The "r u a boy or girl" question

[JaberDoe]

With my GTA: Online character being a female, and a good looking character if I may proudly say so myself (sounds kinda weird), a LOT of people ask me in-game: "are u a boy or girl?"

 

For other guys with female characters, or even girls with female characters, how do/would you respond to that?

 

Also, how often do you get asked that?

Because I get that question in 7/10 sessions I'm on!

 

[xwinkx_girlYakuza]

When I don't have my mic on my reply would depends..

 

1. If they're in my crew or joined my org/mc and help me do missions and they're nice I'd tell them the truth.

2. If they're one of those griefers or k/d warrior types I'd usually ignore them and don't say anything.

3. If they're creepy and keeps following me around I'd tell them I'm a boy. Works most of the time.

 

p.s. even some of the nice ones eventually becomes creepy after awhile. I sometimes hide my online status because of this 

Edited June 25, 2018 by xwinkx_girlYakuza

[Yellow Dog with Cone]

[Aghakhi]

Hell I'm probably lucky or something, that kind of thing almost never happens to me

[HamwithCheese]

Ignore for the love of god. You're usually dealing with a 14 year old or someone with the iq of a 14 year old.

Edited June 25, 2018 by HamwithCheese

[REXX]

I used to get it a lot back when I occassionally did freeroam stuff in full lobbies. Most of the time, I reckon they were little kiddies with just as much pubes as dinosaurs left on Earth.

 

I always respond I'm a bloke. No shame in it

[Nutduster]

Eww, pervs. 

 

Relevant: I used to play with a guy (emphasis on "used to") who would spot female characters in the lobby list, try to guess by their gamertag and profile if they were really female, and then would invite them to the party just to hit on them. What a knob.

 

Also relevant, albeit tangential: my character isn't female, but he is black (I'm not). It has been very eye-opening how much racial abuse gets thrown at me when I beat someone in PvP. Gotten at least half a dozen people comm banned for acting out their inner Grand Wizard, and many more than that have messaged me horrible stuff in game.

[Shadowfennekin]

19 minutes ago, Voodoo-Hendrix said:

"f*ck off, Professor Oak" would be a proper response to the question lmao

[FlacidJack]

I go along with it but I usually let them know the truth before we get to third base.

[MrClownSocks]

I have a female character even though irl I’m a 22 year old man. For the first 3 1/2 years I had a male character so when I created my new PSN account I decided to try the female character to try something different. Glad I did. Opens up new options. 

 

But to your point OP I have been asked this before and I generally just ignore it because I feel it takes a disturbed person to want to find that kind of info on an online video game. Even if I was a woman why the hell do you think I’d ever be interested in getting involved with some weirdo on a game who chances are is someone very disturbed. 

 

Also my name is MrClownSocks in game. Yes I have a female character, but why the hell do you think the name MrClownSocks means woman? I think you’d have to be a special kind of f*cking stupid to think “MrClownSocks” might be a woman’s name.

 

lol

[Cackling Jack]

I tell them im a female in a mans body. Some people work it out. Others not so much. If there a friend or helping ill be honest with them. Playing as a female character has its moments.

Edited June 25, 2018 by Cackling Jack

[ShadowlessDevil]

Female here..In game and IRL

 

Sometimes, I'll get a message and the person will call me dude. I correct them and tell them I'm a female..and they are apologizing LOL... I remember once a guy actually apologized for killing me...I killed him him back and wrote .. Apology accepted :)   haha

 

[Willy A. Jeep]

I've played online games with both female and male characters, much as I do with any sort of game with character customization. Whatever works, however I'm feeling, y'know. I have, interestingly, avoided much of the "a/s/l" and such questions, though I will say that, in GTA Online, more people have been friendly to me when I use my female character, even though I'd bet she's not the best-looking character around. Then again, I do typically drive around in more respectable cars with my female character than my male.

 

I have had the experience in other online games far more often, though. Quite a few times in Team Fortress 2 - a game that has an all-male roster of playable characters! - though, upon asking, I've been told that I sound feminine in my text chat. I don't tell my sex online, and I figure my usage of generally masculine pseudonyms helps the assumption that I'm male, but it is the internet. Nobody knows you're a dog, after all.

[Guest]

(female RL, playing female)

 

tl;dr: I avoid answering that question at all. If friend or crew mate asks, I confirm but I usually then try to somehow feed him the message that it shouldn't matter, that I'm not feeling entitled to "special treatment" by the fact (by which I really mean he shouldn't), and hope for the best.

 

 

 

I'm not operating much in public lobbies, but when I do, the question rises maybe 3/10 for me so far; then again, this is textchat, I'm working without mike/headphones (a simple matter of privacy, since I'm very seldom alone in my gaming den), so there is probably more questioning 'on the ether'? Maybe I try and find out some time, out of curiosity. 

 

Anyway, I ignore such questions entirely by now, not matter if they are meant as an opener for the whole online-girlfriend thing, or just an insult - sometimes I get the impression that boys playing females are more widely accepted than girls just playing as girls, or girls playing at all, still. (How many females are playing as males, by the way, just to better "blend in" and be left alone?)

Earlier I had myself getting provoked into confirming I'm female (unwise) and asking back why this was of any interest (unwise, II). The latter was genuine interest on my part, as I'm puzzled why people after only, say, 10 minutes of shared gameplay want to break the immersion in such a crude fashion. I mean, nobody asks: "So, are you a quasi-immortal, gunslinging, serial traffic offender with magical folded-space-pockets in RL, too?". This is a game and we decide to be in part someone else, why break the spell?

 

I can answer this myself by now: Multiplayer is not only a game, but social interaction, and people naturally take interest in one another. The more time you spend with someone online, a chance encounter in a race developing into a whole series of races hanging out, a friend request, job invitations, then crew activities, etc., the more the interest in the person behind the char becomes legitimate, I absolutely understand that. But unfortunately I have to say from my personal experiences that so far the majority of my interactions with males, once we entered the let's-talk-like-real-people stage, have gone awkward or outright creepy. Sometimes they are just idiots, getting angry when I'm not following their advances, unable to grasp why any "normal" girl could possibly resist their manly Charmes. But other make me really sad when I realize there is just an utterly lonely man who has really started fantasizing about getting together. It makes me more sad than angry, overall. And I feel guilt, too, since I can be pretty playful and outspoken, too, although I always say from the start that there will be nothing more.

 

I may provoke too much. In Central Europe (don't know how it is in US), "making out with black girls" is still pretty much of a fetish for a certain type of man, and I have been strongly advised to play as someone else, anyone else in fact other than what I am. But how can hiding be a solution?

 

 

 

Edited June 25, 2018 by Guest
fixed some grammar

[Pocket Fox]

Do you have an internet boyfriend?

[xwinkx_girlYakuza]

Spoiler

8 minutes ago, Lucy_Woooolfe said:

(female RL, playing female)

 

tl;dr: I avoid answering that question at all. If friend or crew mate asks, I confirm but I usually then try to somehow feed him the message that it shouldn't matter, that I'm not feeling entitled to "special treatment" by the fact (by which I really mean he shouldn't), and hope for the best.

 

 

 

I'm not operating much in public lobbies, but when I do, the question rises maybe 3/10 for me so far; then again, this is textchat, I'm working without mike/headphones (a simple matter of privacy, since I'm very seldom alone in my gaming den), so there is probably more questioning 'on the ether'? Maybe I try and find out some time, out of curiosity. 

 

Anyway, I ignore such questions entirely by now, not matter if they are meant as an opener for the whole online-girlfriend thing, or just an insult - sometimes I get the impression that boys playing females are more widely accepted than girls just playing as girls, or girls playing at all, still. (How many females are playing as males, by the way, just to better "blend in" and be left alone?)

Earlier I had myself getting provoked into confirming I'm female (unwise) and asking back why this was of any interest (unwise, II). The latter was genuine interest on my part, as I'm puzzled why people after only, say, 10 minutes of shared gameplay want to break the immersion in such a crude fashion. I mean, nobody asks: "So, are you a quasi-immortal, gunslinging, serial traffic offender with magical folded-space-pockets in RL, too?". This is a game and we decide to be in part someone else, why break the spell?

 

I can answer this myself by now: Multiplayer is not only a game, but social interaction, and people naturally take interest in one another. The more time you spend with someone online, a chance encounter in a race developing into a whole series of races hanging out, a friend request, job invitations, then crew activities, etc., the more the interest in the person behind the char becomes legitimate, I absolutely understand that. But unfortunately I have to say from my personal experiences that so far the majority of my interactions with males, once we entered the let's-talk-like-real-people stage, have gone awkward or outright creepy. Sometimes they are just idiots, getting angry when I'm not following their advances, unable to grasp why any "normal" girl could possibly resist their manly Charmes. But other make me really sad when I realize there is just an endlessly lonely man who has really started fantasizing about getting together. It makes me more sad than angry, overall.

 

I may provoke too much. In CET timezone (don't know how it is in US), "making out with black girls" is still pretty much of a fetish for a certain type of man, and I have been strongly advised to play as someone else, anyone else in fact other than what I am. But how can hiding be a solution?

 

 

 

 

 

^ This.

For me the "obedient Asian girl fetish" is my cross to bear. You don't wanna know what have been said to me both in voice chat and text. This is the main reason why anytime my older brother or my dad(my mom not so much lol) sees me with my headset on they get super angry  

[Smooth Longsack]

Jet grief to infinity. No grils can fly like the dudes. Sorry for the misogyny. 

[HamwithCheese]

I try to make it obvious that I'm a dude once we start talking. Doesn't hurt that my dumbass user name and "way of typing" sort of enforces that. 

 

Anyways couple weeks ago some kid asked me to a "gta date". Yeah, bad enough, but then my friend that was also in the lobby said he asked her out as well.

 

Like, dude, its bad enough youre asking for gta dates, but you're also a gta f*ckboi? Come on.

Edited June 25, 2018 by HamwithCheese

[xwinkx_girlYakuza]

 

1 minute ago, Smooth Longsack said:

Jet grief to infinity. No grils can fly like the dudes. Sorry for the misogyny. 

I've shot down too many guys in jets to believe you sir! 

Edited June 25, 2018 by xwinkx_girlYakuza

[PetrolCB]

I usually ignore them, but sometimes I’ll text back “yes I am a girl”, cease communications and if they come after me, I’ll go after them. Most of the time though I just relay whatever dumb sh*t they’ll say along with other things, to whoever else is in my chat party, who also happen to be in the lobby, so we can have a good laugh. 

 

To clairfy, this is in-game. My PSN is private and nobody who isn’t a friend can message me. I’m not an idiot, I utilize my options. 

 

It was a while back and we were in party, but had switched to lobby because we saw a lot of people were chirping while we were killing. Some kept complaining about me. “This lady keeps killing me!”

 

While I always listen, I always stay mute in public and very, very rarely chime in, unless it’s something snarky. So I threw on a falsetto and said something to him and whoever else was bitching about me. That was the extent. 

Edited June 25, 2018 by PetrolCB

[Rafae]

why tf does it matter? the fact that they even had to ask makes things awkward from the get go. even if I can tell a girl is a girl irl or if they're a girl in game but it's hard to tell what they're like irl i never ask this type of sh*t in the first place.

[xwinkx_girlYakuza]

^ Underneath that rough exterior lies a scholar and a gentleman 

[Rafae]

3 minutes ago, xwinkx_girlYakuza said:

^ Underneath that rough exterior lies a scholar and a gentleman 

 

[wizooord]

Never once in 15 years of playing multiplayer games I asked someone this question. Even when I was fourteen and genuinely curious I understood that asking for someone's gender will at best lead to some awkwardness and me appearing as a neanderthal. When someone asks me I answer but from that point forth I cannot unsee the idiot in that person. Like, how could this information benefit anyone in their right mind when playing games over the internet? You planning a wedding or...?

[Femme Fatale]

I tell them "Why don't you come over to my place, and find out?"

 

Nah, jk, I ignore them. f*ck off with your gamer girl worship..

[MeisterJazz]

I only told a guy I was a girl once. His thirsty ass allowed me to do 60 races to unlock all vehicle parts and gave me most of the money on a heist. You wouldn't believe the hate mail I received when I told him im actually a guy. 

[Rafae]

6 minutes ago, MeisterJazz said:

I only told a guy I was a girl once. His thirsty ass allowed me to do 60 races to unlock all vehicle parts and gave me most of the money on a heist. You wouldn't believe the hate mail I received when I told him im actually a guy. 

 

LMFAOOOOO

[xwinkx_girlYakuza]

11 minutes ago, MeisterJazz said:

I only told a guy I was a girl once. His thirsty ass allowed me to do 60 races to unlock all vehicle parts and gave me most of the money on a heist. You wouldn't believe the hate mail I received when I told him im actually a guy. 

You're an evil genius! LOL

[alkaline_]

when i get this question i say: "i'm a fluffy penguin hihihi"... problem is, responses to that often go this way: "awww, you are a female"... hihihi

[jackrobot]

I have 2 accounts that have 3 Female characters and 1 Male (56 year old grandfather here) and have only been asked my sex once by a poor 12 year old boy who fell in love with my first Female char back on PS3. He was devastated when he found out and unfriended me immediately lol.

 

In the early days of online it was a definite advantage to play as a Female but not so much these days. I just assume that the majority of Female chars are male IRL. 

Edited June 25, 2018 by jackrobot