Hip Hop Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 So I think I was just caught masturbating. There's this girl I've been speaking to online, and she's really attractive. I had two Google Chrome windows up at once, one of the girl, another of this chubby woman being.. penetrated. So my mum's in the bathroom, then comes upstairs (our bathroom is downstairs) and I'm jacking off as she walks past my room, to get to hers. I pull up my trousers and hide my massive wad of meat in my boxers. I can't actually pull my trousers up all the way as the boner is stopping them, so I just sit down at my computer chair with my boxers showing somewhat. Fortunately, she doesn't come in my room, so I continue to masturbate, blowing my load on my computer desk. I find this a lot easier to simply dispose of, afterwards; instead of cumming into a tissue. Not to go into too much detail, but there was more than there usually is. Multiple thick, white splodges all over my desk. I don't know what made me shoot more, perhaps it was the subconscious excitement of being caught, masturbating under pressure, who knows. Literally moments after I've cummed, my mum attempts to open the door to get some washing from my room. I tell her I'm getting changed, but she's about half-way through the door by the time I've managed to stand there, blocking her from entering. My computer screen is visible from standing in the door way, as it's straight in front of you, as you come in. On-screen, there's this woman being done from behind, and I'm looking at her with a 'kill me now' look on my face. She looks kind-of past me, but whether she was actually looking at the screen is up for debate. I tell her I'm changing my trousers ready for work, and she leaves. It's been insanely awkward around the house. This encounter happened 10 minutes ago, and I've made brief conversation as I walked past her to empty my bin outside. I can't straight-up ask her if she saw the porn, accompanied by this thick wad of cum on the table; can I? I think this is one of those situations where it's never spoken of again. Have you ever been caught masturbating? The feeling is unexplainably awkward, thankfully I have a night-shift at work tonight so I won't have to be in the same presence as her. I guess this'll teach her from just barging in, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nlwt Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I think this is one of those situations where it's never spoken of again. Bang on. It's best not to mention it, that would just make things even more awkward. I've never been caught luckily, I only live with my Dad and I don't think he would make a big deal out of it if I got caught, but it would be awkward as f*ck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vertical limit Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Sux2bu Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExtremoMania Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Never and never will be, only did it when I'm alone in bed, to which the door is closed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudy Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 So I think I was just caught masturbating. There's this girl I've been speaking to online, and she's really attractive. I had two Google Chrome windows up at once, one of the girl, another of this chubby woman being.. penetrated. So my mum's in the bathroom, then comes upstairs (our bathroom is downstairs) and I'm jacking off as she walks past my room, to get to hers. I pull up my trousers and hide my massive wad of meat in my boxers. I can't actually pull my trousers up all the way as the boner is stopping them, so I just sit down at my computer chair with my boxers showing somewhat. Fortunately, she doesn't come in my room, so I continue to masturbate, blowing my load on my computer desk. I find this a lot easier to simply dispose of, afterwards; instead of cumming into a tissue. Not to go into too much detail, but there was more than there usually is. Multiple thick, white splodges all over my desk. I don't know what made me shoot more, perhaps it was the subconscious excitement of being caught, masturbating under pressure, who knows. Literally moments after I've cummed, my mum attempts to open the door to get some washing from my room. I tell her I'm getting changed, but she's about half-way through the door by the time I've managed to stand there, blocking her from entering. My computer screen is visible from standing in the door way, as it's straight in front of you, as you come in. On-screen, there's this woman being done from behind, and I'm looking at her with a 'kill me now' look on my face. She looks kind-of past me, but whether she was actually looking at the screen is up for debate. I tell her I'm changing my trousers ready for work, and she leaves. It's been insanely awkward around the house. This encounter happened 10 minutes ago, and I've made brief conversation as I walked past her to empty my bin outside. I can't straight-up ask her if she saw the porn, accompanied by this thick wad of cum on the table; can I? I think this is one of those situations where it's never spoken of again. Have you ever been caught masturbating? The feeling is unexplainably awkward, thankfully I have a night-shift at work tonight so I won't have to be in the same presence as her. I guess this'll teach her from just barging in, though. I'm pretty sure she didn't see it cause if she had seen it, she would have come in bashing the door, whilst shouting "COME ON SON, LETS GET LAID! MOMMYS FEELIN HORNY" and YOU have would have had your DICK subjected into incest sex. Hell, you wouldn't even bother showing up for your night-shift. The sight of a guy sticking his dick into a girl's vag and pure white cum perched onto something is enough to get a woman into mood. So yeah, have no f*ckin worries. Uncle Rudy out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 My folks caught my history on the browser before but never me whackin' it. That was when I was maybe 13 or 14 and forgot to erase history. Wasn't much of a big deal. When I lived with my folks my door had a window on it and I'd cover it with a small blanket. Except the mistake was I hung it on the outside and not the inside. So one day my dad without knocking, peeks in through the blanket. I was getting a blowjob from my first ex. He quickly left. Nothing was ever said about it. But I'm sure he was proud. Needless to say, I put the blanket on the inside after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finn 7 five 11 Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I think this is one of those situations where it's never spoken of again. Bang on. It's best not to mention it, that would just make things even more awkward. Boom! Right here. When I lived with my folks my door had a window on it and I'd cover it with a small blanket. Except the mistake was I hung it on the outside and not the inside. So one day my dad without knocking, peeks in through the blanket. I was getting a blowjob from my first ex. He quickly left. Nothing was ever said about it. But I'm sure he was proud. I literally squealed with laughter and shock when I got to the end of that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fireman Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 She saw it alright. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheIllaDopest Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 idk where you live but where i live they have locks on the doors to prevent sudden entrances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleBlueTroll Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Nothing wrong with a crafty tug. Next time you see her make eye contact, wink and say "Fancy lending a hand next time" Job done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA_stu Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 You risked this by continuing even when you knew your mum was nearby. You were listening to your dick and not to your brain. Your dick will screw you over, don't listen to your dick. And you spaff onto you desk? Wtf. Hope you use Detol or something afterwards. Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTAforthe21thcentury Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 So I think I was just caught masturbating. There's this girl I've been speaking to online, and she's really attractive. I had two Google Chrome windows up at once, one of the girl, another of this chubby woman being.. penetrated. So my mum's in the bathroom, then comes upstairs (our bathroom is downstairs) and I'm jacking off as she walks past my room, to get to hers. I pull up my trousers and hide my massive wad of meat in my boxers. I can't actually pull my trousers up all the way as the boner is stopping them, so I just sit down at my computer chair with my boxers showing somewhat. Fortunately, she doesn't come in my room, so I continue to masturbate, blowing my load on my computer desk. I find this a lot easier to simply dispose of, afterwards; instead of cumming into a tissue. Not to go into too much detail, but there was more than there usually is. Multiple thick, white splodges all over my desk. I don't know what made me shoot more, perhaps it was the subconscious excitement of being caught, masturbating under pressure, who knows. Literally moments after I've cummed, my mum attempts to open the door to get some washing from my room. I tell her I'm getting changed, but she's about half-way through the door by the time I've managed to stand there, blocking her from entering. My computer screen is visible from standing in the door way, as it's straight in front of you, as you come in. On-screen, there's this woman being done from behind, and I'm looking at her with a 'kill me now' look on my face. She looks kind-of past me, but whether she was actually looking at the screen is up for debate. I tell her I'm changing my trousers ready for work, and she leaves. It's been insanely awkward around the house. This encounter happened 10 minutes ago, and I've made brief conversation as I walked past her to empty my bin outside. I can't straight-up ask her if she saw the porn, accompanied by this thick wad of cum on the table; can I? I think this is one of those situations where it's never spoken of again. Have you ever been caught masturbating? The feeling is unexplainably awkward, thankfully I have a night-shift at work tonight so I won't have to be in the same presence as her. I guess this'll teach her from just barging in, though. She probably wants to have creepy incest sex with you, especially after seeing your dick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthYENIK Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Jesus, it happens. Every man in the world jerks off, no matter what they say, they do it, and a lot more women than you think too. Despite what the bullsh*t religious right says, it's nothing to be ashamed about. Just forget about it, and keep jerking your chicken. But for f*ck's sake, do it in privacy. In your room with the door closed, in the bathroom with the door closed, and if you do it in the shower, remember to blow your load outside of the shower so you don't clog the drain with spooge. It happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vercetti27 Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 just ask her if she saw you wanking. if she says no, say you meant planking on the computer desk. easy, subtle and not awkward at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clem Fandango Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 If you use headphones, then there's probably been multiple times when you were engrossed in a fap and someone walked in and quickly exited without you even knowing. Hope that makes you feel better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harley Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Fortunately, she doesn't come in my room, so I continue to masturbate, blowing my load on my computer desk. I find this a lot easier to simply dispose of, afterwards; instead of cumming into a tissue. That's f*cking disgusting. I was going to ask how on earth it's an easier procedure, but now I'm just going to slowly back out of this topic and try to block the image of your sticky grubby desk every time I see one of your posts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I<3GTAV Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I only fap when I'm sure no ones coming home. If someone is home, I go to the bathroom, turn on the light (which also turns on the fan), and fap to something in my mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolf of Badenoch Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 (edited) I always wait until after midnight if I'm going to masturbate, and even then, I always switch to Incognito, have tissues within reach, take my headphones off and turn the volume on my PC right down. Can never be too safe. For the record, I'm bi-curious. Edited May 24, 2013 by Valenta Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleBlueTroll Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Fortunately, she doesn't come in my room, so I continue to masturbate, blowing my load on my computer desk. I find this a lot easier to simply dispose of, afterwards; instead of cumming into a tissue. That's f*cking disgusting. I was going to ask how on earth it's an easier procedure, but now I'm just going to slowly back out of this topic and try to block the image of your sticky grubby desk every time I see one of your posts. God damn so will i now. It's like the dominoes effect, read that post and that's all you'll imagine too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TonyZimmzy Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I bet your mom's hot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Not knowing if you we're caught is the worst. I've come pretty close once. I was laying on the couch having a fap and I look up and my grandma is standing there. I quickly concealed my weapon under the blanket. She didn't mention it but I'm pretty sure she saw and just didn't want to talk about it.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lock n' Stock Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 My god, why the hell did you tell us this? Does anybody really need to know what you wanked off to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EvilFuture Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 LOL my mom knocked on my door mid jizz and I had to like f*cking push the sh*t out and I told her really nervously to "wait, I'm changing" so when I finally got it cleaned up and everything, I opened the door. She then told me I needed to take the trash out and she started to walk away and then suddenly slowly backed up and was like "wait... you're still in the same clothes." Goddamn, I forgot to change my clothes. I just told her I had diarrhea and I had an accident and she bought it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyrrhic Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Never and never will be, only did it when I'm alone in bed, to which the door is closed. This seems to be the key. Don't risk it and you won't get caught. I wouldn't even do it with another person in the same house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chewie Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I've never been caught. I've left tissues around by accident a few times after I had sex with my ex-girlfriend and my mom found it. She knew we had sex and didn't care. My sister found porn history on my dads laptop and my parents computer a few years ago. I've never been caught in the act. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mista J Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 If she hasn't mentioned it, leave it alone, the cobra doesn't to bite you, walk away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA_stu Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I've come pretty close once. I was laying on the couch having a fap and I look up and my grandma is standing there. I quickly concealed my weapon under the blanket. She didn't mention it but I'm pretty sure she saw and just didn't want to talk about it.. Goddamn. Why would you have a wank on the couch of all places? And when your grandma is in the house and could walk in at any minute. You shouldn't be doing it on the couch under any circumstances, let alone when somebody is in the house, and especially not if it's your f*cking grandma. Control yourselves you filthy little perverts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vin. Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 What the f*ck has this place turned into? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saggy Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I've got to make a note to myself that if I ever walk in on anyone masturbating I immediately flip out screaming, "OH my god what are you doing you disgusting freak? You should be ashamed of yourself!" QUOTE (K^2) ...not only is it legal for you to go around with a concealed penis, it requires absolutely no registration! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capricornus Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 LMFAO this is EPIC thread simulator bait! When I was living with my mommy, I got caught, left the damn door unlock. I was watching WWE, and the Divas were having a Lingerie match, and I started jacking off. Didn't get to finish myself off because I got busted instead of busting. That was about 10 years ago lol. Got my own place now, can jerk off at anytime. Speaking of which...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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