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CDC Warns Of The Zombie Apocalypse


sofa_king
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f*ck it, I barely leave the house as it is, unless on a beer or food run, so I'll stock up and sit on gtaf, waiting for images of peoples dead relatives to appear, and the zombie mod's to start banning anyone with a soul.

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Guys I don't think that if this WERE to happen, it'd be the way you'd think it's gonna be. I don't think it'd be with zombies eating people, it seems so unreal and stupid (to me.).

Since zombies do not think, they let instinct take over and based on a cellular level the main instinct is reproduction, so zombies would go around humping everyone.

Now THAT'S what I call a movie icon14.gif




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fireguy109

They don't actually tell you to kill zombies/fight back though, they just want you to hide in a corner until it's over.

pkmTc.gif

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They don't actually tell you to kill zombies/fight back though, they just want you to hide in a corner until it's over.

Because that might be a bit far for a joke, could that be why?

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Also, how can zombies eat people if they don't have a working digestive system?




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Also, how can zombies eat people if they don't have a working digestive system?

They don't need nutrition, they don't need to digest.

 

 

All they wanna do it eat yo' brainses.

 

 

They only need teeth for that.

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Thank goodness I live in the states and can just await CDC instruction after their investigation.

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grandtheftautovideogamer
Also, how can zombies eat people if they don't have a working digestive system?

They don't need nutrition, they don't need to digest.

 

 

All they wanna do it eat yo' brainses.

 

 

They only need teeth for that.

That's a good point.

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Yeah but then what, they'll just keep on eating 'till they explode and die?




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Yeah but then what, they'll just keep on eating 'till they explode and die?

I never thought about that while watching zombie movies. But I guess... yeah.

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I doubt it.

Call me sick but I wonder if zombies crap.




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I stocked up on bacon this week bitches, $1.90 a pound means lots of cheap bacon. I'm buying in major bacon bulk bitches. Move the bacon to the country, bacon all day. Zombies don't like bacon. BUT WE DO!!!! Zombies can't f*cking beat 150 pounds of bacon and 600 rounds of sks ammo to protect the bacon.

eF7McnF.png

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What?

She is trying to protect her beautiful and delicious bacon, since bacon is the wonder food.

Me on the other hand welcome our new zombie overlords, since it is obvious sign that this is do to the rapture that is coming on May 21st.

DVf9mQs.png

Formerly known as The General

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darthYENIK
I doubt it.

Call me sick but I wonder if zombies crap.

It's got to happen. With all that raw meat they eat, they've got to be pissing out of their asses. It's probably just like a horse. You know they're just walking down the street, and it happens, and they just don't give a sh*t (no pun intended).

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AlexGTAGamer

If a zombie apocalypse does happen remember to use this line, "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou [insert weapon here] is with me."

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Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou my Desert Eagle is with me.

First gun that came to my mind.

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Yeah but then what, they'll just keep on eating 'till they explode and die?

Fu*k no, do you really think a rotten stomach is going to hold much, if it's even there at all?

 

The flesh and whatnot would likely leak out of the body as more is ingested.

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They'd be moisty and stuff.

All of you guys say you'd fight back or whatever, I bet half of you would run away and hide the seconds you saw one.

I know deep down inside I would tounge.gif




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They'd be moisty and stuff.

All of you guys say you'd fight back or whatever, I bet half of you would run away and hide the seconds you saw one.

I know deep down inside I would tounge.gif

If I had a gun, no.

 

I don't.

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All of you guys say you'd fight back or whatever, I bet half of you would run away and hide the seconds you saw one.

I know deep down inside I would tounge.gif

Just because you would does not mean half of people here would run and hide. sigh.gif

DVf9mQs.png

Formerly known as The General

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Well if you have no weapon...

anyways, yeah ok I guess you have a point. Sorry about that.




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That article lost all credibility with this line:

 

 

ot because we're hard to kill (well, with the exception of Steven Seagal). We're not;

Puhlease... The zombies could kill Seagal easily... its Chuck Norris that they have to stay away from... tounge.gif

 

And i thought for sure the CDC would deny such a thing ever possibly existing at least until it actually does happen...

 

But still more reason to build an armory and a giant shelter filled with food and ready to deploy reusable booby traps.

 

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I stocked up on bacon this week bitches, $1.90 a pound means lots of cheap bacon. I'm buying in major bacon bulk bitches. Move the bacon to the country, bacon all day. Zombies don't like bacon. BUT WE DO!!!! Zombies can't f*cking beat 150 pounds of bacon and 600 rounds of sks ammo to protect the bacon.

Cheap bacon is great and all, but it's cheap for a reason. It's heavily processed, which breaks down the protein structure, which in turn makes it cut-rate. I think if you splurge and purchase some top quality sausage and ham, you'll be set. The sausage will add a nice layer of springiness to the equation while the ham will provide a strong, yet delicate defense shield against attacks.

7FTgFLB.png

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GTA3Freak-2001

I gather this is just a way to get people people who are into the whole zombie pop culture thing to think about general emergency and disaster preparedness whether that be the unlikely event of zombie apocalypse or more likely cyclone/hurricane/earthquake/tornado etc. I am not saying those into Zombie movies are the young and unprepared who need this advice but you know what I mean.

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Machiavelli's Prophecy

 

All of you guys say you'd fight back or whatever, I bet half of you would run away and hide the seconds you saw one.

I know deep down inside I would tounge.gif

Just because you would does not mean half of people here would run and hide. sigh.gif

I would. I mean f*ck, imagine a group of hungry zombies chasing you trying to eat you, would you run towards them and hug them or something? f*ck that, my main focus would be getting the hell outta there.

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Well f*ck me sideways, some of you guys actually believe in this or at least list it as a possible thing to happen? Like, the f*ck?

 

Nah, just playin'. I got my zombie shelter built.

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