72 Hour Rush

[Dr-Mayhem111]

 

72 Hour

Rush

 

This story is about a retired Mob Hitman who is trying to start a new life in San Andreas but he ends up back to Liberty City to save his one and only child, Melody. The characters name is Anthony Aligieri. Born November 3 1963 in Vice City, joined the Vercetti Family in 1986 as a Hitman. Ever since he joined, it has been hell for Anthony, now Vercetti is after him, but he is not giving up without a fight. I have listed the first 5 Chapters below.

 

Chapter 1: Still going at it

Chapter 2: 5 Years later

Chapter 3: One Good Day

Chapter 4: One Bad Day

Chapter 5: 72 Hours starts now

 

\Hope you enjoy what I have so far.

Edited December 13, 2011 by Dr-Mayhem111

[Dr-Mayhem111]

 

Here is an idea of the story

It was 10:30 pm, I was waiting for the Tommy to make the call for the next target. Finally the phone rings but its not Tommy, its Mike Cappallo. He was an enforcer for the Leone Family but then he turned states. He tells me quite frightened through the phone, "I'm shiiting myself here Tony, I think Tommy is after me." then I replied "What makes you say that?" he says "I have been seeing his rent-a-goombah bastards following me and stakeout my house. I'm losing it man." I managed to get him to shut up and hang up the phone. The phone rings once again 2 minutes after the previous phone call, I pick up the phone thinking it was Mike, but no it was Tommy. "Tony, good job with McGrath." Tommy says "He was, he almost killed me Tommy." I said "But what doesn't kills us makes us stronger, right?" Tommy says I replied back to him with such anger "f*ck YOU TOMMY, I want to speak with my daughter?" Tommy replies "You will, if you beat the 72 hours. Next target Mike Cappallo"

[Dr-Mayhem111]

 

 

Introduction

 

Ever did something you knew you were going to regret sometime in the future? I know I did. At first it didn’t bother me, but now I see all the damage I’ve done to myself, my family and others. I was a mob hitman for a Vice City criminal syndicate called The Vercetti Family. I know what people think when I say this, why join them if you knew you were going to regret it? Well I’ll tell you, but first, lets start at the beginning where it all started. My name is Antonio Aligieri.

 

I was born April 13 1960 in Liberty City. My mother was a great strong woman who had everything she ever wanted, a big house in Algonquin, great kids, and a loyal husband. My father, Sergio Aligieri was a Capo for the Ancelotti Family, he was well known all over Liberty City and because of his fame, everybody knew me and my brother Vinny. It was all perfect for us, nobody would move on old man Ancelotti because he was feared all over the city. So my dad didn’t have to worry about getting whacked, until something really drastic occurred, it was October 10 1971 I was 11 years old, I was with my dad at the Ancelotti Estate, where they talked about wiping out the entire Forelli Family because their soldier Tommy Vercetti got pinched for 20 years so they took this as an opportunity to really control Liberty City. They were ready for a war, but the Forelli’ s had something else in mind, they aimed where it hurt the Ancelotti’s the most, go after their Capo. Exactly 2 hours after the meeting., me and my father were heading home but we stopped at Drusellas for some pizza, we stayed for a while eating and having a good time, until I saw two cars filled with men in black suits rushing in with guns, 2 seconds all you heard was a massive series of gunshots going off in the restaurant. I was in the bathroom when this happened, I walked out in fear and see 4 dead bodies and among them was my father. I was filled with sadness…….and anger.

 

I didn't know what to do, but I knew I had to do something. I found my dads gun, a colt1911, I picked it up and went after one the Forelli assassins, he was injured but I didn't care, he turned into a alleyway near the restaurant and I came up behind him. I used all my anger as an excuse to pull the trigger, the fact that I was 11 years old with no experience with a gun I was nervous. He turned around and saw that I was pointing a gun at him, he quickly pulled out his gun and right there I was so nervous, my finger just pulled the trigger, shooting the man in the neck causing him to die instantly. The reat of the Ancelotti family arrived moments after all this happened, they were looking for me and found me in an alleyway standing near a dead body holding a gun. Right at that moment The boss saw that I was ready to be in the family, but because I was to young I had to wait until I was old enough. Years have past and I never joined the Ancelottis, so I just ran from Liberty City at the age of 26 and moved to Vice City with an pregnant girlfriend of two months. We had no money, no job, no way of raising this child. So I did what I had to do, turn to life of crime to get some money, it was alright but we have alot of money, just enough to survive. I soon noticed that Tommy Vercetti was out and took over the entire Vice City in a matter of weeks, after I saw a few of his men cruising down the Ocean Beach boulevard in expensive cars, expensive clothes and gold watches I was convince and soon tried to join them. I set up a meeting to meet Tommy, and he soon welcomed me into the family. It was great, I had alot of money, houses everywhere, a reputation, and all I did was kill some people. It was great but I knew sometime in the future, I was going to regret doing this.

 

 

Chapter 1 coming soon

 

[Dr-Mayhem111]

 

Chapter 1:

Still going at it

 

I have been working for Vercetti for almost twenty years and i'm still going at it. I was just doing what I do best and thats being a mob hitman. All these years and now I see my families reactions, they looked ashamed of me knowing that I killed people and still do, it made my wife leave me and she took Melody with her. Knowing that I didn't have anything now, I still kept on going. Sometimes I would think, what would happen if I didn't kill this guy or that guy or whoever I killed, but then again how could I think what would happen if they were still alive if they were already dead. Sometimes life can be difficult, especially when you're a mob hitman, it seems empty and quite lonely, but we know how to deal with them.

 

While I was doing contracts foe Vercetti, I was also planning my retirement, but in order to officially retire I need alot of money stashed somewhere outside of the city. So for now i'm still doing contracts, i'm just hoping that my retirement comes up as soon as possible. I have been asking Tommy for big contracts that are worth alot of money, such as politicians, mob bosses, drug kingpins etc.., he agreed and got me started on my first contract. The first contract was Edgar Colon, a columbian drug kingpin operating in Vice City, he was suppose to attend a meeting with all other drug kingpins including Tommy. I was suppose to cut him off before he reached the meeting, Edgar decided to head to a hotel to visit one of his ladies before the meeting started. I walk in the hotel and ask the guy at the counter where Edgar room was, he soon gave it to me. As I make my way towards his room, I could hear him and the girl all the way from the lobby, finally I made it to his room with the door open and with a "Do not disturb" sign on the doorknob, I laughed a little bit and continued on, he stopped and went to the bathroom to change, I waited patiently behind the bathroom door. Finally he comes out and I pull a Glock 17 with suppressor to his head and pulled the trigger. As I watched his body fall and his brains splatter I was getting sick to my stomach for a sec, but how for the first time in my career with Tommy I felt sick to my stomach after doing a contract, maybe i'm getting soft.

 

I swiftly ran out the hotel and went to my house on Starfish Island and laid down. In my mind i'm thinking about my family, my beautiful wife, my daughter, my mother, and my father. I was imagining all of us on one table have a nice christmas dinner as a family, laughing, having a good time, and being happy, but that chance is gone now. I was tired just by laying down on my queen size bed and fell asleep. I was rudely awaken by the phone, I picked up and it was Tommy telling me that he's at war with the CDO The Columbian Drug Operation, the most dangerous organization in the east coast, Tommy was putting the blame on me telling me I started the war. I couldn't take this nonsense anymore so I hung up. Then i'm noticing that my alarm went off all of a sudden, so I rapidly got my custom M16 with extended mag and grenade launcher and went downstairs and I see over twenty men at my front door trying to break in with heavy weapons. I didn't waste any time, I just aimed the grenade laucher towards the door and pulled the trigger causing a minor explosion killing about three of them and injuring four, then it quickly started a massive shoot out using only automatics. I was shooting and overheard one of the assassins speaking spanish, I couldn't really confirm that they were Columbians all I knew was that they were going to die for not only breaking in to kill me but for stepping on my wife's plants. After a quick ten minutes of shooting and killing everybody, I went straight to Tommy and told him what happened, he was still blaming me for starting the war, so I had no choice but to get out of Vice City as soon as possible. I got all my money, a total of over five million dollars, I packed all my clothes and bought the next flight out of Vice City. I soon landed in Las Ventura, San Andreas. Hopefully I can start a new life here.

Edited January 11, 2012 by Dr-Mayhem111

[KilnerLUFC]

I had a quick read through of the first chapter/introduction, and one thing in particular is stopping me from wanting to carry on; this being your use of commas when you should be using periods. At times, we see a whole ton of action go on, yet in writing, it's only one sentence long. The best way to emphasize action within a story is to use periods.

 

Personally, for me, the story didn't grab me. Maybe it gets different as it progresses, but already I felt like I was reading yet another cheesy 'gangster' story.