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Tritium

Funniest things NPCs say.

Recommended Posts

Up2NoGood45

I had been in the same session for 2 full days by last night (afk at night ect) so it was starting to glitch.  I bumped into a guy dressed like a hipster and he has the African American deep voice “I boxed in the Marines” but he ran away!  Hilarious 

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IceDree
15 hours ago, Up2NoGood45 said:

I had been in the same session for 2 full days by last night (afk at night ect) so it was starting to glitch.  I bumped into a guy dressed like a hipster and he has the African American deep voice “I boxed in the Marines” but he ran away!  Hilarious 

Funny you mention that, I came across a hipster who screamed like a girl tonight and I wasn't in the session for long ... Maybe an hour or so.

 

 

He sounded just like Mrs Ronson from Monsters vs Aliens. Cracked me up!

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hugh750
Posted (edited)

this is kind of amusing, sometimes a male npc will call me "goverment stooge".

Edited by hugh750

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Shiloh Comes

Clipping a kerb, doing 6 barrel rolls, hitting a lampost, flipping over shiny side-up and carrying on down the road, to hear that guy say "Woooooooow". That was a keeper.

 

And the woman with the pixie voice saying "you're totally following me" immediately followed by the black guy with the deep voice saying "it's all good".

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AirWolf359
Posted (edited)

npc I almost walked into: "hello? time for an eye transplant, you know"

Edited by AirWolf359

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Up2NoGood45
6 hours ago, hugh750 said:

this is kind of amusing, sometimes a male npc will call me "goverment stooge".

Especially up in Blaine County!

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SqualidCoyote

"Your girl was messed up last night!"
She must be messed up all the time because I hear that a lot.

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happygrowls

nobody:

 

random woman:

"I PICKED UP THE BABY POWDER FOR YOUR CHAFING"

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vicecityrulz

I was selling guns last night in the monster truck and one of the Merryweather guys in the buzzards said "Ah..come on" like he was frustrated he couldn't kill me.  Totally cracked me up.

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kcole4001

Heard a conversation while waiting for the mechanic to deliver my Kuruma for a mission:

 

dude 1 (African American voice); I installed a gps in her car yesterday.

dude 2 (hipster voice): Yeah, yeah.

dude 1: It's OK to spy on your girlfriend.

dude 2: Yeah, yeah.

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Shiloh Comes
Posted (edited)

This isn't a funny one, it's the woman who says "oh dear" like you've just done the last thing to her that she is able to cope with and you've finsihed her off for good. I even stopped jacking cars off women because she kills me when she says it. I find myself apologizing and telling her to have it back.

 

13 hours ago, happygrowls said:

nobody:

 

random woman:

"I PICKED UP THE BABY POWDER FOR YOUR CHAFING"

 

That one always makes me smile, then cringe, then wretch, then smile again.

 

Never use baby powder for chaffing, it will turn to paste and look like someone spread cake icing on your inner thighs. Which I admit, in the right company is a great night in, but on the streets of LS.........

Edited by Shiloh Comes

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J-Scott-D

Hmmm.

 

 

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Up2NoGood45

I was driving an IE Z Type today and I hear this female voice “nice car, overcompensating much?”  

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DPRK
Posted (edited)

my MOC mechanic when I get too close to him: GET OFF OF ME

Edited by DPRK

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Up2NoGood45

At LSIA over the loudspeaker “cars parked in the green zone will be removed and destroyed”

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f(x)ck

"You caught me at the wrong stage of my menstrual cycle" - some hipster NPC

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Battle Scars

Heard an LSPD cop say "I'd tail it out of here you pussy"  - not heard this one before 

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