Dumbest things you've heard non car people say

[MyName'sJeff]

A mate of mine thought an Audi was called Aldi. Wouldn't be surprised if he went to the supermarket to buy one

[*MURDOC*]

My f*cking dad always pronounces stuff weird, he calls them Awdy.

[Cudwieser]

 

 

 

Calling every supercar a Ferrari.

 

Or Lamborghini.

 

 

Usually if it's red, they'll just say Ferrari regardless.

 

 

I hope it is not just any red car. I prefer to think of mine as a Citroën.

 

 

 

Well, he did say supercar.

 

If someone mistakes your Citroën for a Ferrari, it's your duty to run them over with it.

 

 

 

 

Have to say it. The Citroen or the Ferrari?

 

Or reach out the window and clothesline them.

 

You'd just breake your arm. Best use the door.

 

Well, for a lot of people that's true lol.

 

 

They shouldn't be really driving anything though.

 

Too true. RWD and FWD will behave in a similar fashion unless you do something foolish and provoke them into doing something they don't want to do. In normal driving the same basic ettiquette applies. SLOW DOWN.

 

 

 

Pardon me for knocking the topic onto a parallel, but the amount of stories I hear of both drivers and non-drivers 'breaking' things is incredible, especially when driving like or with a lunatic. It is amazing how strong we get when sh*tting ourselves

 

Just remember

 

 

[sivispacem]

RWD and FWD will behave in a similar fashion unless you do something foolish and provoke them into doing something they don't want to do.

Er, not sure about this here. They're fundamentally very different beasts in their behaviour well inside the limits of grip, though it's not for a lack of trying amongst certain marques (BMW, I'm looking at you) to try and make one feel like the other.

 

Also, the notion of provoking them "to do something they don't want to do" really doesn't ring true either. The propensity for FWD to understeer and RWD to oversteer on the limit is simple physics- it's naturally exactly what the car wants to do given those circumstances. Whether or not the driver is capable of responding to or using that inate tendency is a separate issue entirely.

[Cudwieser]

 

RWD and FWD will behave in a similar fashion unless you do something foolish and provoke them into doing something they don't want to do.

Er, not sure about this here. They're fundamentally very different beasts in their behaviour well inside the limits of grip, though it's not for a lack of trying amongst certain marques (BMW, I'm looking at you) to try and make one feel like the other.

 

Also, the notion of provoking them "to do something they don't want to do" really doesn't ring true either. The propensity for FWD to understeer and RWD to oversteer on the limit is simple physics- it's naturally exactly what the car wants to do given those circumstances. Whether or not the driver is capable of responding to or using that inate tendency is a separate issue entirely.

 

 

 

RWD and FWD will behave in a similar fashion unless you do something foolish and provoke them into doing something they don't want to do.

Er, not sure about this here. They're fundamentally very different beasts in their behaviour well inside the limits of grip, though it's not for a lack of trying amongst certain marques (BMW, I'm looking at you) to try and make one feel like the other.

 

Also, the notion of provoking them "to do something they don't want to do" really doesn't ring true either. The propensity for FWD to understeer and RWD to oversteer on the limit is simple physics- it's naturally exactly what the car wants to do given those circumstances. Whether or not the driver is capable of responding to or using that inate tendency is a separate issue entirely.

 

I beg to differ. While the fundemental of the argument is grip and it cannot be denied that when driving a car it is grip that will determine how a car responds and reacts to various forces put on or through the car. However the natural behaviour of a mass in motion is to continue in a straight line when grip (friction) is no longer a force or is a less influencial force. If a driver is going too hard into a turn, a car with full grip front and rear will describe a wider arc than the turn. If grip is removed (usually at the front due to greater braking effort at the front) then the car will continue in a straight line from the moment grip is gone.

 

In both instances understeer has occurred. To counter both (be it FWD or RWD) is to ease of the brakes or accellerator (no sudden movements), while keeping the same turn on the steering wheel so that grip can be regained.

 

 

The Difference in RWD and FWD occur at their respective limits of grip and where the accelerative force is applied to the car. In FWD cars the force is drawing the car. When steering the driven wheels try to force the front of the car through a turn as well as moving the car forward. This puts more force through the front wheels than RWD cars and since loss of grip to the front causes Understeer it is the natural tendency of FWD to understeer.

 

RWD has shared force front and rear. The front forces the car through the turn, while the rear pushes the car. This should give RWD a relatively neutral handling and will allow greater forces through each tyre before the limit is reached. Once the limit is reached the car tends to wash out as well unless the rear wheels become overwhelmed. If the rear wheels break traction both FWD and RWD can spin. FWD is corrected by power and forcing the front straight but RWD is trickier as it is possible to over accelerate the rears and cause a lose of traction. Unless you can modulate the power the spin will increase in pace. The best course of action is to simply slow down and let the natural grip and friction of the tyres contol the car.

 

 

Things like lift off oversteer are dynamic quirks of particular cars.

[*MURDOC*]

All I was trying to say is that FWD is a lot more forgiving in most peoples everyday driving.

[sivispacem]

If a driver is going too hard into a turn, a car with full grip front and rear will describe a wider arc than the turn. If grip is removed (usually at the front due to greater braking effort at the front) then the car will continue in a straight line from the moment grip is gone.

Typically in a FWD or AWD configuration, yes. But the same basic principles produce the inverse effect in RWD vehicles. As there's no driving force through the rear wheels on a FWD car the threshold for loss of grip is higher, all else being equal (only horizontal, and vertical forces). The same is nor true of RWD and it is the loss of effective grip at the rear before the front which results in the "pendulum" motion which is actually the rear attempting to continue on the same trajectory it was at when grip was lost. The fact both sets of wheels experience forces which are both independent and interdependent is what defines the basic behaviour.

 

In both instances understeer has occurred.

 

Well no, not really. It's only really understeer if the grip is lost at the front end first. That's where car companies programme a degree of inate understeer tendency into RWD vehicles because pre-limit behaviour tends to be unaffected and on-limit understeer is both easier for a novice driver to identify and address. If the rear loses grip first, it's not understeer.

 

To counter both (be it FWD or RWD) is to ease of the brakes or accellerator (no sudden movements), while keeping the same turn on the steering wheel so that grip can be regained.

Lifting off is actively dangerous in many RWD configurations and circumstances. Lifting of at all mid-corner when on power can create enough forward weight transfer to unbalance and spin the car. Mid corner oversteer or understeer in an RWD car when on throttle should be addressed with additional steering input and no throttle or brake movement at all.

 

RWD has shared force front and rear. The front forces the car through the turn, while the rear pushes the car. This should give RWD a relatively neutral handling and will allow greater forces through each tyre before the limit is reached.

In theory, yes, but this ignores the fact that drive forces through the rear wheels are typically several orders of magnitude higher than those created by steering input at the front. It also doesn't account for weight differential as FWD cars will always have their centre of mass far forward enough to primarily affect the driven wheels whereas most RWD vehicles are still front heavy and therefore have less theoretical static grip attributable to fixed mass above the driven wheels, though the weight/momentum transfer actually increases grip during acceleration.

 

Things like lift off oversteer are dynamic quirks of particular cars.

Yes, but lift-off oversteer in FWD vehicles is an entirely different ballgame. It's effectively the inverse of both power oversteer and power understeer as it is the reduction in forward momentum and unloading of the non-driven wheels which causes it. It typically affects MacPherson strut and Beam Axle designs where management of force is more limited than independent suspension designs, and is therefore vehicle dependent. Weight also plays a factor but most FWD vehicles which lift off oversteer have been set up purposefully to do so.

 

All RWD vehicles will exhibit some tendency to oversteer when lifting off for exactly the same reasons, this has nothing to do with the particular vehicle but is a simple fact of physics. Transfer of mass away from the driven rear effectively lightens it, reducing grip, and there will become a point where momentum overcomes grip hence oversteer.

[Ishbo_123]

The day a kid who was 15 asked me what an engine block did, *multiple facepalms occurred*

[Cudwieser]

@ Sivispaceman

 

I will agree with some of what you said a couple of points need clarification.

 

I admit I overlooked weight transfer (it was late), but in regular driving with in speed limits both RWD and FWD tend to display similar character with little discernable difference. When pushing on in a corner the FWD will tend to understeer quicker than RWD which will describe a more neutral course (AWD is a happy medium). When braking (in an emergency) the greater force goes to the front giving the front a greater tendancy to lock (although anti lock controls this). This willl through the weight forward and make the rear more lively, but id grip has already been lost at the front the car will still follow the path of least resistance. As the steering effect has been lost the car will continue forward.

 

In order to create oversteer there has to be a meeting of many forces. While possible in a panic, It is rare when driving normally (as you should be in control of each). To get a RWD to spin you need to be sharp (without locking) on the brakes, and quick on the acclerator while turning (a practice that you are trained not to do).

 

On the point of lift off I was instructed to ease off and maintain steering angle (I have heard to counter steer, but not from my instructor). I will agree counter steer is more intuitive, but I also agree that you should ease off the gas if a car is running wide or about to spin. I think there was confusion on the degree of input.

 

 

Sorry for any confusion, but it seems that for any universal instruction there will always be differnces in understanding and teaching. In anycase I hope we can agree that when there is a speed limit we stick to it and no one overdrives a toyota MR2 thinking it's a Ferrari

Edited August 31, 2015 by Cudwieser

[PhillBellic]

A mate of mine thought an Audi was called Aldi. Wouldn't be surprised if he went to the supermarket to buy one

Well, for me, Aldi rolls off the Tongue easier than Audi. That's just me.

[sivispacem]

In regular driving with in speed limits both RWD and FWD tend to display similar character with little discernable difference.

Generally yes, you are correct. As is most of the rest of this bit, I don't really see much to disagree with aside from a bit of the phrasing.

 

To get a RWD to spin you need to be sharp (without locking) on the brakes, and quick on the acclerator while turning (a practice that you are trained not to do).

This isn't always the case though. You can spin a RWD without aggressive inputs. I have done on more than one occasion, simply by virtue of carrying too much speed into a corner. In fact, one of those spins was because I eased off

 

On the point of lift off I was instructed to ease off and maintain steering angle (I have heard to counter steer, but not from my instructor).

That's what Roadcraft (that's the UK police pursuit driving handbook) teaches, but most advanced driving instructors I've ever met suggest that this is one area in which it's outright wrong. It's certainly bitten me in the arse on the track, and my instructor specifically mentioned that under those aforementioned circumstances (damp track, RWD 3 series with ABS and stability control disabled) countersteer and maintain throttle.

[Cudwieser]

 

In regular driving with in speed limits both RWD and FWD tend to display similar character with little discernable difference.

Generally yes, you are correct. As is most of the rest of this bit, I don't really see much to disagree with aside from a bit of the phrasing.

 

To get a RWD to spin you need to be sharp (without locking) on the brakes, and quick on the acclerator while turning (a practice that you are trained not to do).

This isn't always the case though. You can spin a RWD without aggressive inputs. I have done on more than one occasion, simply by virtue of carrying too much speed into a corner. In fact, one of those spins was because I eased off

 

On the point of lift off I was instructed to ease off and maintain steering angle (I have heard to counter steer, but not from my instructor).

That's what Roadcraft (that's the UK police pursuit driving handbook) teaches, but most advanced driving instructors I've ever met suggest that this is one area in which it's outright wrong. It's certainly bitten me in the arse on the track, and my instructor specifically mentioned that under those aforementioned circumstances (damp track, RWD 3 series with ABS and stability control disabled) countersteer and maintain throttle.

 

Fair do's. That is one thing all UK instructors should be allowed to do as well as testers. The amount of Aerodromes around the country going to little or no use there is plenty of places to bring cars too and beyond limits to instruct how to react. Hell Bishops Court near me holds track days and drift/stock car races (no demolishion). It would take little expense to try things for oneself.

 

I'm sure if you pay the man at the gate to turn a blind eye and don't act the twit you can improve your skills somewhat.

 

Here is a pic of the track for some info

 

http://bishopscourt.org/TheCircuit.aspx

 

[*MURDOC*]

Momentum can do a lot more than people think.

[GTA-Biker]

I´ve heard from one guy how while he was riding a motorcycle some woman in a car cut him off and almost made him crash.He said that when he caught up with her and told her that she almost killed him and that she should have let him pass first,she was confused because she thought that who ever has the larger vehicle should have the right of way and that she should pass first because her car was larger than his bike.I honestly have no idea how that chick got her driving license.

[Cudwieser]

I´ve heard from one guy how while he was riding a motorcycle some woman in a car cut him off and almost made him crash.He said that when he caught up with her and told her that she almost killed him and that she should have let him pass first,she was confused because she thought that who ever has the larger vehicle should have the right of way and that she should pass first because her car was larger than his bike.I honestly have no idea how that chick got her driving license.

Was she Indian? (Bear with me) In India it is a very common belief that Might is Right. Given the chaos that are Indian sub-continent traffic laws, add religious beliefs, the basic rule of survival as a road user (note I didn't use driver) is that whatever can do greatest physical damage to a single person is given right off way. I wouldn't be surprised if similar beliefs are brought across the world (there are sizable displaced Indian populations in nearly every country).

[GTA-Biker]

 

I´ve heard from one guy how while he was riding a motorcycle some woman in a car cut him off and almost made him crash.He said that when he caught up with her and told her that she almost killed him and that she should have let him pass first,she was confused because she thought that who ever has the larger vehicle should have the right of way and that she should pass first because her car was larger than his bike.I honestly have no idea how that chick got her driving license.

Was she Indian? (Bear with me) In India it is a very common belief that Might is Right. Given the chaos that are Indian sub-continent traffic laws, add religious beliefs, the basic rule of survival as a road user (note I didn't use driver) is that whatever can do greatest physical damage to a single person is given right off way. I wouldn't be surprised if similar beliefs are brought across the world (there are sizable displaced Indian populations in nearly every country).

 

Nope,she wasn´t Indian,it happened here in Croatia.The guy said she was an older woman,so either it was easier to get a license a few decades ago (back then there probably wasn´t as many vehicles on the roads here or maybe the driving test was easier to pass),or she was just dumb and forgot the traffic rules.Nowdays the driving tests here are strict and there´s lots of vehicles on the roads,so somebody who doesn´t know the right of way would have no chance of getting a license,that person would be a danger for public safety.

[Cudwieser]

UK is tightening up but has a long way to go. Even at that you get an ingrained arrogence. I've often heard in conversation between young and/or confident drivers (sometimes on a bus of all places) saying "...Sure they'll just need to look out for me."

 

I always thought you needed to drive of yourself and others, not just everyone else.

[Adrenalist]

"I'll just jump in the back seat!"

 

-said by 6'4" man about to get in a 911

[Svip]

I once got in the backseat of a 928. That was tight. But still more room than a 911.

[Adrenalist]

I once got in the backseat of a 928. That was tight. But still more room than a 911.

This made me LOL, Svip.

 

Definitely not as tunnel hugging, but I salute you for your deprivation or inclination.

 

I'm sure your perception of the car getting in changed by the time you got out.

[Svip]

Don't get me wrong, I like a 928. Even a 944. Hell, there's a 944 parked near where I live, see it every day I go to work.

[slimeball supreme]

I'm not a car person, but I heard this bullsh*t once;

 

"Wow, that Chrysler looks just like a Bentley!"

Oh god my brain hurt.

[Cudwieser]

If you can tell us what Chysler was it?

[Cudwieser]

Sorrry for the double post. If someone can reccommend a good pop up blocker and spam bot (free of course) please PM me as the banners, pop ups and spasming is driving me nuts.

Edited September 5, 2015 by Cudwieser

[Adrenalist]

Don't get me wrong, I like a 928. Even a 944. Hell, there's a 944 parked near where I live, see it every day I go to work.

Not getting you wrong in the slightest.

 

I've some love for the 928 and 944, too, despite their flaws.

[Input]

(A dipsh*t from my high school talking about my '79 Firebird)

"No it's not a muscle car, its a roadster."

 

Me:

[Itzik_Maflitzik]

People calling the Toyota 2000GT a Ferrari

[Lakitu]

People who want a Prius.

[Ocelot]

My mum saying that a Ford Scorpio mk.2 looked like a new car...

Edited October 7, 2015 by Ocelot.

[epoxi]

Read this and it reminds me of the wannabes that occasionally slip into the Post a pic of your car topic:

 

 

It was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Jessica. She is really damn hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Jessica called me and said she wanted me to **** her. So be it.

I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferraris have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my dick. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my dick. Booya.

 

Flash forward 10 minutes later. My 30 inch dick is going inside of her VAGINA, hitting them walls. I'm holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I'm ****ing her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says "harder." V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my dick. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn't disagree with them.

 

I throw her a towel so she can clean herself up then I do a triple backflip into my Maserati and drive home

Edited October 7, 2015 by epoxi