dealing witha drunk

[dryfish]

my question is how do you guys deal with drunks? how do you feel when around them? did you grow up with them? im dealing with 1 right now and i have no clue what to do about it /: i dealt with them before but this is just plain crazy

[universetwisters]

Just try to keep them calm and try to get them to sleep. That works for me every time, and I'm hoping it works for you

 

But never, ever, ever, bring up their drinking when they're drunk, never.

[dryfish]

Just try to keep them calm and try to get them to sleep. That works for me every time, and I'm hoping it works for you

 

But never, ever, ever, bring up their drinking when they're drunk, never.

thanks! i do try but sometimes it is to uncontrollable. as it is now sadly

[universetwisters]

Just try to keep them calm and try to get them to sleep. That works for me every time, and I'm hoping it works for you 

 

But never, ever, ever, bring up their drinking when they're drunk, never.

thanks! i do try but sometimes it is to uncontrollable. as it is now sadly

Ok amigo, just keep calm and tell me what's going down

[dryfish]

thanks! i do try but sometimes it is to uncontrollable. as it is now sadly

Ok amigo, just keep calm and tell me what's going down

well being obnoxious, more drinking, restlessness and is making a joke of everything even really bad stuff that happens

[universetwisters]

thanks! i do try but sometimes it is to uncontrollable. as it is now sadly

Ok amigo, just keep calm and tell me what's going down

well being obnoxious, more drinking, restlessness and is making a joke of everything even really bad stuff that happens

I've got two options for you, they work for me whenever my folks are piss drunk:

 

1. take a walk around the neighborhood.

2. try to get them to go to sleep

[dryfish]

thanks! i do try but sometimes it is to uncontrollable. as it is now sadly

Ok amigo, just keep calm and tell me what's going down

well being obnoxious, more drinking, restlessness and is making a joke of everything even really bad stuff that happens

I've got two options for you, they work for me whenever my folks are piss drunk:

 

1. take a walk around the neighborhood.

2. try to get them to go to sleep

yea i thinka walk would be nice. thanks for that idea ^.^

[Nah Tso Gud]

Constantly agree with them and gradually re direct the conversation. If you've known them for awhile bring up old times.

[GunWrath]

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

[Roflkon]

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

Is it really as culty and religious as everyone thinks?

[Clem Fandango]

There's one solution that's being marginalised here: join the party!

[GunWrath]

 

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

Is it really as culty and religious as everyone thinks?

Nah, they say a higher power to YOUR understanding. You can be an atheist, I am. I just replace "God" part in the serenity prayer with whatever I feel helps me. "Harley-Davidson grant me the serenity".. you get the point. It may not seem constructive to some, but it helps me.

 

At first, I was like wtf is this sh*t.. but I'm not spiritual or religious to any extent.. but what people share and say, I listen to some and find the similarities and it does help. It's suprising how much "I had a sh*tty day today at work.." actually helps because you can relate to it.. then they share how they got through the day. It works for some and for some it doesn't. It really depends on how you make it out to be and if you follow the steps. Getting a sponsor can help tremendously as well. One thing is for sure about the place though, no matter if you come in drunk or pissed off.. you're still greeted as a friend man and it makes a big difference to those who suffer from alcoholism.

[EscoLehGo]

 

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

Is it really as culty and religious as everyone thinks?

Yes, yes it is. I was court ordered to go for a while, it was a very depressing experience and it seemed like the people there had just traded one dependency for another

 

@OP, kick them out if they're at your place, show them tough love. Who are they to you? A friend? A relative? Put them on the street, that's what we do round these parts if one of our friends can't handle his alcohol properly, we put him in time out.

Edited January 12, 2013 by EscoLehGo

[GTA_stu]

If they're being aggressive there's pretty much nothing you can say or do to change their mindset, so it's best to walk away and leave them. If they're being chatty and won't shut up, just indulge them, you don't even need to pay attention. Just say "Yh I know mate" every 30 seconds or so. If they're crying their eyes out, either take advantage of them or pass them onto someone else. Can't really go wrong with any of that. If you're the drunk yourself, you probably won't be aware, just make sure you aren't being groped or led down a dark alley and everything will be alright come morning.

[dryfish]

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

Is it really as culty and religious as everyone thinks?

Yes, yes it is. I was court ordered to go for a while, it was a very depressing experience and it seemed like the people there had just traded one dependency for another

 

@OP, kick them out if they're at your place, show them tough love. Who are they to you? A friend? A relative? Put them on the street, that's what we do round these parts if one of our friends can't handle his alcohol properly, we put him in time out.

it is a relative indeed....

[dryfish]

its not really beer its more the hard liquor like jack daniels and that stuff

[EscoLehGo]

What is it your drunken father or something? Film him in his inebriated state and then post the video to youtube so he can see how he is when he's wasted, worked for David Hasselfhoff.

 

 

 

 

[dryfish]

What is it your drunken father or something? Film him in his inebriated state and then post the video to youtube so he can see how he is when he's wasted, worked for David Hasselfhoff.

 

 

thats actually another really good idea! the other problem is that he doesnt get embarrassed or even bothered by anything...

[Voodoo]

 

its not really beer its more the hard liquor like jack daniels and that stuff

 

At least they're not a bunch of slack-jawed fa**ots.

[Saggy]

Coming from an alcoholic, the best way to deal with a drunk is to actually avoid helping them unless of course they're at the point of no return, walking across a street or falling down, (They may become violent) But if it's someone close to you, it's best to try and get them to walk, get a coffee, sit down, etc. Our brains don't think, "Hey, that's my best bud", we think, "Why the f*ck is this guy trying to talk to me or grab me?!".. Depending on the situation, it's best to try and get them to bed or to slowly get them to stop drinking and when they're sober.. try and talk to them about their drinking. Possibly mention AA..

 

Funny you post this, because tonight I got my 9 month chip in AA. Been a long 9 months but life is much better that I'm not drinking.. but it only takes one drink to change that for me. Just try and be supportive and let them know you care.

Is it really as culty and religious as everyone thinks?

Nah, they say a higher power to YOUR understanding. You can be an atheist, I am. I just replace "God" part in the serenity prayer with whatever I feel helps me. "Harley-Davidson grant me the serenity".. you get the point. It may not seem constructive to some, but it helps me.

 

At first, I was like wtf is this sh*t.. but I'm not spiritual or religious to any extent.. but what people share and say, I listen to some and find the similarities and it does help. It's suprising how much "I had a sh*tty day today at work.." actually helps because you can relate to it.. then they share how they got through the day. It works for some and for some it doesn't. It really depends on how you make it out to be and if you follow the steps. Getting a sponsor can help tremendously as well. One thing is for sure about the place though, no matter if you come in drunk or pissed off.. you're still greeted as a friend man and it makes a big difference to those who suffer from alcoholism.

I never got that whole "Your higher power can be anything you want," idea. My parents went to AA for over ten years, I don't know how many countless meetings I got dragged to as a kid and how many Big Book studies and stuff I've listened in on, and I've talked about them and their sponsors/sponsees about it before and I just never got it. One of them tried telling me, "Your higher power can be the tree outside," but when I asked, "So you're supposed to turn your life over to that tree and ask the tree for the strength and serenity?" they got all pissy at me.

 

Personally I think they just say that to try to avoid making it a religious thing. Most of them that I knew accepted "God" as their higher power and from what limited amount I've read of the Big Book it didn't seem like Bill W. was talking about trees and Harley Davidsons.

 

For everyone else's enlightenment, here are the 12 steps...

 

 

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

 

 

Now, how one can work in "tree" or "Harley Davidson" in place of "God" is beyond me. Maybe you have to be an alcoholic to get it.

 

 

I mean, frankly I believe it's just open enough so that it does not exclude any one person's idea of god...

[Finn 7 five 11]

With drunks I just agree with everything while doing my own thing, my Mum was an alcoholic for most of my childhood along with 3 of her brothers (Only 1 of which is a Chronic alcoholic now.) and would yell and scream just about every night at my Dad, but got extremely bad for about 3 years until My Dad and my younger sister just got up and left.

 

Now she goes off the rails every once in a while, I just agree with everything if I happen to visit while she's drunk, but since I know her I usually tell her to go get f*cked, f*ck off, piss off ect because she's drunk, anyone else though, like I said, just agree with everything.

 

I always think what A shame it is for my uncles, the two that have been total sobers are both multi millionaires, one of which worked as the marketing manager for all Westfield stores in the Southern Hemisphere and the other is basically a Jack of all trades who owns some businesses, the others just ruined their lives getting divorced, having their kids hate them, or severely damaging their marriages at least.

[S5L3T0]

My mom was an alcoholic. She was nuts. So many times my dad would take her to rehab and shed be back the next day drinking. It finaly took an incident where she was so drunk I had to call the cops. I was 10 my sister 9. She tried to come at me with a knife but she could barely walk, and my dad took us when he got home and I didn't see her for a year. She refused any opportunity to get better and kept drinking till she died my freshman year. Idk your situation or age, but if whoever this alcoholic is keeps this up without wanting to better themselves, sometimes the best thing for both of you would be you separating yourself from it. Its really, really hard when its a parent. People take it as a joke but when you grow up seeing and experience that sh*t, it resonates. There's a reason I refuse, flat out, to deal with a drunk. Can't stand them. Its amazing how self-centered they are also as I'm sure u know

[FAH-Q]

Thanks for this depressing read... as if the rain isn't depressing enough.

[Clem Fandango]

Personally I think they just say that to try to avoid making it a religious thing. Most of them that I knew accepted "God" as their higher power and from what limited amount I've read of the Big Book it didn't seem like Bill W. was talking about trees and Harley Davidsons

Wait so if I wake up one day and- touch wood- I realise the fun has stopped, I can surrender myself to Goku and beg Goku for the strength and serenity to overcome my weakness? And people will congratulate me for it? Nice.

[ryuclan]

I've had many alcoholics in my family but none have Ben the obnoxious, mean and abusive drunks. Just laugh, make fun of people and f*ck around drunks. I think I've gotten a bit of that alcoholism but I've never gotten mean. Actually I rarely get drubj to the point where I am flat drunk. I Dont drink my problems away and I Dont substitute it for fixing my issues.

 

 

What you need to do is have a talk with this person while they're sober. Tell them you're concerned and Dont really like what they are doing to themselves. If they Dont care then neither should you and just start leaving the house or going to your room when they get drunk. Unless the problems in the real world are resolved for this person they will continue to drink, Dont confront someone when they're drunk.

[DeeperRed]

Can anyone explain to me how one becomes an alcoholic ? Understand other drugs such as cocaine, crack, heroin etc even weed (I wouldn't say I was addicted but I smoke most days) but I could never understand an alcohol addiction.

 

I like drinking, but only really when I am with friends. I just don't see how being drunk on your own is fun or interesting. Unlike the other drugs mentioned they all have a side of sobriety to them, even when you have taken a lot. With drink you lose your coordination, don't think straight and just generally get f*cked. How does one get drawn into this ?

[ryuclan]

Can anyone explain to me how one becomes an alcoholic ? Understand other drugs such as cocaine, crack, heroin etc even weed (I wouldn't say I was addicted but I smoke most days) but I could never understand an alcohol addiction.

 

I like drinking, but only really when I am with friends. I just don't see how being drunk on your own is fun or interesting. Unlike the other drugs mentioned they all have a side of sobriety to them, even when you have taken a lot. With drink you lose your coordination, don't think straight and just generally get f*cked. How does one get drawn into this ?

It helps some people sleep. Some people forget about all the problems they have when they're drunk so they do it often. Some people like the taste and some people just like to be drunk.

[EscoLehGo]

 

Can anyone explain to me how one becomes an alcoholic ?  Understand other drugs such as cocaine, crack, heroin etc even weed (I wouldn't say I was addicted but I smoke most days) but I could never understand an alcohol addiction.

 

I like drinking, but only really when I am with friends. I just don't see how being drunk on your own is fun or interesting. Unlike the other drugs mentioned they all have a side of sobriety to them, even when you have taken a lot. With drink you lose your coordination, don't think straight and just generally get f*cked. How does one get drawn into this ?

I like reefer best when in combination with alcohol, otherwise I tend to get paranoid and generally don't enjoy my experience with it. Alcohol takes the edge off for me, I'm far more easy going and less prone to anger when I'm buzzed or intoxicated. I've had more fun in some instances drinking alone than when drinking with friends, as sad or confusing as that may sound. Boredom can draw a lot of people into the habit of drinking too much, if you live in an area where there isn't much to do or much of a nightlife at all and reefer isn't readily available to buy, you might turn to the bottle to brighten things up.

[El Dildo]

just don't talk to them.

 

let someone else deal with a drunk person unless you want to waste your entire evening baby sitting a grown man.

[GunWrath]

Can anyone explain to me how one becomes an alcoholic ? Understand other drugs such as cocaine, crack, heroin etc even weed (I wouldn't say I was addicted but I smoke most days) but I could never understand an alcohol addiction.

 

I like drinking, but only really when I am with friends. I just don't see how being drunk on your own is fun or interesting. Unlike the other drugs mentioned they all have a side of sobriety to them, even when you have taken a lot. With drink you lose your coordination, don't think straight and just generally get f*cked. How does one get drawn into this ?

Alcohol is a drug much like all the others.

 

Alcohol can suppress emotions, intense them or just make you feel numb. Some people choose to drown their sorrows with a bottle or two of their flavor. It keeps them from thinking of what makes them feel down but the majority of the time, alcohol only makes it worse in some situations. My drinking started much like everyone else.. social drinking and then partying. Then you develop alcoholism over time.. to where you NEED alcohol to feel normal. I went through DT's when I had to quit. Shakes, cramps, cold sweats.. all that fun sh*t, though it wasn't fun.

 

Some people just have addictive personalities.. so they develop addictions with little to no effort. Just have to be responsible at whatever you're doing.