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An interesting theory for discussion . . . we're all dead!


Pentalarc
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Been thinking about this recently, and it's a lot more interesting/fun than the constant back-and-forth about oldgen/currentgen/nextgen/regen/somebody's cousin Jen that we're having right now.

 

Yeah, we're all dead, or more accurately, our online characters are dead. But it's not that bad we're in Valhalla.

 

Think about it. We engage in constant combat for pleasure. When we die, we immediately rise from the dead to continue fighting. The only foods available are foods of pleasure (candy) which heals us, and beer.

 

The Norse had a concept for this: Valhalla (and Hjathningavig, which people tend to refer to Valhalla instead because . . . well because it's much easier to spell. . .) The GTA Online world is a modern updating of Valhalla, because after all, today's high-end criminals would be unlikely to see the afterlife of that type in the old sword and shield form.

 

Think about it. We are a high-end criminal who dies committing some crime. Violent crime is our life (thus, the modern equivalent, in some ways, of a warrior) and if our characters died while committing a crime, we essentially "Died in battle."

 

So, what happens then? Well:

 

We fly in to a new place (Los Santos) on a plane (modern equivalent of a Valkyrie).

 

Once we get there, we cannot leave (Once one enters the underworld, they cannot return (easily at least) to the land of the living.

 

We are greeted by a Lamar, essentially a psychopomp, who gives us a gun. (The modern equivalent of a sword). And immediately challenges us to a contest (a race, quite common challenge actually among the Norse.)

 

Note, that other characters "arriving" can be seen on the plane, the same way the Valkyries bring the honored dead in groups.

 

We join the legions of more powerful warriors already there. (The gods of war and the like in our background)

 

Much of the music available (on the radio) is about crime, fighting, the spoils of war, i.e. about war and combat, the equivalent of the sagas of the skalds. Much of the rest is about pleasure, love, wealth, and the rest, also skaldic topic.

 

The only food and drink is that which gives us pleasure, and we do not technically need it to survive, i.e. we consume things only to heal us or give us pleasure.

 

We do not age. Our characters remain the age they were when they arrived in Los Santos, i.e. when they died as mortals.

 

Not only do we rise immediately upon dying to continue the combat, but can engage in the same battles over and over again (redoing missions, heists, jobs, etc) to hone our skills. (To prepare, one day for the GTA equivalent of Ragnarok?)

 

And the major NPC's from SP and Online? They have equivalents in deities of cultures throughout history, all over the world, not just the Norse.

 

Lamar: Psychopomp, he who welcomes and guides the dead. Informs us of direct combat.

 

Cris Frommage: Another psychopomp, but one who appears later, and informs us of indirect action (passive mode, "observing") andt he nature of the realm. I.e. A trickster deity, god of spies, knowledge, and trickery.

 

Gerald: The silent, serious deity. Is normally referred to only by a nickname (G), and constantly tells us not to tell others about him. In other words, a chthonic mystery deity.

 

Simeon: Makes contracts for his own benefit, deals in hot cars. In other words the equivalent of the god of theives.

 

Martin Madrazzo: God of wealth and rulership (direct leader of a large cartel) and, because coldly orders the death of others stating it is "the way," god of death.

 

Agent 14: Another cthonic deities of secrets known only by a nickname.

 

and others, and of course:

 

Lester: The wise, crippled god, who like many deities in pagan religions, has great wisdom, knowledge, and mental/mystic power (computers and hacking being the modern equivalent of magic in this background, since it is in actuality a giant computer the characters are in (yeah, real meta) thus, as a hacker, Lester has the ability to "change the 'world'", has gotten these powers in exchange for a physical defect. (His disease, which has "broken his body but sharpened his mind.") He is also the connection between these deities and the unseen "greater" deities.

 

So who are these unseen ones?

 

Well . . . we meet them in single player.

 

Michael: Michael died and was reborn into a wealthy but hidden form like many old agricultural deities. Other characters constantly say that he died. He died as Michael Townley, and arose as Michael DeSanta (i.e. Michael 'the Holy One") He commands his legions, and attained wisdom through his death and rebirth. He is the god of command, death and rebirth, wealth, and the like. He lives for rulership and power.

 

Franklin: The young god of competition, testing, and the like. His story is one of attaining elightenment and godhood through the elder deities. He leaves his home, enters the wilderness, and attains power, getting castle-like hall. He lives for self-improvement and action.

 

Trevor: Our favorite dig at us causers of chaos, is the god of chaos, war, battle rage, and death. He dwells in the land of the dead (A harsh place, where no normal plants grow, where the water is poisonous (and caustic, i.e. like fire) He controls a substance which gives he and his allies power, but destroys his enemies. He is the only one we meet (and only when we are worthy) online. He commands his legions all of which have partaken of his transformative substance and survived.

 

So what happens when we reach the final rank, and can advance no more?

 

Well, then we become one of the Greater Ones, worthy to stand alongside them and fight in the final Twilight of the Gods.

 

A dark place and a dark bunch of deities sure, but what else would be the destination for violent criminals who died plying their trade?

 

So the bad news is, we're dead. The good news is, we're in Valhalla.

 

Upon high places
With their heads up high
With their lives at stake
With their blades at hand
Triumph come - beyond the gate
Giants rise - from the pits
Worlds collide - chaos reign
Dawn of gold - age of gods

Satyricon -- "K.I.N.G."

 

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Absolutely outstanding OP.

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what the heck are u smoking....

 

well we did went to heaven that one time...is this hell?

Edited by Quinn_flower
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thanks OP!

thoroughly enjoyable read.

 

i have often related my character to the hindu god shiva for a number of reasons, but youve gone and done an excellent job with the norse-connection.

 

i tip my bong to you!

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Fantastic thread OP! Too bad it'll be largely ignored by the console war bitter argument threads.

 

I like the idea this is a realm of constant battle/rewards. Makes sense since we all love on an island surrounded by nothingness/water. Unless the Gods of Yankton, LC, Venturas and Vice City wish to hold a tournament opening their gates to us fallen warriors (GTA6 and other future games).

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Gaming gave me a new outlook on the meaning of life and death. I believe in reincarnation now. I believe we rack up credit points each incarnation . Yes, we may lose all our intellect and memory, but we don't lose love and good deeds, Those are cashed in for the next life time. Its the only explanation why some are so well off and have all the luck regardless of how well they use it in this life,, while others get near nothing out of this life. We all have to rack up credits, points and turn it in when we expire so we can have a better go at it, next time around.


And yes, I also believe in another possibily that were already in hell. Some are in maximum security struggle and others are in minimum security 1st world. We are given comforts to make our sentencing here as pleasurable as possible which includes video games, lol

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Best use of my break time this year...

Also, what TWOGUN said... Pass dat sh*t..

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Mainthreadrule.gif
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I guess that the all the loading screens in the clouds would thus indeed be purgatory/limbo/etc, as I had long suspected

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A fresh f*cking take on this. Brilliant. Ludicrous, sure, but f*cking stellar concept none the less.

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When you first make a character you are alive. After your first death you go to the afterlife and meet the Epsilon guy. He then sends you back as undead where you jump from quantum reality to another.

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I've got nothing intelligent to contribute so I'll just drool and stick this here.

The-less-you-study.jpg

 

Seems appropriate......

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