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MOTW #130


RithRake24

Who should win MOTW #130?  

4 members have voted

  1. 1. Vote for the best mission!

    • “Against The Emblem” by RyanAB
    • “Betrayal” by xXPinguXx
    • “Robin Hood” by 4nsmiley
      0
    • “Breakout” by omigawail
    • “Manipulation” by RithRake24
      0

This poll is closed to new votes

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  • Poll closed on 03/23/2019 at 08:00 PM

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zakarum5835
 

NEW UPDATE: Countdown to the deadline added, just click the link in the main topic. The timezone's set to my local time, but just look at the hours and minutes remaining.

lol i love the countdown xd

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My submission, literally 2 minutes before the deadline:

 

Manipulation

I guess the countdown is wrong then, it says there are 10 hours left (at least on my PC).

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I set the countdown as local time, so I think it shows how long it takes in different countries to reach the same date and time. So the countdown was set wrongly.

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JUST AN UPDATE

 

You guys could be aware of the very recent update GTAForums had, which now requires you to complete human verification when editing your main topic. Unfortunately, that update also brought about a bug in the website where the "Add a New Question" button doesn't work at all. Because of that, there will be no poll.

 

You guys will have to post your votes on the thread yourselves for this MOTW.

(And write reviews if you're feeling nice!)

 

Sorry for any inconvenience caused. Due to the official start of the voting time being delayed by 1.5 hours, I will extend the deadline too by the same amount of time.

 

Good luck to all the participants!

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All the missions look promising, I'll write reviews and vote as soon as possible.

 

P.S: Change the title of the thread to "MOTW #130: Voting" so more people check it out.

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All the missions look promising, I'll write reviews and vote as soon as possible.

 

P.S: Change the title of the thread to "MOTW #130: Voting" so more people check it out.

Thanks for your tip. I've lost count of the number of times you've helped me out now. Much appreciated, man.

 

Patiently anticipating your reviews now and your vote now.

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Killer_Queen_37

Sorry. Please proceed with the voting. I just got home from school, which has a very late dismissal time, and I don't think I can submit my mission in time. It was only 72% complete and I don't want the competition to be delayed any further. I do hope I can participate next time.

 

Good luck to everyone!

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Sorry. Please proceed with the voting. I just got home from school, which has a very late dismissal time, and I don't think I can submit my mission in time. It was only 72% complete and I don't want the competition to be delayed any further. I do hope I can participate next time.

 

Good luck to everyone!

Hopefully we'll see a mission made by you in the next MOTW. Maybe, if your mission idea somehow also fits the theme of the next MOTW, you can submit it then...

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Killer_Queen_37
 

Hopefully we'll see a mission made by you in the next MOTW. Maybe, if your mission idea somehow also fits the theme of the next MOTW, you can submit it then...

Thank you, but that's actually not allowed.

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Here are my thoughts on this weekly installment's missions:

 

Against The Emblem by RyanAB:

Spoiler

The mission is very confusing, it is almost impossible to find the key card. Next time, give hints or even put a market on the minimap so the player knows where to look. (Note for people who are still stuck: when facing the locked door, turn left and walk until you find a red shipping container. Stand exactly next to the door of this container and it will open with the key inside it*Courtesy of Rithrake*.)

 

The shootout part of the mission may be very difficult (Those combat shotgun NPCs are tough as sh*t), but the story is even more difficult to grasp because of the bad grammar. The player and his useless friend are chasing after some sort of emblem that is in the college of Fort Carson to return it to his friend's uncle, they are intercepted by some peasants (with military-grade weapons) who want the emblem for themselves, but they defeat them and go to his uncle but then he turns on them and kills them both... but why did he go with his friend if he wanted to take it anyways? How didn't he meet the peasants inside the building? Is there some symbolism behind the music played from the TV screen?

 

Overall, it sadly doesn't live up to it's potential and fails to make a compelling story or even make it up with fun gameplay. 4/10

 

Robin Hood by 4nSmiley:

Spoiler

It was fine I guess, the pacing was kind of all over the place. The checkpoints were far from each other while driving so it was hard to keep up with the dialogue. Also, why is the partner called "(?)" in the captions? And if the goal of the player was to not share the money why did he go with him in the first place? It would've been a lot easier if he just went solo.

 

The plan to do the heist looks easy, but that's definitely not how it would've worked out if the laws of physics, reason and logic were of any importance. How did he kill someone by shooting him in a building with dozens of people without anyone hearing anything? Did the prostitute next to him just stay in bed laying next to a dead body? How is wearing the clothes of a gangster supposed to help get a meeting with the boss of the brothel? And what the f*ck were the security guards doing, they let someone in without checking him for guns, they didn't even escort him to the boss themselves to insure he doesn't do anything stupid. And then don't react until the robber kills 2 people.

 

I don't know who exactly we fought in the ending. Is the crew friends of the partner we killed? How did they find out about his death and come for us? Also, the mission has a major bug in the end where the cutscene camera position did not go away so I had to fight the last wave of enemies from a static 2nd person view. I couldn't aim at all so I just ran them over with a car until they died but then the mission immediately ended with no closure. Average -albeit kinda fun- mission with no memorable moments. 5.5/10

 

Betrayal by Pingu:

Spoiler

Betrayal is a huge jump in quality from previous missions by PenguinBob (namely The Adventures of Claude Speed). Though of course there were some flaws and issues. The biggest turnoff for me is the repetitive skins. All enemies look the same, a little bit of variety in the models used would be great.

 

The placement of cutscenes was good, the story was captivating. The mysterious monk was... well.. mysterious. What was he doing on the roof of that building and how did he even get there lmao. How did he "kidnap" Johnny with the police there? None of the characters have clear motives there, Ricardo's betrayal for example was unexplained. Why did he have to kill his friend to "start doing business"?

 

It isn't perfect, but it's good enough to be a fun experience and a good time-waster for when you crave a simple gta sa mission. 8/10

 

Manipulation by RithRake:

Spoiler

This mission was not as innovative as Dirty Drug Deal unfortunately. I mean, it has its own identity and the twist was fun (though kinda expected cause the entire theme is about twists), but it definitely doesn't match the spectacularity of DDD. It wasn't fun, just like Betrayal by Pingu, all enemies use the same skin and use the same weapon. It was not challenging and the tight cover-less corridors of Area 51 are not made for shootouts.

 

Besides this, there is one plot hole that I could not bare. WHY, WHY did they not kill him when they finally had the chance? The entire time it seemed that they were fine with killing the scientist/doctor. He sends goons to kill him, and then shoots at him himself. Why in the end, after they got all that they needed from him, did they just let him live AND gave him access to a phone which he used to ruin their entire plan?

 

Also, it seems you have a thing for ending missions with countdowns leading to explosions. Some parts of the mission felt rushed, while others felt inexplicable which really reduced the rating of it. 7/10

note: what happened to the invisible volunteer...

 

The moment you've all been waiting for... (or just scrolled to, who likes walls of text anyways.)

my vote goes to Penguin Bob for his mission, Betrayal.

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zakarum5835

You should put the poll (i think) @RithRake24

EDIT: can you should remember i am a beginner creator? @omigawail

 

 

also, i will play all missions on tonight cuz i'm free from the school

Edited by RyanAB
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I use (?) Because I couldn’t think of a name. Last part was to add more gameplay but I probably should of explained how his group know about it. and the gang protect the brothel and the owner is push around by the gang but I don’t explain it. I thought player could use context clues with the gang members hanging out there. But maybe I should of explain a little. And yeah the guard should of being in the room or react to the first shoot instead of the second one. Thank you for the feedback @omigawail

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El Penguin Bobo

@omigawail Thank you for the feedback and thank you for the vote! I would have added some backstory, but I didn't want to exceed the objective limit...

 

I will be playing the missions when I get home and give some feedback.

 

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7 hours ago, Killer_Queen_37 said:

Thank you, but that's actually not allowed.

I remember Andrej saying somewhere that if you haven’t yet posted your mission you can use it for future MOTWs.

 

5 hours ago, RyanAB said:

You should put the poll (i think) @RithRake24

EDIT: can you should remember i am a beginner creator? @omigawail

 

  Hide contents

also, i will play all missions on tonight cuz i'm free from the school

I mentioned in the main topic that the new update of GTAForums means that the poll is not working. So I can’t use it.

 

@omigawail

 

First of all thank you so much for your review. It’s high quality and logical, like always.

 

If I wasn’t as busy as I was, I would have been able to to fix the plot hole and also have variety for the enemy actors. I did notice the plot hole but I didn’t get the time to properly plan this mission anyway, nor did I get the time to fix it up. I was also “CTRL + P” -ing all the enemy actors due to lack of time. You also said the mission felt “rushed”, that’s once again due to time constraint, which is in turn due to IRL stuff. Honestly the only thing that could have made my mission better than the sorry state it’s in currently, is a time machine...

 

Also by the way, this is only the second time I’ve used countdowns leading to explosions 😃

 

Edited by RithRake24
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zakarum5835
3 minutes ago, RithRake24 said:

I mentioned in the main topic that the new update of GTAForums means that the poll is not working. So I can’t use it.

oh my mistake

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40 minutes ago, omigawail said:

Don't forget to vote, guys.

I was about to say the same thing. The lack of votes is kind of disappointing so far.

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*IMPORTANT UPDATE*

 

The issue with making polls in GTAForums has been fixed. The poll has been made now. Please cast your votes by the deadline.

 

Good luck to all the participants!

Edited by RithRake24
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Ramaproduction97

The vote for this MOTW 130, is "Ryan" for the mission "Against for Embelm".

Because is for the best mission of MOTW 130.

Vote Ryan GG :)

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zakarum5835

Thx marco. I will play all missions tomorrow cuz today i'm very busy with my school.

 

EDIT: Can you make the countdown of this poll? @RithRake24 

 

that f*ckin' school

Edited by RyanAB
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El Penguin Bobo

I have played all missions and would like to review them all.

 

Against The Emblem by @RyanAB: This mission wasn't bad, but it also wasn't all that great. For one, the dialogue is practically nonsensical because of (no offense) the terrible grammar. (what do you mean by "everything is a sh*t"?) Story wasn't all that bad I guess but could have been executed much better. Now let's get the difficulty/gameplay. If it wasn't for Omigawail telling us where the key is, I would have been stuck on the opening door part, and that was only the beginning. The environment is fine itself but I don't really understand what's going on. Why does everything look.... destroyed? Is there an apocalypse going on?

 

Everything else is fine from there, until we get to the shooting part. If I have to use cheats to kill all of the enemies, that's kind of an issue. If there's one thing you shouldn't do while making a shooting sequence, is to never spam enemies at the player. The friend was useless at this part as he practically did nothing. Overrall, I would give this a 3/10 but since you're new to DYOM, I will give you a 5 instead. P.S: The audio files didn't work. I honestly don't know if this is coming from my end or not.

 

Robin Hood by @4nsmiley: The mission wasn't bad but there are a lot of flaws. For one, why is the partner named "?". I know you couldn't come up with a name, but you could have at least put Chris, Leo, Brad, etc... Now we're driving and one thing I noticed is that you used rings as the checkpoints....on the street. Not that it's bad or anything, but I would recommend using the big checkpoints, speaking of which, why did you make some of checkpoint markers so small? I know it's a nitpick here, but again, I would recommend making the checkpoints bigger.

 

On to the gameplay, it's about average. We get to the club or whatever it is, and we rent a room for some odd reason...I guess to not look suspicious but one thing I know, clubs don't really have room rentals. 

 

Everything else is fine from there, until we get the shooting sequence. I had to use a HESOYAM cheat because I almost died, but this is because I suck ass at the game.

 

Now one thing that REALLY bothered me, is the bug in the ending as what Omigawail mentioned. I couldn't even finish the mission because of this. With that being said, I would give this a 5.

 

Breakout by @omigawail: There's not really that much to say because it was pretty good. The audio files made it even better. One thing though, why was the time still going while playing the mission? And how the player get caught? And where the hell did the guy with the shovel come from? Other than that, it's a pretty good mission and I would give it a 9/10.

 

Manipulation by @RithRake24: The mission wasn't bad, but there are some flaws I gotta mention. For one, what happened to the volunteer? He just went invisible and that was it. 

 

Now onto the gameplay, I don't mind the repeated actors but you could have made some of them have different weapons. (Even though I didn't do this on my mission, lel) Shooting sequence wasn't hard or easy so that's good.

 

The cutscenes were pretty well crafted and the object movement was pretty impressive. I don't mind the whole "ending in explosion bit" but I wouldn't keep doing them in future missions if I were you... (rip invisible volunteer, lel)

 

Other than that, I will give this a 8/10 mainly because I thought you could have done this mission much better.

 

 

So, with that being said, I would vote for Omigawail's mission.

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@xXPinguXx What happened to the volunteer is part of the top ten questions science can't answer... Just kidding. Well, he's obviously still invisible because Rick got attacked before he could revert the volunteer back to normal. I didn't feel the need to expand the story further by going into more detail about the volunteer's fate, because the mission already has 97 objectives and lots of complicated moving objects, which were a pain to construct in the very little time I had. Thanks for your review, though! A lot of your points were quite true, though some were borrowed from omigawail's review. And also, omigawail couldn't complete Against the Emblem too until I told him on Discord PM where to find the key. XD

 

On 3/22/2019 at 12:54 AM, omigawail said:

Stand exactly next to the door of this container and it will open with the key inside it*Courtesy of Rithrake*.)

 

Edited by RithRake24
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El Penguin Bobo

@RithRake24 Something I also forgot to mention, at the hospital part, I actually that it was a hospital and you've done an amazing job at making the interior and making it look like a fake.

Edited by xXPinguXx

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8 minutes ago, xXPinguXx said:

@RithRake24 Something I also forgot to mention, at the hospital part, I actually that it was a hospital and you've done an amazing job at making the interior and making it look like a fake.

Thank you. It was such a huge pain to make. 

Spoiler

I actually had to make two hospital interiors, one detailed one in the sky for the dialogue cutscenes inside, and one not-so-detailed one on the desert floor for the scene where the deception is revealed.

 

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Here are my opinions on the missions, folks!

 

Against The Emblem by @RyanAB

Spoiler

REVIEW

My first thoughts when the mission started was that the object placement and sort-of post-apocalyptic ambience was really well done, which you don't really see with newcomers, despite no proper reason being pre-established about why the setting ended up like it is in the mission. Right from the get-go, without taking the time to establish at least a small hint of a story, protagonist is tasked with finding an emblem from a locked college, something that is apparently very significant, without explaining its significance and their true motivations behind stealing the emblem, apart from giving it to Uncle Karl. There is no reason given for why it is so significant that military-grade-weaponry-wielding peasants (I know I'm repeating a point from previous reviews but it's definitely worth repeating) would swarm anyone who steals it and go crazy on their triggers. Also, as omigawail mentioned in his review, the player is given no absolute clue on where the key to unlock the college might be, and I ran around the area for five minutes before using the jetpack cheat to fly around for another ten minutes, to no avail. Well, in the end, I somehow found it, after more than ten straight minutes of running around the town agitated, when I ran around the red container (see omigawail's review for location) multiple times. The betrayal in the end is not very effective as the player has no clue of the emblem's significance. Another major downside was the English, but I'm not judging this mission by the dialogue because RyanAB has already mentioned multiple times that his English is not very good as he's from Poland (I'm not judging, by the way). Overall, I'd say this mission definitely had more quality than I expected of a newcomer, with the object placement and overall presentation being of a good quality; however, the lack of a proper story or the lack of logic in some parts (as mentioned above) bring down my overall rating of this mission.

 

MY RATING: 4/10

 

HOW TO IMPROVE: You have great potential when it comes to presentation and objectives. What you need to do is to focus a bit more on the story. I'm not saying that you should make entirely plot-driven missions, but everything that needs to be pre-established or explained, must be pre-established or explained. The significance of the emblem should have been explained, and it also wouldn't have done any harm to have one or two short cutscenes at the start explaining why the setting looks like a war zone. Also, the peasants have no reasons to possess high-quality assault rifles; I would have been fine with pistols, micro-SMGs or even shotguns.

 

 

Robin Hood by @4nsmiley

Spoiler

REVIEW

We are thrown straight into action without much cutscenes in this mission as well, just like RyanAB's. We meet two friends (or partners, as they're described) who plan to rob a brothel because its owner keeps all his money in a single room. The driving objectives were set too far from each other, so the dialogue felt quite disconnected, but that's not a very major issue. I also liked the parts in the mission where you talk to the "hoe" and you "change clothes". But the I felt the guards didn't serve their purpose. I'm not going to elaborate on that here because omigawail has done a good job of describing the problems with this part of the mission, you can refer to his review. Also, who were the people after me in the car? Who's crew were they? Your dead partner's crew or the brothel boss's crew? I'm not sure if the static camera angle towards the end of the mission was deliberate or accidental, but no matter where I stood, the enemies refused to come into the view of the camera, so after long minutes of pointless shooting I entered ALLCARSGOBOOM (all cars explode cheat) because I couldn't really be bothered just shooting into empty space. The enemies died when the cars driving on the road close to them exploded due to the cheat. Overall, a pretty good mission with some good elements, but major flaws in logic and the static camera bug brought my rating down drastically.

 

MY RATING: 5/10

 

HOW TO IMPROVE: I think the reason why you had your driving objectives too far apart from each other was due to my own advice on your MP The Chase for Tenpenny, where the objectives were placed too close to each other. But, @4nsmiley, your MP had long dialogues with the objectives too close to each other, and this mission had really short dialogues with the objectives too far away from each other. The distance of the objectives from each other really should depend on the amount of text that you're putting into the objectives. Also, if the static camera was done intentionally, you could have adjusted the camera angle so it covered a much larger area. Also, be more careful when handling characters such as guards, and make sure they're there for a reason. You do have a lot of potential 😀.

 

Betrayal by @xXPinguXx

Spoiler

REVIEW

What really stood out for me in Pingu's mission is that the dialogue was very clearly written, and the cutscenes were very neatly done. It was always made clear who was talking and what was happening. However, there were lots of issues and I feel that omigawail's review once again perfectly echoes the concerns I had when playing the mission:

 

On 3/22/2019 at 12:54 AM, omigawail said:

The mysterious monk was... well.. mysterious. What was he doing on the roof of that building and how did he even get there lmao. How did he "kidnap" Johnny with the police there? None of the characters have clear motives there, Ricardo's betrayal for example was unexplained. Why did he have to kill his friend to "start doing business"?

Also, the four goons looked like clones of each other, but I should probably practise what I preach first. (Even though the time constraint that had when making "manipulation" influenced me to use CTRL+P on all the actors, which I haven't really done on any other mission of mine.) Otherwise, the mission was actually fun. I liked the revenge bit - the shootout at the meat factory. Overall, the mission is done well, albeit with just a few minor issues.

 

MY RATING: 7/10

 

HOW TO IMPROVE:  A little more background information on the benefits Ricardo could have from killing his friends would have been good.

 

Breakout @omigawail

Spoiler

REVIEW

This was the most special entry in my opinion, and that is solely due to its uniqueness and its willingness to step away from the "betrayal" cliche and give the idea of deception a unique portrayal, which was what I was expecting when I chose the theme. The mission also attempts to also incorporate unique gameplay elements such as avoiding being sighted and the time limit, and I also found the cutscenes from the POV of the protagonist very effective, as it sort of immerses the player into what the protagonist is seeing and therefore gives more insight into his confusion. There were almost no issues at all that I could pick out, except for just one: why does the room the player walks into have multiples weapons in it placed together? It didn't look to me like it was a weapon storage area or anything. This is really just a nitpick though. Otherwise, the mission was really fun, with the shootout sequence designed masterfully as with all the cutscenes. There is nothing more to say. Brilliant mission - you should definitely design more, omigawail.

 

MY RATING: 9/10

 

HOW TO IMPROVE: Nothing really, apart from the fact that you forgot to publish the mission.

 

EDIT: I realised I forgot to mention who I'm voting for. My vote goes to @omigawail, well done man.

 

Edited by RithRake24
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The deadline has been extended by 12 hours to account for the inconvenience caused.

 

THE NEW DEADLINE

Voting: 24 March 2019 - 06:00 (GMT+10)

 

Also, countdown to deadline...

Edited by RithRake24
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Congratulations to @omigawail for winning MOTW #130!
 
You have 2 days to post the thread of the new MOTW. Please give us a good theme!

 

Edited by RithRake24
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