The "O Canada" Update (Concept)

[CrazyDog150]

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

Do you think the Independence day update was flattering to Americans?

 

It had it's faults, yes, but it also showed the patriotic side of things, too. I mean, let's also take into account that Los Santos is in the USA, not Canada, so it'd be a bit pointless to have a Canadian Update regardless.

 

Well Trevor is Canadian. He could give our players new missions involving maple syrup and stuff....

Have you forgotten what happens if you make fun of Trevor about him being Canadian?

Last time someone did that,he slaughtered half of Ft.Zancudo and Mirror Park with a Grenade Launcher..

Edited September 17, 2014 by CrazyDog150

[TheNarrative]

Please, no more "concept" update threads

[Dumb guy]

Please, no more "concept" update threads

That have nothing to do with America

Edited September 17, 2014 by Dumb guy

[Soran Is On]

Noo doot aboot it!

 

 

 

I'd trade my golf club in to beat a mothafuka with a hockey stick

Edited September 17, 2014 by stonedpimpso

[BrianM]

How about a "O North Korea" concept? The mods would love that.

[Gingy Eastwood]

How about a "O North Korea" concept? The mods would love that.

 

Or like, Madagascar, Russia, South Africa, Netherlands (They didn't get a parachute, so it'd be good compensation.)

[XJpostman]

I could use those cars for about 6 months of the year where I live. The Winters up here pretty much require 4x4. I'd expect to see an SUV, a rusted 1980's farm truck, and maybe a WRX style awd car.

It'd be cool to a side by side too. Can't go a block without seeing one of those on a truck around here.

 

 

 

 

 

Love the hockey stick and clothing though.

[kokot]

XLcBsIC6LoE

 

Forgot how to imbed...

 

 

Edited September 17, 2014 by kokot

[Quarthon]

There would be a new property to purchase as well: Igloo Heights

 

Edited September 17, 2014 by Quarthon

[AboveAndBeyoncé]

What the he double hockey sticks is this??? See what I did there Giantgiants??

[Not A Nice Person]

 

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

Do you think the Independence day update was flattering to Americans?

 

Ikr.

[Quarthon]

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

Since when are Canadians a race?

[jackjoejim]

f*ck Canada

 

This member received a two day ban for this comment

Edited September 17, 2014 by ~Tiger~

[Mars A7X]

There should be a "Get a Life" Update (Concept)

[Gingy Eastwood]

 

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

Since when are Canadians a race?

 

 

I'm sorry, but what's the correct term for being "offensive" to a nationality? I know Canadians aren't a race, thank you.

[Quarthon]

 

 

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

Since when are Canadians a race?

 

 

I'm sorry, but what's the correct term for being "offensive" to a nationality? I know Canadians aren't a race, thank you.

 

"Stereotype" would be the word you want.

[NubcakeVII]

Not a bad idea, but just seems meh.

 

By the way, what's up with all the country DLC concept threads?

 

Can't wait for the Belarus and Algerian updates!

[TimelyMeerkat]

I would wear that Mountie outfit. I always thought they looked cool.

[livejoker]

Hope you'd be able to sh*t on Quebeckers head like any truly great Canadian do.

Well now I'm offended but in Canadian fashion: sorry I'm offended.

 

So my comment got deleted when I gave actual praise. Guess that wasn't good enough. I don't mention it around the forum a lot because I'm not a big fan of the hate Canada gets but I'm from CanadiaLand and I got a few ideas that Giantsgiants missed to add. Also, I wasn't offended in any way at the OP - I thought it was hilarious, I love the clichés we get. The hate is another thing...

 

Anyway, first up:

Stores:

Canada has two distinctive stores that could actually work in GTA. I'm a big fan of both and go there quite often. Here they are below:

 

Canadian Tire:

Canadian Tire is like Wal-Mart but for the working man - it's got tools (actual tools) and other tools (those that work there). If there's a zombie outbreak, you can certainly find a military nuke in there just by the amount of gadgets and stuff this store has.

 

Application in the game:

The only way this could be shoe-horned into the game is if the You Tool hardware store was open. You Tool is a parody of Home Depot and Lowe's (U.S stores) but here in Canada I would say Home Depot and Canadian Tire have some sort of rivalry (they're beside one another in a city near where I live so it might just be in my case). If You Tool is open, a Canadian Tire parody could easily be added to the many warehouses unused in the game. The store could offer different melee weapons and maybe add renovation options for your apartment/house.

 

 

 

 

 

Tim Hortons:

Opens early in the morning, always has a fresh cup of Joe ready and supports Canadian traditions like a nagging grandmother. Tim Hortons has doughnuts, sandwiches, coffee, and warm smiles. Anyone becomes Canadian when walking into one of these.

 

Application in the game:

Tim Hortons could easily replace Burger Shots around the map (most notably the one in Mirror Park) as they're not used at all. Tim Hortons pops up there and offers Canadian food (see below) that gives health and advantages. Those advantages can multiply depending on what Canadian attire you're currently wearing. The one pictured below is quite small from what I can see in the picture but looks cozy and small enough to be in GTA:SA, no?

 

 

 

 

 

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Food:

Canada has some weird dishes but are at this point tradition. Poutine is probably the most famous dish and is parodied and made a few places across the world. If you think Canada, you think poutine. Just typing the word makes me want one (which I will do after posting this). Of course we got poutine but we also have something a bit more niche but as desirable.

 

Poutine:

Let your mouth water when looking at a styrofoam bowl filled with french fries, pieces of melted cheese and brown sauce (or BBQ sauce) covering the whole thing. Now I don't know about other places in Canada but here in Québec you can go to most restaurants and see a whole menu dedicated to poutines: bacon poutine, salsa poutine, mexican poutine, beef poutine, hamburger poutine, triple cheese poutine, hell I'm sure you can order a poutine on top of another poutine. Our fascination with poutine drives us so wild we'd vote for Vladimire Putin just because his last name sounds like poutine.

 

Application in the game:

Taco trucks can be seen driving around. Why not add another truck that drives around and lets you purchase poutines - raising your health. Or open one of the many unused shops around town that serves poutine. Seriously, any shop can make a poutine. It can be a fancy restaurant or a bum in an alley. Poutine is like the Canadian version of weed - easily obtainable once you know what to ask.

 

 

 

 

 

Beaver's Tail:

Call us cannibals but here in Canada we'll eat something call a beaver's tail. It's not an actual beaver's tail, it's just some dough shaped in a weird bloated phallus that's covered in some sort of sugary substance. What's great about it is it's a mixture between an oversized pretzel and a chewy bread. You can also add toppings such as hot chocolate, bananas, strawberries, caramel and is so known in Canada that Obama himself went to buy one when he visited Canada back in 2009. Seriously, look it up!

 

Application in the game:

Same terms as the poutine. While poutine can be your supper, the beaver tail is purely a treat and should be available at certain hours of the game (can't buy one at night and early morning, for example). It would give more health for your character and a burst of energy (move slightly faster). Crashing effect afterwards may be added.

 

 

 

 

 

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Vehicles:

Now I'll be honest, I don't know much about Canadian cars. I know those that are most popular so why not head from there? Why not include cars that also formed the automotive industry in Canada? With Wikipedia nearby, I searched for cars that, as a Canadian, would fit nicely in the game and make all those living in the snow feel warm.

 

I would also want to add any Ford or Chevy's as Canada is a big truck country (we actually use our trucks to carry loads on a farm and go over rough-terrain, not put stupid tires on it and live in a nice neighborhood like most Americans with trucks do) but the amount of trucks would be too diverse and immense. The most popular trucks here are F-150's (that somewhat resemble the Sadler) and Chevy Silverado.

 

Ford Model C:

A weird one from the start, yes, but Ford Motor's Company of Canada's first car built was a Ford Model C. It would only be fitting to add this car to a Canadian update as Ford has grown as one, if not the biggest Canadian auto manufacturer (their F-150 trucks can be seen every 10 miles, seriously).

 

Application in the game:

The Valentines Day update showed us the Roosevelt and there was a time where GTA:O players asked for more "old" vehicles. You seriously can't get older than this. While the vehicle doesn't have any sort of cover, I'm sure the in-game mechanic could build a roof as these would be built with a frame and then people would take them to a blacksmith or something similar and ask them to build the rest. I may be talking out of my ass for this but it's something along those lines where the auto maker would make the platform and then you'd need to bring it to someone to put seats in or something. The options in this case would be insane and show variety in customization.

 

 

 

 

Acadian Beaumont Sport Coupe:

I've actually seen this type of car in a local car show and I'm surprised to learn it's a Canadian thing. The picture also shows a man holding a Tim Hortons cup lol.

 

Application in the game:

This car would fit perfectly along with the Phoenix and Blade. It's a muscle car with style and I know for a fact that a lot of GTA:O players would love to own this car - despite not knowing what it really is. It looks good though!

 

 

 

 

 

Canadian Paintjobs:

Canada have their rednecks and they're the most devoted to Canada. They'll put small flags from their car windows to support their favorite hockey team to spray paint their lawn red and white. The next step is to paint their car and show the whole world that if Canada was in the form of a car it would be a sh*tty 90's van that drove around a bunch of annoying kids.

 

Application in the game:

Paintjobs would be cheap and have a bit of spray paint on the tires because those that do this are amateurs. A more expensive paintjob would be available where the spray paint on the wheels doesn't appear and everyone would know you're a true Canadian.

 

 

 

 

 

Bombardier Snowmobile Vehicle:

This vehicle would be a Pegasus vehicle and climb any mountain. Ski rack optional, option to change tracks to tires. Due to being Pegasus vehicle, though, it would have buying options as stated.

 

Application in the game:

As said - Pegasus vehicle. It would have the same speed as a tank and the front skis would be actual wheels instead. A warning yellow light would be placed on top of it, much like a utility truck would have. It could hold 6-10 people depending on how R* model it and could crush players easily (these things are dangerous to stand around).

 

 

 

 

 

 

AVGP (Cougar, in this case) :

First off, the wiki page for this has the picture named, "A pair of Canadian Cougars", I was expecting a bunch of old milfs eating poutine. The AVGP would be a great defense against the tank, being able to take 2-3 shots from it. It would serve mostly as a people carrier and cross any terrain. You know it's the Canadian version of it as the picture shown below has green trucks and dudes not camouflaged at all.

 

Application in the game:

This would be a Pegasus vehicle, such as the tank. Possibility of keeping the turret as some games remove the turret (Crackdown 2 comes to mind). Could carry 8-10 people depending on how R* design it (people carrier) or could be 3-6 (if it's an actual light tank).

 

 

 

 

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Weapons:

 

I'm not a big fan of weapons, I just like to shoot them - I don't find their real life counter-part and jerk off to how they sound. While searching I found Canada and France, of all the pairing that could happen, made a rocket launcher that looks like it could shoot a rocket enveloped in tin foil so when it reaches the target it can be reheated and sent back. I present...

 

ERYX:

catchy name, right? The ERYX would be another rocket launcher that could be bought at the Ammu-Nation.

 

Application in the game:

As said, it could be bought at Ammu-Nation. The rockets would be slower but punch more than the rocket launcher that we currently have...pretty much like the co-pilot rockets that the buzzard has. Unlike the pictures below, you can't really lie down with it but seeing how big it is people would know when you're aiming one at them!

 

 

 

 

 

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What I forgot to mention/add:

 

-Mooses

-Mounties (as pictured above by Timely), would be an outfit along with a mountie weapon (probably some sort of stick)

-ice skates to wear as shoes

-probably some Canadian-ish mustaches

 

*edit*

Don't sweat it, Tiger. If my post was removed, I take it my post wasn't worth keeping and if a topic interests me enough to post again, I'll make a better post. So thank you for doing your job, seriously.

 

So I checked my removed post - it's crap! You can remove it if you want, I prefer this post anyway.

Edited September 17, 2014 by livejoker

[~Tiger~]

 

So my comment got deleted when I gave actual praise.

 

Hi, your comment was taken down because it quoted a removed post. I've edited your post and restored it.

 

Thanks for the above, quality post.

[LordZekrom]

What I want is a re-skin of the Jerry can with a bottle of 100% all natural high quality maple syrup.

 

New wildlife, such as this flock of meese.

 

Also, give us the ability to harvest maple syrup from various trees.

Looks super fun.

Edited September 17, 2014 by LordZekrom

[livejoker]

The jerry can re-skinned as a big maple syrup bottle is genius.

[universetwisters]

Can you add in Theodore Tugboat as a downloadable ship?

[hasidichomeboy]

we canadians are cool, eh?

[S-M-O-K-E]

Great post livejoker!!

 

Mmmmmm....... poutine. Im hungry now lol. Bacon poutine lays chips here i come

 

Would love to see a CT & Tims in GTA. Would be rather entertaining.

Edited September 17, 2014 by S-M-O-K-E

[canadian94eh]

This is racist if anything. (I speak from my Canadianess). Tell me, Giantsgiants, do you actually and honestly know the Canadian anthem? While it's sometimes funny to poke fun at us for being polite and hockey and stuff, I don't think you could very well add a whole update regarding it. Especially considering there's no day of any significance in October for Canadians. (And, Halloween Update > Canadian Special.) Maybe next year in July, R* can be a bit more diverse in that patriotic special, I dunno, it ain't that important to me. What's next, a British concept?

 

that's not really true, we have thanksgiving in October ... but i agree we wouldn't really have enough stuff to make up a whole update, it would be nice just to get a few canadian-themed clothing options ... hopefully for the next gen games there can be a country themed category in the stores and have a bunch of different countries represented ... or some country themed paint jobs for the cars ...

[Accendo]

Well obviously the greatest country in the world to live in should get SOME recognition.

It'd be sweet to get an M1 Garand and the Avro Aero.

[Dumb guy]

Oh! Canada!

 

[DarkSavageDeathlyCloud]

though i think the concept sucks balls, canadians are offended by this ?

LMFAO

did those braindead idiots that are offended by this actualy relize gta isnt realy flattering any kind of group and uses sterotyping like....well its a goddamn trademark for crying out loud !

[_MessenJah_]