The Ultimate Badass

[Wordsworth]

 

This is Joseph Kittinger jumping out of a helium balloon at 102,800 feet. I have one question:

 

Why do we never hear about guys like this in history books?

 

In 1958, the US Air Force told this guy he was going to be loaded up into the gondola of a giant helium-filled balloon, lifted 76,000 feet into the stratosphere whereupon he would jump the f*ck out and rocket back down to Earth eventually reaching a top speed of 600 MPH. Because when you're not in the atmosphere, terminal velocity is only really a theoretical concept.

 

When he hit atmosphere and slowed down, he rolled into an uncontrollable flat-spin at roughly 120 RPM-- the g-force exerted by that spin reached a calculated 22Gs.

 

And he did it again in 1960 at 102,800 feet. During the ascent, at roughly 80,000 feet, his pressurization suit malfunctioned and his right hand swelled to twice it's normal size. He kept going. When he reached altitude and jumped, he fell for four minutes straight-- probably squealing "Wheeeee!" the whole way down.

 

To get some perspective on that height, Mt. Everest is a mere 29,000 feet. Trans-Atlantic jets fly at around 40,000 feet. The Concorde cruised at 54,000. It's roughly 20 miles straight up, roughly how many miles I live from downtown Houston.

 

Ho-hum, 12 years later he was shot down flying over Northern Vietnam and imprisoned in the Hanoi Hilton for 11 months.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81gn2oLeC_U

 

He's 81 now-- and on the worst day of his life, he's twice good as you are at the best thing you can do. Bow down.

 

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to try to find someone who out-badasses ol' Joe here. Frankly, I think it's an impossible task. But some of you are crafty like lemurs or deers or iguani and will try.

 

Another question I have is-- why aren't we doing retarded sh*t like this in the name of science anymore? Have we figured out all the science already? Step it up, NASA.

[Robinski]

This is so true. The guy literally jumped from the top of the world. Or, at least, as close as we've gotten so far. The footage from the balloon as he jumps is one of the most surreal things you can see that actually happened. It's just astonishing.

 

I think I remember hearing something about Red Bull backing a guy who was planning on breaking the record. You know if someone's going to do crazy sh*t just for the hell of it, Red Bull are likely to giving them heaps of dosh to do it with their logo on their back. Anyone know if I'm talking out of my ass or not?

Edited November 24, 2010 by Robinski

[Ats.]

Holy sh*t, that's one bad motherf*cker. Really inspiring in some ways. The guy was skydiving with 1000km/h speed, epic...

[SIKKS66]

I was reading about that guy recently, he's f*cking crazy for sure.

 

I'll give your challenge a go.

 

 

Simon Mann

 

Been reading about this guy at uni. Went to Eton (so pretty smart, comes from a well-off family, not a good start I know) and after leaving went to officer training at Sandhurst (getting closer to "badass"). Reached the rank of Lieutenant in the Scots Guards (no mean feat) before joining the SAS and serving in Cyprus and Northern Ireland amongst other places (so he's obviously hard as f*ck). Left the military, went into the oil business (more money, not exactly "badass" though) before trying to sneak 69 heavily armed men into Africa on a 727 to attempt to overthrow a government (wait...WHAT!?). Given a sh*t load of time in a tough old African prison but finally got out under humanitarian grounds last year. Also did a bit of acting playing a Para Colonel in Paul Greengrass's Bloody Sunday.

 

So in summary; rich, tough as nails, clever as f*ck and a tad big crazy mercenary who's served in the most "badass" army regiment in the world and attempted a coup. Mad, bad and dangerous to know as they say.

 

Not sure if he beats a guy who jumps out of a balloon at 100k feet but pretty close I would say. I certainly thought the guy sounded like a badass when I read about him.

[tubbs51]

Chuck Norris

 

you had to have known that was coming

 

 

[Slynke]

If you've never seen the video footage from his jump, it will blow you away..

[LanceVanceDance07]

If you've never seen the video footage from his jump, it will blow you away..

And I just did, that jump was incredible. When he jumps out of the balloon at roughly 102600 ft from the surface, you can see the actual curvature of the earth as he falls, astonishing.

[Ferddy987]

That's very badass. I couldn't imagine him jumping out of a hotair balloon that high.

[Mark]

Not as badass, but Lars Rådeström was pretty mad. He was a test pilot on the JAS-39 Gripen, ended up crashing them twice before deciding it's about time he retired. Both incidents were put down to pilot induced oscillation, however the aircraft wasn't exactly stable in prototype form.

[ass reamer]

 

Jack Churchill was one bad motherf*cker.

[Slingaa]

Holy sh*t.

 

But how could a hot air balloon get up so high?

[Wordsworth]

Holy sh*t.

 

But how could a hot air balloon get up so high?

It was a helium balloon, which is lighter than air, and he was still within the gravitational pull of the Earth so he was able to fall and not float off into space.

[Black-hawk]

The only thing pushing him down to earth were his balls of steel.

[unopescio]

Thats nothing.

 

[dog_day_sunrise]

 

Not as badass, but Lars Rådeström was pretty mad. He was a test pilot on the JAS-39 Gripen, ended up crashing them twice before deciding it's about time he retired. Both incidents were put down to pilot induced oscillation, however the aircraft wasn't exactly stable in prototype form.

Can I add William J. Knight to this one, who has the world record for the fastest powered level flight inside the earth's atmosphere? Mach 6.72 or over 4500 mph.

[-slash]

As soon as I saw this topic title I knew I'd have to post Jack Churchill.

 

Someone already beat me to it so I'll just reiterate.

 

This is a guy who signed up for the Commandos in WW2 as it, "Sounded dangerous."

 

Armed himself with a bow and arrow and a sword. Signalled an attack by skewering a German Officer with an arrow, and marched into battle with his bagpipe playing.

 

I mean the bloke jumped up with his sword once and scared 42 Germans into surrendering.

 

 

What a badass.

 

[dog_day_sunrise]

Another one- and a personal hero of mine- Paul Van Ripper.

 

A retired general who fought in 'Nam and Desert Storm, he was tasked with playing the "red" (aggressor) team in the Millennium '02 war-game. Through clever use of intelligence and irregular warfare tactics, he succeeded in "sinking" an entire US Carrier Battle Group, along with a simulated 20,000 personnel, within the first hour of the war-game starting. In fact the defeat was so crippling that the war-game was restarted with Ripper being given a set plan to follow, leading to him accusing the US of wasting $1/4 billion trying to enforce a doctrine that didn't work, and promptly quitting.

 

If the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan prove anything, it's that he was totally and utterly correct.

[Robinski]

I mean the bloke jumped up with his sword once and scared 42 Germans into surrendering.

Occasionally in life you'll come across these people. These people are so mentally unhinged, so ridiculously removed from the rest of us, that you know not only would they kill you the first chance they get, but that they'd enjoy it on another level. These people are instantly recognisable, by something you can't often see (although, sometimes it's a sword where an automatic weapon should be), that upon seeing them you just give up and hope they don't kill you slowly.

 

This guy sounds like on of them.

[WF the Hobgoblin]

I think you'll find that this is The Ultimate Badass:

 

[Jesus'En'Hitler420]

Churchill versus Kittinger... who would win?

[Lithium]

 

Eh am I right, am I right? lol

 

 

 

Naw this is who I think is really a bad ass in his own way.

 

Vasily Zaitsev

 

 

 

Some of you may have saw the film Enemy at the gates? That was about him.

[dog_day_sunrise]

 

Some of you may have saw the film Enemy at the gates? That was about him.

Pah, your sniper skillz are weak.

Simo Häyhä- 505 confirmed kills, unconfirmed in the mid 800s.

 

[Robinski]

Goddamit, as soon as I saw that Vasily picture Simo Hayha sprung to mind. I was poised to post about him. Not only did he have mad skills in concealment and marksmanship, he did it all with a (most of the time) unscoped rifle, preferring iron sights just so he didn't have to raise his head those extra few cm and risk being seen.

 

He was just one of many badasses from the Winter War in Finland though. Their whole army was badass. Check our the Strength and Casualty stats for both sides. The Fins were outnumbered obscenely in the amount of men on the ground, and the russians had, at the very least, 78 times as many tanks and 34 times more aircraft. Nevertheless, the losses on each side are just as one sided. Finland had somewhere in the region of: 26,000 dead/missing, 43,000 wounded and 30 tanks destroyed. Whereas Russia had: 126,000 dead/missing, 188,000 wounded and 3,500 tanks gone.

 

Rock on Finland. You may have actually lost a lot of land, but by God did you give 'em hell.

[nerner]

 

You remember how your mother always taught you, "Don't judge a book by its cover." Yeah well the part she left out was the full phrase: "Don't judge a book by its cover or else it'll do something so manly that it'll make your testicles retreat back into your body." That brings me to Audrey Murphy who, despite being about 5 feet tall at age 16, signed up for the army. Since they really saw him as nothing more than a bullet shield, they let him up for the army.

 

During a huge battle Murphy destroyed several sniper roosts by himself with grenades and his gun fire. Actually the whole scenario was oddly similar to what Alvin York did up there. The difference being that a. York was far taller than Murphy and b. I'm not done yet. Moving on. Did you ever hear of the Battle of the Bulge? The thing that if it ever got adapted for film it'd be more epic than 300 and Lord of the Rings combined? Do you want to know why I said that? Do you really want to know?

 

During the battle the Americans had many tanks on their side which got ripped down by enemy gunfire and what-not. Upon hearing that reinforcements weren't due for another hour or so Murphy hopped upon one of the destroyed tanks with a machine gun turret. Now just to let you know it had a full tank of gas and was on fire so it was a blatant hazard. Murphy used the machine gun to hold off the advancing German troops on 3 separate sides for a good hour or so. That'll do it. (Before I move on, I have to really admire the bravery of the German soldiers here. I'm talking about the guys who just saw a couple hundred of their comrades got mowed down inches before them and still attempted to take down Murphy.)

 

Most Badass Moment: Murphy's badassery didn't end when the war did. Later on during the 50s he got addicted to a drug. Now while most of us would probably enter rehabilitation, Murphy just locked himself in a motel room for a couple weeks and got over it the manly way.

 

Wins the most badass Audrey award by a street from Audrey Hepburn.

[dog_day_sunrise]

 

Goddamit, as soon as I saw that Vasily picture Simo Hayha sprung to mind. I was poised to post about him. Not only did he have mad skills in concealment and marksmanship, he did it all with a (most of the time) unscoped rifle, preferring iron sights just so he didn't have to raise his head those extra few cm and risk being seen.

 

He was just one of many badasses from the Winter War in Finland though. Their whole army was badass. Check our the Strength and Casualty stats for both sides. The Fins were outnumbered obscenely in the amount of men on the ground, and the russians had, at the very least, 78 times as many tanks and 34 times more aircraft. Nevertheless, the losses on each side are just as one sided. Finland had somewhere in the region of: 26,000 dead/missing, 43,000 wounded and 30 tanks destroyed. Whereas Russia had: 126,000 dead/missing, 188,000 wounded and 3,500 tanks gone.

 

Rock on Finland. You may have actually lost a lot of land, but by God did you give 'em hell.

Perfect example of tactics trumping brute force in warfare. Many nations have much to learn from the Finns.

 

EDIT:

 

Another one of my idols- Hans-Ulrich Rudel AKA the Tank Destroyer.

 

Most decorated member of the German forces during WW2, by the end of the war his kill roster was:

>519 tanks

>150 artillery pieces

>70 landing craft

>800 light vehicles

>9 aircraft in dogfighting

>4 armoured trains

>2 destroyers

>A cruiser

>A battleship

 

Most achieved with 20 or 37mm cannon fire or unguided bombs.

 

Later had significant input in the design of the A-10 Thunderbolt II tank-hunting aircraft.

Edited November 25, 2010 by dog_day_sunrise

[Robinski]

The amount of testosterone and pure manliness is overpowering in here. Seeing as we're on the subject, how about we mix it up with the best female sniper in history?

 

 

Lyudmila Pavlichenko was a sniper in the Red Army during WWII, joining up as part of the response to Nazi war machine turning on Russia. Of her 309 confirmed kills during the war, 36 of them were enemy snipers themselves. She could easily be a contender for most dangerous woman to be near in WWII. She was quickly picked up by the Russian public and became quite famous, and as such made publicity visits to both the Canada and the US, where many journalists were more interested in her uniform than her service. Way to be progressive guys.

 

Seems like WWII was pretty much an age full of badasses. I guess the worst can bring out the best ( or the worst depending on how you look at it) in certain people.

Edited November 25, 2010 by Robinski

[860]

 

Rock on Finland. You may have actually lost a lot of land, but by God did you give 'em hell.

Fun fact of the day: Finland used to look like a woman in a dress.

 

 

Also for badassery, this dude may not have jumped from 100,000 ft but he definetly has the spark of badass in him.

 

 

Edited November 25, 2010 by 860

[Lithium]

The amount of testosterone and pure manliness is overpowering in here. Seeing as we're on the subject, how about we mix it up with the best female sniper in history?

 

 

Lyudmila Pavlichenko was a sniper in the Red Army during WWII, joining up as part of the response to Nazi war machine turning on Russia. Of her 309 confirmed kills during the war, 36 of them were enemy snipers themselves. She could easily be a contender for most dangerous woman to be near in WWII. She was quickly picked up by the Russian public and became quite famous, and as such made publicity visits to both the Canada and the US, where many journalists were more interested in her uniform than her service. Way to be progressive guys.

 

Seems like WWII was pretty much an age full of badasses. I guess the worst can bring out the best ( or the worst depending on how you look at it) in certain people.

I wonder if almost all young men wanted to be a sniper when they grew up because of people like these? I know that's what I always wanted to be.

[Typhus]

 

There was this Italian guy in the early 20th Century called Gabriele d'Annunzio. He was a poet who assembled an army of mercenaries and took over the town of Fiume, turning it into its own country. He was in World War 1 and apparently leapt over the trenches with a dagger between his teeth and flew over Vienna, dropping leaflets which told people how great he was!

It's a pity he influenced Mussolini and Fascism so much. But his story is still very cool.

Edited November 25, 2010 by Typhus

[Struff Bunstridge]

Speaking of Hayha...

 

Badassery.