Heist failure stories

[HirsuteDave]

So, quick grenade toss is a thing. And it's super handy to remember how to do it when crowd controlling in the Fleeca Job...

 

I had to apologize profusely to the L12 whose heist I ruined. It was a hell of a throw though - straight through the gap in the tellers window

[davey1975pafc]

Last night. Myself and two friends and a random. Pacific heist finale. After 2 restarts because of the random mess ups this was his/her 3 Rd and last time to get it right. We're on the bikes shouting and encouraging each other. The random at this point was way ahead of us. We concentrated on our own journey and eventually made the tunnel into the mountain. Got through and over the pathways to the last bridge before the jump. I stopped, he had abandoned a car on the bridge so I run up was impossible. He stood there facing us, turned and ran to the jump and walked off the mountain and all we saw was the splats of blood off the side of the mountain as he went. B***Ard lol

[Notgonnasay]

Same thing happened to me too. I played the Pacific Standard Finale with 3 randoms. I went pretty well, NOOSE wasn't there and we had about 1,2 mil. when we reached the bikes. We followed the marked track and failed 4 times. In the 5th try everything looked fine, 3 of us were already in the air parachuting down to the Dinghy, I looked back and saw the 4th guy jumping off the cliff and staying on his bike. Ofc he died and then he left.

 

Seriously, whats so hard about the getaway? Sure.. there are stupid things that can happen like normal cars rolling you over with 200 km/h, but that doesn't happen too often. Are people too stupid to use the brakes? If a police car is trying to ram you just slow down, there's nothing they can do besides trying to get you off the bike. The time limit is just a joke, there's no way of failing it that way. Just stay calm and on your bike..

[hotrats773]

I did Pacific Heist finale this morning as well. Seemed like a decent group of relatively high-level players. The first part in the bank went smooth as silk. No killed hostages, in and out like a boss. Once we got to the street, a giant cloud of stupid swept over and the same guy kept getting killed. Restart. Killed again. Restart. Killed again. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and kept on with it. At some point I regressed and started getting careless. Got killed. Restart. Finally we made it to the bikes where a whole new level of comedy hijinx ensued. Same guy, Same death. Over and over and over and over again. Still, I was patient because everyone seemed to be trying at least. Our deaths weren't the result of some stupid crap I've seen in the past. After about the 20th restart, my bladder couldn't take it any more and I had to back out. Came back and got an invite again.

 

Lather, rinse, repeat.

 

We never made it to the end.

 

[Giantsgiants]

I was doing the Series A finale with my female character because she still hadn't unlocked the Mule and Technical yet. I was playing with randoms.

 

On our first attempt, one guy killed himself with explosives when we were defending the warehouse. The criminal mastermind in me wanted to tell the guy not to use explosives and to keep his interaction menu up, but I chose to remain silent. We quick restarted.

 

On our second attempt, we passed the finale, but one of the players immediately killed us and blows up our cars right when we go back to freemode. This is why I always go passive whenever I finish a setup or finale with randoms.

[zecanelao]

First time my ps3 freezes during the Series A heist. It's almost impossible to finish a heist without technical issues.

[Sky_Light12]

1

inviting players

accepted , but didn't joined

 

2

inviting players

accepted

joining

joined

left

 

3

inviting players

accepted

joining

left

 

4

inviting players

blocked

[Bxx]

-Join the bikes set up for pac standard

-Just me and the inviter

-We wait nearly 20 minutes to the lobby fill up, occasionally a third player show up but leaves

-When lobby is finally full he kicks me out of it

[N9neLives]

Pacific Standard finale

Leader/host wants to do the getaway via boat/jetski

3 to 4 restarts trying to get everyone on board and getting to the beach

We manage to get there and no boat/jetski spawn

I suggest just taking the bikes and follow the route from Lester provides

I tell them I will stay behind everyone to help if someone crashes or runs into trouble

The 3 guys make the tunnel reach the checkpoint at the bridge and I am not far behind them going through the wynding trail that leads to the jump

I hear them talking/arguing about the jump off the cliff

I reach the bridge, go full throttle and prepare to jump the cliff

These newbs had their bikes parked on the cliff standing there contemplating how to jump off

I crash into their bikes and see a huge explosion that kills all of us

All I heard next was N9nelives just killed us

[TNFHOUND]

Just the other day I witnessed a new level of low in the endless encyclopedic archive of heist heinousy and darwinistic d debauchicals. I've seen many things you people wouldn't believe, moons

who can't press triangle to get in the chopper as we scream 'GET IN'. bikers fumbling the Pacific standard getaway multiple times because they don't know what a utility vest is.

 

But here is the worst so far, I meet a friendly player in free-mode (I kid you not) who wants to play the Fleeca job. We breeze the set-ups and I'm the driller. As I work through the hacking app, I'm interrupted by the revelation that the driver somehow crashed and died during the journey on the western highway, make of that what you will...

Edited April 9, 2015 by TM1138

[MeatSafeMurderer]

Playing Pacific Standard - Bikes with randoms. Getting sick of restarting it so I set it to easy. Two of us had made it but one was standing around next to the bike right near the destination so I went and grabbed the bike and delivered it while the 4th player made his way there...only for the trolling twat who was standing around to blow up all the f*cking bikes...GAH!

[Nutduster]

 

 

We were all about to make $100k when...

Smoothest GIF ever.

LOL my side's

 

 

Amazing. I once failed a long and difficult LS Connetion run that way - group of four, everyone died leaving just me, I flew the Buzzard to Madrazo's and decapitated myself in his driveway. That's a lesson you only need to learn once! But funny enough, when we did this finale for our recent run of Criminal Mastermind, one of my teammates ALMOST did the same thing on the beach. I started yelling "DON'T RUN INTO THE ROTOR!" and fortunately he yanked his controller sideways just before he hit it. He claims he wasn't going to run into it anyway, but I dunno.

[Neuling2000]

Pacific Standard - Convoi

 

A Merrywether Mesa pushed the truck off the road into the water while we were waiting on the bridge and shooting at them.

[Trevor Philips Inc]

Level 62 just spent 12 minutes failing to use the f*cking drill after 10 minutes hacking the easy as f*ck mini game

 

He volunteered to hack too....

[Leevikingpin]

Well mine is kind of two in but but here goes.

 

We had spent soooo many days recruiting people for the Criminal Mastermind challenge and after around 4 days we Finally found somebody who was seemingly sensible and who most importantly didn't die.

 

We gave the most dangerous heists trial runs before starting and was confident this player was good.

We did the fleeca job flawlessly (even got the elite challenge with B3ANTOWN).

We did the prison break flawlessly.

Here's where it goes pear shaped:

 

We start the humane labs raid and get to the hydra (EMP) mission and he decides to run out of cover and towards the immediate path of a rack of Rockets that are on fire in the hold.

 

Yep you guessed it... He dies getting blown up by the rockets.

 

So we give it another try, after all it was just a silly mistake wasn't it?

 

We get to the same mission and low and behold the guy dies at the same spot by the same rockets.

[fiebru787]

PAc convoy- i was helping 3 randoms doing this setup. First time they blow up everything and take the barrack. one of them blow up the insurgent and i knew we all going to fail. Then a savage destroy them fail. Second time i put my sentinel on the road and one of the random start raming me for no reason. i was so piss that i Suicide whit a sticky. FAIL. third restart i leave.

 

PAC-hacking. Do it whit randoms too. Same two guys dying 3 time so am leave

Edited April 9, 2015 by fiebru787

[TNFHOUND]

On a related note, is anyone else sick and tired of having to wait an additional amount of time to start a heist/set-up because of that one random/noob who never, EVER presses the 'ready' button at the clothing screen?

[fiebru787]

Prision Break bus. Do it whit randoms again! Two of them are working find but a level 28 whit his bike trying to do this setup die. He die 3 time idk how. I was very mad about it

[zecanelao]

Humane Labs heist: we were waiting in the Valkyrie for the pilot to get in. Co-pilot destroy my car and then kill one of the security guys... Mission failed. I quit after that.

Pacific Standard: level 2 dies when we were still inside the bank...

Edited April 10, 2015 by zecanelao

[skybourne2]

Was on Humane Lab setup mission Valkyrie. The mission loads and everyone hops in my insurgent except one guy who ran up to it threw a sticky thinking he would blow us all up and of course commits suicide. Knew this guy would be trouble but restarted anyways. Everyone including douchebag hops into insurgent. Were halfway there and doucher jumps out of the insurgent on the highway, gets up and briskly walks in a circle. I say f*ck it and quit, he sends me a message immediately saying "u mad". Like really dude you go through that trouble just to be a scumbag troll?

[HirsuteDave]

Not a fail but I've finally been trolled proper on delivering the EMP of all missions.

 

Considering it was an unmiked group of randoms I was somewhat surprised we managed to get the EMP delivered on the fourth attempt. And then we had to get away and all the fun began....

 

Dumbass kept jumping out of the back of the van and then trying to ride on top. After the fourth time I was seriously tempted to run him over but we were down to less than a minute to escape and I really didn't want to do this all over again.

[theNGclan]

Doing Pacific Standard Bank Heist.

 

Near perfect take, barely lost any money. We jump off the edge, and he commences shooting his guns while parachuting. No harm there, right? He jokingly fires a flare at my parachute, killing it instantly. I fall to my death instantly. Turned off the Xbox and went to bed.

 

f*ck me.

Edited April 10, 2015 by theNGclan

[CrysisAverted]

Host heist for some scrubs, pay the 100k

It turns out they didn't want to do the setups and just wanted the final heist

Lose 100k

 

Join heist

Host has 65% cut

idc

one dude goes on mic and asks for 25%

host leaves

[hotrats773]

Not a fail but I've finally been trolled proper on delivering the EMP of all missions.

 

Considering it was an unmiked group of randoms I was somewhat surprised we managed to get the EMP delivered on the fourth attempt. And then we had to get away and all the fun began....

 

Dumbass kept jumping out of the back of the van and then trying to ride on top. After the fourth time I was seriously tempted to run him over but we were down to less than a minute to escape and I really didn't want to do this all over again.

 

 

I've been running into a lot of high-level trolls on this lately. Maybe just a coincidence. Too many doods with serious mommy/bed-wetting issues.

[maz9000]

Prison break heist with 3 random " young people" I was the pilot.

I Do not know what the demolition guys story was, never once tried getting in the buzzard,

1st attempt he drove to the prison.

2nd attempt the same.

3rd attempt the shouty heist leader dies just before the demo guy, who adopted the same strategy as before.

4th attempt demo guy is nowhere to be seen again, after bout 10 mins he dies whist approaching the prison,

 

I couldn't attempt a 5th time with these jokers.

I may not have made any virtual cash but I knew what I was in for when I joined the lobby.

Edited April 10, 2015 by maz9000

[RockstarBlows]

 

Not a fail but I've finally been trolled proper on delivering the EMP of all missions.

 

Considering it was an unmiked group of randoms I was somewhat surprised we managed to get the EMP delivered on the fourth attempt. And then we had to get away and all the fun began....

 

Dumbass kept jumping out of the back of the van and then trying to ride on top. After the fourth time I was seriously tempted to run him over but we were down to less than a minute to escape and I really didn't want to do this all over again.

 

 

I've been running into a lot of high-level trolls on this lately. Maybe just a coincidence. Too many doods with serious mommy/bed-wetting issues.

 

i cant even troll people in heists cuz the retards just end up dying and failing the sh*t on their own

[maz9000]

 

 

 

 

Not a fail but I've finally been trolled proper on delivering the EMP of all missions.

 

Considering it was an unmiked group of randoms I was somewhat surprised we managed to get the EMP delivered on the fourth attempt. And then we had to get away and all the fun began....

 

Dumbass kept jumping out of the back of the van and then trying to ride on top. After the fourth time I was seriously tempted to run him over but we were down to less than a minute to escape and I really didn't want to do this all over again.

 

I've been running into a lot of high-level trolls on this lately. Maybe just a coincidence. Too many doods with serious mommy/bed-wetting issues.

 

i cant even troll people in heists cuz the retards just end up dying and failing the sh*t on their own

Maybe the troll is being trolled

[*Lola]

Idiots and their trolling.LOL

 

I see a lot of higher ranks in the Fleeca heist lately. Changing the percentage at the last second, thinking you didn't notice, only leaving you with 5 or 10%. There's still time to back out during the mask selection screen.LOL

It's not like I wanted to join them anyway. Quick job puts me in Fleeca quite often. Still fun hanging around to see what they pay and to get their hopes up.

 

OT

I was gunner on the the truck in Series A heist the other day. I ask the guy to be careful and not dump me off as it would kill me and we would fail.

As we get out of the tunnel, he decided to speed up and head off the cliff. I was launched off the truck and had time to open my parachute before hitting the ground. He failed at killing me.

The heist still failed. One of the guys in the trucks died.

If we were close to them we could have helped.LOL

Playing the heist as it was intended is too much for players to comprehend.

Edited April 10, 2015 by *Lola

[Giantsgiants]

Pacific Standard Finale. I get invited to a party by some randoms I played with a while ago. One guy insists on using the strategy where you invite everyone to your apartment and getting in the Kuruma.

 

Unfortunately, each attempt ended in failure due to someone committing suicide with explosives. The strategy guy got madder and madder with each failure. He was hurling the F-word, the N-word, and the R-word like they were nothing. Eventually, we got kicked back to freeroam because one of the guys "left." However, we start up the job again. This was around our fifth attempt at it, and someone committed suicide by firing an RPG at the bank doors that close back on you. At this point, I wanted to facepalm, but I was laughing so hard. I'll admit it was funny watching the randoms blow themselves up and hearing the guy rage.

 

After around the eighth attempt, I had enough. I wished the group best of luck and left the party.

[gregu]

Ugh, had a new one tonight. Prison break finale and I'm demolition. Just blew up the bus and I'm driving the red Mesa to the buzzard. When BOOM the Mesa explodes. wtf. So now I'm just as far from the other red Mesa as I am from the buzzard, so I decide to just run to the heli. I run about 5 steps when I'm blown up again. We fail. Still not 100% sure what happened. The velum pilot was flying VERY low and circling the airfield. So my best guess is the lazer was so low trying to follow him, it was able to shoot missiles at me (or was shooting them at him and I just happened to be where they were hitting) either way, it was a new one for me.

Edited April 11, 2015 by gregu