The Writers' Room

[GTA-King]

I don't want them to be homosexual. Not that I'm against that, it's just not the direction I want my story to go. However, I do want the psychopath to be kind of possessive over the sociopath at one point in the story. Like maybe eventually the sociopath starts his own family, and this bums the psychopath... because his best friend has no time for him anymore.

 

I do know I want the psychopath to be completely honest with himself, knowing he is true scum. I want the sociopath to be totally fake to people when speaking, but through his narration, we realise just how much of a terrible person he truly is on the inside.

Edited June 4, 2013 by GTA-King

[AceRay]

However, I do want the psychopath to be kind of possessive over the sociopath at one point in the story. Like maybe eventually the sociopath starts his own family, and this bums the psychopath... because his best friend has no time for him anymore.

Because he loves him. These two guys sound like they're deeply in love each other no matter how you look at it or whether you want it to or not. They spend their entire lives together, they become deeply jealous over each other and possessive, not being able to let the other one go. Come on, his best friend is spending time with his wife instead of him and he's jealous? There will always be a homoerotic subtext to this story, like in Commando, whether it was intended or just coincidental. Plus, I think your writing style would really fit cheap erotica, its downright perfect.

 

 

I do know I want the psychopath to be completely honest with himself, knowing he is true scum. I want the sociopath to be totally fake to people when speaking, but through his narration, we realise just how much of a terrible person he truly is on the inside.

Wouldn't it make more sense for the smarter, more careful one to be possessive and control the big guy, considering he's a car salesman and the other is just a brick layer? Wouldn't that make more sense? Imagine if it was Darth Vader, the tough guy, manipulating the chessmaster emperor. And what are these guys' names anyway, I keep forgetting which one is which.

[Tyler]

There is no lawful difference between psychopaths and sociopaths.

[AceRay]

 

There is no lawful difference between psychopaths and sociopaths.

Shhhhhhh, don't spoil it for him.

[TonyZimmzy]

You should watch Death Note if you're into a sociopath protagonist. Its amazingly good.

http://www.animecrazy.net/death-note-anime/

Best storyline an anime could ever have. And to top it off, they never dragged it out in to ridiculous amounts of episodes like most do.

[orbitalraindrops]

I've never been able to get into Anime, Manga or Hentai. I've tried really hard to get into it as tons of my friends love it especially sh*t like DBZ but I just can't. I like western cartoons though. Just something about anime is always really off putting for me.

[Typhus]

I have been hard on anime and manga in the past. But for the record, I think Dragonball is amazing and Hellsing is excellent as well.

Let me tell you the issue I have with it - despite being a popular form of both art and literature, it has remained foreign. Westerners consume it, enjoy it but don't seem to be able to give it their own spin.

 

As a result, when we get dubs of shows like those I mentioned - the dialogue seems massively stilted, as if written by someone with no understanding of how real people talk.

 

Plus, the androgynous nature of a lot of the characters is very off-putting.

[Tyler]

Let me tell you the issue I have with it - despite being a popular form of both art and literature, it has remained foreign. Westerners consume it, enjoy it but don't seem to be able to give it their own spin.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0213338/

 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113568/

 

 

These are both basically Westernized animes and both of them are critically acclaimed. There's a few other really good ones but Cowboy Bebop in particular is a good place to start for you. Like, it has none of the things you complained about and everything you think animes should be.

[GTA-King]

There is no lawful difference between psychopaths and sociopaths.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd done.

[Ziggy455]

There is no lawful difference between psychopaths and sociopaths.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd done.

This still sounds like a GTA V re-hash of Franklin and Michael's relationship. It is for most intents still fan-fiction.

[Mokrie Dela]

Can't say I agree with that statement ziggy (my iPhone autocorrected that to soggy).

 

Anyway; glad to see one shots alive again

[Ziggy455]

Can't say I agree with that statement ziggy (my iPhone autocorrected that to soggy).

 

Anyway; glad to see one shots alive again

I can see so many links to his story with GTA V.

[GTA-King]

 

Can't say I agree with that statement ziggy (my iPhone autocorrected that to soggy).

 

Anyway; glad to see one shots alive again

I can see so many links to his story with GTA V.

That's because you're looking for them, and being a judgmental c*nt.

Edited June 4, 2013 by GTA-King

[Ziggy455]

 

Can't say I agree with that statement ziggy (my iPhone autocorrected that to soggy).

 

Anyway; glad to see one shots alive again

I can see so many links to his story with GTA V.

That because you're looking for them, and being a judgmental c*nt.

No need to look for them when they're staring at me right in the face.

 

A sociopath? Michael.

 

A psychopath? Trevor.

 

Two friends that grew up together and obviously are going to end up going through a strain. Don't get all pissy because somebody can see through your pretentious sh*t. I'm not the one being judgmental. You're the one being pretentious by actually attempting to create a story that is so carelessly pulled out of Rockstar's creative hat, that you're getting defensive because you know exactly what kind of story you're trying to tell; one that so easily points to the highlights of two things.

 

Already created characters and chaos theory.

[orbitalraindrops]

I want to read GTA Kings story.

Also check out my one shot. I think it's pretty lulzy.

[Ziggy455]

I want to read GTA Kings story.

You would.

[Abel.]

 

I have been hard on anime and manga in the past. But for the record, I think Dragonball is amazing and Hellsing is excellent as well.

Let me tell you the issue I have with it - despite being a popular form of both art and literature, it has remained foreign. Westerners consume it, enjoy it but don't seem to be able to give it their own spin.

 

As a result, when we get dubs of shows like those I mentioned - the dialogue seems massively stilted, as if written by someone with no understanding of how real people talk.

 

Plus, the androgynous nature of a lot of the characters is very off-putting.

 

I love western comics, and Heavy Metal is one of my favourite films, but I just can't get into anime/manga. Maybe I just prefer something a little closer to home.

 

With that said, Heavy Metal has some unashamedly sexist parts--honestly, I think Melchior would punch his computer monitor whilst watching it--but it more than redeems itself with its ending, which overtly advocates strong female characters. In this way Heavy Metal simultaneously adheres to, and contradicts, stereotypes about western fantasy/animation.

[GTA-King]

Can't say I agree with that statement ziggy (my iPhone autocorrected that to soggy).

 

Anyway; glad to see one shots alive again

I can see so many links to his story with GTA V.

That because you're looking for them, and being a judgmental c*nt.

No need to look for them when they're staring at me right in the face.

 

A sociopath? Michael.

 

A psychopath? Trevor.

 

Two friends that grew up together and obviously are going to end up going through a strain. Don't get all pissy because somebody can see through your pretentious sh*t. I'm not the one being judgmental. You're the one being pretentious by actually attempting to create a story that is so carelessly pulled out of Rockstar's creative hat, that you're getting defensive because you know exactly what kind of story you're trying to tell; one that so easily points to the highlights of two things.

 

Already created characters and chaos theory.

You are an idiot.

[Ziggy455]

You think so?

 

Because I can clearly see you attempting to cover up most of the obvious flaws of your story in the ensuing weeks. I'm sure you'll blast the socks off of WD with your sh*t.

 

I'm sure it'll be an original masterpiece, not one iota of it will reek of GTA V in any way.

 

The Fox & The Hound is a simple way of explaining Franklin and Trevor's relationship. Change the names and job roles and look what you've done. You've amazed half of WD with your amazing ingenuity.

 

 

Edited June 4, 2013 by Ziggy455

[GTA-King]

You are just adorable.

[Ziggy455]

You are just adorable.

I try to be.

 

I'll try not to laugh as hard when I see the bigger picture. You know the one where your story doesn't come off like you think it will, and it just leaves a stench of cliche. Keep writing, you're halfway to nowhere, son. Can't wait to read your super cool, awesome, non-fanfic related story.

 

You're going to the top. You've made it. In fact, you're there. You're so up there that I can't even see you way down here. Hope it feels good up there, y'know, with the talented writers. Hope you're getting some rays and living life well.

 

I'm sure your story's gonna be great.

[GTA-King]

I'm honestly concerned about your mental health. You are wasting too much energy on me. Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. I'd just hate for you to stroke out.

 

But anyway, let's not turn this into another "thing." Just know that my story is based on The fox and the hound and not GTA V, then you will be fine.

 

Also, remember to breath.

Edited June 4, 2013 by GTA-King

[Ziggy455]

 

I honestly concerned about your mental health. You are wasting too much energy on me. Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. I'd just hate for you to stroke out.

I don't waste energy. You're so beneath me that just commenting on you, day after day, is kind of simple. You're not a smart man. You're as simple as they come. I comment, you comment with a retort. You go on in your big bubble about how you're right and how I'm this or that. When in actuality, you don't like to be reminded you're a cheating, unambitious fool. And as long as you're around here; don't expect anything other than this from me if I'm here.

 

You act like a fool, and you get treated like one. You act like a troll, expect to be treated worse. You try to play off the moral high-ground; don't expect anyone to fall for it. Beneath it you're pretty much a cheater and an absolute mong.

 

It just makes me think how much WD has slipped, if they welcome people like you here with open arms; ready to read the first GTA V content you're willing to sh*t out onto a word processor. It's not you I'm putting the energy into, you see? You're just a bug on the windshield. It's WD I worry about; because if people like you are what's in its future as a community, than it stands no chance of ever being anything greater than it was before you showed up and polluted it.

 

Putting the past aside for a moment; it's not even the cheating that keeps me on you. It's just you. The way you are, the things you do, the way you try to flip from one viewpoint to the next, always trying to fit in to escape punishment. No wonder WD's going down the sh*tter.

 

[Lethal Nizzle]

Let me tell you the issue I have with it - despite being a popular form of both art and literature, it has remained foreign. Westerners consume it, enjoy it but don't seem to be able to give it their own spin.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0213338/

 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113568/

 

 

These are both basically Westernized animes and both of them are critically acclaimed. There's a few other really good ones but Cowboy Bebop in particular is a good place to start for you. Like, it has none of the things you complained about and everything you think animes should be.

I agree, Cowboy Bebop is a fantastic series. I've never been a huge fan of anime but Bebop blew me away; the stories, the characters and the animation are all very striking, plus it's very accessible. The episodes are more often than not (save the first and final few) standalone vignettes. I personally recommend "Session 20: Pierrot Le Fou", the fairground section still sends chills down my spine.

[GTA-King]

it's not even the cheating that keeps me on you. It's just you.

[Ziggy455]

it's not even the cheating that keeps me on you. It's just you.

You are a cancer.

 

 

A 22 year old, weed-toking, goalless, drifting 4Chan cancer. And you're killing WD. I won't be around to see you and your cronies killing it any longer.

[orbitalraindrops]

does GTA King have any cronies here?

[Ziggy455]

does GTA King have any cronies here?

You're definitely one on that list.

[Typhus]

Question for you guys - I have a secondary antagonist who is a dimwit, but he's a vicious dimwit who had attained a certain level of influence and power in his community.

Do you think it's possible for a villain to be truly detestable even when being shown as uneducated, cowardly and absurd? He's basically a drunken, failed human being before an event allows him to become important.

[orbitalraindrops]

I would say that based on your description he would be truly detestable. Being drunken, cowardly and absurd in itself makes a character detestable. After all they are all detestable traits. It might not evoke fear in the reader like if they were confronted with a mysterious malevolent scheming manipulator type character but you could certainly detest such a person. I suppose how much the reader detests him lies on whether he has any redeeming features as well. I think the fact that he holds power (However wide spread that power might be) makes him more dislikeable due to the connotation that if you have power over something/ someone you could control them. I don't know.... but from what you've said about him I would detest him. That's just my opinion though.