I Have a Confession to Make

[trip]

 

I'm 24yrs old and I never had a driver's license. I barely even know how to drive a car. I do know how to drive a boat and a tractor though.

[...]Hell, if I lived in NYC or Philly I would't bother driving...[...]

 

My wife is almost 50 and doesn't have her license. When we lived in center city I didn't even own a car. My last car was 16 years old and had just broken 40k miles when I traded it in.

[unbid]

Anyway...confession of the day...

 

Two summers ago I got a handjob on the beach with other people around. And for the record, sand doesn't help.

Jellyfish is better than sand, IMO.

 

or, y'know, sunblock lotion.

[Flachbau]

My least favorite passenger when I went driving would be my mom. She nags a lot everytime I go over 40 mph or overtaking cars on the street

I feel you on this one. My mom does the same exact sh*t, even though I've had a lot of time on the road so far. She does it especially on the highway. Speed limit on the interstate here is 55, yet people go 60+, and yet she yells at me for going too slow.

 

Parking is also a bitch to do when she's in the car, mostly because she wants me like half a cm away from the street curb.

[Queen]

Meh...I don't even live with my mother and she still wants to call me when it's foggy or something to tell me to be careful. And when she's actually with me she'll dramatically grasp whatever is closest for dear life as I approach a God damn stop sign. But you know what, I'm actually just like her when my fiancee is driving. Good lord does she scare the sh*t out of me when she's driving.

[MCMXCII]

Well I still plan on getting it in the next few years because I want to get a motorcycle and it'll also make it easier for me to go visit my father and grandparents and to just also travel. My state is a beautiful state and I would like to experience it's beauty on a motorcycle.

 

I sure as hell won't be taking my Mom anywhere if she's going to do what y'alls mothers do lol

[sreyazsec]

I'm sure most of you understand the hunger after a night of smoking, drinking and generally being a mess.. I took it to a new level (for me).

What was my regular? Six double cheeseburgers. Six, and yes I ate them all without problem.

 

I'm a cock gobbler and I love to gobble cocks.

Edited June 8, 2016 by ceszayers

[Voodoo]

You're just lucky you don't have White Castles over there. Ten sliders with a raincoat and a box of nails makes for an interesting morning after.

 

E - Example:

 

[The Dedito Gae]

Curly fries?

 

 

What kind of god would allow curly fries?

[Queen]

Those are crinkle fries, my good sir.

 

These are curly fries.

 

 

And they are delicious.

[ciel]

I can hate myself and still be in a relationship.

Edited May 31, 2016 by Candy Suxxx

[DarkSavageDeathlyCloud]

iam drunk rightnow, seems this sh*tt is indeed more potent then im used to, whoopsydoo

also in the mean time im watching prank videos in the form of "wtf is dis sh*t" stuff

some praks seem yo go horible i think, but whoops, drunk typing, gtg

[Hunter]

I can hate myself and still be in a relationship.

Don't be hating on yourself, you seem cool enough.

 

Signed,

 

Icantthinkofonew.

[drifter.]

I think I want a girlfriend.

I've been a few places and I've noticed a few girls checking me out. That was really all it took for me to want to get back into dating.

[drifter.]

I think I want a girlfriend.

I've been a few places and I've noticed a few girls checking me out. That was really all it took for me to want to get back into dating.

This feeling quickly wore off.

[Flachbau]

Try Tinder, or one of those dating apps. You might find someone there.

[Femme Fatale]

True Faith by New Order is the most played song on my phone, mainly because I became addicted to it after I heard it on the Luka Magnotta video...And it was that video that made me a huge fan of the soundtrack dissonance trope, since the fruity song didn't match what was happening in the video...

[Eliz]

I confess I really don't like attending functions, like marriages, college fest, seminar, etc. And I dislike Indian marriages in general. They are not only obnoxiously loud, but also very time-consuming, and the thing that pisses me the most off is that - I have to wait in a line for a long f*cking time just to get a picture taken with the bride and the groom.

[Voodoo]

True Faith by New Order is the most played song on my phone, mainly because I became addicted to it after I heard it on the Luka Magnotta video...And it was that video that made me a huge fan of the soundtrack dissonance trope, since the fruity song didn't match what was happening in the video...

I was already a New Order fan but i can confess that while I found the video to be a pathetic and sick cry for attention, the soundtrack was great.

[Femme Fatale]

 

True Faith by New Order is the most played song on my phone, mainly because I became addicted to it after I heard it on the Luka Magnotta video...And it was that video that made me a huge fan of the soundtrack dissonance trope, since the fruity song didn't match what was happening in the video...

I was already a New Order fan but i can confess that while I found the video to be a pathetic and sick cry for attention, the soundtrack was great.That's the spirit!

[drifter.]

Try Tinder, or one of those dating apps. You might find someone there.

I'm really on the fence about tinder, I tried before I did pretty decent for what I am and my taste in women, at the same time tinder is bane of most guys' egos. Another thing holding me back is that I feel like most kids my age who use tinder , also don't live with their parents.

 

Though if I ever got I to relationship with a girl who lived with her parents that'd make me pretty happy and feel like I'm a kid again in grade school bringing his gf over to play vide games ha.

[dudclub55]

I think I want a girlfriend.

I've been a few places and I've noticed a few girls checking me out. That was really all it took for me to want to get back into dating.

 

You need some of that Aqua charm.

[make total destroy]

Most of my profile views are from me going back and reading my "liked" posts.

 

Sometimes I can't help but think no one will ever find me as entertaining as I do.

 

 

EDIT: So I found what I think is my most "liked" post, and I don't even get how this got nearly 40 likes. Even John Smith "liked" it.

Edited June 3, 2016 by make total destroy

[AlienTwo]

I'm sure your mother does, buddy.

[sreyazsec]

I used to steal raw bacon squares from the fridge when I was young.

I'm a cock gobbler and I love to gobble cocks.

Edited June 8, 2016 by ceszayers

[Clem Fandango]

I steal bacon from the supermarket and if anyone gets in my way I break their face. I am a bad man.

[make total destroy]

I'm sure your mother does, buddy.

My mom can't stand me tbh

 

 

 

EDIT: this feels like it's probably grammatically incorrect or something but w/e grammar is a spook

Edited June 3, 2016 by make total destroy

[Femme Fatale]

Most of my profile views are from me going back and reading my "liked" posts.

 

Sometimes I can't help but think no one will ever find me as entertaining as I do.

 

 

EDIT: So I found what I think is my most "liked" post, and I don't even get how this got nearly 40 likes. Even John Smith "liked" it.

lol at that dude posting shirtless pics, as if he has a lot to show off...I confess that I like to do the same thing mtd does...

[IIVIIinion]

I saw game I wish never existed and complained to the company about (Destiny)

[sreyazsec]

I slept in my Mom's bed until I was 11 due to night terrors. It wasn't helped by the fact my Great Grandma gave me a porcelain clown on a swing and my Mom decided to hang it in my room.

It was the most terrifying thing I'd ever been given. I loved my Great Gran too much to ask for it to be put away.

 

I also wouldn't go upstairs on my own at nighttime.

 

I'm a cock gobbler and I love to gobble cock.

Edited June 8, 2016 by ceszayers

[Mister Kay]

My phonebook is 1500 contacts long but my 'contacts' are few and far between. I am having a difficult time inviting people to an event which is specifically for 'the people of my life'. What possible difference can I make if this is what I have? I used to dream of connecting with every single human on the planet all at the same time and right now I can't even make contact with more than 9 humans. fml