Typhus Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 My high school sweetheart, Katie Vick.I thought she'd be dynamite in the sack, but she just lay there, motionless. Her expression didn't change much either. Honestly, halfway through I started wondering if she was even human at all or if she was just wearing human skin and was filled with sawdust and embalming fluids or something. http://themadchuck.wordpress.com/2011/07/0...-vick-incident/ I didnt know you are actually triple H I was waiting for someone to get the joke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acmilano Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 ^^^ One google search was enough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr quick Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 my own mouth: Really? I can't reach that far. you just kinda lay on your back and put your legs on the wall behind you (practice makes perfect ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Dildo Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 I was waiting for someone to get the joke oh we got it. we're just trying not to vomit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
orbitalraindrops Posted February 17, 2013 Author Share Posted February 17, 2013 (edited) I love sticking my dick in things. Especially inanimate objects. It's the ultimate form of power, to have sex with an inanimate object I think. Like somebody got the materials and put it through a factory to make this thing and then it goes to a supplier who sells it to a shop, and I buy it and currency is exchanged etc etc. It's a long detailed process for the creation of this object And then the end result is my sexual pleasure. I mean how awesome is that. I know I come across as a funny, confident, good looking ladies man with lots of money and a very high I.Q. But the reality is I'm quite sexually frustrated. I took some cooked ham from the staff fridge at the work canteen yesterday. I might put on some make up and some of my sisters tights, go on chat roulette, make love to that sh*t and freak the f*ck out of some guys who go on there to pick up chicks. Edited February 17, 2013 by orbitalraindrops Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayne Daniels Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 ^^Where/how the f*ck does the cooked ham come into that plan?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
orbitalraindrops Posted February 17, 2013 Author Share Posted February 17, 2013 ^^Where/how the f*ck does the cooked ham come into that plan?? Just wrap it around my 5.5 incher ennit and rub up and down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Exxon Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OverTheBelow Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 ^^Where/how the f*ck does the cooked ham come into that plan?? Just wrap it around my 5.5 incher ennit and rub up and down. That sounds alot like bestiality-necrophilia to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chunk Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Yer maw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 (edited) Nobody said "your mother" yet? yo mamas pussy Anyway orbitalraindrops... your posts have a very unique quality and they have depth at the same time, that's weird. The staff should think about adding a category in the annual awards for "Most disgusting Topic of the Year" or "Most disgusting Topic Creator" or something like this. You would win it without a doubt. Edited February 17, 2013 by Carl CJ Johnsons Brother Brian GTAForums Crew Chat Thread - The Sharks Chat Thread - Leone Family Mafia Chat Thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stephan90 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vercetti27 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Beer. If your penis fits in the peak of a beer bottle you should be worried. Also, my view of men has slightly lowered with this thread. Typhus, are you sure she wasn't a blow up doll? oh if only you had a penis, you'd understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EscoLehGo Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 I love sticking my dick in things. Especially inanimate objects. It's the ultimate form of power, to have sex with an inanimate object I think. No it's not dude, it's actually the exact opposite in my opinion, it shows how powerless you are over your meat organ that you let it control you and do deplorable things to satisfy its carnal desires. Having a penis is such a burden, Louis CK has a great bit about it, it's not that men think about sex all the time it's just when we start thinking about it we can't stop until a nut has been deposited, it's like being a wolf-man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA_stu Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 This thread is just horrific to read. I feel like going on bestgore to calm down and rest my nerves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 It's the ultimate form of power, to have sex with an inanimate object I think. Well I'll debate you on the finer points of th I know I come across as a funny, confident, good looking ladies man with lots of money and a very high I.Q. But the reality is I'm quite sexually frustrated. Oh. Really? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 I'm developing a man crush on orbitalraindrops. He can't put his dick in me, though. That's where I draw the line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LewisMiller Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 A hole in a pillow when I was like 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA-King Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 @GTA-King I prefer bratz dolls myself but hey each to their own I always thought that would be weird because Bratz dolls are kids. But Barbie is a grown woman, so in my mind, it would be considered legal to put my dick in her (like, up her tight skirt). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA_stu Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 @GTA-King I prefer bratz dolls myself but hey each to their own I always thought that would be weird because Bratz dolls are kids. But Barbie is a grown woman, so in my mind, it would be considered legal to put my dick in her (like, up her tight skirt). I wouldn't go anywhere a Bratz, regardless of their age. They look and dress like cum dumpsters, they're just sluts. Barbie is a classy girl, she's much more respectable and the sort of girl you'd take home to your mum. I used to enact little relationships between my Action Man and my sister's Barbie dolls, like they were husband and wife. I'd build them a home, and Action Man would drive around in his jeep then come home to Barbie, and she'd have dinner ready and probably make a remark about action man's awesome jeep. Then they'd finish dinner and that douche Ken would come knocking on the door, and Action Man would beat his ass up, which would really impress Barbie and get her all wet. Then Action Man would carry Barbie upstairs, well actually it was just to the bedroom which was on the only floor in their bungalow. I didn't have enough boxes to make an upstairs. And then he'd take his army clothes/skiing outfit/scuba gear/mountaineering equipment off, and have his way with Barbie. But because they were both born without genitals they just dry humped and kissed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OverTheBelow Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 @GTA-King I prefer bratz dolls myself but hey each to their own I always thought that would be weird because Bratz dolls are kids. But Barbie is a grown woman, so in my mind, it would be considered legal to put my dick in her (like, up her tight skirt). I wouldn't go anywhere a Bratz, regardless of their age. They look and dress like cum dumpsters, they're just sluts. Barbie is a classy girl, she's much more respectable and the sort of girl you'd take home to your mum. I used to enact little relationships between my Action Man and my sister's Barbie dolls, like they were husband and wife. I'd build them a home, and Action Man would drive around in his jeep then come home to Barbie, and she'd have dinner ready and probably make a remark about action man's awesome jeep. Then they'd finish dinner and that douche Ken would come knocking on the door, and Action Man would beat his ass up, which would really impress Barbie and get her all wet. Then Action Man would carry Barbie upstairs, well actually it was just to the bedroom which was on the only floor in their bungalow. I didn't have enough boxes to make an upstairs. And then he'd take his army clothes/skiing outfit/scuba gear/mountaineering equipment off, and have his way with Barbie. But because they were both born without genitals they just dry humped and kissed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Of Monra Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 What the f*ck? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joseph Cooke Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 A hole in a pillow when I was like 13 PILLOW BUSTER! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FAH-Q Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 a chocolate shake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corndawg93 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 You people have some serious problems Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.dre. Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 So no one has ever tried to push it in a toilet paper roll to measure the thickness? No one? ok. D3ADSH0T 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr quick Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 So no one has ever tried to push it in a toilet paper roll to measure the thickness? No one? ok. yeah but it didn't quite fit, so we wouldn't say we've put it 'in' it just thought of another one: condom. that sh*t just didn't sit right Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTA-King Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 @GTA-King I prefer bratz dolls myself but hey each to their own I always thought that would be weird because Bratz dolls are kids. But Barbie is a grown woman, so in my mind, it would be considered legal to put my dick in her (like, up her tight skirt). I wouldn't go anywhere a Bratz, regardless of their age. They look and dress like cum dumpsters, they're just sluts. Barbie is a classy girl, she's much more respectable and the sort of girl you'd take home to your mum. I used to enact little relationships between my Action Man and my sister's Barbie dolls, like they were husband and wife. I'd build them a home, and Action Man would drive around in his jeep then come home to Barbie, and she'd have dinner ready and probably make a remark about action man's awesome jeep. Then they'd finish dinner and that douche Ken would come knocking on the door, and Action Man would beat his ass up, which would really impress Barbie and get her all wet. Then Action Man would carry Barbie upstairs, well actually it was just to the bedroom which was on the only floor in their bungalow. I didn't have enough boxes to make an upstairs. And then he'd take his army clothes/skiing outfit/scuba gear/mountaineering equipment off, and have his way with Barbie. But because they were both born without genitals they just dry humped and kissed. After reading what GTA_stu said, and watching that video... I think it's safe to say that I have an erection. *looks down pants* Yep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finn 7 five 11 Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 The corpse of a twelve year old girl. That's not really funny... I think it is. She was dead and had the tighest c*nt I've ever been in, haha. That was good, made me laugh! Kifflom, stop being such a Bitch, because that's all I see, a Bitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZDANZ96 Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) One of these... It's still in there to this day.. I have to use the vacuum if I want to pee.. How large are those things? I mean if you are able to fit your penis in those things then I feel sorry for you bro. If your penis fits in the peak of a beer bottle you should be worried. Well it depends on the size of both things. But you gotta realise that a man's dick is not always hard, and it might fit as well in things that you would never imagine. Edited February 18, 2013 by ZDANZ96 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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