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Nationstates "GTA Forums" Regional Discussion

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Private Human Class John Glassbanger is a simple man. He loves his wife, his otter, and his country. He hadn't ever known hate like that which currently fills his heart as he stares across that vast expanse of ocean, Amsterdon bound.


Expect fierce and loyal opposition, they were told - or rather, it was shouted at them from security director Climbout. "These people believe us to be the transgressors. We will need to battle that assumption every step of the way and show them why The Otter Archipelago is the best country in the world!"


Funny, John thinks, as he straps into the tandem with the rest of his squad, I was planning on showing them why you don't f*ck with us. He checks the clip on his rifle and takes aim out the window of his tandem as they are released from the carrier and plummet towards the coast. The decent is rocky, buffeted by large, showy explosions and screaming with sirens.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I will be brief. The Otter Archipelago has declared war on the nation of Amsterdon following the terrorist attack on our capital.


I hope we can count on your support in this trying time; not since the K9K9 scandal has our nation been so traumatized.


We also thank you all for the continued endorsement. We are closing the gap swiftly, and we've done so without compromising our beliefs.


- Charisma Nettlebaum


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El Zilcho
and we've done so without compromising our beliefs.


- Charisma Nettlebaum

What exactly are your beliefs on delegate reform? If you do intend to become delegate, what would you change? You're the only competitor to still be campaigning on hot air; you've detailed no plans for change whatsoever.


We urge any undecided voters to observe our Manifesto here.


Tulija will continue non intervention between the matters of Amsterdon and the Archipelago - it hopes that before too long, diplomatic solutions can be sought as they have been for an extended time prior to this.

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After initially supporting multiple nations in order to keep the peace and because of plain unawareness of the situation due to internal struggles the United Kingdom of Santos Castillos has decided it is a time for actions and not for words and thus we have decided to align ourselves with The Meritocratic Republic of Tulija and support their campaign. We see our beliefs reflected in this candidate and promise our full support not only during this campaign but afterwards in the search for a diplomatic platform to facilitate negotiations between nations.

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It is the Otter Archipelago whom is the aggressor here. They flew their squadron of propaganda planes into Amsterdonian territory then exploded them over population centres, putting our citizens at grave risk. They caused significant damage to buildings, and perpetrated a severe act of aggression. Not to mention the poor black haired pigmy wolf, oh god won't someone please think of the black haired pigmy wolf.


We were met with aggression and we responded with aggression. The hypocritical regime has no right to take the moral high ground and it's reckless behaviour has once again threatened the peace of the region. If the Archipelago wants a war it will receive a war.



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Non intervention, the mark of a true leader?


Our beliefs are simple - we do not need to endorse goverments vastly incongruent to our own in order to pander for votes. You sicken us with your readiness to pull an about face to get inches ahead.


We will lead by - and I know this is a foreign concept to you - leading. Now shove off, we're at war.


- Charisma Nettlebaum

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El Zilcho
We will lead by - and I know this is a foreign concept to you - leading. Now shove off, we're at war.


- Charisma Nettlebaum

Ah, you intend to be a despot? This is the role of delegate, not President, we do not need a nation who is unwilling to declare why it should be delegate, other than wanting to 'lead'.


Non intervention is the mark of a delegate who understands that it isn't the world police - a lesson needing to be learnt by you perhaps? There are many ideologically alternate nations whose conduct has been far more becoming of a delegate than yourself.


- Taverington

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On the far eastern corner of Amsterdon a small isolated communications towers looks out over the desolate landscape, a young officer steps outside for a cigarette. He lights his smoke then stuffs his hands deep inside his pockets and shivers; a cold and crisp dawn. “Oh wow look at that, a meteor shower” he gazed in amazement at the shooting stars making their way gracefully across the sky.


“Hey Yohan, come look at thi-“ Suddenly one of the meteors bursts into a bright, piercing pulse of light, the officer shields his eyes.

“What the...” The lights inside the tower begin to flicker, then, darkness. Another man stumbles out of the building.

“Hey all the machinery has stopped working, if it’s a blackout shouldn’t the back-up generators be kicking in?”


Far in the distance more pulses could be seen, each one briefly illuminating the dark dreary sky.


“What. The. f*ck. What the f*ck man. What the hell’s going on?” said Yohan, startled.

“I don’t know Yohan, something’s up. What do we do we can’t reach HQ, all the equipment is offline.”

“Let’s just sit here and wait, I’m sure they’ll send someone. Or maybe the back-up generators will start working. Either way we can’t leave. Our orders are to stay here. I’ll go wake up the other men.”


After a few minutes sat in the small canteen, the group of men posted to comm. tower 14-ST began to hear a faint grumbling noise in the distance.


“Do you think that’s help?” inquired Private Willems.

“Don’t be silly, it’s been barely 15 minutes and the closest supply depot is over 200km away”.

“Well then sir, what is it?”


All the men rose up. The grumbling was closer now and much louder. A couple of glasses on the wooden table began to shake, the water in them gently rippling.


“Come with me” Ordered the officer in charge, leading the men outside. It was still relatively dark but small moving objects could be made out in the distance.

“Sir was it that?”


The men all stared into the distance trying to pick out exactly what the objects were. Then Sgt. Mathijsen realised what was happening.

“It was a pleasure serving with you men.”


Suddenly the men came under fire from all directions. Private Willems, Private Jackson and Private Truman all were killed instantly, their guts splattering the rest of the men and the comm. station like a children’s TV show gunging. Sgt. Mathijsen’s right arm was blown off before a volley of shots ripped through his abdomen, splitting him in half like a magician’s mutilated assistant. His legs flying in one direction and his torso in another. The rest of the men began to run, but they were cut down in seconds. Their lifeless bodies being crushed beneath the thundering mechanised troop carriers filled with battle-ready soldiers.


"Yeeaaah listen to them skulls pop. Onwards Otters, onwards!" Cried a platoon leader with a head the size of Jeep's wheel: The Amsterdonian-Otterian war was under way.

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Is our First Citizen secretly aligned with aliens? Does Marcus Yeltsin beat children in the privacy of his own home? Find out the answer to these questions and more in today's issue!



"And here I thought they'd learned by now." Marcus Yeltsin stood in the middle of Julius' office reading the headline out loud. Marc was never a man to be mocked. On a campaign in Egypt he sewed five soldiers to deer pelts and released them into the desert, then hunted them alone and naked with a Roman sword for simply laughing at the customary Egyptian practice of putting soot around your eyes.


"Albus, send someone to burn down their office. And take whomever wrote this and bring him to me at once."


The room was stiff due to the locked windows and thermostat turned to 102. First Citizen Julius Putin would not have it any other way. Just like he would not have the purple shag carpeting, red curtains, soft and delightfully fun to sit in royal chairs and the solid blackwood desk any other way. He was a determined man and in the words of Cato the Smirnoff, "He was a man of intellect, taste, efficiency, diversity, cleanliness and sharp knives."


"Well Marcus do you have any other stifling news today? I've wanted to visit the media personalities we stashed in the Red Chamber all day but politics has a way of never letting a man leisure."


"Of course, Julius. There's just the matter of an attack in the Otter Archipelago in the north. Apparently the Regional Forum is in a more fragile state than we thought. Senators were killed and if our reports are right several kids as well." Marcus slouched into a plush cushioned couch on against the wall and called for a glass of brandy.


"Send a letter of condolences to the senators and any other official that is grieving. My my, I've got way too much stress on my traps lately, I need to get a shoulder massage this evening, would you like to accompany me?"


"Putin I think there are more pressing matters-"


"Nonsense. We are too small a target for any terrorist at this point, and thanks to the connections of the previous rulers I am quite apt to weed out any man unhonorable enough to attempt it. You forget that we just licensed those national barcodes for the public not long ago. We have absolutely nothing to worry about, Marc. Please, finish your brandy and let us be off." Julius stood up and looked out of the large glass walls that made the back of his office. Autumn was on its way. It's coming too fast , Julius Putin thought, and most of the farmers would probably fail to get their entire crop output. This was more urgent than some Otter being shot in his quaint political office. Somewhere in the Republic a barcoded plebeian was going to starve because of the man he loved in office was inept to rule.


"Marcus, issue out four-hundred Denarii to every base citizen. Then send an additional eight-hundred to all of our soldiers as gifts for their loyalty to our plans."


"Aye, sir. I'll give word to the treasury as we head out. Say, what's better the Shiatsu or the Swedish massage?"


"I trust the Swedish as far as I can throw them, we'll get a Shiatsu and then maybe some tuna rolls after. On point though, we're finally on the level to change things in this great nation." Julius thought for a moment. "We're going to have a parade tomorrow." And with that a thin smile emerged on Putin's face as he turned around and began writing an edict to outlaw something else.





It was late in the year but a beautiful day in the Republic, Marcus thought to himself as he strode into the public forum alongside Julius. A sea of cheers and waving pink flags marked their entrance into the parade and they soaked up the praise with the same beautiful smiles they walked into office with. The march went from the registration office down along Main Street through the various local coffee repositories and performers guilds in downtown all the way to the Royal Villa.


The Republic was licking it's own wounds for now. The wars had just ended and most of the patricians that formed the senate were dead or in exile. Most of the annexed nations that belonged to Prosperous Romans simply stopped paying tribune, and would have to be dealt with in time.


When they reached the Villa, a large wooden platform rose above street level by ten feet. A large wooden pole stood alone in the center of the platform. The two officials walked onto it and Julius held his hands out to signal silence. The crowd hushed to less than a whisper. He smiled and waved to a window in his Villa to begin the final event.


The doors to his Royal Villa opened in perfectly-oiled silence and two large officers carried a pink, fleshy glob that resembled a man by his hands to the stage. Marcus couldn't tell if the poor soul was alive until he was pulled up against a pole and pushed up into the air for the whole crowd to see, because at that point he began to let out a few tears onto his raw flesh.


"We are all Romans here, this needs no introduction. The old ways were shunned as brutal by foreign dignitaries some years ago and we stopped our ways to appease the public eye. But no more, Romans. From now on we return to the way things are. I give you a personal gift, Romans. This is journalist Dmitri Atius and he has earned his lack for skin due to his crimes against you and I." Julius spoke with a grand sense of duty to himself and the people of Rome. He would later go home to his wife and ravage her in bed for two and a half hours straight with only chalk as a lubricant, and about halfway through the session, cinnamon.


"The numerous accounts of slander to our great people is in and of itself worthy of the blade, however Dmitri has done far worse... he has been in communication with enemies of the state and tried passing on fragile information to the Amsterdonii scum across the sea. This man alone tried to break the empire Republic, and this man alone will pay the price for it. The various bags of salt on every streetcorner are at your disposal, my people. Do as you see fit to this traitor, it is but one more gift I will send to you from a loving First Citizen to his public." Julius turned around with his royal posse and walked into the Villa, promptly locking the doors to the sounds of thousands of Romans cheering and one sad soul attempting to cry through a flayed larynx.

Edited by Tyler

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In the wake of the terrorist attack on the Otter Archipelago's capital yesterday, the attacked nation has declared a state of open war against the Federation of Amsterdon.


A press release from the Otterian government several hours after the attack claimed that the killings were the result of "Amsterdonian death squads," a suggestion evidenced by the outfits of the attackers, one of which was reportedly captured but whose existence has not yet been publicly demonstrated. Just hours later, Otterian leader Charisma Nettlebaum declared war on the Federation of Amsterdon.


In response, the Federation of Amsterdon accused the Otter Archipelago of starting the initial conflict by flying aircraft filled with propaganda over its territory. Amsterdon, which has a long track record of restricting its citizens' rights and freedoms, has yet to produce evidence for this claim.


As of yet, the Okurkan government has not released an official statement on the war.




President Vaclav Holub rubbed his temples. He really was getting to old for this. The Federal Republic, loved as it was by him, needed someone with a bit more vitality than he.


Prime Minister Lenka Gjuricova sat at the table few seats away, across from him. She was young--well, young compared to him--but she was shy. Both of them were sheep in sheep's clothing, in a manner of speaking. Thankfully, they both had the rest of the table to handle some of the more...sensitive aspects of foreign policy.


"Gentlemen and Ms. Lenka, the Otterians and Amsterdonians have gone to war," he said. Mikuláš Bacik, the Director of Foreign Affairs, responded to the invitation to speak first.

"Mr. Vaclav"--as the President had told everyone to call him--"Our relationship with the Otterian government and its people are friendly but thankfully, non-binding. Even if Tulija gets involved, we do not have any significant military alliances that mandate our involvement in this war."


"A darn good thing too," said Karel Sviha, the Director of Military Services. "Our forces are at best at peacekeeping and territory defense levels. The militaries of the Archipelago and of Amsterdon are decisively much larger and more advanced. If we happened to get involved in the war, we would best serve as an auxiliary force."

"Suppose the Amsterdonians win and we are forced into conflict?" the President asked.

"In the event that they go for broke, the combined armies of Tulija and ours should be enough to at least repel them from making significant gains at our borders," Sviha continued. "If Shaffey gets involved, we may be in trouble, but Mikuláš would tell you that the Amsterdonians and Shaffeyans don't exactly see eye-to-eye, birds of a feather as they might be."

"Well thankfully, I doubt the Amsterdonians would push much farther than the Archipelago. They have no reason to come for us too."

Everyone in the room nodded.


"No doubt that it wouldn't hurt to contact the Tulijans about plans for intervention," Bacik said. "Try to get them to let the two nations duke it out. At the very least, let them know that we don't want to get dragged between two juggernauts."

Everyone in the room nodded again. It wasn't fair to say that Okurkans were culturally inclined to cloak-and-dagger politics, because that would suggest some level of violence and deceit. Rather, Okurkans knew to look out for themselves and not let pride or politics get in the way of self-preservation. Brains over brawn.


"Let's get the press conference ready to go," the President said. Maybe he wasn't too old for this.

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In an undisclosed location deep beneath the capital of Leider Stad, the Amsterdonian military top brass sits around a large black table, maps are spread all over, with long sticks pushing around small blocks of coloured plastic.


The invasion into Amsterdonian territory had been quick and coordinated, making use of EMP weaponry to disrupt the chain of command and isolate the troops serving on the borders. They stood no chance; casualty figures were already running into the thousands. The generals could do nothing to warn their men of the impending attack and wave of Archipelago soldiers who quickly overran them in their Tandem troop transport vehicles. An effective response could not be mobilised in time and the Otters had managed to puncture the defences on multiple fronts and were now digging in.


Meanwhile back in the safety of the capital city which was thousands of miles from the fighting, John was in the military command bunker discussing war strategy with his generals.

“It looks like our intelligence was correct sir, our satellites have picked up 4 Otterian kidnap squads sent to capture you.” General Schwarzeneggerkopf the chief of staff, informed John.

An observant young officer interjected:

“Wait, so you mean to tell me that our intelligence services could pick up a few small units which came in with the purpose of trying to remain undetected. Yet we weren’t able to notice a large invasion force until it was only kilometres away from our borders?”

“Erm, well err, you see, erm it’s err it’s... APPREHEND THAT MAN AND HAVE HIM TAKEN AWAY!” Schwarzeneggerkopf ordered.


John looked on as the young officer was lead away by 2 burly looking men. They took him through a large double door then 3 loud gunshots were heard. John nodded to Schwarzeneggerkopf.

“Back to the kidnap squads general, is my body double in place?”

“Yes sir, he’s at the mountain retreat. We’ve planted false information which will lead the Otters to believe that’s where you’re staying. They’ll meet fierce “resistance” but ultimately will succeed in their efforts. We implanted tracking devices in his scrotum this morning.”


The lack of public appearances whilst his father was alive meant very little was known of John outside of Amsterdon, including his physical appearance. But surely it wouldn’t take the Otters long to realise they in fact had captured a stooge.



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El Zilcho

Extracts from the Concordánce Times:


War Intensifies as Archipelago Surges

Sporadic reports from Amsterdon indicate significant initial gains by the numerically inferior Otterian forces today. Despite being dwarfed by the magnitude of the Amsterdonian regimes military and police forces, the technologically advanced aggressors of the Archipelago have been blitzing through coastal and border defences. Communications disarray has led to the major reinforcements of Amsterdon waiting beyond the conflict zone, either unaware or unable to combine their efforts with the border patrols who have been overrun. In a similar vein, Otterian naval forces continue their bombardment, while the large Amsterdonian air force awaits authorisation to advance. Internationally, Tulija has pledged neutrality, as has Okurka. Both sides are advocating that the two aggrieved nations be allowed to settle their differences once and for all, with both the Tulijan Incumbent and Shadow Foreign Ministers agreeing that "international blood shed or large scale coalitions would only serve to further increase the death toll. These two arch nemesis' have a score to settle, and while we regret the need for war, we cannot force the use of diplomatic discussion, which has so significantly failed in the past." Executive Minister Hugh Daxley was unavailable for further comment.


Free Trade and Border Treaty 'Speculation'

Purportedly leaked documents from the International Assembly Commission in Concordánce point toward Tulijan plans for "closer GTAForum links" including an internationally linked "extraregional foreign policy" "universal free trade" and "free travel". Although the details of the documents, and their real authenticity, are unknown, the IAC has been quoted as saying "the plans outlined are definitely progressive." Whether or not the free trade and travel proposals will go down well internationally is unknown, but WA Delegate Arthur Kaylor has stressed that such close bonds with the region would be "one of his greatest victories" in the office of Delegate. The potential for mutually enriching free trade and possible open border agreements have raised eyebrows, particularly the latter (with two nations at war, many are questioning this ideas validity in our current climate).


Liberal Party Pledges New Direction

Tulija's hugely popular Liberal party have again risen on the opinion polls ahead of December's General Election (August saw them poised at 34%, with September polls reading off 44% approval), largely off the back of their pledges to increase Educational options and reform Consulary House and Directorial privileges. Incumbent Hugh Daxley (previously linked to both the Meritocratics and Progressives), will be unable to stand for re-election this Autumn, having served consecutive terms after his victories in the 2004 and 2008 elections. Liberal party leader Jeremy Haines faces internal competition for Executive Ministerial candidate; but despite this discord, the parties policies are striking huge chords with the electorate. With Republican Party competition dwindling following the revelation that party leader Oswald Austin appointed Senators from his own jurisdiction, the Progressive party hold a majority of only 11% over the Liberals. Debate season begins in October, although the Directorate election run off only picks up steam during the final third of November due to the Independent Mandate.

Edited by El Zilcho

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Fate was on our side, PHC John 'Frothy' Glassbanger reflects as he retires from watch and heads for his bunk. The Amsterdonians weren't up for a fight; it was too easy. Obviously the command intelligence (CUiq, the first officially recognized sentient AI in the Archipelago, was the face of the department) recognized the Otterian techical superiority, their ability to strike relatively quickly and with few casualities - on both sides.  But Frothy is uneasy. It didn't feel like digging in had been part of the plan.


The blitz of their arrival had shaken him to the very core; his weapon alone must have carved through an entire squadron. The retaliation was fierce and angry but incredibly disorganised. They just kept swarming, as if their number would protect them. It was like the TV miniseries about the Bigtopian War, the bodies literally stacking up. Bodies of soldiers, thank the Otter, but soldiers with no heart.


Occupation had gone surprisingly well too; especially for what felt like an improvised strategy every step of the way. The locals... They were scary. That was the only way to put it - scary like zombies, pod people, like e-heads in the clubs back home, stumbling around in a daze but not angry or welcoming either. Apathetic. That's what gave Frothy the creeps. Doubtless their friends, family, had been dipatched in the engagement, but there was little to no interaction whatsoever.  They ate the free food and sought medical attention from the Otterian medical encampments (cyborg foot and eyeball prostheses were flying off the shelves) and happily read the informational pamphlets about civil revolt and What it Can Do for You. Far from any scenario they had been briefed to expect. 


The unasked question that seems to hover about, peskily toying with Frothy's tensions, nagging at every soldier, hybrid, and mech on site: Where is the opposition? He hops into his bunk and slips into a troubled sleep. Memories of the men he'd killed begin to taunt him. Faces laughing tears of blood and children taking up rifles, carving his name on to the rounds before jamming them wildly into magazines and...


The explosion tears Frothy's leg clean from his body and he has time to wonder how he managed to kick himself in the face before he realizes that the encampment is under attack. Bombardment. The Amsterdonians are blitzkreiging their own cities. He screams and the world fades from fiery red to black - the deafening sounds of battle blossoming around him and receding down an endless hallway all at once.


The retreat is swift, the chaos is is ruinous.




EHWC Sean "RoboTap" Ewing of OtTER team 5 calibrates his senses. Somehow, the enemy had been warned in advance and his 5 man squadron was now a pair of commandos. The scouts were taken out first, cocky and unaware that they were walking into a trap. The Amsterdonian Death Squad units had taken delight in overpowering and dismantling the elite fighting units - pulling apart their implants and synthetics as they screamed in horror... crudely defiling them. It was enough to drive DeathScare into a blind rage, and he managed to eviscerate a roomful of them before his psicomm went dead. Now it's just RoboTap and Drexel.


Drexel sees what RoboTap sees as if it's with her own eyes and vice versa. They've worked togther for so long that sometimes, in the sh*t, it's almost as if they are one person with two avatars. They know John is in the building. They know there are still at least thirty Death Squad In the vicinity. They are pissed off. And with the push of a button, they are both suddenly incredibly high.


A movement through a wall thirty feet ahead and RoboTap's rifle lets out a muffled WUMP. What's left of the body splats loudly on the floor and Drexel's blade carves a thick line across a man's throat. Gurgles. Screams. WUMP and more death follows; the lights are tripped and the world expands in thermal signatures and echolocation. Two bodies dance through ruined hallways, weapons firing and hearts pounding in rythm and blood painting the walls.


A voice close to Drexel says "Don't shoot" and it is over. John is taken into custody along with a pair of aides and four traumatised civilians. The building is razed. The cocaine and psychotropics loosen their hold, and Robotap and Drexel feel almost human again.




The Castillian megacruiseliner Atlas Shirked carves a sleek path through the dark tumultuous waters of the Pathfinder Straight; its garguantuan displacement allowing for a relatively smooth ride for the six thousand partiers aboard.  The sun has set, the stars are out, happy hour is underway, and the upper crust of the region can finally put the horrors of recent events behind them with a glass of the finest Roman wines and delicacies from as far as Shaffey and Arkiasis.


Trent Dogood, the star of a recent Tujilan blockbuster about neighbors sitting around on porches and doing nothing interesting is regaling a gaggle of Okurkan Fotune 500 CEOs about stories on set.  Arius Rasputin, the Roman Foreign Attache to Hermanny, is deciding which rich Otterian's daughter he is going to brutalise in his cabin tonight. And Paul Morris, the wealthiest man in GTAForums and the CEO of the Goldistanian tech company Gravy!, is scribbling furiously on a serviette; inspiration hit and he's absolutely sure that this new device he's just designed is going to put and end to world suffering.


The pleasure cruise left Okurka four days previously, bound for the tropical landscapes, beaches, and degeneracy between the warm waters of Captonia and the Otter Archipelago. The laws are lax and inviting in the Archipelago - nearly every depraved adventure possible can be explored. And the Eastern Waterfall Fiords of Captonia are a magical sight to behold; in fact, Trent Dogood is now explaining how they would be the perfect backdrop in a film he's trying to produce about a loveless marriage that sticks together because why not.


A shadow stalks the massive ship. Ominous, looming, and deadly. A periscope breaches the warm wash of waves above and fixates on the hull, scanning, slowly scheming. Below, computers plot, men sweat nervously, and the commanding officer of the Amsterdonian submarine seizes the opportunity to carry out his orders. 


"Fire 6, 4, 3."

"Torpedoes away."

A tense minute. Screws can be heard amplified, reverberating around the hull of the submarine like an echo in the Okurkan Rift Valley. The song "Celebrate" by Kool and the Gang can be heard faintly, warbling. Then a muted popping sound. Twice. Thrice.

"Three direct hits."


"She's broken, bow dropping fast. Stern listing hard to port."

"Fire 2"

"Incinerator away."


The screws tear through the water again - though this time, the environment is chaotic. The comms officer swears he can hear screaming through his cans, though the he can't be sure if it's human suffering or the force of the cruiseship's hull rending itself apart.


"The stern is aflame. Supreme Leader in heaven forgive us."

"Silence your tounge or I will tear it out, ensign. We are the very embodiment of John tonight. We are his limb. We are his raging hardon of death." In point of fact, the XO is feeling a swell in his groin. It is not unpleasant.


"Mark a heading to take us on a fly-by."


"I'm going to chum the waters."

Edited by Otter

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Attention, The Meritocratic Republic of Tulija, The Aquatic Weasels of The Otter Archipelago, and The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey!



We are having a delegatory election debate, and, wait for it, available to watch exclusively on CRTV PPV channel! For 75 asonmas/month only, get to watch all the latest and greatest, only on CRT PPV!


Questions may or may not focus on subjects as your plans to increase population and interest [improve activity basically] and improving GTA Forums region in general, or even why your nation is extremely fat [i'm looking at you Shaffey]. These questions will be made and asked by the CDC [Citizen's Debate Commission], which consists of 3 moderators, their nations namely: The Federation of Amsterdon, The Republic of Prosperous Romans, and The Kingdom of Chrysothemis.


Just to remind you of the electees, they're The Meritocratic Republic of Tulija, The Aquatic Weasels of The Otter Archipelago, and last but not least, The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey *burst into laughter*


We're waiting for the electees' response before starting. Though honestly we don't care about your opinions on this, as you're forced to participate, otherwise you won't be receiving any free shish kebab from The Kingdom of Chrysothemis.


...Any questions regarding this debate?


Thank you.

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El Zilcho

We welcome the prospect of a debate, but somehow feel as if our competitors wouldn't be able to field a fair opposition in the midst of a bloody war. Perhaps we should wait until more peaceful climes before we stir political interest?


Tulijan ships are in the area to assist in rescuing the survivors of the torpedoed Atlas Shirked.

And the Trent Dogood reference was delicious, great satire there Otter.

Edited by El Zilcho

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Intellibrief 5014.345.45

Tujillan rescue maneuvers have combined with out own efforts to search the area for survivors.

Many survivors are badly burned, injured... Or suffering grievous shark bites.

Rescue tally as of 0900 this morning is an estimated 650...


The aggressor is long gone but reports from survivors indicate that a submarine rose shortly after the attack flying the Amsterdonian colors. Sailors mounted the deck and began strafing the water with machine gun fire. This has been confirmed by multiple sources.



OOC - thanks Zilch, wanted this one to be harrowing yet cheeky. wink.gif




From the Desk of Regina Mayweather


Members of the cabinet, we would be pleased to address any concerns regarding our desire to reclaim the delegate position.


Obviously, as the Tujilan envoy has suggested, we are not in a rush to force the region's hand. Yet we welcome this opportunity to clear the waters.


Additionally, the Archipelago would like to thank Tujila for their continued rescue efforts. We recommend a regional commendation for their swift response and humanitarian goals.



Edited by Otter

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Amsterdonian Evening News




The war with the Otters rages on




The might of Amsterdonian forces repels a cowardly surprise attack



Tragedy in Archipelago waters, but, is plotting afoot?




Supreme Leader laid to rest in a huge ceremony in the capital




And now you're anchor... Rick De Haan.


user posted image


Good evening citizens of the Federation.

After the surprise attack and invasion by Otterian forces early on Saturday the 22nd of September: a date which will live in infamy, Amsterdonian forces were immediately gathered and prepared for a counter offensive to drive the smelly infidels from whence they came. And we can report that even as I speak our forces continue to repel the Otters back, inch by inch, step by step. We shall take no prisoners, only the heads from their lifeless bodies. John himself was the mastermind behind the counter offensive, he is the embodiment of Amsterdon and it's will, with John as our leader no enemy and no foe shall ever overcome us.


In response to the invasion, a nearby submarine, which although outdated compared to the more modern Amsterdonian vessels, was sent into Archipelago waters as it was the closest, under specific orders to sink any military target that it finds. Otterian civilians are a justified target, however any Otterian civilian ship is sure to contain passengers from around the region, passengers who are innocent and whom Amsterdon has no quarrel with. And regretfully it mistook a luxury cruise liner for an Otterian battleship. A message from the defence department was relayed via a spokesperson to the international community:


"We deeply regret the actions which took place in the Pathfinder Straight last night. It is deplorable that innocent lives were lost and we sincerely apologise to all nations not involved in the conflict who lost lives."


It is believed that the Otters purposefully interfered with the submarines communications and planted false intelligence that the ship was a military vessel. It was a false flag attack by the Otters to deliberately try and involve the regional community in the war by attacking innocent civilians from nations within the region. How else would a nation of such supposedly advanced technology fail to identify a large and technologically outdated submarine deep within it's territorial waters, and not intercept it. The Otters are an extremely devious nation and they are not above sacrificing their own people in order to benefit themselves.



In other news the Supreme Leader was finally laid to rest earlier today, nearly one month after the great man's assassination. It was August 26th when the lone gunman managed to find his way inside the leader's palace, and opened fire killing him where he stood. It was an attack which shocked and shook the Federation, but one which strengthened it also. Under the leadership of the Supreme Leader's son, John, this nation is sure to continue to flourish and achieve great things. The Supreme Leader was placed in eternal rest in the national mausoleum, and his body shall be preserved so that future generations can bask in his glory and wisdom. A 1200 gun salute marked the event as well as a military fly past and a small parade. An Otterian flag was also burned in order to commemorate his favourite pastime and hobby.


Tomorrow his son will be given his official title and name, which the whole nation is looking forward to.


This has been Rick De Haan. Thankyou and goodnight, and as always: Glory to the Federation of Amsterdon.


Edited by GTA_stu

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OOC: I have started on a map for the NS region because we're getting more into talking about territories and geographical features in our own countries and in others. I have generated two maps which seem suitable here and here, with the first map showing the four most active countries (Shaffey excluded, my bad) right now. I'd be happy to amend these if people ask but I want to save room for other nations. If we don't want them, then that's cool too. Gimme feedback please.




Naval Services Mobilize in Wake of Cruiseliner Attack


As experts and non-experts alike discuss the sinking of the Atlas Shirked that took place yesterday evening, both branches of the Okurkan Federal Naval Service have been mobilized by the federal government to begin patrolling local and international waters, as well as assisting the governments involved in the sinking with logistics and medical aid.


This has been the first physically international act performed by the Federal Republic of Okurka since its formation from its past regime fifteen years ago. Outside commentators liken the move to a porcupine flexing its spines, but the federal government has directly repudiated suggestions that the deployment of both the Civilianized Naval Service and the Militarized Naval Service are meant to be aggressive.


"We are waiting for a more concrete explanation of the events that passed yesterday before we start picking any sides but our own," said Prime Minister Lenka Gjuricova this morning. "Right now, our primary concern is aiding our friends abroad in dealing with this tragedy and retrieving our citizens who have had the severe misfortune of being personally affected by it, some of them fatally." When a reporter from a self-claimed leftist new organization suggested that that those Okurkans who were affected--most of them among society's elite--should be left to their own means to sort out their situation, the Prime Minister responded confidently that the concern of the government was for all its citizens regardless of economic status, employment, or any other factor.




"The Amsterdonians are a tyranny that will not last," President Vaclav Holub remarked to his company, which consisted of the Prime Minister and a select number of the Board of Directors--three to be precise. His words carried a hopeful sadness, not anger. Even in the light of an unwarranted attack on a civilian leisure vessel, those around him agreed that he was much more of a man to sing poetry of better days ahead than utter brash condemnations. He was certainly upset, but he felt comforted by the course of history always seemed to take in the battle between good and evil. He turned to the prime minister Lenka Gjuricova, the platinum blonde and blue-eyed forty-something woman who had spoken at the press conference earlier.


"Wonderful job, Prime Minister. A situation like this is difficult enough to navigate behind closed doors, let alone with the public asking questions. I think the people will largely be on our side during this crisis." He would always be a gentle old coot, but he noticed confidence and tact was starting to stir in her. He wondered what had changed in her life recently, if anything. Not his concern though. He turned to the three Directors with him: the Director of Military Services, General Karel Sviha, the Director of Peace Affairs, Jiři Hrubín, and the Director of Foreign Affairs, Mikuláš Bacik. The three of them were sharp and dedicated, each in their own way. Sviha, who was towards his sixties, had fought in the civil war, commanding partisan troops that eventually overpowered the regime. It was his presence that guaranteed the early thriving of the Okurkan military, which began filled mostly with patriots who fought under and/or with him. Hrubín was relatively young, not even thirty, and had campaigned for the creation of his position as a private citizen from a philanthropic family. Popular consensus so agreed with his cause that the government created the Director seat and asked him to fill it. Bacik was much more reserved, being about the Prime Minister's age, dark-haired and dark-eyed, and never speaking unless he felt it crucial. When he did speak, he was respectful and calm to a point that made his silence almost eerie. Still, his great handle on dealing with people made him excel at his job.


They were called now to reassess the possibilities of war and peace.


"General Sviha, please lead us off," Holub requested. Sviha nodded.

"No new data has come in from our intelligence experts about whether or not the attack was certainly deliberate or another incident to be chalked up to the fog of war. In regards to our navy, all able ships have been mobilized and are moving to strategic positions along our territory and within international waters. They have been given explicit instructions to fire upon no vessel until fired upon. The precaution of installing incident cameras and black boxes on all ships has guaranteed that in the event of any armed conflict, we will be able to decisively find who takes the first shot. Additionally, the Tulijan military has been alerted of our maneuvers. Within two days, a single defended hospital ship will reach the Archipelago to begin rescue and medical operations."

"Do any of these maneuvers enter waters close to Amsterdonian operations?"

"None are planned to Mr. President, but with submarines, the Amsterdonian navy could be anywhere. Our navy will be operating mostly along trade routes."

"Good, good...I am glad to hear this. Mr. Bacik?" the President asked. Bacik, who seemed to have been staring off to space, realigned his gaze towards the President.

"General regional opinion is suspicious of the attack. Amsterdonian sources claim the liner was mistaken for a warship, but General Sviha will tell you that confusing the two is a mistake that no submarine crew could ever seriously make."

Sviha nodded. Bacik continued.

"So far nobody has taken aggressive action against Amsterdon in the form of sanctions or condemnations. Tulija appears to be sitting still and are cooperative with our present actions. We will be in further discussion over them about whether or not this warrants further action than what has been taken."

"Very good, but like Mr. Hrubín, I would very much like to keep from warring on foreign soil," the President responded.

"Absolutely sir," Hrubín acknowledged. "We should not make revenge a policy on any level of government. My staff and I favor a sit-down with the Amsterdonian ambassador to weigh the situation and advise both governments for preventing future occurrences like this. If the attack was purposeful, my staff agrees that there should be some level of regional pressure against Amsterdon."


Alright, plans were starting to shape up.

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In the capital city of Leider Stad, a gathering is taking place. Journalists and news media representatives from around the region have been invited to witness a public statement from the Federation of Amsterdon's Secretary of Defence. Each individual is under armed guard and has a set of minders assigned to monitor their every move and action. They and their equipment have been carefully examined and checked to ensure no illegal or dangerous material has been brought in to the heavily guarded, high-security building. The location itself was not revealed, and nor was the time in which the press conference was to take place. Each person was blindfolded on the way there, and each person would be blindfolded on the way back. Every possible measure was taken to ensure that nothing would go wrong, the representatives were even forbidden from wearing shoes. The Secretary of Defence was a national champion at dodgeball, and was well schooled in it's 5 rules. But he certainly didn't want to have to use his skills in this situation.


On the stage a large grey podium stands with the seal of Amsterdon emblazoned on it, at the back are 10 Amsterdonian flags standing proudly in a line. Then the Defence secretary enters, saluting the soldiers guarding the door through which he entered. He approaches the podium, and begins:



I, The Amsterdonian Secretary of State for Defence, Timo De Vechten, have brought you here today in order to relay an important message to the region: Amsterdon has been accused of deliberately and intentionally committing a hostile act of aggression against civilians from innocent nations within this region. I am of course referring to the sinking of the cruise liner Atlas Shirked and the catastrophic loss of life which ensued. We deny this claim completely, it is nothing but a malicious and fabricated lie. If nothing else will convince you it should be that any nation with even an ounce of a self-preservationist streak would never commit such an act. Do not undermine or underestimate our intelligence by believing that we would act so naively and recklessly. It is an insult.


The cruise liner was regretfully mistaken as an Otterian battleship, and that is the truth. What would this nation gain by killing civilians from nations whom we are not at war with? It would only harm our nation. Ask yourself who has come out of this affair as the beneficiary, it is not Amsterdon. Look to the nation which launched an invasion of our homeland, an extremist nation hell bent on enforcing and imposing it's twisted world view. It is the aggressor in this situation and we are fighting a defensive war against an invader and conqueror. They are the destabalising threat in this region with it's inflammatory rhetoric and actions. Were it not for them committing an act of war by exploding dozens of their planes above our cities, we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place.


In my closing statement I would again like to reiterate that we strongly deny and condemn the claims that we deliberately sunk the Atlas Shirked. It is a lie intended to gain favour for the real aggressor here: The Aquatic Weasels of the Otter Archipelago.


Thank you for your time.

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Julius Putin was in his personal chamber throwing serrated knives at a spinning device that contained a mosaic of Amsterdonian official headshots. By the time Marcus Yeltsin came into the decadently furnished dungeon that was Putin's bedchamber, some hundreds of feet underground, Julius had already managed to hit nine officials directly in the forehead.


"Julius, the people are happier than ever. They need their First Citizen to grow that happiness into something more than just money and clothes. You must make a speech." Yeltsin gazed at the wheel for a moment before placing a 300-page dossier on a large blackwood table in front of the bed.


"Tell me something, Marcus. How quickly could our fleets land Legionnaires at the gates of that pompous murderer's cities?"


"Amsterdonians technically don't have walled cities, so I'm not sure there'd be a gate to land at, Julius."


Putin sighed and threw the remaining three knives at the board, hitting another two officials' faceshots in the left eye each. "I suppose we should make contact with the Archipelago and make preparations, then."




"One twelfth of our entire population are military-trained Romans. Close to 1.2 million of our population are organized criminals. We're mobilizing the men this week. I want you to secure bribes for the larger syndicates... what are they called?"


"Uh, the largest of them is the Sons of Hades. Second largest is probably the Karamazovs. Why would we negotiate with the armed criminals, Julius?" Marcus was unsure where is life-long friend was going with this plan.


"You're going to pay them in government-sanctioned chests and tell them to cause trouble in Amsterdon. Killing criminals there that we know work for that corrupt and zealous government, busting their sea trade, robbing banks or whatever they wish to do there, really. It's of no consequence to us." Putin smirked before picking up the dossier and looking at the title which read "Delegates and the Questions to Ask."




"Oh, someone sent that over earlier today. They want you to mediate a debate between the Regional Forum delegation candidates."


"Uh... Really? I mean we have a flayed man as our flag and we kind of torture people with prejudice. You'd think they would know better than to just ask us for help." Julius was honestly perplexed that anyone could mistake the Prosperous Romans for a diplomatic people.


"Well, I guess fly out to the Forum Island when all is ready. I have some things to say in public anyway." Julius laid the dossier down and went back to the board to pull off the knives and start again.


"But. Julius? How do you know the Sons of Hades or the Karamazovs will agree to our terms?"


Julius smiled as he said, "because we're paying them each three hundred-thousand Denarii."





"We must keep it unofficial for now. If international waters get wind of our plans then we'll get the whole region breathing down our necks. That's why we used the criminals. And, you must remember Marcus, either way we get to have a Rome free of the Sons and Karamazovs for a while." Julius was pleased with himself once again. His woman would know the feeling of spinning on a wheel for three hours, tonight. But before that would happen, Putin made a call to the administrative offices of the Otter Archipelago. After being on hold for 20 minutes and being forced to listen to The Doobie Brothers while waiting, he finally got through to someone important.

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"Your Highness?", asked Casellia Inventius while tapping King Shaffey's shoulder.


"Hrm...", said Shaffey as he yawned.


"It's time. We're going to announce our public opinion on the war and pick our side. The documents are ready, as you ordered, your Highness.", Casellia announced with a respectful tone, in reality, she didn't like King Shaffey, he thought that he messes everything up. She was even ready to defect to Arkiasis.


"Let's get this started."






user posted image
Official Announcement from the King Shaffey the Great (HSSU)Regarding the Amsterdonian-Otterian War


Growth, Honesty, Sacrifice



A horrible mistake from Amsterdon. A mistake we will not accept.

user posted image
Official War Declaration on Amsterdon


Growth, Honesty, Sacrifice



The state of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey hereby declares war on The Federation of Amsterdon, for the following reasons:


Murder of civilians, declaring war on an otherwise peaceful nation, threatening Shaffeyan peace, and more.


Through this declaration of war we also announce that all Shaffeyan trade with The Federation of Amsterdon will be cut off and Amsterdonian planes may not fly over Shaffeyan airspace. All airlines registered in Amsterdon may not land in Shaffey. Amsterdonian passports will not be accepted to enter Shaffey and will be removed from the visa-exempt list. The Amsterdonian embassy will be closed and all employees deported. Citizens of all nations in the Shaffeyan visa-exempt list that have entered Amsterdon in the last month will be redirected and must receive a visa on arrival.



"We've published it.", said Field Marshall Horho with a smoke hardened voice.


"Good, prep the forces. Get me a high-ranking official from Otter. I need you to close the Hyrmyz strait and the Shaffeyan Gulf, an-", King Shaffey was interrupted.


"Your Highness, do you mean the mines?", asked Horho with a surprised expression.


"Yes, Horho, what else? If you interrupt me, do it for a good reason.", answered King Shaffey angrily.


"Yes, Your Highness, please continue.", said the Minister of Defense while nodding.


"Close the straight, close all borders, get AAs in the Shaffeyan heartland, shoot any Amsterdonian plane that tries to pass through Shaffey down, civilian or not. I want John's corpse in Utsoort. Make it happen, Horho.", said King Shaffey while sighing.


"What about SHIAVAK, Sire?", asked Field Marshall Horho while adjusting his eye-patch.


"Send them in, double their numbers in Amsterdon. Get Shinbe around so Amsterdonian spies are found."


"Yes, Your Highness."


Field Marshall Horho left. He started thinking about his past: He was the one who contacted Dr. Booten Ka and requested that his new insecticide be turned into a weapon that would later be known as 'K9K9'. But, he was given a second chance, unlike Booten Ka, who didn't enjoy the post-K9K9 era much. He wasn't going to betray his King, the man who gave his land so much progress.

Edited by Greenline

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"Declaring war on an otherwise peaceful nation"? It appears you have been wearing your crown too tightly Shaffey, it was the Otters who declared war on US and they were the ones who instigated this war. We see right through your thinly veiled justifications for declaring war. It is nothing but an attempt to gain support in your pathetic bid for regional delegate; just days ago you were knocking at our door begging for our vote. And suddenly you declare war over the accidental deaths of 3 of your citizens, the same citizens you yourself oppressed and murdered only weeks ago. Only when your lust for power persuaded you to run for regional delegate did you begrudgingly reform your ways. And you are now apparently allied with your old arch nemesis, the very nation who you went to war with barely a year ago. How do you expect anyone to take you or your nation seriously King Shaffey?


If it is a war you want, then it is a war you will get. Your nation and it's citizens are now a legitimate target of the Federation of Amsterdon.




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El Zilcho

"Will this abysmal headache ever cease?" Charles Scifo was sat, rubbing his temples slightly. Through the window of Foreign Minister Kaylor's office, a setting sun could be made out behind the Heisenberg Towers. Far below, traffic thinned as rush hour waned into the evening; overhead, plane lights flickered above the smog of metropolitan Concordánce.


"It is clear our region stands on a precipice of prosperity and destruction." Arthur Kaylor was the archetypal Tulijan minister - measured, charismatic, eloquent. His time in government had seen him as Business Minister, Minister of Justice and for a long time now, Foreign Minister. His words, just spoken, seemed to echo around his office as the cold twilight outside clashed with the ambient lighting.


"Indeed it is. We're holding all we can together, but their belligerence has just complicated everything." Scifo was steady but in turmoil. Having been initially charged with compiling a report on the proceedings of the Otterian political movements, he was dragged into the team assigned to observe and advise upon the Otterian - Amsterdonian war. He had recommended maintaining equilibrium by allowing the duel between Otter and Amsterdon to be resolved. He couldn't, in all conscience, drag the region into a devastating war. It would end in bloody silence.


"Shaffey is undoubtedly a loose cannon. A loose cannon that is careening wildly into the midst of a china shop, followed by several bulls." Kaylor mused "I'm fairly certain their foreign policy is a weak attempt at showing themselves as the regions moral standard. I'd hate to admit it, but Amsterdon's communique hits the nail on the head - Shaffey are threatening everything in a feeble attempt to make up for their reputational deficit."


"But we simply can't account for their volatility. How can we make plans when they're bouncing off the walls? They'll be the end of everyone." Scifo responded.


"I can't advocate Otter's assault, I most definitely can't advocate Amsterdon's regime. Likewise, I cannot speak for the War Office or the Directorate's inner dealings with either. But I can most definitely speak against the pariah that is Shaffey. I can't allow them to jeopardise the peace - this is a matter for the Archipelago and Amsterdon to deal with."


"But what of Atlas Shirked?" The disaster was still prevalent across Tulijan media. Conservative outlets called for war against Amsterdon, liberal media calling for condemnation. Although the event had been officially denounced by Hugh Daxley the previous Wednesday, many felt it wasn't far enough. As usual, the Progressives were coming under fire from some courts for not flying headlong into international affairs, as had been so common under Armstrong-Miller's Republican Coalition.


"A totally tragic endeavour. But a nonsensical one too; I cannot buy that Amsterdon would target such an internationally represented ship deliberately. It's most certainly no cause for Shaffey's insistence on adding faeces to the fan," Kaylor paused, looking for a brief interim at the Tulijan Seal that hung grandiosely above the oaken door "for once, their press release appears genuine."


"Choosing between Shaffey and Amsterdon is unquestionably painful." Scifo was again, bewildered.


"I don't intend to choose either. But at the very least Amsterdon's insanity is stable, and likely to be pegged back by war they are raging. Shaffey, unadulterated and on a coalition side, could irrevocably damage the situation. Intervention may be our only choice." Kaylor's Liberal allegiance flew directly into the face of his latter statement. Scifo looked at the Minister with astonishment, obscuring the majority of his surprise but still reeling (figuratively).


"You don't mean-"


"A very firm word first. I won't stand by while lines are drawn and blood measured out so callously. I won't wait for Shaffey to swing its weight about like a bandwagon jumping infant. Aggressive action will not be tolerated." Kaylor looked strongly at Scifo. He then reached forward to his desk intercom.


"Amanda, get me the Ministry of Defence and the War Office. I want H and W on the line, we need to talk strategy." Kaylor sat back slowly, exhaling deeply. On the skyline of Concordánce, the last vestiges of sun bled away. Over Shaffey, the sun was rising. And in Amsterdon, another night of shock and awe had just begun...




From the Desk of Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs - Arthur Kaylor

Despite internal and external pressure, the war between Otter Archipelago and Amsterdon has been allowed to run its course. It is, invariably, a matter of sovereign grievances. As such we have maintained neutrality, an important step to allow the settling of differences and later peace. Threat of further involvement by nations, brought about due to the deplorable sinking of Atlas Shirked have been duly noted. But the actual act of assault, and further destruction indubitably to come with it, fall at the feet of Shaffey. Adversarial and inexplicable in nature, we see this jingoism for the act that it is - a superfluous and vacuous motion to aggravate the conflict in order to fulfil Shaffey's needs. Otterian and Amsterdonian forces are, while at war, cleared to engage each other. Whether or not that includes permeating the Pathfinder Strait is not Shaffey nor our right to mediate. In doing so, you're deliberately stirring a pot that is already spitting with boiling fury.


We demand Shaffey desists from this course of action, or risk sanctions. It's record is blotched - whether or not King Shaffey truly wishes to correct this moral deficiency, in front of the entire region, and cleanse his name, lies in his response. Proceeding with war may be his political epitaph...

Edited by El Zilcho

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user posted image


Constitution of 2012



Constitution of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey


Article 1 Name of the Nation


The name of the nation this constitution applies to shall be The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey, it’s overseas territories and conquered lands in the future, hereinafter referred to as ‘Shaffey’ or per demonym, ‘Shaffeyan’.


Article 2 Goals of this Constitution


The aims of this constitution shall be: To improve the rights of the Shaffeyan people, to decrease political apathy in Shaffey, to increase equality between the Royal Family of Shaffey, the government and the people of Shaffey, to give the Shaffeyan people political power through elections and polls, founding of parties to drive the nation into a specific direction chosen by the majority of the people, to modernize the government of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey, etc.


Article 3 This Constitution Applies to:


3.1 All citizens of Shaffey, the Ministers of the Shaffeyan government and the newly formed Parliament [see Article 4].


3.2 This constitution will be the last law to be passed by King Shaffey the Great (HSSU), meaning that, this constitution will not be subject to election.


Article 4 The Parliament


4.1 The Parliament shall conduct the business of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey.


4.2 The Parliament of Shaffey will be elected every 3 [Three] years by the people of Shaffey, the Ministers and King Shaffey the Great, all having an equal vote of 1 [One].


4.3 The committee shall consist of the following members: the Chief Speaker; the Vice Speaker; the representatives of all 14 regions, each elected by the citizens of their regions; the Secretary; the Public Relations Advisor; the War Advisor; the Economic Advisor; the Civil Rights Advisor; the Political Rights Advisor; the Advisor to all affairs related to the World Assembly; [Note: All ministers have 1 [One] ‘Advisor’, they advise the Ministers who in turn advise the King (HSSU); All members of the Parliament shall be required to be Citizens of Shaffey.


4.4 Chief Speaker

The Chief Speaker shall have overall responsibility for the affairs of the Parliament. The Chief Speaker will be the main representative of the Parliament. The Parliament meetings are opened and closed by the Chief Speaker and can be extended or decreased by the CS.


4.5 Vice Speaker

The Vise Speaker shall assume the duties of the Chief Speaker in special circumstances such as; disease, death, imprisonment due to illegal activities etc., the VS will also be the main advisor of the CS.


4.6 The Economic Advisor

The Economic Advisor will advise the Minister of Economy (chosen by King Shaffey the Great (HSSU)).


4.7 The Foreign Affairs Advisor

The FAA will be the main advisor the the Minister of Foreign Affairs -“-


4.8 The Annal Manager

The AM will keep a record of the Parliament from the first day of each year to the last day, which will be archived after inspection by all Ministers and King Shaffey the Great (HSSU).


4.9 The Civil Rights Advisor

The CRA will be the advisor of the Minister of Civil Rights.


4.10 Representatives of Each Party

Conservative Progressive, Conservative Static, Central, Liberal Abadi, Liberal Current shall each have 10 [Ten] representatives in the Parliament. (Total 50 [Fifty] Party Representatives)


[The positions mentioned are not all positions in the parliament, the term ‘Advisor’ denotes an advisor to a minister, each ministers has an advisor]


4.10 Parliament Meetings


4.10.1 The Parliament of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey will be held every month


4.10.2 The quorum for a meeting of the Parliament shall be 80% [Eighty Percent] of Parliament representatives.



4.11 Term of Office of the Parliament

The Parliament shall hold office from the 1st day of January subsequent to their election until the 1st day of January 3 years after their election. Representatives of the Parliament can be elected 4 times.


Article 5 General Meetings


5.1 Extraordinary General Meetings


5.1.1 An Extraordinary General Meeting of the Parliament may be convened in case of war or any other emergency in the region or The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey.



5.1.2. An Extraordinary General Meeting shall be convened:

(i) By majority decision of the Parliament; or

(ii) By decision of King Shaffey the Great (HSSU)


5.1.3 No less than 7 [seven] days notice of an Extraordinary General Meeting shall be given. The date and time of the EGM shall be notified to the citizens of Shaffey and advertised by public notice within the Eternal Kingdom.


Article 6 Election of the Committee


6.1 The Parliament of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey shall be elected every 3 years on the 1st day of January


6.2 The Chief Speaker shall act as returning officer for the elections. Where the Chief Speaker intends to be a candidate in any election, a returning officer, who is not a candidate in any election, shall be appointed by the Parliament.


6.3 All members of each party (Conservative Progressive, Conservative Static, Central, Liberal Abadi, Liberal Current) shall be eligible for election to the Parliament.


6.4 Candidates for each position on the Parliament of The Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey must be proposed and seconded by the members and leaders of their respective party.


6.5 All citizens of the Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey, in Shaffey or not, (excluding those held captive) shall be entitled to vote in the election of the committee.


6.6 The election of members of the Parliament shall take place by secret ballot at the 3 year election. Where the votes obtained by any candidate exceed the votes obtained by any other candidate for that position, that candidate shall be deemed elected to that position.


Article 7 Resignations from the Committee


7.1 The resignation of any member of the Parliament shall be instituted by a letter of resignation to the Annal Manager. In the case of the resignation of the Annal Manager, resignation may be instituted by a letter of resignation to the Chief Speaker.



Article 8 Amendments to the Constitution


8.1 Amendments to this constitution may only be made by King Shaffey the Great.


8.2 Such amendments to this constitution as may be approved by the people of Shaffey.


All hail King Shaffey the Great, of Utsoort II, protector of Shaffey!


May this constitution be guarded by his Royal Hand!


This constitution is hereby declared VALID,


King Shaffey the Great (HSSU)

Edited by Greenline

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We applaud the efforts of King Shaffey in the name of freedom and are proud to have played an (albeit small) role in this recent turn of events. We hope to find new allies among the proud citizens of a nation taking broad steps in the right direction, and therefore we take great pride in once again endorsing Shaffey on the world stage.


Justice Pridegood,


Otter Archipelago



OOC: Apologies for leaving the exciting turn of recent events up in the air lately - I've been really busy with work. However, quick thanks to GTA_Stu for playing along with the war story. A quick reminder for everyone interested: Otterian forces are skirmishing around the borders of Amsterdon but the majority of their forces remain at home and in key defensive positions. John's body double has been abducted by Otterian forces. The Archipelago can't be sure of his identity, despite messages claiming he is still in control of Amsterdon. We also have a couple other high profile captives.

The wreck of the Atlas Shirked is resting on the bottom of the straight, and we welcome an outside investigation into the circumstances regarding its untimely demise.



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To emulate a bit of recent news...



President Assaulted With Squirt Gun


While walking through a crowd of supporters in the small city of Ocel Kladivo, President Vaclav Holub was hit several times in the arm by a man wielding a toy water gun. The President appeared confused by the action, later remarking that he would have thought it more of a joke if his assailant had not seemed so serious.


The man, who refused to identify himself but gladly talked to reporters before turning himself in to the police, defined himself as a strong nationalist and said his actions were symbolic of his distaste for the rising influx of foreigners, who come to Okurka mostly for its excellent tourism industry.


"These foreigners who come in are changing our life, our culture, and our politics," the man said before being sat in a police vehicle uncuffed. "Our country is no longer our own; it belongs to outsiders modeling Okurka into their favorite little hideaway. We should be cautious of this. I think if a loyal Okurkan like me can walk up to the President and soak him, there is little stopping foreigners from using real guns to kill our politicians and instate their own."


In an interview after the event, the President appeared to heed the young man's concerns, but did not justify what many would call xenophobia. "Any country with welcoming borders as ours must be wary of the possibility external influence. However, we as Okurkans have always been our own people, and I intend that our government will always do what is best for its citizens. The moment another nation tries to subjugate our people, directly or through subversion, swift and correcting action will be taken. I appreciate this man's sentiments, but I wish he would have found a better way to bring them to our attention than get my sleeve wet."


While most Okurkans are decrying the event as xenophobic and violent protest, many more on the Internet and in the streets regard the happening as a humorous example of Okurkans being rated as some of the nicest citizens in the world.


"Not only is it funny how relaxed the President and his security were about the gunman," said one bystander, "It is even funnier that the weapon of choice was a child's toy. I suppose even the worst of us prefer make our biggest statements with dart guns and super soakers."

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Cmon fellas... sad.gif

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Message from Amsterdonian Embassy in Utsoort





**Distorted Voice** The Amsterdonian Embassy in Utsoort has been attacked by us, the people of Shaffey, all 150 embassy workers are now declared as Prisoners of War. The ambassador will be submitted to torture if necessary, we require Amsterdon take necessary steps to return them to Amsterdon. The embassy has been confirmed as an illegal spying nest. We have hereby drafted these conditions:


•Amsterdon will pay 1,000,000,000 Trials as compensation for spying on Shaffeyan Soil.


•Amsterdon will pay 1,000 Trials for each embassy worker and 100,000 Trials for the Amsterdonian ambassador to be returned to Amsterdon with Air Shaffey (950 Trials per person for Utsoort-Leider Stad flight) (airfare and transportation payed for by Amsterdon), with a sum of 1,000,393,450 Trials for Ransom, Transportation and Compensation fees.


•The families of the Amsterdonian embassy workers are free to leave Utsoort, they are not under our control.





You're watching SPN, Shaffey's #1 source for all things related to politics, with me Jrugr Farood, as always, bringing you quality conservative news from conservative sources.


The student group "Leider Stad or Bust" has attacked the Amsterdonian embassy today and is now holding all 150 embassy workers and the ambassador hostage. An hour after climbing the walls of the embassy while burning Amsterdonian flags and chanting "Down with Amsterdon"; Leider Stad or Bust sent an Audio File to the GTA Forums region and publicized their conditions for the release of the hostages.


The Shaffeyan Police Force and the Diplomatic Police have both sided with LSoB and have claimed that the move is completely legal, and supported by the Shaffeyan Government.


We are still awaiting an official Amsterdonian reply on the issue.

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El Zilcho


Daniel Whitelocke Ascends as Executive Minister

'New Direction' as Senate and Consular Houses pledge support

Independent Daniel Whitelocke has surged to success in the First Ministerial Election this Thursday the 15th, beating other Meritocratically approved candidates George Miller (Conservatively leaning), Michael Dal Bianco (Progressive) and Martha Richards (Independent). Whitelocke has pledged to fully utilise the efficient Technocratic Directorate before him, with such heavyweights of the Nation States world as Aruthr Kaylor and Vermillion on board. Whitelocke's liberal leaning policy and eloquent rhetoric have won over the Liberals in the Consular House; and with the Progressives looking on side with the Liberals in Legislative coalition, the new Executive Minister's tenure looks to have the support of a majority in the Consular House; something Daxley's more Conservative second term policy denied him, as he haemorrhaged support to the Republicans and Liberals.


Michael Dal Bianco has been sworn in by the Popular Commission and Electoral College as Deputy to Whitelocke, operating as the opposition's Second Minister. His loss to Whitelocke was conclusive (a 45% plurality of first preference votes going Whitelocke's way, and a 66% majority by the second round). However, the general consensus between the Progressives for a need of new direction has meant that previous incidents of conflict between the two top ministers looks to be avoided, as Dal Bianco and Whitelocke are agreed on how to progress. A repeal of the Securities and Policing Act (2011) and Senatorial Reform Act (2012) is intended to rescind some of Daxley's imprudent and populist policies, ensuring an increase in political freedoms and civil liberties once more. Whitelocke's pledge for a "independently operated Education system, free of political interference" has also been met with wide acclaim.


In the Senate, elections in October provided Crossbench Independent peers significant freedom, as they gained the support of Republican and Liberal elected peers, who finally broke the deadlock caused by Tradition and TNP appointees. The continuous clashes with the elected Tradition candidates finally subsided after their landslide defeats across Tulija, opening up the Senate as well as the Consular House to a working majority. Whitelocke's pledge to further drive down crime, reform education and reform the tax system are receiving general applause - his first 100 days already looking to be fast paced and fresh.

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Is Tulija Destroying our Region?


This is a question most member states of the region must ask themselves, and possibly have already asked themselves at some point, but were either not brave enough, or did not find it to be important enough to mention.


Let us look at the important events during Tulija's term as delegate and Tulija's involvement in each:


• K9K9 Catastrophe: Tulija attempted to keep their role in the disaster to a minimum. As an act of propaganda and to show the region their hands-on approach to leading the region, Tulija donated a small amount of money to the Shaffeyan government.


• Otter-Amsterdon Conflict: Tulija attempted to keep the region-wide debate heated on the wrongdoings of Amsterdon and away from Tulija's own mistakes (negligence), which lead up to this easily preventable war.


• The inactivity issue: Almost 2/3rd of all nations in our region have ceased to exist due to Tulija's unwillingness to bring regional issues to the leaders of the region, and keeping the region active by leading the region is a way a delegate should: by involving all of the region's members, not just keeping his power to himself.


We have all seen Tulija's responses to these claims, they always attempt to change the subject from the Tulijan government's own inability to lead to Shaffey's role as a regional pariah. To prove that Shaffey no longer has any plans to become delegate, King Shaffey the Great has announced on the 24th of January, 2013 that Shaffey has left the WA until further notice.


We see 2 solutions to the region's current problems:


1. Tulija must change the way they operate to a more region oriented model.


2. Tulija must be replaced by a new, more competent delegate.


The only way to reach these goals is by not fearing to speak up against Tulija, many nations have respect for Tulija and its leaders, we say to these nations: "True respect and fraternity can only be expressed through constructive criticism".





The following is a transcript of the 15th Seating of the Shaffeyan Parliament




Head Speaker: By the Grace of our Lord, King Shaffey the Great, we are able to meet here in Utsoort, on the 24th of January, 2013. Please stand for the National Anthem of the Eternal Kingdom of Shaffey.


*National Anthem Plays*


Head Speaker: Thank you, you may now be seated.


Head Speaker: The "Resignation from the World Assembly Act" was put up for vote by King Shaffey the Great on January 23rd, 2013. The unanimous result is in favor of resigning from the World Assembly.





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