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If you were in a real life Zombie apocalypse...


Tha Lunatic 510

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Tha Lunatic 510

you wake up on a Saturday morning.. play your favorite video game for a few hours.. then you decided to watch a little TV after.. every single channel on your satellite dish (or cable box) is blank.. you look outside and notice there's not kids out playing, no cars driving by.. it's quiet.. you pick up the phone to call a friend but it's dead, no dial tone.. so you decide to take a walk over to his house.. there you see a mailman.. he seems to have dropped his mail and is on his knees struggling to pick it all up.. you decide to go over to help him and possibly ask a few questions as to why it's so empty outside.. as you get closer, you see blood on the ground, he's moaning, he seems to be in serious pain.. you rush over faster to help.. but then you observe he's eating a squirrel.. he turns to you, eyes completely dilated and gray and lunges at you.. you back up and bump into your neighbor.. a woman who's completely nude and seems to be bitten in the neck, very bloody.. eyes also dilated and gray.. it then hits you.. you're in the middle of a zombie apocalypse taking effect..

 

 

what do you do from there?

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This topic sounds familiar... if my calcumalations are correct then I predict tales of "gather up the old gang to kick some ass" fantasies.

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Harwood Butch3r

Grab a baseball bat, and start cracking some zombie skulls. Sometimes I even wonder myself when I go out the front of my house at night to let my dog do a piss what I would do if I saw a heap of zombies slowly coming up the street.

 

I think I watch way too many Romero zombie flicks. lol

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RobsEpicFret

get a melee weapon,the 50 kunais in my closet and the hand gun in my neighbors attic then head to a gun store after i get supplies i would car jack a car.....wait i`m 15........ i,ll get my bicycle and then get the hell outta there and go to the nearest town and see if they were affected and then if i see pretty much i'm 1 of the only ones alive then i'll get to a safe place and from that day i guess i'll have to steal food,ammo, every week and go on with my life then maybe try to figure out what the hell is going on

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Wait for it....wait for it...

 

 

Oh what the hell, I guess I'll do it.

 

My plan is we'll stop by lizzie's pick her up, go by mum's, kill dad and then stop at the winchester and wait till it all blows over.

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In all seriousness I would run home and grab my dads double barrel shotgun! I would also grab the .22 rifle and the .22 pistol. Grab as many supplies as I can move it up into the attic, close all the doors, barricade the windows and then get into the attic. Now I hide....

 

Oh btw, I read the Zombie survival guide, I know what I am talking about. cool.gif

 

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Tha Lunatic 510
Suicide time bitches

LMFAO! you're gonna quit that easy?

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Grab a chainsaw or a katana and make myself some hand puppet's.

Edited by AH64Hunter
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GTAForums.com: Keeping Zombie Apocalypse Awareness Alive Since 2011

 

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RobsEpicFret

i actually planned a zombie apocalypse situation as a kid after watching that one movie _____ of death forgot name,but in the one i posted earlier i actually use real items that i have,yes i have 50 kunais that i got from my jappanese friend in my birthday.

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Hide in the corner like a little bitch and cry. Eventually pluck up the courage to look out the window then panic and wait for someone to come help. Y'know, like 90% of you would.

 

Also:

[shaun of the Dead references, all of them, you don't need to do any]

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GTAForums.com: Keeping Zombie Apocalypse Awareness Alive Since 2011

 

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*2001.

 

I'd kill myself. Even if you do manage to survive the zombie attacks, it'd be a sh*t existance.

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leik oh em jeez!

Have sex with zombie neighbor while using her body as a humanzombie shield.

 

Oh, I meant, ummm....

Find guns & ammo?

 

 

 

 

Really? The mall? Where there's thousands of people zombies and a large selection of clothes and shoes? Yeah, you'll be dead.

 

First you need to hit up the closest house you KNOW has some sort of gun. Next, steal a 4wd full-size american SUV. (Preferably 4x4 Suburban 2500, will explain later on.) Take your new SUV and gun to the nearest Pawn shop. Obtain 2-3 hand guns, a 1-2 shotguns, and several rifles. Load up as much ammo as you can carry and shove it all in the back seat of your SUV.

 

Next step depends on your priorities.

 

I feel the best thing to do at this time is to find yourself a woman that is not yet a zombie, and claim her as your bride. (It shouldn't be too hard, she has a choice between being with you or becoming a zombie.)

^This step is optional, you have more time to find food/shelter by skipping it, but you will be forever alone.

 

Now, your primary goal should be finding some sort of safe house. You will want a garage w/ a remote to open/close the door. NOT in the woods. You'll never see them coming. NOT a mall. Too many zombies to clear out before you could secure it. You may want to find a Military base nearby. If the U.S. military isn't going out saving the people, you know they'll be saving themselves and keeping that base secure at all costs. They might help you, or they might tell you to f*ck off. It's worth a try though.

 

Once you have found a place to stay for a while, STAY THERE for the night. Eat food if you have it. If not, wait until morning.

Once morning comes around, the zombies will have calmed down some. (They're still zombies, and want to eat your brain, so don't let your guard down.) This should make it easier to raid a convenience store for it's food/drink. Take your supplies back to your safe house. ALWAYS keep some water and dry food in your SUV. Oreos, chips, nuts, etc. to live off of should you have to stay in it for a few days. Now you will want to head to construction site, or a shop for a company that will have a generator. What you are looking for is a generator trailer. You're not going to get a good one that you'll be able to move around by yourself so just get a big one that's built on a trailer. This will provide you with power when the power plants shut down. Bring it back and put it in your garage. Work out a ventilation system for the exhaust if you can.

 

Next you will want to head to a book store. Shouldn't be too many people zombies. Look for books on EVERYTHING. DIY handbooks and such. You will also want to upgrade your vehicle eventually, so find somebooks you think might help you with that. (Slight lift, cut out fenders, 37" Wrangler MT tires, grill guard, steel bumpers, etc.)

 

Now, with a 3-4 inch lift and a lot of cutting/trimming, you should have room for 37" tires. Now comes the reason for a 3/4 ton suburban. The Suburban 2500 uses the same 8-lug bolt pattern as the Hummer H1. That means, you can just take the wheels and 37" runflat tires off any HMMWV (aka Humvee) and put them right onto your SUV without having to find and fit wheels and tires. The military should have made some failed attempt at containing the zombies, which should leave HMMWVs readily available. You want to keep one to drive, and take the wheels/tires off the rest to use tham as spares for your suburban.

 

Next task is to raid a K-Mart. It should have plenty of food, but not be too hard to secure. (Good luck trying to kill everyone in a Wal-Mart Supercenter)

 

Now you should have enough supplies to defend yourself against any zombie, and live off of for at least a month or two before you need to re-supply. You may want to find a large boat that you can take out sometimes. It will make you sleep better. Hit up Wal-Mart or other grocery stores as needed to re-supply yourself.

Edited by leik oh em jeez!
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Wannabe Answer: I'd grab guns and ammo and take back the whole state. I'd jack some cars and run over zombies, watching their brains splatter on my windshield. Then I'd get out and take on a whole army with my chainsaw.

 

Real Answer: I'd sit in the corner and cry like a little bitch.

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If your situational awareness is so bad you managed to not only miss an undead event large enough to take out phones and TV, but get within lunging range of the mailman and somehow miss a naked women on the street, you're probably not going to last long either way. wink.gif

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First of all. I get my closes Relatives.

I would then, drive over to my friends place over a hill were it is deserted.

Pick him up, get his fireworks, slug guns, get his motorbikes and his chainsaws, knifes ect. Get

petrol (Which my friends dad would have plenty of, he is a road side assistant). We would get

all the car and lock the doors for starters.

 

We would stay in the car and wait. Once the zombie invasion calms down after a few days.

We would travel towards 'Sydney'. Our capital City.

We would travel on the outskirts of Sydney until we get over to Ku-rin-gi national park were we will

camp.

Afterwards, when we feel safe enough. We would drive South-West towards inland (To a town called Orange).

Once we make it out there. We would get my uncle.

But on the way getting to Orange, we would invade super-markets to get supplies and sleep in towns for

different nights. We would do the exact same thing until safety. Travel further inland were their is less population

(But harder to find food).

 

Eventually, People would come. Once we get right inland were their is no humans. We would travel back the way we came

and find help in Sydney. The same reunite back and forth. If worse comes to worse, we would travel across the country to

get to Perth were the population is average but enough food and would be safe enough.

That would all be around almost 2 years for that whole thing. Finding human survivors would be easy, they'd contact through radio

and live in packs/clans.

If they are not savage, it would be good. But you could never trust anyone other except your own clan.

 

Help will come, unless the whole world is invaded. Then, it would be much difficult. You just need to know when

the invasion or wave happens.

 

That's my plan. You can use my advice, it will come handy if that ever happens.

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macorules94

First thing I'd do is secure my house and make sure nothing can get in. I'd have my car in the garage with a full tank and supplies of food and clothing, and camping equipment. Then I'd chill in my house until the zombies find a way to get in, then when I'm screwed I'll go into my car, crash out the garage door and speed into the outskirts of the city and camp, and keep driving places until I find other people.

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The Unvirginiser

Probably sh*t my f*cking trousers.

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Well, I would search for survivers, take around 4 buildings, then live out the rest of life like this game

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Probably sh*t my f*cking trousers.

If I didn't do this first, I would at least try to round up people I know who possess certain skills and basically try and survive as a tribe as long as possible. People I'd need:

 

1) Pilot

2) Your average "nerd"; someone who understands chemistry and physics exceptionally well.

3) A level-headed redneck - one who isn't a complete retard, and knows how to operate (and owns) all different kinds of firearms and other heavy machinery.

4) Hot chick. For you know what, and if we find ourselves in a sticky situation with Zombies, we can always sacrifice her. Gotta have a gambling token.

5) French person - so they can cook for us on a daily basis and make baguettes.

6) Funny guy - because in such trying times, you've got to lighten the mood a little bit.

 

 

Ideally we'd all fly to the Cape Verde Islands, Madagascar, or somewhere in the caribbean and just hang out, eating cheese and bread while laughing over some classic jokes and follow it up with a gang-bang of the chick. c'est la vie, c'est la vie...

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Grab useful weapons (No guns, sadly), food and supplies I'll need, then go up to the 3rd story (I live in one of those project-esque apartment complexes) and board down the defences. Ration out food and water. Listen for updates via radio, internet and television. At the point that my food becomes packable and freely able to travel with, I'd scout of the 360 degree view of via the large windows at the top of this building, then go down and figure out where to go from here.

 

Ideally, I'd make it to the coast, but hell knows I'm about as far as possible from it. I'd wait until cracked.com's '6 reasons a zombie apocalypse would fail' to come into effect (rotting flesh, freezing tissue, etc) and then look for survivors. At this point I'm fairly certain that if I was alive I'd be a reincarnation of Mad Max.

 

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Brown Sugar

1. Find anthony cumia, he has a plan so I don't need to think of one.

2. avoid using melee weapons because you don't want the zombies getting up close

3. follow cumia's plan and hijack a boat, get the f*ck out of there.

 

the best strategy evar

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Grab some food and a good melee weapon (like a cricket bat) run to the nearby dockyard, steal a yacht, sail to Tasmania.

BOOM! Saved.

 

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