Share Your Stories

[CrimsonFolo]

One time i met some of the TDB in a game. It was pretty funny.

 

I was in the game with The leader and co leader of North Star Mafia ( i think thats how you spell it ) Anyway i was their air support

 

Me and the other two guys had quite a history with TDB.....

The "war" started when their was 6 TDB in a limo ( I don't even know why ) and the two guys stickybombed them

The other two guys jumped into their car and was doing drive-bys like no tommorow, all i could see was TDB members getting gunned down and ofcourse i played my role by destroying a TDB tank and killing some of them in my jet.

When Suddenly Kingpin_TDB ( Their leader ) joined! I only noticed when he started talking and me and the other two guys went after him. The TDB guys were not that organised and couldn't protect their leader. So the two other guys killed him a few times and i killed him once aswell. Then Kingpin hides on top of a car park with a minigun waiting for the two guys, this is where i came in and obliterated everything on the car park.

Eventually this fight ( Starting in Vinewood, moving to near Simeon's garage ) was in grove street in which the two guys i was allied with got two of their members to join to even it out a little, and i was watching this Hustler guy the entire time and he failed multiple times trying to get a jet. When he eventually got it and was coming over. I hid my blip, sneaked behind him and shot him out of the sky and heard him curse quite a few times. Then the Kingpin guy asked to have a TDM and the two guys said i can join in but i declined as i didn't participate in TDMs.

 

I also had an experience with the Leones and other crews which were quite funny.

[Tao Cheng]

Was about to go for a coffee run but this happened. Moo. 13:19

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1ZzqVK2UEc

[SecretDonkey14]

He's not messy, that is his slams house. You find this out if you watch the long CS where he is telling you about how his "friend" is staying there and you're not to mention anything about the house to anyone. Also, you will occasionally hear him talking to his wife on the phone telling her he's golfing, "FOOOOOUR!" For some reason he just always happens to be there doing his dirty work than his real house.

Or if you just play story mode you figure it out pretty quick.

[InsaneViking3]

Today, I was in a random public session. I was the highest level, and the second highest in the lobby was a level 80-something. Anyway, I was cruising in my JB 700, loving life. As I was crossing a four way intersection, this random NPC car (I think it was an Ocelot) comes flying OUT OF NOWHERE at 200 miles an hour and t-bones me. I flip end over end as I go backwards, wrecking everything on my car that can be wrecked. Bumpers flew off, 3 out of 4 doors came off, engine started smoking, every little bit of glass shattered, my health decreased to half, headlights and tail lights gone, both tires popped on the side that got hit, etc. The NPC got ejected out of her windshield and died (it was a REALLY fat chick!) The side of my car that got hit was bent in so far that it looked like a train had hit it. I laughed my ass off, but it was a bitch driving it to LSC.

[AlienOne]

Tonight was a very depressing night.

 

My friend invited me to this invite only sessions with 4 guys total-

My friend

Friend from middle school

Asswipe from middle school (both got my son through my friend)

And me

 

We f*cked around some in the sewers and crashed planes. Now, I didn't know that my middle school friends were themselves until they messages me through the in-game text.

 

When they revealed themselves, I was dumbfounded and basically had my night ruined. I was in shock.

 

I then ordered my buzzard and launched Operation f*ck You All and killed everyone in the session. (Only 3 people but I still was delighted)

 

 

I'm still rather bumbed about the whole situation though

Edited July 25, 2014 by AlienOne

[hugh750]

tonight i drove my tailgater from paleto bay (my new home) to the casino, i had a $1,000 bounty on my head, when i got to the casino i encountered another player in a supercar, i beeped at him and he beeped back, i drove to one of the stores in sandy shores and stocked up on goodies then robbed and killed the clerk, as soon as i got back in my car he blew me up, but he got a $650.00 insurance bill and no doubt a bad sport warning all for a $1,000 bounty!

[Tiny Rick]

I just had the funniest day in gta online.So a Lvl 14 decided it would be a good idea to try and kill me. I was in my BMX he was in a Dominator. So he charges me I bunny hop over him and comes back and hopped over him again. Cops came after us after a few shots he fired, keep in mind that I didn't even use a pistol. Took Kim through alleys skate parks I even crashed his car buy hustling him to the oncoming lane. I led him to the park at Little Seoul. I was heading for the half pipe, as I neared I swerved around it and watched the dude go sailing past me to the canal. I felt bad after that stunt. I gave him an fully modded phoenix after that and life was good.

Edited July 25, 2014 by AhmadMJamal

[FURIOUSAM31]

one day on my dear phoenix i saw the green car icon requested by simeon near the golf club. I went till there and a 40rs old german hidden from radar, came down the road with his chrome adder with yellow rims and shot me in the face as soon as i got in the car.
I wasnt angry but my revenge started, first of all i wrote him: "you could at least ask me please, i would give you the car" he answered with "AHAHA dirty italian pig without car";
so i smiled and i went straight down till the dockslistening to West Coast Classics, and on the road i also clapped a french kid with 9000$ bounty on his head. arrived at the docks, i saw the german coming down to me,my car was parked at the entrance, so i easilly clapped him in the face and managed to put the resprayed car in simeons garage earning the money HA. so the nazi wrote me other swears and reported me to R* (meanwhile i killed him twice).
So i was on my phoenix in downtown when this nazi follows me with that awful adder, and the french kid who had the bounty was also following me on a buzzard.
I runt away and became a hard run when i had 3 stars wanted, with adder and buzzard chasing me. at a certain point i managed to kill the buzzard but the nazi pedo still was behind me, i was at top speed near strawberry, and that nazy was nearly to put sticky bombs on me, and railway with train going to pass in front of us.... idk how i passed just ONE sec before the train and the german crashed his awful adder and exploded due to his sticky bombs ahah. I had time to write him DANKE and went away on safe in my apartment

[The_Anti-tragedy]

I was in a Free Mode session after completing Rooftop Rumble. A blip was approaching me on my radar. It was a girl on a motorcycle, a Sanchez. She honked, I got on. We drove through West Vinewood. I decided to have a little fun so I shot my Sawed-off Shotgun into the air. I also shot the backs of many cars, and lots of windows too. Then she started shooting at traffic. We had the cops after us as we were shooting pedestrians, and as she drove the Sanchez through Pillbox Hill, I was on the back shooting at police cars' windshields with a shotgun.

I've only now realized that the experience was a lot like the mission Shifting Weight in the Lost and Damned.

 

Anyway, we got to Little Seoul, we lost the cops, and I was shooting more pedestrians. An insane player (red blip) managed to kill us as we drove past him and a couple of other players. We both died, I think, and she picked me up again where I respawned. She drove to her apartment in the Vinewood Hills, we were in her garage. We got out of the garage, now on a sports bike. She accelerated. In front of her apartment was a road that goes downhill, and you can't really see what's down the road. When she started driving, she hit a car that was just out of our sight. She got launched off her bike, I did too. She died, though. I got invited to a Rooftop Rumble session. I accepted.

 

Personally, I thought it was awesome.

[SecretDonkey14]

Tonight was a very depressing night.

 

My friend invited me to this invite only sessions with 4 guys total-

My friend

Friend from middle school

Asswipe from middle school (both got my son through my friend)

And me

 

We f*cked around some in the sewers and crashed planes. Now, I didn't know that my middle school friends were themselves until they messages me through the in-game text.

 

When they revealed themselves, I was dumbfounded and basically had my night ruined. I was in shock.

 

I then ordered my buzzard and launched Operation f*ck You All and killed everyone in the session. (Only 3 people but I still was delighted)

 

 

I'm still rather bumbed about the whole situation though

Reading this makes you look like the asswipe. You had a good time and enjoyed yourself so who cares who it was with. Edited July 25, 2014 by SecretDonkey14

[MadeBrazen]

I was in a Free Mode session after completing Rooftop Rumble. A blip was approaching me on my radar. It was a girl on a motorcycle, a Sanchez. She honked, I got on. We drove through West Vinewood. I decided to have a little fun so I shot my Sawed-off Shotgun into the air. I also shot the backs of many cars, and lots of windows too. Then she started shooting at traffic. We had the cops after us as we were shooting pedestrians, and as she drove the Sanchez through Pillbox Hill, I was on the back shooting at police cars' windshields with a shotgun.

I've only now realized that the experience was a lot like the mission Shifting Weight in the Lost and Damned.

 

Anyway, we got to Little Seoul, we lost the cops, and I was shooting more pedestrians. An insane player (red blip) managed to kill us as we drove past him and a couple of other players. We both died, I think, and she picked me up again where I respawned. She drove to her apartment in the Vinewood Hills, we were in her garage. We got out of the garage, now on a sports bike. She accelerated. In front of her apartment was a road that goes downhill, and you can't really see what's down the road. When she started driving, she hit a car that was just out of our sight. She got launched off her bike, I did too. She died, though. I got invited to a Rooftop Rumble session. I accepted.

 

Personally, I thought it was awesome.

 

Well one thing is quite clear.

 

You luuurve her x smoochie smoochie smoochie

 

Obviously the odds are high that she was a dude.

[Virtual-Antics]

Story 1. When will people learn that it's a tactical error to use a vehicle or plane as cover?

 

I was hiding inside the little building next to the hangar at the Grand Senora airstrip. A player ran behind a vestra (on my right) and started shooting me. I just whipped out an RPG, blew him up and moved on.

 

 

Story 2. Someone in a sprunk mallard plane just tried to kamikaze me near the vespucci helipad. He exploded on the underside of my annihilator and I burst out laughing.

 

I was still flying, with smoke billowing out of the back, and made an emergency landing at the airport.

 

Then I killed him twice again. First time he drove at me. The second time I went off radar and climbed onto some boxes and shot him down while he ran off to the right.

Edited July 25, 2014 by Virtual-Antics

[StormerBoy]

 

Chastity is a lying f*cking c*nt!

 

 

So I was in the Strip Club, right? Chastity and I are interacting by way of her dancing, and me throwing money at her. Before that commenced however, I had called her up on my phone and invited her to my apartment. Anywho, I leave the club and almost as soon as I have started to drive away in my pimped up SUV, I get a message saying "Chastity got bored of waiting outside your apartment and has left" - what a f*cking lying bitch. I had only just left her in the club, so she couldn't possibly have been at my apartment.

 

 

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's liars! How do I delete her as a contact from my phone?

[Voorhees177]

I parachuted from a titan, hit a billboard and died.

[MadeBrazen]

Erm story, is a bit longer than ^^.. but hopefully equally as compelling.

 

LUCKY DUCK

You know when things just go your way? Where I come from, after reading this little tale, you would call me a 'jammy bastard'. A little story about being one lucky sob.

Well I’d been roaming around a lobby with a $1000 bounty on my head for a while, but not a soul was paying any attention to me for such poor pickings.

So I was casually shopping for some new threads at the Binco near the East-Side LCS, finished up and made to leave. Did the routine mini-map expansion to check the coast was clear, noticing a player a couple of blocks up the street, not too close but close enough to have one of my eyes roll about to follow him.

Well I open the door into the street and in the same instant I hear the unmistakeable sound of a silenced sniper bullet whip past my earhole and bury itself in the Binco door window. Hmm, close. Of course, the fear of god made me jump and hot foot it over to my vehicle, zig-zaggin and jumping about like I had a ferret in my pants.

Thankfully the fella was not a top gun hot shot and I made it to my car and zipped off through the tunnel near the bus garage, headed for I don’t actually remember where.

Anyway the guy was hot for me so gave chase, had me nipping down alleyways thinking I’m Jean Reno. I happened across an alleyway I had not been down before (and i’ve been down a few, nomsayin *eyebrows* ;p) and noticed a ladder off to my side heading up. I’ve always liked going up so I hopped out and hopped up.

Im on the roof now, this guy still using his wonky sniper to try and shoot, and I’m offering him some bullets back from old trusty. He soon gets bored of missing and starts doing laps around the bottom of the building, looking for a way up. Fine by me, I offer him a trail of grenades to show him the way.

All of a sudden and from out of nowhere a bloody great tank appears at one end of my alleyway, where my new friend is at the other. So the building is shaking now this tank is jizzin all over the place, clearly a fan of carnage. He is right up against the building too so no way can he get an angle on me, but is taking shots anyway.

So seeing as this guy is not my fan either I decide to send down some presents for him too, little parcels of C4 to be precise. Except I wasn’t precise, three of em stuck on the side of the opposite building like two storeys up. Well one of em did land somewhere down there, maybe on him or near him so I figure will get a little damage in and see what he does next. Well the next thing he did was blow the hell up! One sticky, he must’ve been limping already. Result.

In the meantime, my original admirer has cheekily made his way up to my nest, thinking he’s got the jump on me. His timing was unfortunate, because he was a sitting duck when I shot him back down to earth.

Im thinking it might be time to leave, as Tankless and Lover Boy are both fuming at the bottom of my Tower, certainly feels like death is not far away. Be careful what you wish for people, unbelievably and again out of nowhere a flippin’ Buzzard comes screaming at me from out of the sky, lobbing missiles like its mardi gras.

Thankfully im a lucky pup, as had a wall there to tuck in behind while the pilot is trying to vaporise me. Not sure what he was doing next, maybe fumbling about with his controls trying to remember his San Andreas flight school training, but he was hovering there, just asking for me to say hello. Weapon of choice?: Combat MG.

I gave him the old rat-a-tat-tat and then some all over the pilot cabin. Sucker didn’t stand a chance. So there he is slumped over his joystick and the bleeding helicopter lurches forward, yes at me! Jesus, I’m thinking. Was quite the sight as it came flying at me but as luck was loving me that day, my little wall kept me safe as the birdy spewed its guts in a ball of flame against my treetop.

Not sure what Tankless and Lover boy were doing but now they had Birdman to play with. I was very much ready for bed by now and creeped off to the other side of my building, checked my inventory but not before rubbing my four-leaf clover- sweet, I had a ‘chute.

So yes, I jumped off the building and in amongst the tank wreckage there just happened to be a nice little family car for me to hop in and get away, clean as fresh shorn sheep, but twice as content. And that is what I did, living with a little but of luck to tell you the tale today.

Edited July 25, 2014 by Bandalamente

[The_Anti-tragedy]

 

I was in a Free Mode session after completing Rooftop Rumble. A blip was approaching me on my radar. It was a girl on a motorcycle, a Sanchez. She honked, I got on. We drove through West Vinewood. I decided to have a little fun so I shot my Sawed-off Shotgun into the air. I also shot the backs of many cars, and lots of windows too. Then she started shooting at traffic. We had the cops after us as we were shooting pedestrians, and as she drove the Sanchez through Pillbox Hill, I was on the back shooting at police cars' windshields with a shotgun.

I've only now realized that the experience was a lot like the mission Shifting Weight in the Lost and Damned.

 

Anyway, we got to Little Seoul, we lost the cops, and I was shooting more pedestrians. An insane player (red blip) managed to kill us as we drove past him and a couple of other players. We both died, I think, and she picked me up again where I respawned. She drove to her apartment in the Vinewood Hills, we were in her garage. We got out of the garage, now on a sports bike. She accelerated. In front of her apartment was a road that goes downhill, and you can't really see what's down the road. When she started driving, she hit a car that was just out of our sight. She got launched off her bike, I did too. She died, though. I got invited to a Rooftop Rumble session. I accepted.

 

Personally, I thought it was awesome.

 

 

Obviously the odds are high that she was a dude.

 

I suspected this.

[OurJud]

You know when things just go your way? Where I come from, after reading this little tale, you would call me a 'jammy bastard'. A little story about being one lucky sob.

You tell a good story, Bandalmente. I'd never normally read a post that long, but you kept me hooked.

[CaptainMental]

tonight i drove my tailgater from paleto bay (my new home) to the casino, i had a $1,000 bounty on my head, when i got to the casino i encountered another player in a supercar, i beeped at him and he beeped back, i drove to one of the stores in sandy shores and stocked up on goodies then robbed and killed the clerk, as soon as i got back in my car he blew me up, but he got a $650.00 insurance bill and no doubt a bad sport warning all for a $1,000 bounty!

Uhm. One does not get a insurance bill or bad sport warning from blowing up vehicles that contains a player with a bounty...

[slohbur]

The Start of a Revolution!

Benefactor Glendale

 

Introduced in the I'm Not a Hipster Update, the Glendale its a rare gem of the '90s. Featuring a powerful V6, this car will put most modern sports cars to shame.

 

The simplicity of the exterior together with its gold paint job and unique interior brings a nostalgic feel i've never experienced.

 

This Glendale is a perfect example of what can be done when you take an old luxury Euro and inject a bit of creativity and a strong dose of style.

Then there’s the looks. Sure looks are completely subjective, but I think most will agree I speak about how handsome these vintage luxury cars are.

This goes for both the exterior…

 

… and the interior. Open the door on one of these cars and you’ll be greeted by the aroma of leather and an overall feeling of class that I think is missing from many of today’s tech-laden luxury cars.

 

What’s not to like?

 

The attention to detail in this cars surprises me. From the roof rack...

 

...to the lowrider wheels - everything fits so perfectly. A combination of pure joy and history.

 

Under the hood you’ll find the stock diesel six cylinder engine, combined with a huge air filter and a turbo to increase performance.

 

The Glendale is surprisingly the fastest car in the sedan category, having a top speed that just barely touches 200 mph.

Will the Glendale start a vintage luxury car revolution? I take no responsibility for this causing you to start building a well-aged European cruiser of your own.

Bonus Images!

 

 

Benefactor Glendale

Engine

Original diesel six-cylinder

Driveline

Rear-wheel drive

Suspension

Race Suspension

Wheels/Tires

Split Six with refinished lips and dark brown painted centers, Atomic tires

Exterior

Original chrome bumpers front and rear, custom RGB gold paint, original window glass, Big Bore exhaust, roof rack

Interior

Original interior

[Con9mm]

Driving around last night and I saw this and said, damn, is that a Rosie O'Donnell booger?

No it was just an asteroid, I tried to load it up on my solid gold Bati but I had the wrong suspension....

I had to climb it.

Look Ma', Im on top of the world!! Actually just on top of this huge pile of Elephant dung....but whatever.

Here I am wearing my Asteroid Jacket....Suck it, Kanye West!

[Tao Cheng]

 

Driving around last night and I saw this and said, damn, is that a Rosie O'Donnell booger?

No it was just an asteroid, I tried to load it up on my solid gold Bati but I had the wrong suspension....

I had to climb it.

Look Ma', Im on top of the world!! Actually just on top of this huge pile of Elephant dung....but whatever.

Here I am wearing my Asteroid Jacket....Suck it, Kanye West!

 

Glitch???

 

Gang Attack...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxA_uMJ6oSE

[AlienOne]

I disconnected from my own playlist

Edited July 26, 2014 by AlienOne

[Dottie]

Bought a topless Voltic
gets painted roof voltic

f*ck logic

Edited July 26, 2014 by Winning001

[MayoChiki]

Bought a topless Voltic

gets painted roof voltic

f*ck logic

 

You don't know how much I envy you.

[Sw1ft562]

anything ever escalate quickly when you drop down into your first session of the day?

 

there was some racist guy (not gonna post his gt) talking about how much he hated the hunter.. even tho its not even in the game (officially) ..and how bad it would be if white people were able to buy a jet or a hunter. lol anyways.. i go get a jet while hes still talking about all that sh*t.. then i head towards him and the 2 guys he was with.. and then boom. i killed his friend/s and he goes --> ''see.. see what i mean.. i was just talkin about how people with jets and hunters are gonna turn this into battlefield''

 

after that he got a helo but i didnt kill him just yet.... i flew by like i was about to.. but then i just let him go. i knew he was heading to the military base anyways. so once he got close.. i flew over there to kill em before he landed.. but he bailed out in the air and i crashed while trying to hit em with the jet. then i get killed by soldiers and respawn on the highway.. he gets in a jet and goes --> ''oh.. somebody lost their jet.. and hes about to spawn on the highway.''

 

i was ready. i dont think he was. lol so he flew over the water to turn around and line up those cannons.. then i sniped him out of the jet and it crashed by me on the highway. he was like --> ''nah.. what.. im done with you swift. im done. he just sniped me out of the jet. ..yea.. he sniped me out of it while i was flying.. im gone.. im out of here. anybody wanna do a mission?'' player left.

 

heavy sniper for the win

[Con9mm]

Driving up around Vinewood Hills, drove past this house and the garage started to go up, checked the other homes and their garages didnt open, maybe this house will be available someday for us. If you looked putside the garage, up on a hill you can. See the Observatory.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited July 27, 2014 by Day Reaper

[Con9mm]

"UP ALL NIGHT TO GET LUCKY....."




We up all night to get lucky....





Even ya' Mom showed up to tonights Hangman Avenue Pool Party!
Word. She didnt drink tho. Hit the bong several times tho.

Edited July 28, 2014 by Day Reaper

[siriochan]

Last night I got a bounty on my red-head, and decided to take a break without having other players trying to kill me.

 

So I took a MAverick and went on top of Maze Tower, the perfect spot when you want to relax

 

Some low level players tryed to approach me, and they all wandered around the tower for some minute before going away

 

Then, a chopping chopper sound: finally, one player smarter than others approached in a Buzzard!

 

We began a duel, Buzzard VS Heavy Sniper, and I managed to damage his chopper enough to make him go away...but a few minutes later, I heard again the sound of a distant helicopter. Heavy Sniper in my arms, I saw him landing on top of the nearby skyscraper and being off-radar

 

Nice try, but never understimate the sound awareness of a paranoid! Waited for the chopper to land, aimed at the cockpit that just emerged from the building edge, got the kill.

 

 

OK, now he is on the roads, time to fly away! Jumped from Maze Tower and gently parachuted on a lower building, called MMI for heli extraction, and that dumb pilot tried to land just a few meters away from the helipad The-now-useless Maverick is floating near the buliding side, I was contemplating the idiocy of the pilot, when suddenly KABOOM!

 

My hunter blew it, probally thinking that I was in it (just was close) I laughed hard thinking of that Simpson scene where the family car crashes in a tree, then we see the whole family inside the room saying "Wow, that could have been us!" (or something similar)

 

My lovely hunting player didn't give up, another Maverick landed on top of Maze Tower, this time coming from a blocked line of sight, so i was only able to shot a couple of bullets at its rotors as a warning. I had the edge of the helepad in my sights, ready to pop off the head of the other player, just though that maybe it was better to go into cover, when he finally blew my head off, without me being able to spot him...and take is hardly earned 1000$ bounty

 

I texted him a surprised "Ouch.", and he prompltly answered: "On the roof for a 1k bounty?"

"It's funny to see people spending money to catch me ", I replyed.

"I spent no money " (he took the helis from helipads, not Pegasus, and the Lester money is not so much)

"I trew away that 1k for the heli you blew away, instead "

 

We had a good laught at the fun we had and became friends

 

 

 

[GIRR]

A few nights ago, I was just driving along the freeway on my bike, I was too tired to really do anything thankfully it was a quiet lobby, I was on youtube listening to a guy rip into Domislive and after about the second or third lap around the map I noticed I was coming up on a white dot. I started to panic. I'm on a motorcycle with no armour on and chances are this guy is in a car. I figured I would just pass him by and what would be, would be. From that point started a friendly race, followed by flying around in planes and heli's, to swimming in the ocean. Unfortunately he left at some point.

[GIRR]

I was driving along the beach causally running over beach goers when I saw the most horrifying nightmare inducing thing ever. An incredibly fat woman in a two piece.