I Have a Confession to Make

[G U M M I]

I cannot grow a beard.

 

I give all of my characters beards in video games, and even my main character in my story has a beard later on in his life. But me? Oh I couldn't grow a beard even if I tried. The most I've accumulated are strands, and even those took a couple of years to grow. I don't know if my ancestors were baby faced or slow genes, but it'll take me 5 years or so to grow a goatee, and maybe even longer to grow a full face.

[-l-]

I never fainted, until now I was close to one with my 27 years.

[Interface]

I have an anal fissure. Is that ok if I'm not that much in pain? Or should I have a surgery?

[Mr. Scratch]

Does this place look like WebMD or something?

[Smith John]

I never liked Friends f*ck that show

You're dead inside.

[GTA_CAT]

I have an anal fissure. Is that ok if I'm not that much in pain? Or should I have a surgery?

Well those things tend to get worse over the time... Also you can get an infection.

Btw this guy helped me not to eat ice cream after diner, and in this case help stands for good meaning

[Jeansowaty]

I once tried to hang myself.

[Rhoda]

Even if you think/thought otherwise, I'm glad you weren't successful.

[Jeansowaty]

Even if you think/thought otherwise, I'm glad you weren't successful.

Thanks man, that day was Godawful though, a bunch of stuff just went on my head at once. Right now everything is mostly chill, thankfully.

[G U M M I]

I threw my parakeets away. f*ck it, I said it, and my goddamn dog keeps staring at me, judging me. I don't want to see another animal right now. I'm f*cking done.

 

All the chirping, the nonstop slamming of cage doors, throwing food and water everywhere, screaming at each other, I'm f*cking done. Those two f*ckers can go live the rest of their bird lives in the woods. I chucked them across the fence, and they flew on to some branches.

 

That's it. Haven't told my mom or sister, I just gave up. Wasn't no making a bird docile or whatever, these two made the past few days a living hell. I bought one a week ago, and another 3 or so days ago. I quit. They can live amongst the rest of their avian brethren but they ain't living here.

 

I don't want no judging or whining about how could I do this and that, it was my money I threw away, and it was well wasted.

[Andreaz1]

I threw my parakeets away. f*ck it, I said it, and my goddamn dog keeps staring at me, judging me. I don't want to see another animal right now. I'm f*cking done.

 

All the chirping, the nonstop slamming of cage doors, throwing food and water everywhere, screaming at each other, I'm f*cking done. Those two f*ckers can go live the rest of their bird lives in the woods. I chucked them across the fence, and they flew on to some branches.

 

That's it. Haven't told my mom or sister, I just gave up. Wasn't no making a bird docile or whatever, these two made the past few days a living hell. I bought one a week ago, and another 3 or so days ago. I quit. They can live amongst the rest of their avian brethren but they ain't living here.

You've got problems.

 

 

I don't want no judging or whining about how could I do this and that, it was my money I threw away, and it was well wasted.

No one cares what you want or not. Edited March 27, 2018 by Andreaz1

[trip]

Those two f*ckers can go live the rest of their bird lives in the woods.

Except they'll just die since the parakeet is not a native bird to your area.

 

So you just killed a couple of pet birds.

 

Couldn't have just done the responsible thing and returned them to the pet store or find a home where they actually do have a chance to live out their lives?

[theNGclan]

I have considered seeing an escort and that makes me feel pretty pathetic lol.

[Guest]

I threw my parakeets away. f*ck it, I said it, and my goddamn dog keeps staring at me, judging me. I don't want to see another animal right now. I'm f*cking done.

 

All the chirping, the nonstop slamming of cage doors, throwing food and water everywhere, screaming at each other, I'm f*cking done. Those two f*ckers can go live the rest of their bird lives in the woods. I chucked them across the fence, and they flew on to some branches.

 

That's it. Haven't told my mom or sister, I just gave up. Wasn't no making a bird docile or whatever, these two made the past few days a living hell. I bought one a week ago, and another 3 or so days ago. I quit. They can live amongst the rest of their avian brethren but they ain't living here.

 

I don't want no judging or whining about how could I do this and that, it was my money I threw away, and it was well wasted.

 

hey guess what dont get pets if you dont want to look after them you f*cking piece of sh*t

[make total destroy]

I threw my tropical birds out. f*ck those stupid birds. I bought one and figured "f*ck it, why not get another" 3 days later. What a f*cking disaster. I put them in the same cage, and for whatever reason, they both just started squawking at each other and flapping their wings about on some bird sh*t.

 

I'm a terrific problem solver, and a genuine animal lover, so I just hurled them, cage and all, over a fence and watched them fly up into a tree. From there they can start their 48 hours of life.

 

[Rhoda]

Your attempts to come across as nihilistic and cynical are haphazard at best. You're not going to get much in the way of criticism when it comes to how you spend your money, but you deserve every single bit of stick you get for your complete disregard to an animal's safety. I don't know if it's some character you're trying to build, or something you're hiding, but I guarantee that in a few years when that shield crumbles you'll think back to just how hard you tried to come across as this societal outcast and cringe.

 

I was going to go off and post more but do you know something? It isn't worth it. I will say this though - you don't deserve to keep that dog. If you're as reckless with your dog as you are with birds, I fear for its wellbeing. Seriously, I do.

[Leftist Bastard]

I threw my tropical birds out. f*ck those stupid birds. I bought one and figured "f*ck it, why not get another" 3 days later. What a f*cking disaster. I put them in the same cage, and for whatever reason, they both just started squawking at each other and flapping their wings about on some bird sh*t.

 

I'm a terrific problem solver, and a genuine animal lover, so I just hurled them, cage and all, over a fence and watched them fly up into a tree. From there they can start their 48 hours of life.

 

 

something tells me this didn't really happen

[G U M M I]

I haven't tried to keep up with anyone since graduation.

 

Like seriously, and then it gets tiresome when my mom, and older friend start to ask about this person, and your friends and whatnot. I don't have any friends. Not anymore, and I don't really care. Whatever friendships I had, ended when I graduated. I didn't attempt to hang out with anyone, call anyone, text anyone, nothing. The closest contact I've had with a person since, was clicking on their Facebook profile, and I only check Facebook, I don't use it.

 

So imagine my responses to questions like "Where are your friends?" "What have you been doing lately?" "Do you hangout?" "You just go to school and go back home?" As if it's their attempt to make me feel bad about my decision. The entire time I was in school, I knew that those "friendships," were actually acquaintances, and on a time trial.

 

Everything's simple right now, how I like it. I don't have to talk to anyone, I don't have to be here, do this, fake this smile, fake this friendship, none of that high school bullsh*t. That's kind of why I dread the day of my dog dying because then I'd REALLY be alone.

 

Until then, f*ck friendship.

Edited March 31, 2018 by Lucius M. Galloway

[Leftist Bastard]

Socializing is healthy. Like you don't have to be a party animal but valid relationships and valid friendships are good, even if few.

[G U M M I]

Gonna be 100% truthful here.

 

Writing, to me, hasn't always been about being creative, and exploring all of these fantasies and whatnot. Most of it is fantasy, but it was never built off of peaches and cream. It was built off of neglect, and lack of love. It is a way for me to channel my feelings, specifically abandonment, into a world that never will exist.

 

My main character is a better me, a super, antihero me, so I have no heroes or anything. I've made sure that my main character's mother is extremely loving, and never neglecting, something my mother failed to do.

 

You know how hard it is to talk and relate to someone who has the attention span of a goldfish? I play mental f*cking mazes every single day when I *try* to write, so I can't really vent or talk to anyone but myself about it.

 

In my story, my character's father is murdered, and his mother becomes a widow. She remarries after he gets his own wife, and that's something that I will have to channel my own feelings and experiences in because I will soon be going through this.

 

You might be thinking, how do you feel like you're losing someone who never really understood you or tried to? Someone who obsesses over some old fling?

 

She talks about not leaving us behind, but tells her friends she's going to run off with this person. When I have no regard for someone, I do not acknowledge them by name, gender, or anything else. They are just a person, not even that to me, because they do not matter.

 

I want to stop the faking, I'm tired of the bullsh*t. Wanting to "talk about it" and how I'm "set in my ways." It goes like this. Say it and mean it, don't beat around the bush, or overcomplicate it. Let me know your true feelings, don't lie to my face.

 

My phone is my mobile journal. I keep all this sh*t locked up inside just to vent about it on the internet. I'd rather be alone because I don't like this feeling. With pets you don't have to experience this sh*t, they live and they die. You don't have to worry about leaving, cheating, lying, none of this human bullsh*t.

 

As I sit on this concrete, I look into the future, picturing it's me, and only me, all alone in a big house, cash in my pockets, and still writing my heart out. No one helped me, so I won't help anyone. My feeling of being alone is not because of friends or whatnot, it's because I'm losing the one person who I can't escape from. They're going off to find some $100K home and I'll be left to fend for myself in the real world. They talk about holidays, and visiting and all I think about is "never, busy, better things to do." She talks about being close...I think "Sure."

 

You know how they say whatever doesn't kill you will make you stronger? I'll become stronger, but I'll also become bittersweet. She talks about this guy like he can do all these things for us, us, us, when it's really all about you, you, you.

 

I don't need a father figure, a leader, or anyone else. All I need is peace and quiet, seclusion, and the necessities. But when sh*t starts to revolve around one person, it ruins everything. It ruins whatever relationship you and I have. It ruins the good times, and the memories, and future. It ruins...the future.

Edited March 31, 2018 by Lucius M. Galloway

[Andreaz1]

All I need is peace and quiet, seclusion, and the necessities. But when sh*t starts to revolve around one person, it ruins everything.

Your connection to reality is so non existent I'm surprised you haven't floated away yet. Edited March 31, 2018 by Andreaz1

[HeavyDuke]

Wished a certain moment today would have last forever. At least its a good memory which is also a nice thing to have. I hate the first thing comes to mind is how good things never last forever because so many things always go downhill so fast turning good memories into a pain to even think about which at it self only shows how great the good moments were in the first place. Well who knows who things play out. Gosh i love life, the good and the bad. Things can be so good, even if only for a day.

[BS_BlackScout]

I haven't tried to keep up with anyone since graduation. Whatever friendships I had, ended when I graduated. I didn't attempt to hang out with anyone, call anyone, text anyone, nothing.

So imagine my responses to questions like "Where are your friends?" "What have you been doing lately?" "Do you hangout?" "You just go to school and go back home?" As if it's their attempt to make me feel bad about my decision. The entire time I was in school, I knew that those "friendships," were actually acquaintances, and on a time trial.

Everything's simple right now, how I like it. I don't have to talk to anyone, I don't have to be here, do this, fake this smile, fake this friendship, none of that high school bullsh*t. That's kind of why I dread the day of my dog dying because then I'd REALLY be alone.

Until then, f*ck friendship.

I can relate to the feeling to some extent. My reasons for it may not be as valid. I can believe that if I were to tell my motives some would look at me and say "You are full of crap".

To be fair, most of the times I genuinely believe that I am full of sh*t. Anyway...

 

"The entire time I was in school, I knew that those "friendships," were actually acquaintances, and on a time trial."

 

Pretty much how I see it. People that come and go in a flash. One day you are happy with them, the other everyone is gone and away, and you don't hear from them anymore.

I am not capable of understanding how this works and how people manage to get over it. Is that how friendships are supposed to be?

Good people come into my life and then after all of a sudden they disappear and I am supposed to just "replace" them with someone else? Then, later in life, I am "supposed" to build a family to have a so supposed happiness (which isn't guaranteed, family can bring a plethora of problems) so I won't feel alone? Sounds interesting.

 

Perhaps, like some would say: "You are too young to understand. You have yet to grow up and see a lot about the world we live in so your views will change."

 

I think so? I can't tell. Each year I tend to change my perspectives and believe less on what people have told me along my whole life.

Maybe I am just an entitled person who deserves to be judged to death instead of helped in some way. Although I have to be honest, I don't seem to want to help myself.

 

"Until then, f*ck friendship."

 

I have finished High School. Now, I also don't feel like socializing anymore. (I know we all need society, we shouldn't hide in a bunker, unhealthy, etc.)

Maybe it's because I have prejudices, maybe I am too judgmental. It's a mess here.

I look around and I just don't seem to click with anyone else. Or everyone looks creepy enough for me to want to keep distance even.

Not having friendships does bother me to some extent but at the same time I don't know... Do I really need it? When I had them, it never was too serious to be fair...

Anyway, I wasn't planning to write this wall of text...

 

Don't take me too seriously by the way.

Edited April 1, 2018 by BlackScout

[make total destroy]

 

I threw my tropical birds out. f*ck those stupid birds. I bought one and figured "f*ck it, why not get another" 3 days later. What a f*cking disaster. I put them in the same cage, and for whatever reason, they both just started squawking at each other and flapping their wings about on some bird sh*t.

 

I'm a terrific problem solver, and a genuine animal lover, so I just hurled them, cage and all, over a fence and watched them fly up into a tree. From there they can start their 48 hours of life.

 

 

something tells me this didn't really happen

 

good work detective

[Leftist Bastard]

 

 

I threw my tropical birds out. f*ck those stupid birds. I bought one and figured "f*ck it, why not get another" 3 days later. What a f*cking disaster. I put them in the same cage, and for whatever reason, they both just started squawking at each other and flapping their wings about on some bird sh*t.

 

I'm a terrific problem solver, and a genuine animal lover, so I just hurled them, cage and all, over a fence and watched them fly up into a tree. From there they can start their 48 hours of life.

 

 

something tells me this didn't really happen

 

good work detective

 

thanks i worked hard for the badge

[cleomaster]

Yes, I was the one who cheated.

[ProKiller93]

there should be a game about bud spencer and terence hill tbh

[feckyerlife]

there should be a game about bud spencer and terence hill tbh

what would it be about? how to be italian and fake your name?

[G U M M I]

I don't feel sorry for others.

 

Never have. Never will.

 

I "had" this one "friend" who acted like nothing was wrong with her, and threw all her problems on me later on. This person also is confused, she is a girl, who believes she's a boy, wants people to use her guy name, and not refer to her as a girl, but a guy, but gets mad when you don't, and uses girls bathrooms.

 

 

Get the f*ck out of here

 

 

I have zero tolerance for that. I can get around the fact you've convinced yourself you're this and that, but don't be trying to put me on the crazy train with you. She also went on and on about gay rights, and being depressed and sh*t, and yeah, she sent me over 30 messages about wanting to die, and depression this, and that. I see it like this, if you complain about something so much and you're not doing anything to change it, don't go on about it. If something is wrong, I fix it. I'm not going to complain about it, I'm stronger than that, mentally, anyhow.

 

That being said, she would get mad at me because I wouldn't care about her like she wanted me to. She'd get mad at me because I stopped caring. But that was a long time ago, not recent. My teacher, when I was in the 11th grade, gave me some pretty lethal advice. This was the time where I was conscious about everything, people, my surroundings, myself. I had breakdowns and everything, and he showed me the way. He showed me a video called This is Water. I don't remember it exactly, but I do remember a line. "You get to consciously decide what has meaning and what doesn't." That line pretty much hit me hard. All these people mean nothing to me. Everything is about me, for me. f*ck everybody else. He told me that I shouldn't waste my time caring about other people because I couldn't control them ( had a very low tolerance for stupid sh*t, and the things that came out of people's mouths, got under my nails, and I felt like I had to run away a lot, and that triggered my breakdowns). And for the rest of that day, and my life...I've been humbled, by not caring.

 

So if I seem selfish and insincere about someone or their situation, it's because I don't want to be that weak person that I was again. I can pretend that I care, but I don't. I feel like I can finally take a breath when I'm not worrying about other people.

Edited April 4, 2018 by Lucius M. Galloway

[Guest]

it must get tiring pushing this edgy facade 24/7 chill out smoke some weed or some sh*t bro