a lot and surely do enjoy all my interactions with you on Discord.

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

 

And you knew this was coming.

Oh I did indeed. Remember when you told me you were going to play the season, and I told you there's one big mistake mid-season that I committed. It was this. Overexplaining. I fell into that trap yet again. I did try to fix it in the last episode though, and I'm definitely working on avoiding it in my future work.

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

The legal stuff here is surprisingly accurate.

Thanks! I should thank you for that though because I've learnt a lot of legal stuff from you. Even though most of my probing questions and doubts at you came after I designed OFDH Season 1, mostly for a certain behind-the-scenes project that I'm working on right now, you've still helped me a lot with this stuff.

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

First of all, he appears in a SWAT unform - why? It worked to his advantage, but why a SWAT uniform? I'm not questioning it being the right call, but I'd have liked to see some sort of explanation.

Like I told you later on Discord, it was the only proper skin with a face mask. And since Rohit explained that there's literally no way for Clark to get into the building without at least being captured on the edge of the footage, it is implied that he would want to cover his face. I didn't have space to mention this though due to the overexplaining cutscenes that came just before.  But yeah, you did understand what I meant when I told you on the chat.

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

I'm not saying he couldn't do it, but again, why could he?

 

On 4/16/2020 at 5:34 PM, Notna said:

the girl's sniper shot (sorry, can't recall the name off the top of my head) from the roof to another is one hell of a shot.

They've got history. That's all I'll say for now. There's a prequel being planned about them which should clear your doubts and explain their abilities. And besides, even though I tried to put in a lot of realism, this is still a fictional story made with a game mod, so maybe you should be prepared to suspend your belief for one or two scenes... After all, a harder stunt makes the gameplay more fun. Not everything is for the story or realism. The difficult jump was designed for a challenging bit of fun in the gameplay. Not sure if everyone found it fun, but that was the intention after all.  

 

Thanks again for your feedback, man. I look forward to hearing from you once the next Season is released. I'm happy with the rating you've given me but I'll try to improve further!

[Aymunz]

3 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

Not sure if everyone found it fun, but that was the intention after all.  

It was fun.

On 4/16/2020 at 10:34 AM, Notna said:

First of all, he appears in a SWAT unform - why? It worked to his advantage, but why a SWAT uniform? I'm not questioning it being the right call, but I'd have liked to see some sort of explanation. In addition, while this has little to do with the mission itself but maybe useful in the future, seeing a SWAT officer alone is a red flag - they generally operate in teams of six and rarely even in pairs.

 

3 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

I didn't have space to mention this though due to the overexplaining cutscenes that came just before.

Interesting discussion. I always wondered how much control do one has over his missions. Sometimes you have this perfect image of a mission, but limitations stand in the way of reaching it. 

Using the SWAT uniform for sneaky characters is very common.. It always bugs me to see this giant "SWAT" badge stuck in the back of this supposed thief/terrorist character that I'm controlling. But then it's DYOM. You could either do that or put a link to a skin mod so people can use it, and then how many will bother to download the mod?

 

The overexplaining is even harder to deal with. In film industry there are alot of elements at play; Actors' movements, facial expressions, and voice tone changes are elements that even some modern games can't nail right, let alone DYOM with it's looping, cartoony animations. As a result, you'll most likely rely heavily on dialogue to deliver the story. Which makes it more of a visual novel than a movie or a game.

 

That being said, how much explanation should one put in? Putting too much will make the mission feel stale, but putting too little will make it confusing. Also, how can one use other elements like level design, actor behaviours and object placement to add to the narrative besides simple dialogue? Eventually, you will end up sacraficing something to save your story.

 

But it's still very interesting to see people overcome these  limitations. I didn't expect to see such amazingly creative works when I joined this community. It's truly a blessing to be born in an era when a tool like DYOM exists. Maybe these same limitations can be a fuel to something even more creative! 

[RithRake24]

@Aymunz Those are very much fair points. I wonder, are you working on any DYOM project? Just a question.

[Aymunz]

11 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

@Aymunz Those are very much fair points. I wonder, are you working on any DYOM project? Just a question.

Yeah, i have some ideas in mind. One project that I planned to start making turned out to be very complicated. I'm not experienced with MPs. So I'll start with something simpler.

Edited April 19, 2020 by Aymunz

[RithRake24]

3 minutes ago, Aymunz said:

So I'll start with something simpler.

What format do you have in mind then? Single missions?

[Aymunz]

1 minute ago, RithRake24 said:

What format do you have in mind then? Single missions?

More like your MP "Carver For Hire". One central story and seperate missions. 

[RithRake24]

3 minutes ago, Aymunz said:

More like your MP "Carver For Hire". One central story and seperate missions. 

I see. Good luck on it and hope to see it soon.

[Aymunz]

2 minutes ago, RithRake24 said:

I see. Good luck on it and hope to see it soon.

Thanks. And good luck on your projects as well!

[Target13]

I promised you that once I was done with my mission-pack, I would play this. Well here we are!

I must note, I haven't played What Pain Means and thus surely must have missed some in-universe references. 

 

Review: Old friends die hard but very slowly too apparently (Season 1)

 

Old Friends Die Hard is the second entry in the RR24 Universe and follows Clark Jenson and his team of professional criminals who reluctantly perform one last job in hopes to clear their names and return to their previous lives without the fear of the authorities. The first five missions are cutscene-heavy and serve to familiarize the player with Clark, his partners and their objective. The real beefy part of the first season are the last two mission where their plans are executed. 

 

In terms of story, Old Friends makes it a point at most times to stay close to realism, with things like the professions the team members practice. Where as many DYOM stories have former criminals hide their identities by working as just another type of criminal (I'm a street racer, gun for hire, meth dealer, etc now), the old friends of Old Friends have realistic jobs such Delivery-truck driver and Computer programmer. Also noteworthy is their plan of attack, the team decided to go after Grief Industries' shipping sector in order to damage their reputation on an international level. This is a very realistic threat to Grief and would indeed harm the corporation far more than literally burning down Grief Tower, which is usually the go-to approach in action MPs. Although there were times that made me go hmmm. Such as a group of people trying to hide from the authorities, openly eliminating their enemies with grenades in a public parking-lot, but perhaps Law's abilities gave them enough confidence to do such public acts of violence. 

 

I have to say, at times it was a chore to sit through the dialogue. Especially in the beginning of the season, speech felt so unnatural and corny. Gavin Law's 'sophisticated and articulate businessman' shtick was so exaggerated that his dialogue was borderline irritating to read, however in the later missions, he spoke more like a real human being, especially when expressing his rage. Another thing that bothered me was that characters had to explain every little thing to a point where it was highly unnecessary, for example when computer expert Rohit mentioned a fact about Tech-workers working overnight, Gavin replied with 'I can confirm because I own a business myself'. The fact that Law owned his own corporation was already well established at that point and him pointing that out again was as if Donald Trump was to say something along the lines of 'I can confirm because I'm the President'. We already know you are. This is over-explanation and bickering about the difference between computers and peripherals made the first half of the season tedious and slow. Once the team arrived in Los Santos they picked up the pace however.

 

What I liked though in terms of dialogue was the diversity. Each member had their distinctive style of speech with Morgan being a little more soft spoken but snarky at times, Trent acting as the class clown and being source of comic-relief comparable to Roman from the Fast and Furious movies, Clark being rational, direct and confident and of course Rohit, for who it is easy to lose himself in the technical jargon and boring his teammates. The characters were at their best when they were expressing their personalities and obviously have chemistry with each other. The bro-hugs was a tiny wholesome detail that established their friendships.

 

Also I would to express my appreciation for the little bit of diversity in the team's cast. Last year, I created a controversial topic about diversity in DYOM which I believe gave some people the impression that I'm calling for a J.K Rolling level of inclusion and diversity, but Old Friends Die Hard captures the essence of what I was calling for. Morgan is a significant female member of the team without it being a point. I don't believe that her sex is mentioned even once. She is a sharpshooter, she is important, that's all there is to it. Diversity, not forced. I absolutely love the character of Rohit as well. Despite a good number of DYOM designers being Indian, I don't think we have ever seen a Hindi character before, at least not this prominently. I love the moments where he says the word 'friend' or says 'it's not a big deal' in his native tongue, these moments may not add much to story but are cool little bonuses for those familiar with Hindi. 

 

Very noteworthy are cutscenes. Of course there are moments where the focus is more on speech instead of the animation and camera-angle but there are times where the smooth/linear cutscenes are executed perfectly which gives a very cinematic feel. At times it felt 'comic-booky' with actions and locations being described in all caps and different colors. This isn't a bad thing mind you, not all actually as it gave the mission-pack are more unique style. A lot of attention is also paid to the environment. The race happening in the background in the second mission was very neat and cleverly designed as it took place simultaneously with Trent and Clark's conversation. Like I already noted over a year ago after playing the introduction mission, the use of objects, as well as the DYOM# objects, is perfect. Everything from pizza on the table to the whole roof of Grief Tower was placed perfectly and added much needed character to the bland San Andreas map.

 

While not being very significant this season, when there were bits of gameplay, they were special. Scoping out Grief Tower was unique and reminiscent of GTA V Heist Preps. The heist itself had me exclaim 'wow' several times. The way the roof of Grief Tower, the vent of Area 69 and the interior of the office building was used together to give an impression of Clark being inside one large building was clever and fun. The getaway was intense but unfortunately I had to restart the mission since the first time Trent's Sultan was swarmed by the enemy vehicles, making it impossible to get away. But little errors like these are minimal.

 

In conclusion: While Old Friends Die Hard suffers from pacing issues and sometimes tedious dialogue, its story benefits from an interesting cast of characters whose personalities and motivations are explored through clever designing tricks and fun gameplay segments. I wouldn't say Old Friends is quite there yet but its first season has laid a good foundation for a potentially intriguing story and should not be missed. Among Tony Starks, RithRake24 has proven himself to be a Peter Parker, who shows great potential and is more than capable of holding his own.

 

 

Spoiler

 

I thought it was cool how tall the Los Santos Tower stood in the distance when the mission directed me to drive there.

 

 

[RithRake24]

Damn... The T13 Seal of Approval? I'm lost for words. I never thought I'd get it. I'm really grateful for it and I'm really glad you were impressed by the missionpack! 

 

13 hours ago, Target13 said:

I must note, I haven't played What Pain Means and thus surely must have missed some in-universe references. 

I have to say, due to the 13-year gap between WPM and OFDH, the connections are limited. There's one major connection but I made it quite subtle, so even people who have played WPM didn't usually pick up on it until I told them myself. Reason why I made it subtle was because it wasn't important to the plot and I didn't want to force something not particularly important for this project onto players, like, 'Hey, look, in-universe connection! How cool! Check it out!' The connection was:

Spoiler

Ella, Clark's girlfriend, is actually the niece of Christopher Anderson, the protagonist of What Pain Means. Like I said above, the player isn't told this directly, but is given clues: Law tells Clark that is he completes the job, he could give up his fake identity and 'live with that Anderson girl', and Clark ever so briefly mentions 'her uncle Chris' in his conversation with Morgan at the Ammu-Nation.

 

13 hours ago, Target13 said:

I have to say, at times it was a chore to sit through the dialogue. Especially in the beginning of the season, speech felt so unnatural and corny. Gavin Law's 'sophisticated and articulate businessman' shtick was so exaggerated that his dialogue was borderline irritating to read, however in the later missions, he spoke more like a real human being, especially when expressing his rage. Another thing that bothered me was that characters had to explain every little thing to a point where it was highly unnecessary, for example when computer expert Rohit mentioned a fact about Tech-workers working overnight, Gavin replied with 'I can confirm because I own a business myself'. The fact that Law owned his own corporation was already well established at that point and him pointing that out again was as if Donald Trump was to say something along the lines of 'I can confirm because I'm the President'. We already know you are. This is over-explanation and bickering about the difference between computers and peripherals made the first half of the season tedious and slow. Once the team arrived in Los Santos they picked up the pace however.

Ah, this was an issue with the missionpack I identified myself, but only after I'd gone too far into the missionpack to be able to go back and fix. I realised that dialogue was too wordy at many points, but the worst part was their planning session at Grief's residence. The entire mission was basically lots and lots of exposition and overstretched and repeated dialogue. But I've been improving along the way and learning to pick up on things like that, also thanks to @Notna who's great with dialogue-related stuff. This could probably explain why you thought the dialogue improved towards the end of the season. The part about bickering about the difference between computers and peripherals however, was intended, because it's a part of Rohit's character. He doesn't like it when technical words are used wrongly. Maybe I took it too far...?

 

14 hours ago, Target13 said:

What I liked though in terms of dialogue was the diversity. Each member had their distinctive style of speech with Morgan being a little more soft spoken but snarky at times, Trent acting as the class clown and being source of comic-relief comparable to Roman from the Fast and Furious movies, Clark being rational, direct and confident and of course Rohit, for who it is easy to lose himself in the technical jargon and boring his teammates. The characters were at their best when they were expressing their personalities and obviously have chemistry with each other. The bro-hugs was a tiny wholesome detail that established their friendships.

I am IMMENSELY glad you picked up on this. This missionpack was a challenge I gave myself to create realistic characters who have unique qualities, instead of having boring guys who spoke the same way like robots. It was one of the most major issues of WPM Chapter 1. Play it and you'll see what I mean. Dialogues in WPM C1 were generic, tedious and boring as a whole, and characters were inconsistent, changing behaviours every mission. Despite feedback saying that the story was quite gripping, the characterisation ruined it. I'm extremely glad you were able to to pick up on and appreciate the unique character traits I gave the characters, and their chemistry together. It makes me really happy that the effort paid off.

 

14 hours ago, Target13 said:

While not being very significant this season, when there were bits of gameplay, they were special. Scoping out Grief Tower was unique and reminiscent of GTA V Heist Preps. The heist itself had me exclaim 'wow' several times. The way the roof of Grief Tower, the vent of Area 69 and the interior of the office building was used together to give an impression of Clark being inside one large building was clever and fun. The getaway was intense but unfortunately I had to restart the mission since the first time Trent's Sultan was swarmed by the enemy vehicles, making it impossible to get away. But little errors like these are minimal.

I wanted to end off the season in a memorable way. Lots of time and effort went into the heist (and the car race) that I designed, it was a pain to handle that many objects, especially in interiors.

Spoiler

The simple animations such as Clark jumping down into the room actually took a long time to create because of this. Too many objects, objectives and actors and effects in the same room.

 

14 hours ago, Target13 said:

Among Tony Starks, RithRake24 has proven himself to be a Peter Parker, who shows great potential and is more than capable of holding his own.

So, umm, I'm an Avenger now, Mr Stark?  

 

I've been very busy this year so far but I'm planning to make a comeback to designing with WPM Chapter 2 (already halfway done), which I hope will be a huge improvement from WPM Chapter 1. This will be followed by the second season of OFDH. Your review has motivated me to keep putting in effort to produce more projects . Thanks a lot for your review, and the seal!

 

P.S. About that screenshot, yeah it looks really cool from that angle! Kinda reminds me of the towering Citadel in Half-Life 2, I guess... Though obviously not nearly as ominous!

[Target13]

6 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

The part about bickering about the difference between computers and peripherals however, was intended, because it's a part of Rohit's character. He doesn't like it when technical words are used wrongly. Maybe I took it too far...?

Now thinking back, the computer/peripheral thing wasn't bad. It was just the example I could think of when writing the review.

I'm glad to have been able to motivate you. I really enjoy your work and am looking forward to playing more. 

 

I truly appreciate your efforts and the role you play in this community. Good luck with your upcoming projects.

[ZeroRaxo]

On 6/21/2020 at 6:16 PM, RithRake24 said:

There's one major connection but I made it quite subtle

It wasn't major puto

Spoiler

Ella Anderson is a minor character, and really, it's not that much of a connection

 

[RithRake24]

2 hours ago, Axoez said:

It wasn't major puto

  Reveal hidden contents

Ella Anderson is a minor character, and really, it's not that much of a connection

 

The connection was major in the sense that-

Spoiler

-you literally have the niece of the main protagonist of one MP as the girlfriend of the main protagonist of the other MP.

However, you could say the impact of this connection on the MP itself is rather minor.

[ZeroRaxo]

2 hours ago, RithRake24 said:

The connection was major in the sense that-

  Hide contents

-you literally have the niece of the main protagonist of one MP as the girlfriend of the main protagonist of the other MP.

However, you could say the impact of this connection on the MP itself is rather minor.

ok ok, but make wpm 2 and ofdh 2 soon blet