Explain Your Last Crime In GTAO To The Arresting Officer

[The Squirrel]

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Edited June 25, 2017 by The Squirrel

[Goten21]

I needed a car, and that old lady was generous enough to just step out of hers

[Cutty Christmas]

Conversation in LSPD car following me.

 

Veteran Officer: Easy rookie, we are gonna let this guy slide.

 

Rookie Officer : But sir, he's been weaving on both sides and his music is way to loud.

 

Veteran Officer: You see that White Dot kid, we are gonna let it slide.

 

Rookie: Ahhh..so the it's the White Dots we have to worry about more.

 

Veteran: You learn fast kid, maybe you will make it to 5 days on the force like me.

[Ayylien]

'I swear officer, I thought my penis tasted funny, I was just asking her to check'

[Gay Tony]

*Opens mouth to explain myself*

 

*Gets shot in face*

[CrysisAverted]

I griefed an entire server in my Jet because the "special" crate didn't drop, seriously who ever the short bus driver for those special crates is needs to get fired

[TrevorEffingPhillips]

I followed some kid in a hoodie eating skittles.

[G_Masta_Phunk]

"You see sir, by stealin the lazer from the military base I am furtherin the revolution against the white supremacy institution that currently runs not only our country but the world. Im supplyin the revolution fighters with comparable freedom fightin' firepower.... So you see -Sir-... by arrestin me for this action, you are further empowering the very institution that is keepin minority and lower class citizens broke, poisoned and suppressed..."

 

[czxc7813128oe5qs8]

I thought it was legal to drive large all terrain military vehicles on the highway, I swear.

[MayoChiki]

"I hired that people to get the job done, if stealing their 4x4s after failing isn't a good excuse then I don't know what's good enough for you, mister"

[Rusty4x4]

Cop: A white Vapid Speedo was seen on satellite images in the Ron Alternates Wind Farm at the time of the string of helicopter crashes. In these satellite images, you can see open rear cargo doors and flashing lights on the back of the van. The front bumper that fell of the van has a license plate registered to your name. Several of our pilots were found dead with multiple gunshot wounds the and others were found burned alive, possibly from collisions with windmills. Over 400 dead police officers and NOOSE agents were also found dead near this wind farm. Who was driving your Vapid Speedo last night?

 

Me: After it was "redecorated" with a sticky bomb for the 9,000th time this month, I had my insurance company replace it. As I live in Paleto Bay, it took me a few hours to drive to Los Santos to retrieve my replacement van. In that time period, my van was stolen by XxXyoloswag420_-_MoDz_-_XxX who proceeded to force me into the back. He told me to use the Combat MG that he left by the rear door to shoot down any helicopters that followed us. Once a NOOSE Granger started shooting at my van, he told me to shoot at it, and any other police vehicles that followed us.

 

Cop: What happened after this?

 

Me: When the van's rear differential blew up we jumped onto a train and hid in a box car until we were several states away. We found an old motorhome stuck in the woods. We "borrowed" a 1986 Declasse Rancher XL to drag it out and used the engine from the Rancher to replace the hydrolocked engine in the motorhome. We drove back to Los Santos and you arrested me, but let XxXyoloswag420_-_MoDz_-_XxX go because he fired his explosive AP Pistol at a bus and said that won't be the last time if you arrest me.

[Thor Shreddington]

"I want to set the record straight: I thought the cop was a prostitute."

-Homer Simpson

[The Squirrel]

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Edited June 25, 2017 by The Squirrel

[saintsrow]

Officer: "Why you got that gun out? You gonna shoot somebody?"

 

Me: "No, officer, I don't want to shoot anybody, but everyone in this game is trying to kill me."

 

Officer: "You're just bein' paranoid, boy."

 

Me; "No, no, officer, it's true, I just stand around on the sidewalk after I do a quick mission for Simeon, and sure enough, within 30 seconds somebody will come along and do a drive-by trying to kill me. I have to be ready."

 

Officer: "No you don't boy; you're just bein' paranoid".

 

Me: speechless for a moment

 

Two stars appear in the corner of the screen

 

Officer: draws guns an starts shooting at me. 2 cop cars show up and they start shooting at me. I run down the street with 10% health and another player drives by and sticky-bombs me.

 

I don't why I the officer thought I was being paranoid ...

[The Lonesome Drifter]

Officer: STOP!!! you violated the law. Pay the fine or serve your...

 

Me: *whips out my Gunsenburg in self defence* but I NEED this sweet-roll. Fimmion won't f**k off until he gets it...

 

Officer: THEN PAY WITH YOUR BLOOD!!!

 

*the imperial city guard whips out his (chuckle) "45 ACP" Handgun, but my 45 ACP Tommy Gun rounds send him backflipping*

 

Oh Damm... Your on about GTA arnt you?

Edited October 29, 2014 by The Lonesome Drifter

[Ms.AirSuperiority]

I was just trying to lower it, and it exploded!

[TCA]

Officer: Do you wanna tell me what happened here?

 

Me: I warned him but he wouldn't listen, officer.

 

Officer: What did you tell him?

 

Me: All you had to do is follow the damn train Marc30499.

[AboveAndBeyoncé]

Officer: Do you wanna tell me what happened here?

 

Me: I warned him but he wouldn't listen, officer.

 

Officer: What did you tell him?

 

Me: All you had to do is follow the damn train Marc30499.

Lmao

[Crunch McThornbody]

"The stupid pedestrian shouldn't have been walking on the sidewalk in the first place officer."

Edited October 29, 2014 by Crunch McThornbody

[saintsrow]

I use the Texas defense: "Your Honor, he just needed killin'. "

 

[ELGBAiZ]

http://youtu.be/YhSXAyybEIM Edited October 29, 2014 by ELGBAiZ

[dorcy]

"I don't know man. I'm just outside the gun store eating a snack and i think these people had like asthma attacks or something. Smog's really bad here. So what kind of gun is that?"

[TIM74UK]

Officer....

 

He was just stood there... not moving.. just standing around with a load of money in his pocket he was obviously vacant,.... what was he gonna do with that money any how??? so I had to sneak behind him and slit his throat to practice my ninja techniques.... he dropped $500 so I took it as no one else was around and someone would have picked it up.

 

Funny thing is he appeared again just down the road.... So I did it again.... and again.... again..... until he stopped dropping money....

 

So I thought i'd give the poor guy a break and left him standing there covered in my dust....

 

Korg.