Vicious girl griefers: Two against the world.

[kyennamo]

I am part of a dynamic duo of vicious female griefers. We aren't your average griefers though. More on that in a bit. But, we generally post up in our spot and "lay the trap" and just mow down anyone and everyone who comes. Whether they are looking for trouble or not. I know 90% of the people who read this will be guys so I will tell you up front. We are both in our early/mid 30s and both an unassuming kind of cute. I only tell you this because it matters to you. I guarantee it was on your mind. The first things you thought were "are these girls cute?" and "how old are they?" You generally decide the value of a woman by what she looks like. Shame on you.

Ok so, I will get this out of the way early. I USE A TANK please don't turn this into a tank bash. I realize people ruin the game with the tank so I am kind enough to keep the tank in the "kill zone" and not chase people down or spawn kill. Also, the reason we play tons of GTA because my best friend and I live a thousand miles apart and hanging out for a few hours a night talking and playing GTA is much better than just talking on skype like we used to.

My partner is the chopper pilot. And what a marvelous pilot she is. She is particularly adept at taking out ground targets you can't lock onto with the missiles. And while she is a very good dog fight pilot, her true skill lies in close air support with the chopper and sniping. We both do a lot of sniping. She is very skilled (I am a fairly good sniper but she is definitely better) She snipes when she lands the chopper or if one isn't available "given the current set of circumstances"

As I said earlier. I am the tanker . Everyone already assumes a lot when I say that. They assume anyone in a tank can kick ass. And they are right to a degree. But it always ends. The tanker inevitably gets killed by, usually another tank (now you have a room full of tanks). Or possibly an F16 or even a grenade or RPG. Hell, even the cops continuously doing suicide runs into you......it all adds up. It’s been covered, bitched about and argued about before. I beg you. not to do it here.

 

So what makes us different? Well.......

 

1) We GENERALLY don't spawn kill.

2) we generally don't give chase (not too far anyway)

3) We do NOT cheat

4) We don't F***ing lose

 

Let me elaborate:

 

We are often in rooms for an hour or 2 while racking up as many as 120ish kills between the 2 of us while managing to keep our combined death count as low as 0-3 while being under constant attack often taking on as many as 8 or 9 players in the room at one time. I will often stay in a SINGLE tank for the entire session. I destroy tanks easily. And one of my favorite phrases is "I eat F16s for breakfast". So if you think grabbing a tank or a F16 will turn things around for you I assure you it will not. I will not go into the specifics of our scenarios. Only an idiot tells the enemy their plan. I assume some of you may use similar tactics but I have never seen it executed quite so well by anyone else.

Here is what I will tell you. As some of you may have guessed by now, part of this is we often use a bounty or (rarely) a simian vehicle as bait......... and murder anyone who comes a knockin. I don't claim to have invented that racket. I just claim to have perfected it. We also use Lester, Lamar and Meriwether to our advantage and to draw people in and call off cops and stuff like that. Also keep in mind that if one or both of us have bounties (which is often the case) we cannot go into passive mode. We maintain vigilance with the maps at all time. Any spare time either of us have while not being under attack is generally spent in the map keeping careful track of the people getting air vehicles (especially F16s) and tanks.

Once we get into a game together we survey the room. Taking note of players over level 70 (level you unlock a tank) and level 100 (unlock RPG) and perhaps most important of all, the KD of players in the room. We pay particular attention to people over level 70 with a KD higher than 2 or 3. We also make note of people in the same crews together. Then we get out tank and chopper respectively and set up the trap. As people enter the kill zone we take turns destroying them. New people usually show up to the battle in a personal vehicle so we split the burden and blame for destroying them. After that they are usually in stolen vehicles so we are free to destroy indiscriminately. Once you draw 1 or 2 people into the kill fest most of the room usually follows. Eventually, someone runs away and goes straight for a tank or an F16. To which we adjust our tactics accordingly. Believe me when I tell you they are almost never an issue. It is not uncommon for me to take out 3 or 4 tanks with my tank without taking any damage. And as I said earlier “I eat F16s for breakfast” Our tactics force them into range of my cannon and If I don’t shoot them down they end up crashing. This goes on for roughly 1 to 2 hours before my friend and I say goodnight and call it off. Basically, no one ends up killing us or “taking control of our territory” . We just call it quits for the night

Now the important part for everyone to realize right now is that participation in this slaughterfest is 100% voluntary. Aside from me putting a bounty on you or sending an occasional mugger or mercenary your way, all you gotta do is leave the immediate area to not participate and I can't do squat to you. But it NEVER plays out like that. Once someone with a girl's name kills you once, you keep coming back to try and get your revenge which just plays into our hands.

[rickreim]

[Awesine]

LOL

Get out kid

[Xyn]

[Fail_At_GTA]

Nudes or gtfo.

[Awesine]

LOL

Get out kid

[Eyecandy]

This is you first post and the first to be shot down in flames in

3... 2... 1...

[AceCrossHairs]

This thread is useless OP

 

 

People do not care about a dynamic duo

Edited August 14, 2014 by AceCrossHairs

[RussianCommie]

TL;DR, please.

[Kausus]

Okay then.

[98 in 1]

 

 

 

I need some pictures, or some tangible proof of you and your friend's bad-assery.

Edited August 14, 2014 by Ermac.

[GhostlySentinel]

Summarize it in one word? I got three: Stuck up bitches. Griefing isn't cool. It would be called Joying if it was.

Edited August 14, 2014 by GhostlySentinel

[Phorkz]

[Gridl0k]

Twist: OP has a penis.

[CrazyDog150]

I wasn't thinking if you're cute,I was thinking about how long you can stay in a Lobby and "grief" when a good Jet pilot is in the air..

[Static]

 

 

 

 

[Kausus]

Twist: OP has a penis.

"Trevor made me tuck my johnson between my legs and put on the wig again."

Edited August 14, 2014 by Kausus

[Turkish Turketarian]

Four paragraphs in and I'm bored. Not reading all that.

[TheGoodSgtScooter]

Cool story.

Challenge denied.

[don ovdi' island]

The comments in this thread are where it's at. Thank you OP for the funniest thread of the day.

[Smesi]

Edited August 14, 2014 by Smesi.

[Mr.Nedich]

Guess how many f*cks I give OP. Go on, guess.

[CatchMeTrolling]

Pretty sure you look like a tranny

[hotrats773]

Best trash talk I've read on these forums.

[Jwanna99]

Are you ps3 or xbox? If you're ps3, you're dead meat.

[marco-polo]

You generally decide the value of a woman by what she looks like. Shame on you.

 

Lost interest at this point, damn you men for being this way! No other sex is like that!!

That first reply with the gif was killer Rick

[Static]

Best trash talk I've read on these forums.

That's like saying you're the smartest kid with Down Syndrome..

[Heists]

[GhostlySentinel]

 

 

Best trash talk I've read on these forums.

That's like saying you're the smartest kid with Down Syndrome..

Now THAT'S the best trash talk I've read on these forums!

[don ovdi' island]

I think it'd be fun to take them on. Assuming that book the OP wrote had any truth to it. Got any video's of your slaughter sessions?