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Tell me what you think of the start to my book!


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Personally i think there's a lack of Atmosphere, there's no tension that leads up to the big assasination. I think you could improve it with more writing between where people speak. However i'm no author either so i'll let sombody else judge aswell.

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This is a good start and will be better around the middle biggrin.gifsmile.gifcolgate.gif

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Just one question.

 

If the guys in suits had knives and the main characters had guns, why didn't they just kill them? I mean, just bcause their car was gone doesn't mean they can't shoot people. Why run away?

 

And they could always steal somebody else's car when they were done.

pkmTc.gif

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You should improve on your formatting, it's only a new line for a new speaker not a new line every sentence.

 

Hope that helps.

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