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My Chain Story

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LJ: ´Niko. Roman.´

Badman: ´Wher meha breddahs?´

LJ: ´Look! They have an elephant riding on them! Haha!´

Badman: ´Averethang I seh ar stars meh bredagh.´


Niko: ´Man, they are high as hell.´

Roman: ´Sorry cousin, I have to visit Mal or she gets mad.´


1. Goes with Roman.

2. Goes bowling.

3. Talks to LJ.

4. Buys some weapons from LJ.

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Niko: "Hey man can I come with you?"

Roman: "Sure cousin."

Niko and Roman hail a taxi and tell the driver to go to Mallorie's house (where ever that is). On the ride there Niko relises that Mallorie was on top of Rotterdam Tower with some other people. Niko tells the driver to change the destination and the driver replies, "Make up your mind". What happens next:

1. Niko phones Little Jacob for some guns and then goes to save those on top of the tower.

2. They go to the top of the tower and pretend to be tourists and then throw the bad guys of the tower.

3. They call the LCPD to deal with the problem (FIB and NOOSE join in too).

4. They take an Annihilator from the roof of a near-by building and attempt to kill the bad guys with the helicopter blades only to kill everyone on top of the tower (Niko then fails the mission and the mission replay icon appears above the radar).

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Niko watches the whole show and soon everyone is happy and goes home.

Niko goes to sleep. The next morning he changes to the gray suit and:

1. Goes to Roman.

2. Calls LJ.

3. Searches for the man with the scarf.

4. He gets surrounded by police.

5. Wants to play some darts.

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Oh look.


The exact same people who ruined macorules94's chain story are posting in this one too. dozingoff.gif

Suck your own d!ck

any hoo...


N: WTF is with these dudes?

Police: we're here because...

1. we don't like you

2.you killed people.

3.we want to

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Niko: ´You want what?´


1. Nothing at all.

2. Donuts.

3. Arrest you

4. I say what what in your...

5. Kill you.

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Random cop: "We want donuts!"

Niko: "Okay there is a Rusty Brown's around here somewhere, hear take $100 dollars and get out of here."

Random cop: "Thank you, for this we will get rid of you criminal record."

Niko: "Alright!"

Niko then:

1. Goes to Maisonette 9 to celebrate.

2. Phones Roman to tell him the good news.

3. Goes to Rusty Brown's to laugh at the fat cops.

4. Robs a police station while the cops are not there.

5. Steals a nice car from the police car park and drives around L.C to celebrate.

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The cops soon start to cry.

Niko: ´Hahaha lol donuts with extra chocolate!´

One of the cops, Sgt. Johnson is his name, goes to Niko and...

1. Arrests him.

2. Shoots him.

3. Asks him if he joins the donut club.

4. Asks him if he wants to be a cop.

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1. Arrests him.

im here to arrest you! yells the cop

i did not do anything! yells niko and runs away

suspect is on foot! yells the cop into the radio

Niko then steals a cup of coffee from a gangster and throws it at the cops head

Hey i was drinking that! yells the gangster while niko runs out of the shop

niko then:

1. gets run over by a taxi

2. the gangster throws his donut at niko

3. the cop gets up and throws the cash register at niko

4. a albanian drive bys the donut shop

5. niko smashes the gangsters voodoos window and steals it

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Niko´s head is soon full of chocolate.

The gangster starts laughing and gets his UZI.

Niko runs to cover and...

1. Gets the rocket launcher that came out of nowhere.

2. Pick ups a donut.

3. Breaks the cops neck and gets his gun.

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The Lolwut Pear




Niko does some "Red Army" sh*t on the cop and he falls on the floor, screaming for help. Niko takes the pistol and runs for cover.

Niko blind fires and then looks to see his result:


1. The Gangster was killed

2. He's still alive.

3. He's not even there.

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He was shot nine times. But he is still staying there.


A gangsta beat starts playing and the gangster starts freestylin´ while shooting at Niko with his uzi.

What happens next?

1. They start a rap battle.

2. Niko shoots him in the head.

3. Niko manages to run away.

  • KEKW 1
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Niko wins by default because of his so called "Red Army Skills". Gangster walks away. But then, a whole team of NOoSE surround the area. What does Niko do?


1. Use his Red Army Skills to kill the NOoSE

2. Call Little Jacob for some weapons

3. Surrender

4. Blast them away with an RPG


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Niko gets arrested. A week later a prison bus wants to drive him to prison (duh) but:

1. Michelle (Karen) takes Niko and offers him to do some jobs for ULP.

2. Johnny and the Lost steal the bus.

3. The bus explodes, because of someone with sticky bombs.

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Niko: "Hey man, remember me?"

Johnny: "Yeah your that guy who did that drug bust and diamond deal with me."

Clay: "Johnny who are you talking to?"

Johnny: "This is the guy I was telling you about. He's the guy who got stuck-up in the whole diamond deal with me."

Niko: "Yeah that's me. Glad Ray's dead now."

Johnny: "He's dead?! I though I would be the guy to kill him!"

Niko: "No I killed him for a mob boss who thought he was a rat."

Terry: "Johnny now is not the time, let's get this bus out of here!"

Clay, Terry and Johnny steal the bus and drive to the old Westdyke mansion.

Niko: "Thanks for getting me out of jail man, I owe you one."

Johnny: "Well we just stole that bus for the fun of it, a friend of mine, Angus has a guy in Japan who buys vehicles well mostly bikes and pays us for them."

Niko: "Huh, well at least it pays."

Terry: "Come on Johnny we are going to Burger Shot to grab a bite to eat. You want to come?"

Johnny: "Yeah hold on guys. See you around a ..."

Niko: "Niko. The names Niko."

Johnny: "Okay see you around man, don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Niko: "Well that's just about everything."

What does Niko do now:

1. Goes to Burger Shot aswell.

2. Goes to his Middle Park East safehouse and goes to sleep.

3. Goes to the Honkers strip club.

4. Goes to the Westdyke Casino.

5. Takes the hidden Sultan RS and does one of Brucie's street racing missions.

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Johnny: ´So...´

Niko: ´So...´

Clay: ´Come on, lets get back to the clubhouse.´

Johnny: ´Sure. And Niko? Ever wanted to be a biker? You could join the lost.´



1. Joins them.

2. Does not join them.

3. Says he thinks about it.

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3: He Thinks about it...


Johnny: Ok sure Why n-

*Niko's phone rings*

Niko: Hello?


Niko: WTF?? You still holding them hostage???




1: Goes to save them.

2: Shoots himself

3: Shoots Johnny for no reason what-so-ever

4: Goes back to Europe

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Niko goes to the tower, some retards starts shooting him so he shoots back. Everyone is on top of the tower. Niko hears a bomb ticking. Niko:

1. Searches for the bomb.

2. Calls Johnny for help.

3. Saves them.


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Niko looks all around the top of the tower whilst dodging bullets and soon finds the bomb at the base of the antenna so he turns around, pulls out a shotgun and blows the bad guys off of the top of the tower. He returns his attention back to the bomb and the timer is now at 00:10 and ticking, "sh*t!" yells Niko. The bomb is not stuck to the antenna so Niko picks-up the bomb and throws it over the edge of the tower, 00:03...00:02...00:01...00:00...BOOOOOOOOOOOM!!! The bomb explodes in the air as scared pedestrians at ground level look up towards the sky, scream, run around and then call the police. Niko unties his kidnapped friends just as the police arrive but then something interesting happened:

1. ULPC walks up to Niko and tells him that if he does some work for him he will not get arrested for suspected terrorist activities.

2. Niko (stupidly) falls off of the top of the tower.

3. Roman asks Niko if he wants to go to a strip club.

4. A Higgins Helitours helicopter crashes in to the tower.

5. The police do not go to Rotterdam Tower but instead all go to Cluckin Bell.

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toni cinpriani



Roman: hey cousin, wanna go to a strip club?

Niko: Roman! I was almost being shot by those retards and you think I want to go to a strip club?


Roman: Yes!



1. Niko hails a cab and Roman and Niko are going to Honkers.

2. Niko asks Roman: Why don't we go to get some better woman at maisonette?


3.I don't have the time for this sh*t Roman.

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´Sure, cousin. I take Brucie too.´

Niko goes to Maisonette and there they are: Roman in the same suit as on his wedding and Brucie more juiced than ever.

They want to go inside but:

1. Dessie doesnt let Niko in.

2. Brucie gets out his gun and starts shooting.

3. They hear shooting from the inside.

4. Gay Tony goes out and bumps into Niko.

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Dessie: "ID please?"

Niko: "I don't have an ID."

Dessie: "Sorry but if you don't have an ID, you can't come in."

Roman: "Here NB take this ID."

Niko: "Why does it say "Cloe Parker" on this ID card?"

Dessie: "So your the punk that stole her ID card!"

Roman; "What?! No uh Brucie gave it to me."

Brucie: "Roman, man what the f*ck?"

Dessie: "Sorry but I can't let any of you lot in now."

Roman: "Thanks alot Niko."

Brucie: "Yeah thanks a f*cking lot NB."

Niko: "What your the one who gave me that ID card Roman."

What happens next?

1. Niko, Roman and Brucie get into a huge fight.

2. Niko knocks-out Dessie.

3. Niko, Roman and Brucie sneek into the club through the cellar door.

4. They all go home.

5. They go to a different club.

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They decide to be this night a peaceful night. They go to XXXXX instead.


1. Hercules.

2. Bahammas Mammas.

3. Triangle club

4. Honkers.

5. Club Liberty.

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MC Sh*tHead


They end up at honkers, Brucie and Roman go into the back for a private dance while Niko:

1)follows them secretly and jerks off to the dance

2)gets his own private dance

3)walks out the club

4)Calls more friends via cell

5)Makes out with the bodyguards

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The Lolwut Pear



A stripper walks up to Niko, saying "Hey Baby, you look like a strong man...Wanna go somewhere more...private?"

Niko responds:


1. "Yeah, sure!"

2. "No thanks.."

3. "I'm waiting for someone..."

4. "You're ugly..."

5. "Bananas taste nice but grass is better."

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Niko enjoys his dance for a while.

He flirts with the dancer for a while but suddenly:

1. The bouncers come in.

2. She takes out a gun.

3. She invites him for some hot coffee in her apartment.


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A bouncer walks in and sits uncomfortably close to Niko.


1. Niko asks him kindly to leave.

2. Niko shoots him.

3. Nothing, they enjoy the show together.

4. The dancer stops and informs Niko that this will cost extra.

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Niko: "Hey man, I would like it if I could enjoy this dance by my self, thank you."


Bouncer: "Want to buy a watch?"


What does Niko do?


1: Buy the watch from the suspicious person.

2: Shoot up the club.

3: Force him to leave.

4: Enjoy the dance together.

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He buys the watch with:

1. Dwayne´s money from his wallet.

2. Brucies money.

3. Romans money.

4. His own money

5. with a fist in the face.

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Niko: "Thanks."

Niko puts the watch on his wrist and the bouncer walks of towards another person and says to them "want to buy a watch?"

Niko then puts his attention back on the stripper but she replies "That was fun" and walks away. Niko is angry that he missed his private dance because of that damn bouncer. What happens next:

1. Niko goes and beats up the bouncer.

2. Niko leaves the club.

3. Roman and Brucie are being kicked out of the club.

4. Gun shots are heard from the room Roman and Brucie are in.

5. Dwayne enters the club.

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