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Sage Sparks

One-Girl Gang

Recommended Posts

Sage Sparks

zzDtu7b.jpg

CHARACTERS

 

Elise Powell

A nineteen year-old girl, who is experienced in combat. She never was the stereotype girl who would play with dolls, like pink and dream of becoming like Barbie. Being the daughter of a gang leader, she had to adapt. But she hated what her father was getting her involved in. As naive as she was, she went to the police one day, and got her father into serious trouble. Since he cared about his "business" more than her, he ordered for her to be killed. A young man from the gang, who always liked her, offered to help her fake her death and move on the East Coast. He succeeded, and the gang and her father believed her to be dead.

 

Elise's ped is Michelle, and also, that is her in the cover. Please don't judge it if it's bad, I know it might be. I spent some time photoshopping that, and I didn't even watch a tutorial lol. I hope you like it, don't hesitate to tell me what you think. But just don't be harsh or rude.

 

THIS MP IS A WORK IN PROGRESS, WHICH MEANS MORE CHARACTERS ARE COMING SOON.

 

SYNOPSIS

 

Years after moving to the East Coast, Elise returns to San Andreas after hearing that the man who helped her when she was younger got killed by the gang when he wanted to leave them, with the intention to attend his funeral and also avenge his death. But that wasn't the only reason for her to want to take down her father's clan. She also heard that they have gained a lot of influence and that they are corrupting the cities. Undeterred by the power her father's gang has, she is determined to take them down and starts moving against them, eventually revealing to the gang and her own father that she is alive, and willing to fight them.
 

PROLOGUE IS NOW AVAILABLE TO PLAY. You can download it here.

Don't forget to tell me what you think about this idea!

 

Theme Song (I know it's a bit cheesy, but most of the lyrics fit the character, and I like it)

 

 

Edited by Sage Sparks

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omigawail

The story is new, we do not have much women protagonists (Lack of actor skins is one of the main reasons) so Elise Powell would make for a great main character.

 

The revenge story is a bit cliché'd but you added your own twist to it (daddy issues, hehe).

 

So far, your writing is great. The grammar is good and the text does not sound cheesy like some of the other stuff here, but I ain't here to read a book. I am here to play.

 

With a story like this, I anticipate good missions. I mean the gameplay, the dialogue, the world-building, and the detail, so please do not disappoint ;)

 

Note: The font in the topic is very big and the blue colors are hard to read. When you add more stuff to the thread make the formatting better.

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GKHEAT

looking coool

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Sage Sparks
27 minutes ago, omigawail said:

The story is new, we do not have much women protagonists (Lack of actor skins is one of the main reasons) so Elise Powell would make for a great main character.

 

The revenge story is a bit cliché'd but you added your own twist to it (daddy issues, hehe).

 

So far, your writing is great. The grammar is good and the text does not sound cheesy like some of the other stuff here, but I ain't here to read a book. I am here to play.

 

With a story like this, I anticipate good missions. I mean the gameplay, the dialogue, the world-building, and the detail, so please do not disappoint ;)

 

Note: The font in the topic is very big and the blue colors are hard to read. When you add more stuff to the thread make the formatting better.

Thank you! I'll try my best to not disappoint. As I said, most of my missions where goofy random stuff but I began making serious missions some time ago and hopefully I'll make something good out of this. Also, thanks for the formatting tips. I'll make sure to make the post look better.

12 minutes ago, GKHEAT said:

looking coool

Thank you!

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GKHEAT

Need Headers?

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Sage Sparks
1 hour ago, GKHEAT said:

Need Headers?

Sorry to ask but what do you mean?

Prologue is now released! I've put a link in the topic for you guys to play!

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Martin_Strada

Actually, the story is promosing, I want to play this but i don't actually have a time, cus i'm busy. :( sadlife

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Sage Sparks

The prologue is out @Martin_Strada, if you get any time I'd appreciate if you played it :)

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Seth

Why the "Prologue" is not in DYOM site?

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Sage Sparks

@Nuddle KingI actually don't have an account there, but I might make one soon.

Also, a notice for everyone, the prologue is like a premiere. The next update will be when I finish the whole Season 1 (all mission slots). But I work pretty fast so it should come soon.

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Sage Sparks

@Nuddle King also did you download and play the mission? If so what do you think?

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Seth

I will play it when Full Season 1 is out, and give a review.

 

Spoiler

Plus don't mention me, Please.

 

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GKHEAT
7 hours ago, Sage Sparks said:

Sorry to ask but what do you mean?

Prologue is now released! I've put a link in the topic for you guys to play!

I asked you, You want headers or logo for decorating your topic, I'll make it for you. :)

 

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Sage Sparks
9 minutes ago, GKHEAT said:

I asked you, You want headers or logo for decorating your topic, I'll make it for you. :)

 

I meant what headers are. I'm kinda new to this forum thing, but sure, sounds fine if you really are willing to do them for me.

15 minutes ago, Nuddle King said:

I will play it when Full Season 1 is out, and give a review.

 

  Reveal hidden contents

Plus don't mention me, Please.

 

Okay, and sorry.

18 minutes ago, Nuddle King said:

I will play it when Full Season 1 is out, and give a review.

 

  Reveal hidden contents

Plus don't mention me, Please.

 

Also, if you have made any reviews before, can you please give me a link to any of them? I'm curious to see how they look.

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omigawail
4 minutes ago, Sage Sparks said:

I meant what headers are. I'm kinda new to this forum thing, but sure, sounds fine if you really are willing to do them for me.

Okay, and sorry.

Also, if you have made any reviews before, can you please give me a link to any of them? I'm curious to see how they look.

GKHeat makes logos and graphic design, he does really cool stuff like this here.

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Sage Sparks
1 minute ago, omigawail said:

GKHeat makes logos and graphic design, he does really cool stuff like this here.

I've actually seen that, indeed a great logo.

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GKHEAT
25 minutes ago, omigawail said:

GKHeat makes logos and graphic design, he does really cool stuff like this here.

 

23 minutes ago, Sage Sparks said:

I've actually seen that, indeed a great logo.

Thanks guys, I am happy some guys cares about this

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Sage Sparks

Guys, has anyone of you actually played the prologue? If so, please tell me what you think.

Your feedback will help me improve both my mission designing skills and this series. Thank you in advance! ☺️

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GKHEAT

I'll give you logo and review tomorrow,ok

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omigawail
14 minutes ago, Sage Sparks said:

Guys, has anyone of you actually played the prologue? If so, please tell me what you think.

Your feedback will help me improve both my mission designing skills and this series. Thank you in advance! ☺️

The prologue is short. It doesn't really explain much, so you need to read the synopsis in this thread to understand the missionpack. You have to fight 4 enemies at once in melee, which is a bit slow and tedious but not hard (You start with no weapons either, so I focused on the knife guy to kill the other 3 with a knife). It was not very clear, but from what I understood one of them made it out and her identity has been revealed, so the gangsters (And her dad) know she's back in LS.

 

I like the slowly zooming out shot in the end, really sets the mood of the rest of the storyline. Some soundtrack effects would be good though.

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Sage Sparks
9 minutes ago, omigawail said:

The prologue is short. It doesn't really explain much, so you need to read the synopsis in this thread to understand the missionpack. You have to fight 4 enemies at once in melee, which is a bit slow and tedious but not hard (You start with no weapons either, so I focused on the knife guy to kill the other 3 with a knife). It was not very clear, but from what I understood one of them made it out and her identity has been revealed, so the gangsters (And her dad) know she's back in LS.

 

I like the slowly zooming out shot in the end, really sets the mood of the rest of the storyline. Some soundtrack effects would be good though.

Actually, I haven't specified that the man knew who she was. I'm still thinking about it, and when I'm done with the season I might remake the prologue. So technically consider this a beta demo lol. Anyway, thanks a lot for your opinion!

24 minutes ago, GKHEAT said:

I'll give you logo and review tomorrow,ok

Alrighty, thank you!

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SanLiberty

The Prologue was pretty good, nice job. But I think it should of been a LITTLE longer. :)

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GKHEAT

2d2hdnd.jpg

 

Manage it(Crop and distribute them and use)

 

Your Prologue is awesome, keep it up.

but, you need some more practice.

 

"practice makes the man perfect"

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Sage Sparks
Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, GKHEAT said:

2d2hdnd.jpg

 

Manage it(Crop and distribute them and use)

 

Your Prologue is awesome, keep it up.

but, you need some more practice.

 

"practice makes the man perfect"

Thank you a lot!

And thank you all guys! As I said, when I am done with the season I might remake or extend the prologue. I'm working on the second mission right now!

Edited by Sage Sparks

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