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Create your own mission for GTA IV

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A Dish Served Cold (altered, and taking Kill Derrick option into consideration beforehand)

Mission Name: A Dish Served Cold

Mission Given: After One Last Thing

Mission Given By: Niko Bellic

Mission Reward: $2500


Along the way to the "Revenge" symbol...

Niko calls Francis McReary and Francis answers.

Niko: Hey Francis, I'll need some help taking care of an old enemy, Dimitri Rascalov.

Francis: That sneaky Russian bastard? Sure thing! I'll be there ASAP.



As soon as Niko gets to the docks, Francis shows up in his police car. Both of them get out of their cars. 

Francis: Alright, I'm going in. You cover me up there! Once the main area of the boat is cleared, I'll let you know so you can rush in.

Niko: Will do!



Niko climbs up the ladder all the way up to the crane and grabs the sniper rifle.

Russian mobster: Get lost, pig!

Francis shoots all Russian mobsters guarding the Platypus. Francis then goes aboard and Niko takes out some Russian mobsters with Francis taking out others.

Francis: The Russians have me locked in! Come here quick!


Niko rushes down the crane and aboard the boat. There, he comes to Francis's rescue by shooting the Russian mobsters. Niko and Francis then move in with Niko getting to the control panel, killing all Russians that get in his way. Once Niko gets there, he opens a hatch.

Francis: I'll follow you down there!

As Niko rushed all the way down to Francis, he guided Francis to the opened hatch. 

Francis: Dimitri Rascalov! Come out with your hands behind your head! You are under arrest!

Niko goes down then does Francis.

Francis: I've got the left side. You take the right, Niko!

Niko kills Russian mobsters from his right and ambushes Dimitri that way while Francis does the same on the left side.

Niko: We've got you cornered, Dimitri!

Francis: Your only two options are to be arrested or die, my friend!

Dimitri: Not if I kill the Balkan and pig scums myself! (speaks Russian)

Four of Dimitri's men come out. Francis covers Niko and tells him that Dimitri is "all his". After Francis kills all four of Dimitri's buddies, Niko shoots Dimitri Rascalov until he is very weakened.

Dimitri: If you kill me, the whole city will be after you! (speaks Russian again)

If Niko takes a little while, Francis will say "Come on, Niko. You wanted him dead". If Niko takes too long, Francis will kill Dimitri himself. Either way around, Niko says "Goodbye Dimitri! I should've put you out of your misery a long time ago" and Francis gives Niko the money. Francis and Niko get off of the boat then Francis gets away in his police car while Niko gets away in the car he drove.

Edited by ThatKyloRenGuy

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Out of Commission (altered, taking Kill Playboy X option into consideration beforehand)

Mission Name: Out of Commission

Mission Given: After Mr. and Mrs. Bellic

Mission Given By: Little Jacob

Reward: $250,000


Niko gets a call from Little Jacob, telling him that he and Roman are in a car by Jimmy Pegorino’s men.

Niko: Wait for me, I’ll be right there and what’s Roman doing there? This is not the place for him.

Little Jacob: He’s backing you up, an we both, seen?

Niko: I know one more guy who should do the trick. I’ll call him on my way to you guys.

Little Jacob: We need all da help we can get. You do it breda. One love!


On his way to Roman and Little Jacob, Niko calls Dwayne and he answers.

Niko: Dwayne! Thank God you answered! I need you to assist me, my cousin, and another one of my friends in taking down a Mafia boss named Jimmy Pegorino. You in?

Dwayne: Well, he does seem rather dangerous. I’ll see what I can do. (hangs up)



Niko gets in the car and tells Roman and Little Jacob, “One more guy is coming to help us. Thank you both, but this is not the place for you Roman. I don’t want to lose you, especially not on the same day I lost Kate.”

Roman: Kate died at my wedding and you are my cousin, Niko. I am helping you alongside Little Jacob and this other friend of yours.

Little Jacob: Dem boys are getting ready to leave, seen? Me tink dey next stop is wit Pegorino.

Mafioso: F*ck! We got a tail! I don’t want to be late to meeting with the Peg!



Niko begins chasing the mafiosi. After a little bit of it, he says “Where the f*ck is this guy going?”

Little Jacob: Easy rasta. He’s taking us back to Pegorino. You need to chill.

Roman: I’m not f*cking chilled! We are speeding down the highway at God only knows how fast, cars are coming toward us, people are shooting at us. You’ve been smoking too much, Jacob! Whatever chilled is, this is not! Oh, and by the way, cousin, who is this guy who’s meeting us to take down Jimmy P?

Niko: A friend who I spared earlier. His name is Dwayne Forge.



Niko goes up a ramp and over a creek. His car crashes into the one of the mobsters. Another car shows up and Dwayne comes out of it. He is ducking with Niko, Roman, and Little Jacob.

Roman: You must be this Dwayne Forge my cousin was telling me about.

Dwayne: Yes. Nice to meet you.

Niko: No time for an introduction. We got to get Pegorino.

Little Jacob: So what be da plan, ras clot?

Niko: Jacob, the best way you can help me is keeping my cousin alive. Dwayne, you go straight in the casino. I’ll cover you.

Dwayne: Sounds like a good plan to me.

Little Jacob: (runs in the distance with Roman) Roman and I will be wit you, soon, breda!



Niko goes the back way, climbing up ladders, and right by a building next to the old casino. He uses a sniper rifle to take out mafiosi and others are taken out by Dwayne.

Niko: I’ll follow you into the old casino. Leave Pegorino to me!

Dwayne: I gotcha bro!

Niko goes down the small building and into the grand casino, killing all mafiosi who get in his way with Dwayne backing him up. He gets to the end of the stairs as Jimmy Pegorino is at the top.



Jimmy P: You motherf*cker! Don’t think for a second that this was anyone’s fault but your own! You could’ve worked with me and everything would’ve been gravy.

Niko: I wanted out and you killed someone I cared about. It’s over for you, Jimmy.

Jimmy P: I still got something left! (runs through a door)



Dwayne follows Niko up the stairs. Niko and Dwayne shoot the mafiosi and climb down the ladder. They shoot and blow up the car of another group of mafiosi. Jimmy P is getting away on a jet ski. Niko and Dwayne get to ground level and Dwayne gets on the back of a motorcycle with Niko driving it and staying close by the water.



Niko and Dwayne go up a ramp and Dwayne holds onto Niko as Niko grabs Roman’s hand. Little Jacob is flying a helicopter. Both Niko and Dwayne are let up and Niko takes the helicopter’s controls. Rockets are fired at the helicopter. It starts to catch fire and Niko lands it. All four of them get out.

Niko: All three of you have been a great help! Now all I’ve got to do is finish off Jimmy P!

Dwayne: You go do that, Niko. I’ll keep your friend and cousin company!



Niko shoots straight through a group of mafiosi and finally wounds Jimmy P at a tree.



Niko: I told you to leave me alone.

Jimmy P: I give the orders here. Me.

Niko: Not looking so good there, eh Jimmy?

Jimmy P: Screw you!

Niko: Big talk. You wanna know something funny?

Jimmy P: Not really.

Niko: The Commission - the original five families. I know those guys. And they thought of you as a fat f*cking joke!

Jimmy: Whatever.

Niko: A joke! Huh?

As Jimmy attempts to shoot Niko, Niko shoots him in the forehead, thus killing him. Roman, Little Jacob, and Dwayne are then seen rushing to Niko.

Roman: We did it, man! Now we can start making money..freely! We won, man. We won!

Niko, Roman, Little Jacob, and Dwayne all walk away.


(Ending credits roll)

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Mission Name: Hunting

Mission Given: After completion of the game (Kill Playboy X, Kill Derrick, and Revenge ending must be picked in order for this to be possible, and it doesn't matter whether you kill or spare Darko)

Mission Given By: Homer Spurlock (my own original character)

Reward: $500,000


Note: This is ONLY in my fan-made GTA IV but after killing Playboy X and Derrick, and picking the Revenge ending, the map becomes even bigger and includes a whole new region called New England (consisting of Massachusetts, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Maine, I can't think of parody names, lol). Niko will be capable of going back and forth to New England, Liberty City, and Alderney.


Niko has to go to Vermont, where he meets a redneck guy.

Niko: Hey! The name's Niko!

Homer: Hey, I never met a guy named Niko! Nice to meet ya, the name's Homer Spurlock! You look a little Russian. However, you also look like somebody who was associated with the Lost MC.

Niko: I knew one of those guys - Johnny Klebitz.

Homer: I know him too! He and his brothers sometimes come out here, hunting from Alderney.

Niko: I was a hitman for hire in both Liberty City and Alderney.

Homer: Man, sounds like you'd enjoy some hunting!

Niko: Hunting sounds fun.

Homer: Then what are ya waiting for? Deck yourself out in camo in my trailer!

Niko has to walk inside the trailer and when he walks out, he's wearing camo.

Homer: You look mighty nice in camo, Niko!

Niko: So where are you from?

Homer: Right here in Vermont! I also go hunting in New Hampshire and Maine! Since you've roamed throughout Liberty City, Alderney, and I assume the lower states of New England, I suggest going hunting in all three states. You in?

Niko: Sure.

Homer: That's the spirit! Now, I've got a long list of animals I want ya to hunt: deer, moose, elk, caribou, bear, and a few different birds!

Niko: I can handle that.

Homer: Of course ya can! Now, remember. When you see a deer, moose, elk, or caribou without antlers, hold your fire. Only shoot the ones with antlers.

Niko has to roam Vermont, find hiding spots, and shoot the animals he's supposed to kill. If he kills any does or cows, the mission will fail. Once the mission is completed, he calls Homer.

Niko: I got each of the animals you wanted me to kill.

Homer: That's great! Now you can hunt in your spare time whenever you want in New Hampshire and Maine! I wish ya good luck in hunting, Niko! (hangs up)

Niko can now hunt in Vermont, Maine, and New Hampshire at any time he wants.

Edited by ThatKyloRenGuy

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Under the Big Top

Mission Name: Under the Big Top

Mission Given: After Shadow but before Rigged to Blow

Mission Given By: Mikhail Faustin

Reward: $600


Niko arrives at Perestroika. There, he meets Dimitri Rascalov.

Niko: Dimitri, nice to see you again.

Dimitri: Likewise.

As they walk towards Mikhail, he is once again sitting down with Katerina and Vera.

Dimitri: Mikhail, this is like the third time I’ve seen you with those two women? Are you cheating on your wife Ilyena, for them?

Mikhail: Why are you always up my ass, Dimitri? Can’t you just not be for once?

Dimitri: That probably means yes.

Mikhail speaks Russian to Katerina and Vera so they get up and walk away.

Dimitri and Niko sit down.

Mikhail: If either one of you tells my wife, I swear I’ll rip both of your tongues out!

Niko: So what did you bring the two of us here for this time, Mikhail?

Mikhail: Listen Niko, as Dimitri obviously already knows, our crime family launders our money through a circus too. We have a show going on in Liberty City tonight right here in South Bohan!

Niko: Yeah, so?

Mikhail: As usual, we’ve got some protestors complaining about how rough our lions, elephants, and bears have it. I want you and Dimitri not to kill them, but to teach them a lesson.

Dimitri: Oh my God, Mikhail, you get crazier and crazier by the f*cking minute!

Mikhail: Stop questioning my orders, Dimitri! (slams his fist against the table)

Dimitri: They’re just some wacky, granola head college students!

Mikhail: Yeah, and we can’t have our circus shut down by them, or the feds, or ANYONE! Now what are you two waiting for? BE GONE! (swats at Niko and Dimitri)

Dimitri and Niko walk away, shaking their heads.

Niko now has to get in the car with Dimitri. On the way there...

Niko: I agree with you, about Mikhail.

Dimitri: Who wouldn’t? Ya know, I really want the old Mikhail back. He used to be much different than he is now.

Niko: I can believe that.

Upon arrival, Niko and Dimitri get out of the car and walk up to the protestors.

Dimitri: HEY! Get lost! You all have no reason to be here!

Protestor: Who do you think you are?

Dimitri: A member of a family who runs this circus! That’s who! This is your final warning to leave!

Protestor: F*ck you, animal abuser!

Dimitri: Niko, looks like we’ll have to do this the old fashioned way.

Dimitri hands Niko a baseball bat so he has to whack the protestor who insulted Dimitri with it.

The other protestors run away, crying assault. The player now has two wanted level stars and has to get back in the car with Dimitri.

Dimitri: Sh*t! Now the pigs are after us!

Niko has to lose the cops. Once they are lost..

Dimitri: Alright, take me back to Perestroika. I’ll give Mikhail a call.

Dimitri calls Mikhail.

Dimitri: (speaking Russian back and forth)

Dimitri hangs up.

Niko: So how does Mikhail feel about this?

Dimitri: Well, he’s not happy that we attracted heat but he is happy that the protestors likely won’t be coming back.

Niko: Sounds like the first time in his life that he was actually rational.

Dimitri: I just hope the audience under the big top didn’t witness it. If they did, Mikhail will not be very happy with either of us!

Once Dimitri is dropped off at Perestroika, he gives Niko his reward and goes inside.

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Well, this is actually a fan-made TBOGT mission, but I hope it counts! :) 


Veggie Tales

Mission Name: Veggie Tales

Mission Given: After Dropping In but before In the Crosshairs

Mission Given By: Ray Bulgarin

Reward: $3000


Luis Fernando Lopez enters the mansion of Ray Bulgarin, and as usual, Timur is playing his guitar.

Luis: Yo Ray, why is Timur always playing that guitar?

Ray: Well, this time, it’s because he’s getting pumped up so I’m glad you asked, Luis! Listen, some vegan f*cker by the name of Trey Hugger who owns a vegan restaraunt of his own is threatening to put my bar here in Liberty City out of business! Timur and I had just stolen a vegetable truck and filled it with explosives. You and Timur are to go to Fruity Fables, the vegan restaraunt he owns, act as delivery men, run away, and detonate the bombs!

Timur: Don’t keep me waiting! I am SO ready for this!

Luis is to get in the vegetable truck with Timur and begin driving to the waypoint. On the way there...

Timur: I hate vegan food! It makes me sick anyway!

Luis: I’m Dominican. Not all of us are vegans, though we don’t eat much red meat.

Timur: Well try not to crash this too much or we might explode. I’d rather not die alongside someone who smells like fish and poultry! (cracks up)

Upon arrival, Luis and Timur get out of the truck when they meet Trey Hugger.

Trey Hugger: Just in time! Wait a second! You two don’t look quite like veggie deliverymen.

Luis: What? Is it because I’m Dominican and he’s Russian or something? You a racist?

Trey Hugger: No man! Racism ain’t cool! Oh well! Thanks, I guess. And remember, stay good for the environment!

Luis is then to run away alongside Timur to a safe distance while Trey Hugger is inspecting the vegetable truck. On Timur’s mark, Luis is to detonate the bombs using his phone. Both the vegetable truck and Fruity Fables explode, alongside Trey Hugger. Luis now has three wanted level stars. He has to jack a vehicle, wait for Timur and lose his wanted level. Upon losing it, he gets a call from Ray Bulgarin.

Ray: So, how did it go?

Luis: Out with a bang.

Ray: Ha! Looks like he’s no longer interfering with my businesses, nor will he be f*cking us over with marijuana deals! I’ll give you the money at my mansion where you drop off Timur.

Upon arrival at Ray’s mansion, Luis and Timur get out, Luis is given the money, and the mission is completed.

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Grotti Vigilante
15 hours ago, ThatKyloRenGuy said:

Luis! Listen, some vegan f*cker by the name of Trey Hugger

You sir have just won the internet for today.

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