So My Girlfriend Wants To Take a Break...

[Gtaghost22]

I don't want to sound like an arsehole but..

 

It's over mate, there is no such thing as a break, that's f*cking bollocks.

She is just making an excuse to sound nice but she will dumb you later anyway, be a man and do it yourself, she obviously doesn't like you so why bother and waste your time?

[Vercetti27]

she has serious emotional problems indicating from what you've said. tell her what typhus said about her, maybe she needs to realise that she needs to be stronger, and quit telling her she's beautiful. It shouldn't be said so often, thats its value

[OchyGTA]

Man I was in a similar situation once. I got into an argument with my girlfriend over how some guy at we job was hitting on her. She suggested we take a break to which I reluctantly complied. I got drunk that night and ended up sleeping with some chick I met at the bar. Unfortunately I didn't think about the trail and Rachael and I broke up. I told her that we were on a break but she wasn't having any of it.

[Dingdongs]

Typhus is completely right. You shouldn't treat any girl like that (save for a wife/fiance/really long term girlfriend - yours was a month and a week) - the key with dating girls is to act like they are nothing special. Even if they are really special to you, if you treat them that way they will get bored and leave you. Don't call them and text them every f*cking waking moment, don't show up to their window with flowers and chocolates every night, etc. Your best bet is to leave her alone for at least 3 days. At that point, shoot her a really short and simple text saying nothing more than "let's talk in person, meet me (location) at (time)" - don't respond to whatever she says next, unless it's rescheduling when you meet.

[Vercetti27]

Typhus is completely right. You shouldn't treat any girl like that (save for a wife/fiance/really long term girlfriend - yours was a month and a week) - the key with dating girls is to act like they are nothing special. Even if they are really special to you, if you treat them that way they will get bored and leave you. Don't call them and text them every f*cking waking moment, don't show up to their window with flowers and chocolates every night, etc. Your best bet is to leave her alone for at least 3 days. At that point, shoot her a really short and simple text saying nothing more than "let's talk in person, meet me (location) at (time)" - don't respond to whatever she says next, unless it's rescheduling when you meet.

sorry but every girl is different , I can't imagine that would work when a girl sees you as a friend as well.

[EscoLehGo]

Typhus is completely right. You shouldn't treat any girl like that (save for a wife/fiance/really long term girlfriend - yours was a month and a week) - the key with dating girls is to act like they are nothing special. Even if they are really special to you, if you treat them that way they will get bored and leave you. Don't call them and text them every f*cking waking moment, don't show up to their window with flowers and chocolates every night, etc. Your best bet is to leave her alone for at least 3 days. At that point, shoot her a really short and simple text saying nothing more than "let's talk in person, meet me (location) at (time)" - don't respond to whatever she says next, unless it's rescheduling when you meet.

sorry but every girl is different , I can't imagine that would work when a girl sees you as a friend as well.

She probably doesn't want to keep him as a real friend though, just some back up guy she can go cry to when sh*t hits the fan.

[JOSEPH X]

If you love someone, let them go - and if they come back, they're yours forever.

 

So the saying goes. You should trust that if she doesn't come back, then she never really loved you anyway.

 

 

[blitz]

She told you through Facebook? Come on...

[Dingdongs]

 

Typhus is completely right. You shouldn't treat any girl like that (save for a wife/fiance/really long term girlfriend - yours was a month and a week) - the key with dating girls is to act like they are nothing special. Even if they are really special to you, if you treat them that way they will get bored and leave you. Don't call them and text them every f*cking waking moment, don't show up to their window with flowers and chocolates every night, etc. Your best bet is to leave her alone for at least 3 days. At that point, shoot her a really short and simple text saying nothing more than "let's talk in person, meet me (location) at (time)" - don't respond to whatever she says next, unless it's rescheduling when you meet.

sorry but every girl is different , I can't imagine that would work when a girl sees you as a friend as well.

She probably doesn't want to keep him as a real friend though, just some back up guy she can go cry to when sh*t hits the fan.

They're really not. You can't worship the ground some girl you've been going out with for a month walks on. If you do that, you'll be put into either A) the friendzone or B) what Esco said, become a backup guy for her to go and cry to and hear nice things about herself for a few days before she moves on to someone else.

[universetwisters]

I hate to break it to you, but my ex girlfriend pulled the same sh*t on me-shes a whore.

[Dj_Gh0zt]

You two sound like a whack ass Ross and Rachel.

 

And you "love" her after 1 month? What is this, a romantic comedy?

 

Just f*ck another girl when you are on a break, and if she gets mad, say we were on a break.

 

Shes probably not the one anyway.

[Finn 7 five 11]

This is definitely not what a relationship is to me.

 

I mean, you like a girl and as soon as this happens you're STRATEGISING.

 

'What do I ask her' 'How often should I tell her she's beautiful' 'Do I play hard to get'

 

What's the f*cking point?

 

I mean if you wanna tell her she's beautiful, say it when you feel like it, don't make it into something where you go 'OH sh*t ITS 3 PM I BETTER TELL HER SHE'S BEAUTIFUL OR SHE'S GONNA DUMP ME'.

 

I mean if a relationship means constantly strategising and plotting to keep the other person loving you, I'd rather stay single forever. Seems more of a chore than what I'd consider a relationship.

 

But hey, that's just what I think.

Yep yep, this is some good advice for later as well, any relationship you are doing this in seems pretty false to me, do you strategize and plan what you are going to say to your friends and how to approach them? Nope, you just f*cking hang out with them! That is how it should be with a Girl-friend

 

You only sort of half plan what you are going to say before you are comfortable/going-out so that you don't end up with boring moments or retarded conversations when you are probing each other (anally), but once you are dating you should be comfortable enough that you don't need to plan what to say, or what your next move is, that's f*cking dumb.

 

Dump the hoe, she's insecure and not your problem, you tried and it didn't work, maybe it could have if you were someone that Typhus described in the first post, but clearly you're not, relationships go sour and like someone else said, mark it down on the chalkboard as some experience and find someone else rather than wasting your time.

[arsenal_fan]

Like finn4life sad, she is clearly insecure and even if you got back together, she will only be trouble further down the road anyway. My ex did pretty much exactly the same your girl did, saying she 'really liked me' but just wanted to be friends. Then a couple of months later, I hooked up with one of her good friends at a party and she went mental at me, even though she was the one who apparently wanted to be single.

 

 

There is no point dealing with girls like this, just leave her alone, being with girls like this will only cause you depression and go into insanity. Mark this down as a learning experience and move on.

[fgcarva1]

As stated, "Don't put the pussy on a pedestal." WOmen are tough elements of life, personally I just enter relationships when I really feel my life is calm and I have enough time and patience for more hassle. Yes, the touch of a woman's lips, skin and etc. are special but you have to get your sh*t together before you go on talking to her. As others said, act cold, relax, be cool, don't go after her too much because if you do she may keep moving away, if you don't you still have chances. Let her think things through and make up her mind. I'd recommend seeing her personally if you haven't yet for a brief talk, but don't pressure her into anything, let her talk, let her control the conversation and make it brief so she won't feel too emotional.

 

I would find this a stupid and unnecessary tip at times but when I listen to the radio late at night the show Loveline is on and they're professionals that deal with this type of stuff so perhaps calling them would be a good idea. Of course I may look like an ass recommending a radio show, but trust me, they're good.

 

EDIT: Oh, and arsenal_fan speaks the truth if you do possibly get back together.

[trip]

Ignore anything that any dudes said in this thread. You are talking about a relationship between a man and a woman. If you want the inside advantage listen to what Rebel said.

 

My 2 cents:

Learn from your mistakes(and tips from chicks) and move the f*ck on. I'm willing to bet the next chick tops this one that you are so hung up on.

[ll rdny ll]

Stay single, for a while.

Then nail that girl who's dating "That guy that you used to hang out with, but never really got along with." The one that hates her boyfriend an is looking for a way out.

 

That's what I did, and It worked out lovely for me. We've been together for 3 years now, and we have a beautiful baby girl.

Maybe don't do exactly what I did, but just wait. I'm assuming that you're young and probably a virgin based on the fact that your relationship start date is your Member Title (this is not an attack on you, but an observation.)

 

It's not worth what you're going to go through, just move on and keep your chin up.

Good Luck to you.

[Fireman]

Step 1: Don't communicate over FaceBook. Use words and expressions and talk to eachother.

[johnny_zoo]

As stated, "Don't put the pussy on a pedestal." WOmen are tough elements of life, personally I just enter relationships when I really feel my life is calm and I have enough time and patience for more hassle. Yes, the touch of a woman's lips, skin and etc. are special but you have to get your sh*t together before you go on talking to her. As others said, act cold, relax, be cool, don't go after her too much because if you do she may keep moving away, if you don't you still have chances. Let her think things through and make up her mind. I'd recommend seeing her personally if you haven't yet for a brief talk, but don't pressure her into anything, let her talk, let her control the conversation and make it brief so she won't feel too emotional.

 

I would find this a stupid and unnecessary tip at times but when I listen to the radio late at night the show Loveline is on and they're professionals that deal with this type of stuff so perhaps calling them would be a good idea. Of course I may look like an ass recommending a radio show, but trust me, they're good.

 

EDIT: Oh, and arsenal_fan speaks the truth if you do possibly get back together.

This is all really good advice in here. I'm definitely gonna put some of this to good use with a girl I have my sights on.

[Smith John]

You two sound like a whack ass Ross and Rachel.

 

And you "love" her after 1 month? What is this, a romantic comedy?

LOL

 

Pretty much what I was thinking. I mean, I've heard of love at first sight and all, but come on, how could you love somebody after a month?

 

As for relationship advice? Apologies my friend, but I'm not touching that with a barge pole. Understanding women is a bit like chasing your own shadow.

[Chargr]

Lol OP it is done. When a girl calls for a break, that means 95% of the time its over. She probably has someone lined up too.

 

GTFO, stop all contact, delete of facebook, phone, dont txt. Everything. srs. She might even come back crawling when you do this.

 

 

but GTFO. Just being there is a waste.

[unopescio]

GTFO, stop all contact, delete of facebook, phone, dont txt. Everything. srs. She might even come back crawling when you do this.

This. In her crazy mind it might draw her back to you. Otherwise its over anyway!

[DP Man]

Just an update for you all~

 

We are friends again for now at least, she realised how stupid it was to push me away and she said she can't live without me. I found out through someone else that she loves me a lot still but she needs to sort her life out first.

[Guest]

Just an update for you all~

 

We are friends again for now at least, she realised how stupid it was to push me away and she said she can't live without me. I found out through someone else that she loves me a lot still but she needs to sort her life out first.

Actually, looking at your forum name, I'm not suprised why she left you.

 

 

 

I left that joke for when he got things sorted out.... So I didn't piss anyone off when he was in agony... or something.

 

I'm a dick, what can I do?

 

Also, it's impossibru to escape the friendzone. Break ALL contact with her as said before and then she'll come crawling back.

That's how the f*cked up minds of women work.

[Chillzz01]

Im having almost the same exact situation as the OP atm. I actually googled my situation and this topic popped up. Anyway, same as the OP my now ex girl wanted to take a "break" because because she didn't feel like she liked me enough to be in a relationship. She said "I dont date best friends" So she wanted to stay best friends. A hour or so after we broke up she stated kissing me and stuff idk why. The next day my group and i were hanging out (shes in my group) me and my friend went home she stood and hanged with my other best friend for a bit. I find out a 2 days later from my other best friend that she almost had sex with him and showed him her body. That same day just before i found out what happened she deleted my number, facebook, skype and any form of communication from me. I tried calling her but she said "Fu*k off" and that was it. I still didn't hear anything back from her. It turns out shes trying to hook up with both of my best friends at the same time. They also feel that something is wrong and weird. Is been a few days. I have very strong feelings for her even though we have been only dating for 2 months. Idk what to do. I dont mean to take the spotlight from the OP but im at a difficult situation and very confused. Any help is appreciated. As to the OP if things dont work out as my best friend told me just keep on trucking.

Edited August 17, 2012 by Chillzz01

[El Zilcho]

 

There is no such thing as a 'break'. It's a euphemism to spare your feelings. The relationship is over and you should move on.

Want some advice? The girl needed someone strong to take charge of her, weak people gravitate towards those who are dominant and commanding. You however felt that the best course of action was to coddle her, pander to her insecurities, in doing so you made yourself look insecure and desperate. She most likely sensed this which only exacerbated her own feelings of worthlessness. You should have been stronger.

Absolutely spot on.

 

You're surrendering the relationship if you do this. Try and surprise or excite her, show her you aren't dull or weak. Perhaps this last ditch move may reignite something between you. If not, call it quits because 'breaks' truly are dire straits. I think you've also fallen into the classic trap of over complimenting, pandering, etc. You must show some strength, be a man about it. Women like that; they don't want or need ass kissing. You care about her a lot, and while the usual response is being nice, you must balance this with the character traits that make you attractive in the first place. Some assertiveness, power, humour, fun.

 

Good luck mate.

[Burbalade]

A "break" basically means she just wants to go make out with and/or f*ck other guys to see she likes them any better than you. It's her way of ending the relationship, but keeping enough of it so that if she doesn't find anything better in a timely manner she can continue to take advantage of you until she does.

 

I'm sorry you're in this situation, and I know it sucks, but just end it now and move on. It'll save you a lot of hurt later on.

[Rebel]

Im having almost the same exact situation as the OP atm. I actually googled my situation and this topic popped up. Anyway, same as the OP my now ex girl wanted to take a "break" because because she didn't feel like she liked me enough to be in a relationship. She said "I dont date best friends" So she wanted to stay best friends. A hour or so after we broke up she stated kissing me and stuff idk why. The next day my group and i were hanging out (shes in my group) me and my friend went home she stood and hanged with my other best friend for a bit. I find out a 2 days later from my other best friend that she almost had sex with him and showed him her body. That same day just before i found out what happened she deleted my number, facebook, skype and any form of communication from me. I tried calling her but she said "Fu*k off" and that was it. I still didn't hear anything back from her. It turns out shes trying to hook up with both of my best friends at the same time. They also feel that something is wrong and weird. Is been a few days. I have very strong feelings for her even though we have been only dating for 2 months. Idk what to do. I dont mean to take the spotlight from the OP but im at a difficult situation and very confused. Any help is appreciated. As to the OP if things dont work out as my best friend told me just keep on trucking.

Forget her and move on. She sounds like a crazy f*cking bitch to me, genuine nice girls don't go whoring around with guys and basically use them either. She's not even worth you getting worked up about it. If she thinks she can get away with it she's very very wrong. Once word gets around she'll get a terrible reputation. Go find yourself a girl who will treat you right and wont f*ck you over like that.

[trip]

Just an update for you all~

 

We are friends again for now at least, she realised how stupid it was to push me away and she said she can't live without me. I found out through someone else that she loves me a lot still but she needs to sort her life out first.

Girls are master manipulators. Enjoy being strung along until she finds another fancy.

 

I'm not trying to be a dick. I just don't want to see a brother go down a bad road and lose a bunch of time that could be used for finding a chick that has your best interests in her heart too - and not just hers.

 

Love isn't always permanent. Young love is almost never permanent. I'm not saying that it isn't real, but I believe it is more experimental love than honest love. Enjoy any love...just understand that the spark of the love may die before the actual love. I still love all of my old girlfriends, but I sure as hell wouldn't want to be with them .

 

In any case - good luck. I hope you two have a good long solid friendship - even if it just means a platonic one.

[Dingdongs]

 

Just an update for you all~

 

We are friends again for now at least, she realised how stupid it was to push me away and she said she can't live without me. I found out through someone else that she loves me a lot still but she needs to sort her life out first.

I'm sorry but you're letting her treat you like a piece of sh*t. Trip is completely right. Do you see what you're doing here? It's fine for her to f*ck with you and tell you that she needs to "sort out her life" (what f*cking bullsh*t) because, after all, she loves you a lot right? I'm sorry but you're just setting yourself up for more pain... anyone who has had experience with girls will tell you this. I went through the SAME exact thing - I let a girl take control of me like this and you just end up more hurt in the end. It isn't worth it. Tell her to f*cking shape up and be your girlfriend again, or you're done. If you don't, prepare for a really sh*tty next couple of months of on and off crap from her until she finally tells you she has a boyfriend who keeps her in line and is strong.

[EscoLehGo]

Yea dude, cancel that bitch like Nino. Being "friends" with your exs is a terrible idea, especially if they dicked you around while you were together.