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Respect2

All Spam e-mail collections

Recommended Posts

Respect2

This game has more random spam messages in-game PDA. In this thread there are absolutely all messages. Have a fun.

 

 

 

 

#1

From: Chun Woo

Subject: (SPAM?) fwd: fwd: fwd: Don't fwd this email

 

People are being duped into innocently passing on spam emails to friends, colleagues and family.

Don't fall into this trap!

Be sure to warn all your friends, colleagues and family to do likewise by simply forwarding this email to them.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#2

From: Father Derek

Subject: (SPAM?) My son, we need to talk...

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

These new greater-girth pills from Mollis are the best! Now your bitch will feel the pinch of every inch! Click here for more info.

 

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#3

From: Mom

Subject: (SPAM?) Call Home...

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Get our new spurt pills and give her a pasting like she's never known!

Click on the link below, to see more: Drowning In It!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#4

From: Bagder

Subject: (SPAM?) Your email account.

 

We are conducting tsts to our emal system. If you do not send this emal on to at least ten people, your acccount with us will be closed.

Thank you.

Joe King.

Bagder IT dept.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#5

From: Mr. E. Mann

Subject: (SPAM?) Virus alert!

 

The Cow-Worm Virus has been detected on your PC!

To remedy this problem, lift off your PC's outer casing and thrust a cattle-prod into the wiring.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Should you ever need to replace your PC, buy a Fruit: They're immune to all viruses, malware and software that isn't arty.

Voted 'Best Ornament that goes Beep' at Code Wanker Meet 2008

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

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#6

From: A. Virus

Subject: (SPAM?) Virus Alert!

 

A Virus! A Virus!

Send this message to everyone you know DO IT NOW! Then do it again, every hour, on the hour!

A Virus! A Virus!

Sweet Lord! A Virus!

 

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#7

From: Your Friend

Subject: (SPAM?) Free Money!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Billionaire T.M.T is going to the Moon!

Before he sets off on his epic trek he's going to give away his entire mega-millions fortune!

Forward this message to as many people as you can. For each recipient you will be awarded $245. For each person they send it on to you will receive $200.

Even though we don't know your address, don't worry, we'll find you and get that cash right to you.

What're you waiting for?

You'd be a fool to miss out on all this

FREE MONEY!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#8

From: Danny B.

Subject: (SPAM?) Spread Love.

 

The world needs more love. Love your neighbor, love your family, love your friends, and your enemies. But most of all - love yourself.

If you do not pass this message of love and support on to at least 10 people in the next half hour your mother will die ... and so will all the rabbits.

...and it will be your fault.

...You bastard! I hate you!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#9

From: U.S. State Dept.

Subject: (SPAM?) Everything in America is big!

 

In order to ensure America's supremacy in all areas over the next century, the State Department have secretly employed African Witch Doctors to imbue this email with potent magic.

For every person you forward this email to you will gain and inch in manly stature. For every person who forwards this forwarded email, you will gain an inch in manly girth.

Stand proud and tall with a large bore. Forward this email today, and have fun with the results tonight!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#10

From: Roxy

Subject: (SPAM?) Freedom loves regulation.

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

There are so many viruses on the internet that Government officials have forecast that, unless control is handed over to them, the internet will be dead within a month.

Polls have shown that the majority of people agree that it would be for the greater good if the internet was regulated, censored, and that the public had to pay a mandatory Internet Tax for this service.

What do you think? Click on the links to vote:

YES - More tax for the Gov, less cash for me.

NO - I don't want the internet to die. Tax me!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#11

From: Peter File

Subject: (SPAM?) Sexy girls...

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Sexy girls... and boys!

Young and Tasty! The way YOU like 'em! Follow the links to the fun:

Playground

Schoolyard

Toystore

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#12

From: FlyBoy

Subject: (SPAM?) FLIGHTS!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Wow! FlyU6 have teamed up with the National Office of Security Enforcement to give away free flights to exotic destinations such as Afghanistan, Libya, Iraq, and other so-called rogue states.

To qualify, simply turn up at an airport booked on any of our flights, and who knows - you could be jetting off someplace else, on the flight of your life, all expenses paid.

This opportunity is open to everyone ...and we mean EVERYONE!

Don't delay, book today!

When booking, please note that FlyU6 will not sell-on your private details to criminals, hackers, or terrorists (outside of the US).

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#13

From: Ian Flamed

Subject: (SPAM?) Bonsai children.

 

To anyone with love and respect for life: In Liberty City there is a person who sells bonsai-children.

Sounds like fun huh? NOT!

These kids are squeezed into a bottle.

Their urine and feces are removed through probes and they are fed chemicals to keep their bones soft and flexible so the child grows into the shape of the bottle, where they remain until they die.

Bonsai-children are becoming a fashion in Liberty City and Asia.

Please sign this email then forward it to ALL your friends, in protest against these tortures.

 

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#14

From: Liam B.

Subject: (SPAM?) Invitation.

 

PLEASE FORWARD THIS WARNING AMONG

FRIENDS, FAMILY AND CONTACTS:

If you receive an email entitled "invitation" do not open it! Shut down your computer and RUN screaming from your office!

The virus has been classified as the most SATANIC ever by Facade systems anti-virus dept.

To safely remove it, please call 555-U-SUCKER and sign up for our exclusive anti-viral updates at $35 a week.

Pay for our protection NOW! Or you will be exposed to more viruses ...we promise!

 

NB: It is better to receive this message 252 times (and you will) than to receive the virus and open it.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#15

From: j_nutter08

Subject: (SPAM?) [email protected] social networkers please read.

 

If someone by the name of j_nutter07 wants to add you to their friend list don't accept it.

Warn everyone you know so they can be aware too.

It's not that j_nutter07 is a virus, he's just a nob and I hate him.

PLEASE COPY/PASTE AND REPOST THIS

 

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#16

From: P. Doctor

Subject: (SPAM?) Heart attacks and warm drink.

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, did you know that the cold water will solidify any oily stuff that you have just consumed?

Once this "sludge" reacts with your stomach acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer.

 

After a meal, it is best to drink something warm such as fresh urine.

 

For the freshest urine, visit our website and get healthy piss today, or cancer tomorrow!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#17

From: A. Shrub

Subject: (SPAM?) Enema of the people!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Personal privacy is Public Enemy Number One!

It's time to put an end to it. You only need privacy if you're doing something you want to hide.

Only terrorists need privacy - for making bombs!

 

Click on the links to vote:

YES - I have nothing to hide.

NO - I need to make bombs!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#18

From: Greenboy

Subject: (SPAM?) Warning, Global Warming!

 

Ordinary people are choking the planet with machine vapors! SCIENTISTS have now confirmed that only EVIL can come from commoners thinking, learning, and employing technology.

It's time for the common stock to head back to the caves and leave the elites to enjoy the fruits of science.

Save the world by switching off your computer ... but first, forward this email to everyone you know, SERF.

 

NB: There are no viruses attached to this email - honest.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

BADGER ALERT : VIRUS REMOVED

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#19

From: Mark

Subject: (SPAM?) Beautiful, just beautiful!

 

Great BAWSAQ deals!

 

SHT. INA. HAT. +2

ASS. INA. SLNG. +4

FRT. INA. FCE. -5

HUR+RY c+all y.our B.rok+er Now !!!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#20

From: Toshiko

Subject: (SPAM?) Great day!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Check out this hot babe! All for FREE!

 

Click here to: Unsubscribe from this automated email - and be subscribed to fifteen others.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#21

From: EBankz Pro

Subject: (SPAM?) Sup?

 

Hey mate, check BAWSAQ daily!

This market is Bull.

SHE.ITE.

See all volume, GET IN NOW.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#22

From: Toni C.

Subject: (SPAM?) Yo!

 

Hey mate, BAWSAQ's getting tight.

This is numero uno Winner.

BLL.OXS.

You make a killing ... Really!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#23

From: Miles O.

Subject: (SPAM?) Check this...

 

Hey mate, BAWSAQ is hot right now!

Stock gonna move fast

PMP.N.DMP.

Best one ever. BUY NOW!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#24

From: Issac

Subject: (SPAM?) Too big for mouth?

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Ladies used to laugh at me - even chaps in lavatory giggled. Well now I laugh at them - coz I took 'Kong Di K' for 6 months. Now mine looks like a massive banana!

 

Join the mailing list (and get free anti-jaundice tablets).

Click here and become a true member: Guaranteed inches

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#25

From: Your Bank

Subject: (SPAM?) Thanks, we accept your loan request.

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Dear Sir/Madam.

The personalized loan you didn't request is ready. Click on the link to be taken to the money.

$ THANK YOU $

Our loan terms and interest rates are very fair: Call our overseas offices, and we'll read our terms to you in pidgin English through a rustling plastic bag.

Have a great day!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#26

From: Don

Subject: (SPAM?) financial freedom

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Declare bankruptcy today!

The flop house hasn't been this popular since 1929, so contact us now to reserve one of our piss-stained beds, or expect even greater disappointment later, when all we have left is a share of a park bench with a sex starved bag-lady.

Click the link: Make mine a sipping whiskey in a crumpled brown-paper bag.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#27

From: Uri

Subject: (SPAM?) Naked celebs

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

No girlfriend? Socially inept? Hopeless sexual fantasist? ...We've been looking for you!

Real life girls - who needs that skank when you can have different top-celebrity-girls every night?

Subscribe to CelebrityStalker and blast your sap over 1000's of celebrity chick's faces (roughly spliced onto porn star bodies).

Click the link and see photos of these filthy harlots doing things they should be ashamed of. The cheap sluts!!!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#28

From: Al Garve

Subject: (SPAM?) Become debt Free!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Your children are the cause of your financial misery. If it weren't for your ungrateful brats your life would still be all about having fun, playing games, and goofing around. But, because you've got kids, those times are gone, right? Wrong!

 

* * * We'll take your debts, and the cause of those debts, off your hands!

* * * With us, your children will have the opportunity for travel, and the security of a job for life(+). We have elite, high-flying, customers world-wide who will pay good money for the company and services of your children.

 

That's right! You can become debt free, and your children will literally rub shoulders (and other bodily parts) with stars, royalty, and socialites from all over the world! What are you waiting for?

Click here and be rid of them!(+) At least two weeks, but depends on the proclivities of the client.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#29

From: Nigel

Subject: (SPAM?) IT Training

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Do you aspire to be the deathly-pale, smelly, socially-awkward guy in the office? Do you want to rid yourself of unnecessary diversions like friends, family and girls - forever? Do you dream of spending 16 hours of your day breathlessly listening in on tech-help phone calls? If you do, then the Government and Big Business want you - Lord knows, nobody else does.

 

Yes! Our intensive course will fast-track you across the digital divide to IT fame and fortune. You'll know you've made it when you've convinced yourself that the only reason nobody wants to talk to you is because they're all so in awe of you.

Click here to become the master of your domain today!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#30

From: Jack

Subject: (SPAM?) work from home

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Buy into our franchise and we'll set you up with all you need to beat off men in the privacy of your own home. Who'd have thought that making money could be this easy, or fun? Click the link today and we'll throw in a month's supply of easy-clean-wipes, friction-burn band-aids, and a self help book 'Coping with Spiritual and Moral Desolation'.

 

Click here: Pimp me out

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#31

From: Mr. Satan

Subject: (SPAM?) f--k

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Yes! F--K! Something you've never done. But, don't despair, ease your pent up adolescent frustrations over photos of these questionably-female smack addicts selling their souls for pennies.

 

Betty p--sing in public.

Janine bl-wing nine goats in a row.

Pru eats s--t right out of his a--.

Tula takes a naked d--p in rush hour traffic.

Michel showered in bum's j--z.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#32

From: Illegal teen

Subject: (SPAM?) Over 18?

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Over 18? You don't need to be! Most of the visitors to our website aren't over 18, ***JUST LIKE OUR MODELS***.

Not legal? Of course it is! We wouldn't lie to you where money was concerned. Click the link and sign up for an account today.

 

Browse our girls with the peace of mind that the FIB no longer monitors our site(+).

 

(+)on an hourly basis.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#33

From: Suzie Gaunt

Subject: (SPAM?) financial freedom

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Say goodbye to money worries: Become a prostitute today!

 

Why get f*cked for minimum wage when you can get f*cked for real and get paid more?

As a bonus, you'll be able to list the STD's you'll contract, after your name, like a fancy college professor's letters. That'll impress your friends at hooker dinner parties!

 

Click the link and become an E-Hooker

 

Yours,

Suzie Gaunt VD, Pox, HIV (Hons)

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#34

From: Crink

Subject: (SPAM?) joke-a-day

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Jokes don't have to be funny. Click on the link and be deluged with soul destroying proof on a daily basis: Clown time!

 

To unsubscribe click here: Clown time!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#35

From: Dr. Fun Bags

Subject: (SPAM?) breast enhancement

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

That's right. Your friends really do talk and laugh about you behind your back - because you have no boobs! Shut them up for good. Sign up for augmentation(+) at one of our Mexican border town surgeries and get a rack like a black girl's ass.

 

Click for info: Pump them up!

 

(+)This surgery is also available for women.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#36

From: Vlad

Subject: (SPAM?) Russian virgins

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Not many left! Buy one today, before they are raped by their filthy, drunken brothers.

They do not speak English or have much education, so you can beat them all you like too; they will not know how to inform the police in your country.

 

Buy two, and while one pleasures you, the other can do the cleaning.

Both will love you like you were their father.

 

Check out our Girlskis

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#37

From: Dick

Subject: (SPAM?) You have won!!!!

 

$5,000,000!!!!! You can retire TODAY!!!! YES!! Your name has been selected in a prize draw you didn't enter! You really can get something for nothing! Your money is ready to be sent, NOW!

Just mail us $500 to cover our legal administration costs. Send to BIGPRIZE, Bigprize House, Congrats Boulevard, NV58008.

Checks should be made payable to C.Ash.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#38

From: Dr. Umbeppo

Subject: (SPAM?) Save the children

 

Good day to you,

As I'm sure you are aware, there was recently a terrible earthquake/tsunami/ hurricane/drought (delete where necessary) that extinguished the lives of many, many small children, somewhere in the world.

No caring human being would hesitate to donate as much as they could to relieve the suffering of these blameless children.

On behalf of these poor, poor children, we are ready to accept your donation by MONEY TRANSFER right now to:

Name: Childrenscam.paign

Address: Nigeria

For auditing purposes we will also need your bank details and pin codes.

Yours,

The Children.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#39

From: Bill

Subject: (SPAM?) Good deals, dude

 

BAWSAQ is ready to explode! Grab some of this!

PSS.ONA.TRD. +6

TCH.UPA.BTT. -7

LIK.MYSAC. +4

TCH.MYKOC. +2

JZZ.INA.CUP +3

HU-RRY cal.l y+our Bro+k.er tod.ay!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#40

From: Mr. T. al Iban

Subject: (SPAM?) discount prices

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Worry about global warming, the arms race restarting, war in the middle-east, or the impending military draft? Well, worry no more!

A few armfuls of my country's lethal skag and you won't be around long enough to have to deal with any of that sh*t.

That's right! Log on to our website and have a ton of opiates shipped direct to your home - guaranteed, half the price of your usual dealer.

How come our prices are so good? Simple - we're oversupplied. The war on terror has seen my country's poppy fields flourish, so our prices have tumbled.

Thank you, Mr. President, for bringing capitalism to our country! I kiss your evil mouth!

You have liberated us from our cave dwelling past. I've now retired my camel to my bed and am instead driving an Infernus across the arid plains.

 

Click the link: It's Opi-yummy!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#41

From: Hugh Genics

Subject: (SPAM?) Nazti Porn

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

It's all free! FREEEEEE!!!! Now you can literally beat yourself into oblivion!

Nazti Porn used to advocate the incarceration, sterilization, and gassing of people like you, but no more! All we need now is a website filled with disrobed perfect future Uber-babes to ensure the seed of the genetically inferior only ever gets shot into a crusty tissue.

Thank you for removing yourself from the gene pool and ensuring the future will be pure Nazti.

 

Visit us here: GOODBYE JERKOFF

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#42

From: Securi-tease

Subject: (SPAM?) Identity theft

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Ignore this message and risk waking up tomorrow not knowing who you are: Your identity - stolen!

To ensure that no one steals your identity, send us all your personal information: passport, bank accounts, credit cards, everything. We will put it all into a very big safe, where it will be stored so securely that even you won't be able to access it, ever.

 

So, you're asking:

1. Is this a con?

Answer: No. Trust us. This is no con. We really want your details.

 

2. How do I know I can trust you?

Answer: Our own 'trust ombudsman' has given us his 110% seal of approval. And his opinion is worth every penny we pay him.

 

3. How big is this safe?

Answer: VERY, VERY big.

 

4. Where do I sign up?

Answer: Contact us at our website.

 

Do not tick the box if you don't agree to not allowing us to not pass on your private information to our third party associates. Clicking will confirm the opposite - are you sure you want that? Decide Now!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#43

From: Mentor

Subject: (SPAM?) make money

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Sign up for our counterfeiting course today at the criminal academy. Or try one of our other courses:

 

Crime

From house breaking, mugging, joyriding to serial killing and politics.

 

Interview room techniques

Offsetting blame 101 - 'video games made me do it', etc. all tried, tested and proven.

 

Prison survival techniques

Cell room fengshui, Zen invisibility, How to pick up soap with your toes, Intimidate by smell alone, Advanced rape + many more.

 

Subscribe today and gain access to our course on email fraud - 'How to make $75 from each Spam email you send'.

 

Click on the link: I agree, under oath, I am not a cop - and sign up now, just $75!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#44

From: Friendly

Subject: (SPAM?) Mortgage

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Get on the property ladder. The time to take on the biggest debt in your life is always NOW!

Take it to the hilt with mortgages of 25x your income - GUARANTEED!!!!

 

Get hooked up with a great mortgage deal today, just in time for the property market to collapse, so we can reel you in like a floundering f*ckfish.

 

Come on in, the market's great (for us)! We've got rich investors who want everything you own.

 

Click here for details: More4Us-Less4U

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#45

From: Free

Subject: (SPAM?) Free!

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Free things just a click away! They're FREE! What are you waiting for? It's all free!!

FREE! FREE! FREE! You be crazy to miss out on FREE stuff! Click the link for FREEEEEE: Grannyporn

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#46

From: Smarts

Subject: (SPAM?) Gambling

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

Love to gamble but live in a no-gamble state? Well cyberspace recognizes no jurisdictions! With us you're free to gamble all you like.

Click the link and be taken to our gambling website - or maybe the link will put a virus on your hard-drive... What's it going to be? C'mon, I thought you loved gambling.

Wait ... maybe the link will send your terrorist confession to the FIB, trigger a bomb in your mom's house, or win you a million dollars!!!

Isn't this great!

Click NOW: WhEeLoFfAtE

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#47

From: Lonely guy

Subject: (SPAM?) Find Love, real Love

 

SPAM ALERT: LINKS DISABLED

For so long I was alone. Everyone was finding love, getting married, and having kids. But, for me, there was only emptiness. I wondered if I would ever find someone special to share my life with. I felt like a freak.

 

Then I received an email, like this one, and found love online. I can't believe how happy I am now I've found my soul mate. You too can find the one for you - and remember, you're not alone, you're not a freak.

 

Join us at:

Scat-Lovers

Autumn-Showers

Butt-Munchers

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

#48

From: Jim

Subject: (SPAM?) fwd: fwd: Earn Money!!!

 

*GET A JOB* - DIPsh*t!

 

Forward this email to at least 10 of your welfare friends who also think the world owes them a living, or I will hunt you down and repatriate my tax dollars from your back pocket by reaching down your throat and pulling them up through your ass!

 

 

 

Edited by Respect2

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universetwisters

This is wonderful. I can finally read what I've been wanting to for years but couldn't because why would I buy a game just to read spam emails.

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