GTAO 2016 Los Santos Election! Rock the Vote!¡!

[fw3]

The 2016 US Presidential election is in just two days and it's been an insane ride, so far, with a promise to get even weirder.

So, I thought it might be fun to hold a 2016 Los Santos election to see who might be a worthwhile choice to run the largest urban democracy this side of Liberty City.

If you're game and would like to cast your vote, check out the poll for the candidates. Below are basic descriptions of each and why they might be the candidate of choice to get your support.

Please note, several game characters are not included, like Martin Madrazo (Mexico) and Trevor Phillips (Canadian), as they were not born in country and not eligible to run. Also not included are characters like Franklin and Michael, as they are not part of the online aspect of the game. However, please feel free to add them as the "Write In" candidate, if you feel strongly about their participation.

This is meant purely for fun and to celebrate America's upcoming presidential election.

Looking forward to the results! Cheers!

2016 LOS SANTOS ELECTION CANDIDATES:

Brucie Kibbutz - R

Powerfully confident, wealthy luxury auto import/export entrepreneur, lifestyle coach, fitness guru and outspoken spokesman for Bull Shark Testosterone supplements, Brucie promises to bring his positive enthusiasm and creative drive to the people of Los Santos. His ability to motivate and create strong initiatives will help stimulate the staggering economy and encourage all communities to step up and "stay alpha, bro!"

 

Lester Crest - L

An unlikely candidate, Crest's intolerance for the current administration and the corrupt "business as usual" political system in Los Santos has urged him to run for election, bringing his vast network of partnerships and experience in information technology to his platform. Though not favored by the media, other politicians, or even the people of Los Santos, he is renown for his ability to get the job done and bring about real change where no one else could.

 

 

J.T. Boyd - R

Retired marine who runs the San Andreas Flight School, noted as being a tough advocate on defense issues and offensive with regard to social issues. He believes Los Santos needs a tougher administration with a zero tolerance attitude to get the city back on its feet. And while he shows little remorse for fallen cadets under his watch, he is an avid supporter for those who can climb to the ranks, get the job done, and aspire to greatness.

 

 

Cris Formage - D

Founder and director of the Epsilon Program who promotes the two-egg party system, where the merging of spiritual and political entities can revive the economy, bring globalization to the people, and incite Los Santos to band together in a fellowship of like-minded adults who have "the money to make it happen.”

 

 

Brendon Darcy - I

Former, retired Navy admiral and co-designer of the 2014 Kraken submergible vehicle, owns and operates his Galaxy Yacht Company as a contract yacht captain. A hired consultant for Los Santos military & naval operations consortiums, he believes Los Santos has lost direction and is sailing into uncharted, dangerous territory and that he has the experience to bring the city back to calmer seas.

 

 

Karen Daniels - D

Making her name in Liberty City as an undercover government official, she has smartly risen through the ranks in Los Santos as a legal consultant, lead interrogator for the Internation Affairs Agency, and in her role as a journalism consultant for the United Liberty Paper media outlet, making her a charming and beloved candidate for her positions on women’s rights, the second amendment, and abortion issues.

 

 

Eddie Toh - R

Self-made entrepreneur and celebrated Asian-American business leader, Toh specializes in rare vehicle procurement. Known for his extreme professionalism and skills, he’s among the top rated drivers and pilots in Los Santos, earning respect among enthusiasts, aficionados, and family value proponents. His platform revolves around creating a strong business-minded Los Santos that centers around diversity, entrepreneurial capitalism, and strong work ethics, encouraging CEOs and VIPs to work together to build an epic economy that will be a keen attraction to global commerce.

 

 

Lamar Davis - D

In touch with the common folk of Los Santos, he vows to leverage his vast networking experience in the personal annuities field and bring down the corrupt system that has a stranglehold on the Los Santos community, specifically the LSPD, who he feels has become overwhelming in their role of law enforcement through the "obey and survive" motto and "murder first, ask questions later" philosophy. Despite his convincing and enthusiastic position, his ties to notorious criminal families is something the media has reported, though most of the journalists who have written stories on him seemed to have just moved away.

 

 

Avi Schwartzman - G

Convinced that he can bring the powerful big banks and corporate greed to a halt in Los Santos, he plans to use his unique abilities in the field of information technology to infiltrate the system and override the corrupt entities that have been in place for decades, replacing them with more legitimate resources to benefit the city and all surrounding areas. A renown animal whisperer, the media portrays him as a delusional paranoid; however, his ties to other informational kingpins, like Lester Crest, validate his voice in this election.

 

 

Paige Harris - D

A newcomer to the political landscape, Harris has been steamrolling the issues over other candidates with her bullish stance on ousting the current administration and rebuilding with a fresh new cabinet of ready-to-go professionals. Her career in digital espionage has gained her notoriety in the public eye and the private sector as an up and coming political voice with a sharp awareness of how intel and operations can be used to boost the economy and stimulate growth in Los Santos.

 

 

Gerald G. - D

It's not every person who can rise from the low ranks of poverty and crime and re-create themselves into a thriving, self-made entrepreneur in the medical pharmaceuticals industry, but Gerald has done the unimaginable and brings years of experience in orchestrating small business operations and creating a strong community bond with a keen understanding of the lower income bracket of Los Santos. The media continues to dismiss him as a thug with no place in this election, often citing in bold headlines, "WTF IS A GERALD?"

 

 

Dom Beasley - R

Extremely successful hedge fund manager, he's got the ego and the non-stop competitive drive to lead Los Santos into the next generation. His addictive commitment to high-risk activities and investment approaches is the key to his platform of how to get Los Santos to not only thrive, but go to the highest level of success and prowess in the global market. He vows to generate "sweet new opportunities" that the people of LS can only benefit from under his leadership.

 

 

Sue Murray - D
Former school teacher and extreme liberal ideologist, Murray brings her platform of "knowing what conservatives want" to center stage, pledging to raise taxes to upwards of 74% and bringing a stronger revenue stream to public radio. Her stance on the environment includes banning all plastic containers, tobacco, public prayer, gasoline based vehicles, and firearms, while closing all prisons, nationwide. Murray is leadership you can trust!

 

WRITE IN CANDIDATES:
Feel free to write in any candidate from GTAO that you feel would best represent the people of Los Santos, the business community, and the overall position of the city in the global landscape. Or, that you just really like over any of the above mentioned characters. Or that you think would be funny. Or not. I don't know.

 

 

In all seriousness, this US election is a mess. If eligible, get out and vote and make sure your voice is included! Cheers!

Edited November 6, 2016 by fw3

[REXX]

Karen Daniels FTW! One wrong word at her and that flashlight will be put to work.

[iSaint9]

Vote for Chop, and slap that like button for him as well

[rtie]

Nice thread as usual fw3.

[fw3]

Nice thread as usual fw3.

Thank you, ! Amazing what a bit of coffee, a love of writing, and being up at 5AM on a Sunday will do! LOL!!

[ash-274]

You know that the FIB wouldn't be discovering emails supposedly deleted by Lester.

I'm writing in the woman that Trevor meets in story mode because her stance on getting and keeping physically fit (or you don't deserve to live) would benefit the overall health of the citizens of Los Santos. Yes, she's a tad mentally unstable, but 2016 seems to be a favorable year for that type of candidate.

[Dacelo]

I'm pretty sure Brendon Darcy is Australian.

[DangerZ0neX]

We already have Republican and Democratic nominees for Governor, they're called Jock Cranely and Sue Murry.

 

By the way, make sure to vote for the correct candidate and not the other asshole who's a confirmed drug user and murderer, he'll ruin the state by continuing to let armored vehicles and jets on the loose, and the police will be too poorly funded to do anything about it.

 

Let us change this state for good this time, vote for Sue Murry!

 

Edited November 6, 2016 by DangerZ0neX

[WildBrick142]

I wish Madrazo would be eligible for the election because I feel that he's the only one that will truly take care of the problem that is the Los Santos traffic.

As his business-associate-totally-not-a-mistress says; "Green light! Green light! Martin Madrazo give you green light!"
yes, i know she meant "green light" as in "a hit has been called on you"
He also seems to have a large interest in the Los Santos' briefcase industry, and his assistants are all powerful enough to take on gangs of ex-marines which are a problem in LS. I heard rumors that he wants to make golf the national sport as well. Unfortunately, he's being unfairly accused of criminal activities by multiple judges, lawyers, and witnesses (that in their shame of their acts completely disappear from Los Santos) because they don't want to see change. They want to see people constantly get ran over and killed by impatient drivers.

[EVOLUT7ON]

Brucie Kibbutz! He is so funny, drug-maniac, also a strange character like Trevor, who always hyped from smth xD

Seriously, noone.

[EkaSwede]

Gerald... McReary? Isn't that Packie McReary's older brother who's in jail in LC?

[OBeef619]

LJT cos he keeps an eye on your supplies and lets you know about it before you have your first step in Los Santos. Will constantly nag you into getting the job done or force you to leave the state altogether.

[IceDree]

Excellent & Creative thread like always, fw3!

 

I'm definitely voting for Karen Daniels! She have field experience, not afraid to get her hands dirty, not afraid to cross Red lines to get the job done & she certainly shows leadership skills & the know how to deal with idiots.

 

 

Vote Karen Daniels today!

 

_______

In all seriousness, its a frickin mess, I'm still shocked on how this clusterf*ck went this far!

 

Please go out & vote... The future of the human kind might depend on it

[Yozora]

Donald Love is back. <3

[mute!]

There's something about Karen Daniels I want to stick my tongue and other things down her throat.

[-LN-]

Chop.

 

Obviously Chop is the right choice here; even amongst real life candidates. After all (and no offence to anyone) but aimless barking is exactly what I hear when I am forced to listen to those actually running for office(s) within that certain country on the North American continent say in regards to their views, plans, and the like. At least Chop's barking sort of makes sense.

 

Go, go, Chop!

[Hunter]

Hopefully there aren't any leaked emails linking them to pedophiles and that kind of f*cked up thing.

 

At first I was looking at J.T. Boyd, since he's into aircraft and would probably protect helicopters and their rights. But reading their descriptions and policies ... It's quite tough actually lol. Lamar has some good points on toning down the cops, and that would be great. Lester has the entire mainstream media and establishment against him, which is probably a good sign (since I don't trust them).

 

But, I think we should elect Quinn_flower. She'll make sure LS doesn't get any bad deals regarding clothes, and there'll be a big influx of clothing if we vote for her.

Edited November 6, 2016 by Hunter

[Mach1bud]

Write in for Chop.

[Matrelith]

Vote for Chris Fromage and be one step closer to the 4th paradigm!

Remember: Trees talk, but only some people hear them, people who believe in something live much longer than atheists, and they have eternal life thrown in for good measure and if you believe in Chris Formage and turn your hands and wallet over to Epsilonism, you’ll live a happy life. Otherwise you are doomed!

 

Kifflom, brother-brothers and sister-sisters! Kifflom!

[Zader]

Oh god, we're all gonna die no matter what we pick.

[wizooord]

Well shieeeet i like none of them :c

 

I vote for Captain save a hoe

 

cuz he's savin hoes

[Fireboy769]

Screw all the Candidates! I VOTE MYSELF!

 

A VOTE FOR ME IS A VOTE FOR FREE FLAMETHROWERS!!!!!!!!

FIRE CYCLES!!!!!!!

MODIFIED DUNE BUGGIES ON FIRE!!!!!!

WHITE TRACKSUITS!!!!!!!!

RC CARS!!!!!!$$!!

CONDOMS!!!!!!!!

AND, THE most important thing of all, FREE MONEY......bags. As in, empty bags that you carry cash in.

[A Paradox from 94]

I'd fly anywhere with J.T Boyd.

[fw3]

I'm pretty sure Brendon Darcy is Australian.

He was born in the US but moved to Australia when he was six. He eventually returned to the US and settled into Los Santos back in the 1970s.

It's all public record, you know.

 

Gerald... McReary? Isn't that Packie McReary's older brother who's in jail in LC?

You're right – Gerald in GTAV is actually known as Gerald G. My mistake. Thx!

I updated to reflect.

 

ADDED: Sue Murray (D). Thx @DangerZ0neX

Edited November 6, 2016 by fw3

[Brian Grey]

Hmm I can't decide, they all look tasty. Brucie wouldn't taste so good with the added testosterone which shrinks his balls... Oh wait this is an election not a menu. hahaha

 

Vote Karen Daniels!, I heard she likes to sodomize people .

Edited November 6, 2016 by Jason Grey

[TKDSnovelist]

Donald Trump!

[~Joseph~]

Boyd sounds like tough leadership

[Shadowfennekin]

Jock Cranley gets my vote, sure he's an asshole but he wants to be your asshole.

[GrandTheftPots]

Lester just because he's absolutely insane and a genius

[fw3]

Jock Cranley gets my vote, sure he's an asshole but he wants to be your asshole.

I was going to include him, but didn't think he was really relevant. He's a definite "write in" for sure! LOL! Thx Shadowfennekin!