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Easy level grind

Recommended Posts


Get in your helicopter.


(or steal it, you dirty criminal)


Once you're in your helicopter, fly to the military base and get four stars for flying over (Common misconception: The reason you get stars for flying over is not because it's a secure military installation, it's because the sign at the gate says "no girls allowed" and they know you're a little bitch). Then head straight for the prison. You're good at going to prison, aren't you? That's f*cking right. Worthless criminal scum.


If you're successful at evading the police helicopters, (and unless your piloting skills are on par with that of Hellen Keller, it's not hard to do) in the amount of time it takes you to get to the prison, your wanted stars will disappear and you'll earn your precious f*cking 400RP for evading them. Woopty doo.


The prison will also give you four stars for flying over, although it takes a minute before they get pissy and actually slap you with the stars. When you get your four freedom stars, fly to the military base. Yeah, that's f*cking right. Fly back there again. Don't bitch. Again, in the amount of time it takes you to get there, your stars will disappear and you'll be rewarded.


Rinse and repeat.


If you are not confident in your flying abilities, (and who can blame you, you f*cking suck) you can also try this alternate method, although it takes quite a bit longer, and costs you a lot in ammo (but if money isn't a problem, and I suspect it isn't, you devious criminal mastermind, this wont be either).


Go to a subway station. I recommend the one at the Los Santos airport, but as long as it's a station that has a stairwell leading underground, it's fine.


Do something to get the attention of the police. Litter. Shoot people. Point out graphical oversights Rockstar doesn't want you mentioning to the internet. (ANIMATE THE GODDAMN TRAIN WHEELS. THEY NEED TO ROLL LIKE YOU'D f*ckING EXPECT WHEELS TO DO WHEN THEY'RE IN MOTION) Whatever they don't like for you to be doing. Do that. Then, when they forcefully insist you stop doing whatever it was you were doing, retreat down the subway stairs, stopping just around the corner. The brave, but unsurprisingly stupid cops will pursue you, and you can pick them off, further increasing your wanted level. To collect your RP, go down all the way into the station, into the train tunnel itself. Everyone knows pigs have a poor sense of smell, and they'll have no f*cking clue where you went. They'll wander around like the stupid f*cks they are until they give up and go back to objectifying minorities and inhaling donuts, and you'll get your RP. Go back up and go for round two.

Edited by Kernlsandrs
  • Like 4

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That was a great post, no sarcasm. I laughed.

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How much RP does this give per round?

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This was the best post in history of this forum.

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10/10 would read again.

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"gr8 m8 i r8 8/8" PhillBellic. ;)

Edited by PhillBellic

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Man, if you could just author an official guide, I would buy it without hesitation.


Please consider doing some more submissions, relevant to the game, with your hilarious dialogue, comparisons and observations thrown in. I really enjoyed this, thank you!

Edited by auntjeff

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