The GTA Darwin Awards.

[Ice_cold2016]

First nomination is this chap. Playing the Boggy Dan Problaymo ACT 2 Doomsday Heist. Or should i say trying to play. This went on for about half an hour or so.(Shortened video down to 3 mins or so) Me and my girlfriend just sat and watched him in awe with a cuppa tea like.

 

[Sanches]

I thought i was granted with Darwin award.
The only thing i've won and now it's gone!

[FlacidJack]

Wow that randumb was all effort I have a feeling he's wearing a sweatband!

 

I got one from back in the day of the old heists, god I love hearing Lester say "only the thermite charges bla bla bla boom!"

If I remember correctly, I didn't move until I pointed because I was lol'ing too hard.

Edited June 22, 2018 by FlacidJack

[D9fred95]

Having the Darwin Awards in GTAO is like having awards for "most anger in a CoD match". Almost everyone gets a trophy.

[Ice_cold2016]

1 hour ago, FlacidJack said:

Wow that randumb was all effort I have a feeling he's wearing a sweatband!

 

I got one from back in the day of the old heists, god I love hearing Lester say "only the thermite charges bla bla bla boom!"

If I remember correctly, I didn't move until I pointed because I was lol'ing too hard.

It amazes me how so many people don't listen. The game tells you what to do and what buttons to press. lol

[Bloodytears1666]

Guy enjoys himself, and you bother them with mission objectives. Where else you could swim for good half of an hour?!

[ALifeOfMisery]

Sorry, going to have to recycle these geniuses.

 

[Ice_cold2016]

1 hour ago, Bloodytears1666 said:

Guy enjoys himself, and you bother them with mission objectives. Where else you could swim for good half of an hour?!

Rumour has it he's still swimming. He doesn't know how to get out of the water.

Edited June 22, 2018 by Ice_cold2016

[Grimoire]

Gotta love idiots that crash jets seconds before finishing the hydra setup. I put it on normal expect one person to fail but not two....

 

Edited June 22, 2018 by GRlMOlRE

[REXX]

The fella that designed the Jester Classic. He deserves a Darwin award.

[Ice_cold2016]

I wish i had the video of the Act 1 Doomday heist, the setup mission where you have to go into the server farm. The game tells you numerous times to go in silent, to use silent weapons, if you go loud you fail the mission, that it's a black ops mission, you even go in in a stealth chopper. Over 30 times my team went loud. That and committed suicide when trying to get down the ladder.

[FlacidJack]

The best Darwins moments imo are noobs swimming on PC. Apparently swimming with a keyboard is pretty deadly, it's the funniest thing ever to watch them below the surface doing nothing to save themselves. That Dispatch 2 mission is the ultimate test, I recently had the pleasure to watch 2 players drown side by side just spinning in circles feet away from a ladder. It was painfully funny.

 

Edited June 24, 2018 by FlacidJack

[Grimoire]

1 minute ago, FlacidJack said:

The best Darwins moments imo are noobs swimming on PC. Apparently swimming with a keyboard is pretty deadly, it's the funniest thing ever to watch them below the surface doing nothing to save themselves. That Dispatch 2 mission is the ultimate test, I recently had the pleasure to watch 2 players drown side by side just spinning in circles feet away from a ladder. It was painfully funny.

Been playing GTA on pc for years and yes they are not good swimming or flying....Especially the noobs. Shooting however they are MLG level gods. 

[livejoker]

Do kamikaze count? Cause this guy isn't the first trying to insert his skull up my ass.

Edited June 23, 2018 by livejoker

[Ice_cold2016]

1 hour ago, livejoker said:

Do kamikaze count? Cause this guy isn't the first trying to insert his skull up my ass.

Yup. That's like trying to punch someone missing and falling over. lol

[carnerd3000]

I once failed to complete the Phantom Wedge mission because the third guy who was supposed to get the drugs wouldn't get them, and just kept using the Phantom Wedge to ram police cars. I even messaged or told him on the mic a few times that he needs to get the drugs, but he wouldn't listen.

[Sentinel Driver]

Randoms should just be banned from playing GTA because they suck so bad. Although I have to admit that it's very fascinating to wonder at their stupidity and inability to follow even the simplest of instructions. And if you need to relieve some stress and maybe pad your KD a bit then just go hunt IGN noobs in freemode. It's funny watching them try to snipe you with the regular sniper in third person. And trying to take cover behind cars only to find a rocket coming up their ass

[REXX]

4 hours ago, Sentinel Driver said:

Randoms should just be banned from playing GTA because they suck so bad.

As the end of the day, we're all randoms really.

[livejoker]

23 minutes ago, REXX said:

As the end of the day, we're all randoms really.

This post blew my mind. It's 4:30 AM and I'm contemplating what life means and how randoms leave our game and we never see them again and how many are stuck in the clouds.

Damn...

[FuturePastNow]

I had to dig through my screenshots folder for this.

 

Special cargo collection. Landed my Buzzard on the garage deck, hopped out, climbed the ladder right into the still-spinning blades. I actually had no idea how I died until I got back up and saw the blood. smh

 

[Ice_cold2016]

1 hour ago, FuturePastNow said:

I had to dig through my screenshots folder for this.

 

Special cargo collection. Landed my Buzzard on the garage deck, hopped out, climbed the ladder right into the still-spinning blades. I actually had no idea how I died until I got back up and saw the blood. smh

 

I've seen that done at the very end of the Pacific Standard Heist Finale. We all made it to the boat with all the money, then the guy with the money get's out the helicopter and runs straight into the helicopter blades! lol

 

That and all got to the boat only for the driver to beach the boat on land 1 second after setting off.

[Tao Cheng]

17 hours ago, Ice_cold2016 said:

First nomination is this chap. Playing the Boggy Dan Problaymo ACT 2 Doomsday Heist. Or should i say trying to play. This went on for about half an hour or so.(Shortened video down to 3 mins or so) Me and my girlfriend just sat and watched him in awe with a cuppa tea like.

 

Chances are, this person is trolling you.

[Ice_cold2016]

59 minutes ago, Tao Cheng said:

Chances are, this person is trolling you.

Nope he wasn't trolling. I put him to the test to see after. I destroyed a Stromberg and quit the mission so we entered the same lobby so i could go 1 on 1 with him. His tactics during the 1 on 1 were very, very poor. He would do stuff like go passive on a motorbike then pull up beside me come out of passive and try to uzi me down. Real amatuer stuff like that. And he got super angry when i killed him.

[Gaffa]

15 hours ago, FlacidJack said:

The best Darwins moments imo are noobs swimming on PC. Apparently swimming with a keyboard is pretty deadly, it's the funniest thing ever to watch them below the surface doing nothing to save themselves. That Dispatch 2 mission is the ultimate test, I recently had the pleasure to watch 2 players drown side by side just spinning in circles feet away from a ladder. It was painfully funny.

You have to admit though, the controls on PC for keyboard players when it comes to swimming are absolutely horrific... 
Press W out of water what happens? The vehicle moves forward, ascends or the character moves forward. 
Press W in the water and the character moves forward. Okay that's fine. 
Press W underwater and the character moves downward because forward has suddenly become something else... 

Thinking about it maybe an award needs to be given to the chap that designed that. 

[kcole4001]

7 hours ago, livejoker said:

This post blew my mind. It's 4:30 AM and I'm contemplating what life means and how randoms leave our game and we never see them again and how many are stuck in the clouds.

Damn...

 

Like odd socks that escape the dryer...

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

1 hour ago, FuturePastNow said:

I had to dig through my screenshots folder for this.

 

Special cargo collection. Landed my Buzzard on the garage deck, hopped out, climbed the ladder right into the still-spinning blades. I actually had no idea how I died until I got back up and saw the blood. smh

 

 

Also if you park your Buzzard a little too close in front of your office and run up the steps.

Kinda cool how you just start to see the tips spinning by as you get diced.

Or land on someone and get out, then decide to pick up their cash only to walk into the rear rotor...

Edited June 23, 2018 by kcole4001

[Dburger]

Click to play. Some of these clips are over 2 years old...wow. Makes me feel a bit nostalgic for simpler times. 

 

I don't know why the hell this guy jumped out so close to the ground. And yes, I have a fully insured rusty Tornado and love it. 

GTA Online Funny Moment 

 

Probably the last "acquire EMP" job I did before this week...

GTAO 

 

GTAO 

 

GTAO 

 

...oops

GTAO 

 

Sometimes it just happens.

GTAO 

 

The longest race I've ever done (and won) in GTA by a long shot. I don't remember how many laps it was, but it certainly took an hour and a half to complete. 

 

GTAO 

 

GTAO 

 

The one time I've ever done this...

GTAO 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[FuturePastNow]

On 6/22/2018 at 6:10 PM, FlacidJack said:

The best Darwins moments imo are noobs swimming on PC. Apparently swimming with a keyboard is pretty deadly, it's the funniest thing ever to watch them below the surface doing nothing to save themselves. That Dispatch 2 mission is the ultimate test, I recently had the pleasure to watch 2 players drown side by side just spinning in circles feet away from a ladder. It was painfully funny.

Swimming with keyboard and mouse is actually suuuuuuuper easy. Just hold down the shift key and aim with the mouse, you will swim in the direction you're looking. Hit space to dive if you're on the surface. And that's it, that's all you need to know.

[Red Lynx 23]

This guy, who thought he would crash the plane he was flying into my Insurgent Pickup Custom.

 

 

 

 

Edited June 24, 2018 by Red Lynx 23

[ytowntuneup]

I'd like to nominate myself, for running into the tail rotor of a Buzzard. Twice.

[FlacidJack]

22 hours ago, Gaffa said:

You have to admit though, the controls on PC for keyboard players when it comes to swimming are absolutely horrific... 
Press W out of water what happens? The vehicle moves forward, ascends or the character moves forward. 
Press W in the water and the character moves forward. Okay that's fine. 
Press W underwater and the character moves downward because forward has suddenly become something else... 

Thinking about it maybe an award needs to be given to the chap that designed that. 

Lol yea I admit that is pretty bad. Happened again today after I typed to all the randoms "Shift S" multiple times before and during the short swim. So I just made this for fun...