An Evening with Joysucker

[universetwisters]

An Evening with Joysucker

 

I was walking over to my computer one day after school. It was warm out and the distinct sound of army cadence marching music still rang in my ears, even after I turned my iPod off. I took off my jungle boots, just like the kind my dad used in the army, got some soda pop, and sat down at my computer. As I turned it on and waited for it to start up, I pondered as to why I called it soda "pop". Living in the south, everyone calls it "coke", regardless of the brand. "What kind of coke do you want?" "Pepsi". It's silly. Not silly as in a "ha-ha he tripped and split his skull open" silly, but silly as an oddity. As the computer came on, I checked skype for some updates. Some new progress on the mod? Let me see...ooh, nice windows..."very good" I type out, along with some other congratulatory stuff. But then, as I opened up the soda pop, I heard some voice pop up in my head.

 

"Hey, amigo".

 

I spun around in my chair, trying to figure out where the voice was coming from. It had a very thick Liverpudlian accent, not unlike Ringo Starr's. My eyes darted about the room, trying to figure out the source, when I saw that it was a volleyball with a face crudely drawn onto it, laying on my bed. I had no recollection on how or why it got there, but it's presence shocked me.

 

"So, how are you doing?" The volleyball asked me.

 

"Who are you? What is this?" I asked the volleyball.

 

"I'm Joysucker". the volleyball replied. "I'm here to talk to you".

 

"What do you have to talk to me about?"

 

"You'll see". said Joysucker. "First, tell me about the mod you're working on".

 

"Well", I stammered, nervous about the fact that a living, animate volleyball is asking about details of my hobbies, "It's a mod for GTA, that's about it".

 

"What do you do"? Asked Joysucker.

 

"I make textures and help with the plot".

 

"I'm gonna tell you right now, it's gonna be scrapped".

 

I nervously looked at Joysucker. "What?"

 

"Your plot you and that friend of yours are working on? It's going to be scrapped. Thrown away for something new, your position as a writer will be outsourced to someone else".

 

"I don't get it, why do you think this"? I asked.

 

"It's simple. Nobody likes what you and your friend write. When you look past all the subtle obscure 'New Kids' and 'Ghosts/Aliens' references, your plot will still be thrown out by the creator, regardless of how much work you put into it".

"Why"? I asked, my mouth becoming dryer as we spoke.

 

"Some people in the world are bummers, you should know that. Like the creator of your mod. He said he didn't want a female protagonist because it doesn't fit in GTA. Sure, it's misogynistic and without having any valid reasoning, somewhat sexist, but you should know that by now. No matter how much work you put into it, he'll still scrap it for another plot".

 

"That's not fair"! I stated as I got up from my chair. "My buddy and I put a lot of work into that plot! We won't sit by and let him scrap all of our efforts!"

 

"Oh, that's another thing I wanted to talk to you about. Your buddy, or shall I say more properly, 'buddies'" said Joysucker as he rolled back into some pillows on my bed, as if to relax himself. I'm not sure what was so painful about being a volleyball. Sure, you get hit every now and then, but I'm not a sports guy.

 

"W-what about my buddies"? I asked, nearly beginning to sweat as I anticipated what Joysucker would say.

 

"You see," started off Joysucker, "what you think are your friends aren't really your friends. For starters, all the friends you made here didn't last very long, mostly just ditching you because you were too clingy and talked of nothing but GTA. Another thing are your ex girlfriends. Sure, they weren't the best, but for someone like you, beggars can't be choosers. You complain about your second ex using you for money and stuff and getting that guy to pull a knife on you, but look at what you did to your first girlfriend? Sure, she was a nazi nutter, but she loved you, and I wouldn't be criticizing people over their political beliefs, Mr. I-support-Irish-independence-by-any-and-all-means, And even that buddy of yours who you're going up to Connecticut to see, who's to say she'll be there to let you crash with her, or even if she's serious about inviting you up there? And not even the army will take you. You're weak. You refuse to cut your hair or shave your mustache, and you have the mental state of a psychotic lunatic. There's no way you'll end up fighting and possibly dying for your country like your dad and brother did. You'll be living here for the rest of your life with your alcoholic mother, getting a menial job as a landscaper, weedeating weeds and edging sidewalks until you go nuts and throw yourself in front of the Amtrak." Said Joysucker, almost content with what he said.

 

I dropped to my knees and cried. I cried and cried and cried. Everything he said was true and I just didn't want to admit it to myself. I guess in the end, I was just like what Joysucker said I was all along. After my evening crying with him, I picked myself up, still weary from the crying fit, and whistled for a cab. Once the cab (which happened to have a license plate named "Fresh" and dice in the mirror), I hopped in and called to the cabbie "Yo holmes, to Bel-Air!" I arrived at the house at about seven or eight, then I yelled to the cabbie "Yo holmes, smell you later!" I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there. Willing to take my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.

 

 

If you took it seriously, you were doing it wrong.

I hope you all liked it. Somewhat of an attempt at writing something serious with a positive-ish twist at the end.

 

[Ziggy455]

I read it and found it to be quirky amongst other things- maybe a little too allegorical--Okay, a little too downbeat on yourself perhaps, but a little self doubt is healthy perhaps. I immediately thought of Wilson from Scary Movie 2 and Castaway when I thought of Joysucker. I think you could really have a story of this if you cut down on the self-hatred that was evident in the story, even if you were attempting to be a parody of yourself. You could have a quirky, odd, but somewhat relatable story to tell with Joysucker.

 

Also, the ending...

 

Edited March 14, 2014 by Ziggy455

[universetwisters]

I read it and found it to be quirky amongst other things- maybe a little too allegorical--Okay, a little too downbeat on yourself perhaps, but a little self doubt is healthy perhaps. I immediately thought of Wilson from Scary Movie 2 and Castaway when I thought of Joysucker. I think you could really have a story of this if you cut down on the self-hatred that was evident in the story, even if you were attempting to be a parody of yourself. You could have a quirky, odd, but somewhat relatable story to tell with Joysucker.

 

Also, the ending...

 

 

It's funny you bring up Wilson, since I was trying to think of a way to give Joysucker some sort of Physical appearance (as opposed to being a voice within their head), and I noticed I had a little Wilson replica on my shelf

[Ziggy455]

Volleyball's have a lot of persona in fiction for some odd reason.

 

I think if you took your own advice and stepped away from New Kids and Ghosts/Aliens and put some thought into a comedic story, I'd read it. You have the talent to write some funny sh*t up if you sat down and thought it out. Don't take yourself too seriously, but don't completely demean yourself in the process either.

[universetwisters]

Volleyball's have a lot of persona in fiction for some odd reason.

 

I think if you took your own advice and stepped away from New Kids and Ghosts/Aliens and put some thought into a comedic story, I'd read it. You have the talent to write some funny sh*t up if you sat down and thought it out. Don't take yourself too seriously, but don't completely demean yourself in the process either.

Oh, I still write comedic New Kids & Ghosts/Aliens-esque stuff, but it's not all "in-your-face" as it was before, which is what I was talking about with the mod project. Long story short, the protag's into the Happy Hardcore culture and her buddy is into hunting aliens & ghosts. I can send you a draft if you'd like.

 

But yeah, I'll probably try to alternate between comedic off-the-wall stuff and somber stuff like this.