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How to Make a Truly sh*tty Topic


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I know what you're thinking as you sit there, cursor poised over the new topic button. "How can I make a truly awful topic? One that not only makes me look like a dribbling idiot, but also one that infuriates the rest of the community?" Well, fear not. Here is a comprehensive guide to making sh*tty topics -- one that, strangely enough, has had a lot more effort put into it than any awful topic you'll ever have to make. I'll guide you through different approaches which will leave your audience scratching its head in confusion, tearing its hair out, or banging its head furiously into a wall.


The first approach: asking a completely pointless question, which encourages no discussion whatsoever.


...When people say "SEE!?!" when they are trying to get a point across. SEE??!?!

It's a stroke of genius, really. Look at the clever way in which the topic starter reinforced his point by performing the very action he chose to ridicule! Annoyance scale: 4/5


(Also see: this)


The second approach: reposting an email forward which actually began life as a joke sheet which began to make the rounds of offices shortly after the invention of the printing press.

You'd be pissed off if your grandmother sent this to you. Draw ire by reposting it on a public forum. Annoyance level: 3.5/5


The third approach: a half-baked idea which isn't supported by evidence, information or links, causing the reader to not know what the f*ck you're on about.


So basically I didn't knew about it, until few days ago when I saw a video on YouTube at random. I've searched on Bohemian but it seems like they do not give those secrets that are merged with this Bohemian Grove. I know this is a place where world's most powerful leaders are making pagan rituals and sacrifice kids and such to Devil's mercy. Is this true? This information is pretty old, was filmed by a guy in 1989. Is it still active?

Always assume your reader knows everything about everything. That way, you don't have to put any effort into your initial post, and can go back to flogging your microscopic penis while watching reruns of Thundercats. Annoyance level: 3.5/5


The fourth approach: ???


Hey i would like to know your toughts on what are the best and the worst hairstyles

i will post later since i don't have time

Imagine your best friend calls you up one day. He says, "Man, I have something I need to tell you... but I don't have time. Call you in a day or so. You'd be pissed off, right? You'd think, "If he really had something to say, why didn't he call when he had time to tell me... And why did he call just to tell me he didn't have time to call?" Because of the sheer confusion this approach generates, it scores a perfect 5/5 on the annoyance scale.


These are just a handful of the ways in which you can piss people off over the internet. Granted, you will make yourself look like a paper-eating glue-sniffer in the process, but it'll be worth it in the end.




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GrandMaster Smith

'Hey lets make a sh*tty topic that bitches about other sh*tty topics'



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