3,512 Types of GTAO Players

[Kafonix]

I am

 

The Misunderstood Low Level who just hates his characters' looks and starts a new life every month or so.
He is always under level 50 but plays the game since launch. May or may not be better than other low levels.

[Hermes!!]

"The Very Important Prick": A VIP that starts point to point and sets the destination far away from bodyguards and close to themselves, starts Auto Buyout when Infernus'/buses are spawning near them to ensure they win, etc. Essentially just using bodyguards for their own benefit.

[We Are Ninja]

Look, I Have Zentorno!

Typically, a younger player who is supremely impressed with his Zentorno, one of three cars in his garage. The others are an Elegy and an unmodded Futo.

 

This is the funniest thing I've read on GTAF in ages.

[Zerani]

 

Look, I Have Zentorno!

Typically, a younger player who is supremely impressed with his Zentorno, one of three cars in his garage. The others are an Elegy and an unmodded Futo.

This is the funniest thing I've read on GTAF in ages.

 

He forgot to add it's chrome with lime green Dollar wheels and blue neons.

[jdv95]

The blow up idiot: the player who blows up your PV even when Nobody is in them to troll the owner,but then comes On here

Complaining about bad sport and insurance costs. The motorcycle elite:the player who only drives a motorcycle and uses other players cars as a stunting ramp. Also the first to die during a heist because bikes offer no cover and when they crash they lose half their health before getting to the objective. The sexualy aroused: the player who moans when hè/she is at the strip club like the person is getting oral sex while having no idea about their mic being On.

[Horse_With_No_Name]

The Michael:

A veteran player who's grinded his ass off to the point where he doesn't anymore, usuall cars are Z-Types, Luxor Deluxes, Mambas, Toros, and Yatchs.

 

The Trevor:

Usually younger player who just murders npcs and players for the hell of it, and in their prime. They drive zentornos, t20s, jesters, and armored kurumas and schafters.

 

The Franklin:

Usually a lower ranked player (25-75) still learning the ropes and still makes amature mistakes in heists and missions, and will usually place towards the bottom of races and dms.

 

The Ron:

The kind of player who searches the map inside out for Easter eggs and clues. They usually start conspiricy theories and hypothesize about jetpacks and UFOs.

 

The Tracey:

A female charecter (irl) who asks over the mic for sex and points out sexy male charecters. They are usually wearing bikinis, stockings, glitches panties, or blue nipples.

 

The Jimmy:

Usually sits on their ass all day insulting players on the mic so they fell better about their failure of lives. They will typically use generic insults like ni%%er, [email protected], pu$$y, and tranny, until their middle aged father smashes their TV and forces them to bike ride on the beach.

 

The Simeon:

This little troll usually attracts dumbasses over the mic to come to him. He/she will typically use "free money drops" "RP glitch" to even "Super rare hidden cars" to attract people. Then he/she will typically make them perform a ritual of sorts and kills them all.

 

The Dom:

The kind of player who spends most of their time on a bike or parachuting. Mainly filming and doing stunts and jumps for the hell of it or for videos.

 

The Roman:

The kind player (mostly friends) who won't stop bugging you to play with them. They will send invites an messages for every job they do and will call you a bad friend if you don't join. Usually bug you to get in their car and see all their stuff (garages, outfits, yachts, planes).

Edited May 24, 2016 by Horse_With_No_Name

[Mini Madrazo]

The 2pac Shakur *circa 94-early 96*: Everyone that has died and spawned back to life.

[Guy with a Beer]

THE MALDONADO

Like ex Formula One racing namesake, this player is unable to complete a single lap of any race without smashing his car into other cars or nearby scenery. This player can often be found flying inverted through the air above your car heading towards the nearest tree.

 

THE JEDI

Much like a Jedi Knight, this player has a supernatural ability to move a split second before you fire you sniper rifle, not once, not twice, but ever god-damn freaking time, despite the fact they are not even aware that you are targeting them.

 

THE PANZER GENERAL

Only ever travels in an armoured vehicle. Can often be found ramming your unattended muscle car at the heli-pad.

 

THE FUTURAMA

This guy, much like President Nixon in Futurama is a head without a body. Usually has a kick next to their name, a rank of 8000 and a kill death ratio to rival the camp commandant of Auschwitz. Often found near LSC trolling anybody he can find.

 

THE AUTISTIC SERIAL KILLER

This person has the goal of killing every person on the map once.... In alphabetical order.... with a shot gun.... while riding a motor cycle.

 

THE ADAMS APPLE

That player with a female character, often wearing just a bikini, or some other skanky clothing. Sounds very much like a mid 30's male on voice chat.

[Nah nah nah Gta 6]

The Cheapskate

Uses any cheap tactics he can to win, ranging from spamming suicides to RPGs.

 

The Fantastic Four

The VIP group who all work together to try and kill you, but they're all bad so they keep dying.

 

Pogoists

People who still wear the Pogo mask unironically in 2016, harder to come by, they may also wear beach bum tank tops.

 

VIP Grinders

Those wankers who always start VIP jobs before you're about to start one.

 

The Retired

These guys usually stay in their yachts alone, wearing suits and are high leveled, kills low levels with no effort, usually only seen in Heists.

 

The Land Peasants

These are the guys that spawn off your yacht and constantly stalk you on whatever beach they're on with their heavy sniper, they always claim Yachts are useless, but we all know they're just too poor to buy one or too lazy to grind for one.

 

The Se7en Sinner

Loves to do glitches, commonly wearing a Cop Outfit or invisible body parts or playing Crooked Cop or Adversary modes, constantly begs friends to help them out to do 2 person glitches, may or may not be found in Wallbreaches.

Edited May 24, 2016 by Stoney0503

[Guy with a Beer]

THE VULTURE

Sits in high places with a sniper rifle waiting patiently for a kill. Due to an inability to hit a moving target, the Vulture will wait patiently for his prey to be knocked off their feet by a passing car or mugger and claim they kill while they are still down.

 

MH370 PILOT

Like those on the doomed Malaysian Airlines flight, this player is found in an aircraft off the radar that will crash before it reaches its destination.

[lll-H-I-M-lll]

The carebear : That low rank player that wants to be your friend no matter what,no matter how much you kill them in many different ways and blow their P.V up they want to be by your side

 

The barbarian : A low ranking force not to mess with they will fearlessly attack a tank or an army of them and anything else that wants war just with a melee weapon!

Even their own reflection is not safe from conan rage

Edited May 24, 2016 by HARBUJAHN THE GREATEST

[Mr_Zombly]

The c*nt:

lvl 8000 roaming around in a hydra in a full session who decides to fly all the way out to Blayne County to f*ck with some people on a bike ride, often crashes their jet quite early and then goes into full sweat mode, they spawn in full body armor with the bp helmet and start wildly firing into the group of friends trying to enjoy the view, constantly rolling and whippity wooping from side to side, auto aim snapping with a combat mg or spamming a marksman, usually has a short attention span and will f*ck off, either to return with a hydra or to go clean the sweat and grease off of their controller.

 

The guy with the cool gamertag that you decide you wont' kill:

Will be a little wary of you but is often calmed down by a nice text, won't shoot you down if you fly past etc.

Edited May 24, 2016 by Mr_Zombly

[LieutenantLoserz]

The Boogaddi: kid who calls the Adder Bugatti but put too much emphasis on the Bu part and uses d instead of the, you've met them and didn't realize it cause you probably either spawn killed them or muted them, or both

 

The Wasp: the person you don't f*ck with, they won't mess with you, they may even flee from you, but once you kill them,they turn into the Navy Seal AND Apex Predator, and will spawn kill you

 

The Kamikaze: Person who bomb dives into you with a plane to attempt to kill you

 

The Prankster: guy who pretends to be a hacker just to pull a prank on whoever believes him, usually killing them

 

The A-10 Warthog: guy who constantly calls airstrikes

 

The Homing Hero: Guy who can easily evade Homing missiles, via jet or helicopter

 

The P.I.T: the guy in races who put maneuvers, causing you to spin out

[Yozora]

Im rich, work for me:

 

A vip who usually only attempts to hire people with the highest K/D in the lobby.

[fw3]

holy moley! i am laughing out loud at these! @Horse_With_No_Name, I fear I may have a little of each of them in me! Funny!

@Guy with a Beer, omg that's hysterical! THE AUTISTIC SERIAL KILLER! lmao!!

And @Stoney0503, those are all funny because they're so freaking accurate! lol!

, two words says it all: care bear. LMAO!!!
It's kind of a cross between the "Annoying Passive Follower" and the "Beeping Tom," only softer and more cuddlier... and likely giggles, too!

, I put a request to do only, like, 1-5 replies, but you have clearly owned this thread with some brilliant replies! holy crappoli are those funny!!! "Hey, you wanna come to my garage and see my BOOgati?" LOL!!

Oh, and last night I encountered The Inglorious Basterds, a group of random players under level 200, with one mission in mind: kill me!

Yeah, 7-8 of them and couldn't fight straight-up. They used RPGs, siege tactics, shooting at me while I fought the law (and the law won), and call in for tanks. Not one, not two, but three tanks.

It was actually fun for about ten minutes, but then got annoying.

So, I laid a bunch of Proximity Mines around the area and just got on a rooftop on my motorcycle (yes, I'm a Rolling Grasshopper, someone who runs around the lobby jumping over and onto everything on his Bati or Ruffian... also known as a @Furry_Monkey. lol!).

Hilarity ensued, watching each of them go "pop" running across well-place prox. mines trying to get to me! lol!

Cheers all and thx for the chuckles!

Edited May 24, 2016 by fw3

[Hunter]

Yeah, 7-8 of them and couldn't fight straight-up. They used RPGs, siege tactics, shooting at me while I fought the law (and the law won), and call in for tanks. Not one, not two, but three tanks.

I would've shown up in my Savage as air support. That thing's a tank-killer.

[jabloki]

The Almost-Lost-All-Belief-Towards-GTAO - This player logs into GTAO maybe once a day and maybe five times a week, not that this was always the case, but game has gotten bland and refershing the forum topic, which is directed to the new DLC, is the main thing to do.

[Guy with a Beer]

MOHAMMAD AL-FARQU

This guy, often Arabic can been found on the voice chat where he share his command of the English language at every opportunity. He will answer ever kill, death, voice he hears and text he recieves with the only two words of Englush he knows. [email protected] You.

Edited May 24, 2016 by Guy with a Beer

[Zerani]

The Kim

 

These people usually crowd NA lobbies, they turn their mics up very loud and only speak Korean, and usually sound like 12 year old girls.

[El Dorado]

The black and pink zentornos are one of the reasons I never take GTA Online seriously.

That's lead me to my play style: What the hell is going on here?

A novice player who don't fully understand the mechanics of the game and then was vaporized by a jet plane out of the blue just to further his confusion.

[hyperspeed980]

The Mission Griefer: Someone who joins missions or heists for the sole purpose of continuously failing them.

The Careless Buyer: Someone who buys all the new lowriders and the highest-end yacht, then complains that they're not as good as they hoped.

The Crusher: Someone who drives a tall heavy vehicle like a Sandking or Insurgent, who loves to drive over other vehicles or smash into them.

The Misjudged Elite: Someone who is actually very good at GTAO and has a lot of experience at it, but due to having a low level character, is treated like a newbie.

The Armoured Bomber: Someone who puts a sticky bomb on the front of their Insurgent, then drives into another player and detonates the bomb.

Edited May 24, 2016 by hyperspeed980

[Tonguegirl]

 

The Armoured Bomber: Someone who puts a sticky bomb on the front of their Insurgent, then drives into another player and detonates the bomb.

 

Is that not what the grille is for? Lol. It's a great way to collect bounties and destroy Kurumas.

[Arachne]

The Ghost Motherf*cker:

 

The one who only attacks while off-radar

 

The Flying sh*t:

 

Loves airplanes

 

The Hardcore Nigga:

 

The one who calls you a sucker, even though he doesn't know how to play the game

Edited May 24, 2016 by Arachne

[GrandTheftPots]

The free loader: That guy who joins missions and doesn't do anything or drives to airport and waits for the 6 bags on Los Santos Connection

 

Btw that guy is me hahaha

[fw3]

The free loader: That guy who joins missions and doesn't do anything or drives to airport and waits for the 6 bags on Los Santos Connection

 

Btw that guy is me hahaha

ugh. I know that guy. lol!

 

This is also the same player who will only kill one enemy in a Survival - just enough to stay in it - and then run around and collect the armor and health before anyone else.

Also known as a few expletive words, as well.

 

 

[ash-274]

I'm loving this thread.

 

The wolf in sheep's clothing

The <Rank-40 player that you're either happy to be pitted against or dread that they're on your team/crew, only to discover that they possess not only the fiscal means to own top-tier weapons but the fighting tactics and situational skills to contend with veteran players.

[Dangerous and sad]

3,512 types of GTAO Players ... And I can barely get a session with more than 3 other people.

 

On topic:

 

The Helicopter guy/girl:

 

Loves helicopters, has many hundreds of hours of flight time in them, to perfect his or her low-altitude flying. Has become pretty efficient at hiding behind buildings and killing stuff, but he/she feels nauseous at the sight of the homing launcher, and often feels a strong urge to say "Mmmmm, *insert helicopter name here*". May or may not be helisexual.

 

The Chihuahua:

 

Resides in Rockstar's handbag, viciously barking and biting at anyone who dares to criticize his/her master.

 

The disgruntled one:

 

Generally has played the game for a long time, and has become bored and disillusioned. His or her feelings may be exaggerated by a lack of new missions, game balance, etc. May or may not refer to Rockstar as C*ckstar.

A moment of silence for both Shadowoperative and Xeonxx.

[MCMXCII]

Off topic: Who was Xeonxx? I know who that other kid was but I don't remember seeing this Xeonxx kid.

 

On topic:

 

The Youtube Fanatic

 

 

This person is often dressed as his/her favorite Youtuber(s). They are typically underage children and tend to become fodder for everyone in the lobby.

Edited May 24, 2016 by jrl51592

[Mr_Zombly]

The Youtube Fanatic

 

 

This person is often dressed as his/her favorite Youtuber(s). They are typically underage children and tend to become fodder for everyone in the lobby.

Let me expand

 

Also tries to crack jokes and do all the things that their favourite youtubers have said or done resulting in it being unfunny and sad to watch/hear.

[Dangerous and sad]

Off topic: Who was Xeonxx? I know who that other kid was but I don't remember seeing this Xeonxx kid.

On topic:The Youtube FanaticThis person is often dressed as his/her favorite Youtuber(s). They are typically underage children and tend to become fodder for everyone in the lobby.

All you need to see is this famous quote by him in the V section. "GTA V is a flawless game with flaws". Felt sorry for this section having to put up with his sh*t.