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Quotable Notables @ GTAF


Naomi
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Another quality contribution from lil weasel:

 

 

When Alexander the Great put a bounty on cats, the Black Plague got it's start.

Possibly the best (worst) piece of historical revisionism I've ever seen on this forum. And I've seen people claim the earth is only five thousand years old.

Funny thing is that he lived through that period and he can't even get the facts right.

Oh sh*t!

 

user posted image

4XEtraA.jpg

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Another quality contribution from lil weasel:

 

 

When Alexander the Great put a bounty on cats, the Black Plague got it's start.

Possibly the best (worst) piece of historical revisionism I've ever seen on this forum. And I've seen people claim the earth is only five thousand years old.

Funny thing is that he lived through that period and he can't even get the facts right.

Oh sh*t!

 

user posted image

 

 

Oooooohhhh

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Make a joke and our resident 'Sheldon' goes crazy. smile.gif

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Make a joke and our resident 'Sheldon' goes crazy. smile.gif

I always thought that the whole point in jokes was to be funny?

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On the subject of Mr Weasel, I found this one rather entertaining.

 

 

If you treat her right she'll leave a mouse in your shoe as a present. OR continue to ignore her and you'll find something also brown and mushy there.

 

This explains why my relationships have failed. I ignored them and suffered the consequences.

Dudesig.png

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I have found these quotes/quote-trains from more than two weeks ago. I laughed my ass off on that day because some people were hilarious all the time. The following quotes are only examples:

 

 

YOU GUYS NEED TO f*ckING KNOW THAT THEY ONLY SHOW TRAILERS WITH 100% f*ckING REAL sh*t INFORMATION. OF COURSE THEY JUST FIX BUGS FIRST IN THE f*ckING BETA STAGE BEFORE THEY f*ckING MAKE A TRAILER. THEY SAID WE ONLY RELEASE 100% CORRECT INFO. THEN WHY THE f*ck DO YOU THINK THEY RELEASE A TRAILER WHILE THEY EVEN DONT KNOW IF A FEATURE CAN STAY IN THE GAME OR NOT

 

THINK f*ckING LOGIC AND USE f*ckING COMMON SENSE

 

THANKS

Dan, I know you're angry you've been outed yet again, but can't you atleast calm down and have a Morning Drink before you've posted?

my name is SAM, Dan is giving the editor a blowjob.

Hey, Sam. How's GTA V going on? I think we can all agree that it's time for your hourly whiskey to calm down.

GTAV is making substantional progress... O wait thats strauss his script for the next call.

 

GTAV is doing great! the project is huge and we have some new assets for you very soon.

 

 

Please get back in topic or your commenting privelleges will be taken away

 

 

thanks

 

anyone some steak?

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtop...entry1061860192

 

 

I was going to be civil about this in another thread, but it was locked so I have to post in this sh*t HOLE thread thats not even DISCUSSING THE TRAILER ANYMORE. So here we go!

 

These c*nts are amazing.

 

Really. Amazing. They use the deaths and destruction of homes hundreds of people as an excuse to be lazy.

 

A countdown to the second trailer in a YEAR and they STILL Have to delay it.

 

Are these the laziest game developers in the world? Good thing they have Take Two and Zelnick cooking the books for them, this would never work in a normal, non-fraudulent corporation.

 

Sad to see what's happened to a once beloved company.

 

They couldn't prepare for the Hurricane? Really? A multimillion dollar company cant prepare for a storm? No

 

Here's the real answer:

 

Lazy Trailer Editor (Drunk on the phone with Dan Houser): *HIC* Hey danno its phil. Even though its been a year, we're nowhere near the dealine for trailer 2. Somehow it got lost in the process of us going on another Brazil trip. I know its been a year, but some of my mates just showed up with a handle and we're going to party the hurricane away! So i've come up with a brillian ruse: We can just delay the trailer anyhow and blame it on the storm. Those stupid c*nts will believe anything. So whatya say Dan..Meet me in the lobby for drinks?...Dan? Dan?

 

Dan Houser: (sound of someone snorting cocaine) Yeah yeah whatever, sounds great.

 

Drunk Trailer Editor: Yeah, it will be! And we'll tell the boys at Newswire to say that anyone  who complains we'll just say they're COD fanboys who arent respecting those that died and will have their comment privileges removed! It's the perfect scam! Another week of work avoided YES!!!

 

Dan Houser: No worries, we can get Zelnick to cook some books and give another round of False Projections to fool the idiot shareholders. God I bloody love that Evil Lying German Bastard. Always knows how to cook the books and get us out of a pinch with the shareholders.

 

Drunk Trailer Editior: You *HIC* Said it Dan!

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtop...entry1061859680

Edited by Carl CJ Johnsons Brother Brian
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The Nefarious

I knew it was only a matter of time before the idiots from the V section came in here and flooded this topic with their unfunny bullsh*t. suicidal.gif

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Los Santos Pedestrian

 

I knew it was only a matter of time before the idiots from the V section came in here and flooded this topic with their unfunny bullsh*t.  suicidal.gif

At least someone else on the forums has sanity.

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I knew it was only a matter of time before the idiots from the V section came in here and flooded this topic with their unfunny bullsh*t. suicidal.gif

Tell me about it.

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And even if it was meaningful, there's honestly a 1/100% chance we'll ever know what it is until explained.

1/100% is 100%.

This is why I don't like getting into arguments around here. Someone always makes me look like the bigger dumbass, in which most cases, I am. biggrin.gif

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apit2010's DYOM Mission pack plot

 

 

A story begins with Police Inspector David Hallow drinking one whiskey after another. Later, he lost at forest and found by stranger, 1 year ago, He has killed many people who guilty for robbery, killing and other criminals. After a several months, David Hallow had a problem with his wife Jeniffer Kevin. His wife think that her husband always come back home late because meet other girls but the truth is her husband is busy solving a case. After a divorce, Inspector David Hallow being a crazy and drink a whiskey. He thought that drinking whiskey can solve his case so he drink whiskey a lot. (Now back to this year story) One day, Inspector David Hallow was drinking some whiskey, but after a while he passed out due to the high amount of alcohol in his blood. When he woke up, he figured it put he was in the middle of nothing, and he needed to find out a way back to his house. He will meet people whose will give player some tasks, that must be done in order to gain access to his house. After he do all the accomplishments, he will finally back to home,

but after a while he will wake up and realize that everything was just a dream he had due to drinking excessive amounts of whiskey. After he wake up, he will try to back home by using a way like in dream.

 

It seems that the goddamn whiskey was the antagonist of this whole story.

 

 

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That's a good plot actually.

 

To avoid being burned at the stake,

 

Looks really good, reminds me of Ballad of Gay Tony.
After watching the Vice City Anniversary trailer.
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apit2010's DYOM Mission pack plot

[...]

It seems that the goddamn whiskey was the antagonist of this whole story.

I think if the missing words were inserted it would make more sense.

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^ Cool story bro. I'm glad i wasnt like that. No disrespect but i'm a man about it. I call her a bitch to her face ect I don't treat women with kid gloves. I tell them truth and thats why they respect me.

 

Too many guys allow themselves to be whipped for no other reason than being clueless to what women really want. smile.gif They want a jerk like me because i'm real what you get is what you see.

 

Nothing is fake around me. That's why people respect me

 

 

riiiight...

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He sent me this rather touching PM on the same day as that as it happens.

 

 

I hope you've gotten laid since you were 13. you sound like a girl in ur post grow up
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He sent me this rather touching PM on the same day as that as it happens.

 

 

I hope you've gotten laid since you were 13. you sound like a girl in ur post grow up

Wait. What? Am I reading that right?

 

Being a girl = Bad

Sex at 13 = Good.

 

Again I say..

WHAT?

 

lol.gif

 

zoezoedp.png

 

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Everything roman belics brain says I do in his voice it all makes sooo much more sense then!

wtBEybp.png

gLs7a8h.png
MODQEwD.png

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Everything roman belics brain says I do in his voice it all makes sooo much more sense then!

With a slightly drunken slurred touch.

 

Think the beginning of IV. wink.gif

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what if i raped you? i'm quite strong and reckon i'm older than you, chances are i could easily overpower and rape you.

I'd enjoy it tounge.gif I like strong men. It's a huge turn on for me.

 

I'm a vulnerable guy who needs to be held in big strong arms

This needed to be said. wink.gif

23088_s.gif

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what if i raped you? i'm quite strong and reckon i'm older than you, chances are i could easily overpower and rape you.

I'd enjoy it tounge.gif I like strong men. It's a huge turn on for me.

 

I'm a vulnerable guy who needs to be held in big strong arms

This needed to be said. wink.gif

It all makes sense.

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Hi everyone. Just stumbled upon this topic. It's 4:40 am where I am. Whatdidimiss?

The point, it seems.

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Hi everyone. Just stumbled upon this topic. It's 4:40 am where I am. Whatdidimiss?

The point of the topic it seems.

 

Mandatory quote

 

Sauce

 

 

Speaking as a white person I have to say I'm against all white people being extinguished from the Earth. But that's just me.

 

user posted image

 

Ninja Edit: Sivis beat me

 

wZVJHXg.png

 

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lol at the Helghan logo from Killzone. lol at all the names you got from Sleeping Dogs. lol at you asking if you wanted to have a race for the turf then running away.

 

A bit too ambitious with your topic seeing as you've only just started out. Keep it to one division and then expand as you get members. Otherwise your gang will feel empty.

 

Good luck, I suppose.

lol at the colored text.

lol at the unjustified sense of importance.

lol at a failed leader.

lol at flawed advice.

lol at lazyboyeight.

lol

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Another one of my own f*ckups.

 

 

[Application Form]

 

Method, Didn't you apply to our gang a few weeks back? I guess you want out...again?

I figured this would come up. tounge.gif

 

My PC is in need of some major upgrading, and that itself can't be done until February. Its not a matter of being undecided, but the fact that I can't even play with you guys right now. Just makes more sense to try to join up with a console group right now. But whose to say they'll even let me in?

Alright man no worries, if that story is true... But why apply in the first place?...

 

Hope the AoD accept ya, cause we wont anymore. icon14.gif

 

I feel like an asshole but fair enough. Made me chuckle from an outside point of view.

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what if i raped you? i'm quite strong and reckon i'm older than you, chances are i could easily overpower and rape you.

I'd enjoy it tounge.gif I like strong men. It's a huge turn on for me.

 

I'm a vulnerable guy who needs to be held in big strong arms

This needed to be said. wink.gif

It all makes sense.

I think Harley and Roman should collaborate on producing children books.

 

Madonna and Chopper Reed did. So anything's possible.

 

 

 

 

zoezoedp.png

 

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