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Naomi

Quotable Notables @ GTAF

Recommended Posts

D- Ice

Sorry this isn't exactly a quote, but I remember checking someone's profile after they went into a terrorist rant that will make bin Laden himself blush in embarrassment, about how evil the entirity of Israel and the CIA was.

 

Anyway, they still seem to have this on their profile:

 

 

I am an American of Persian-Iranian descent living in Houston, Texas. I plan to change Iran by using violent protests and weapons to take over the Iranian government in 2023. The Islamic Republic has destroyed Iran and it's Persian culture by a lot, although it still remains. I plan to group to a squad with at least 20 members with FBI and military experience to have a easier opportunity to do this, we plan to make Iran a FREE country and ban the Koran.

 

We plan to assassinate the president, the Supreme Leader, many clerics, Basij, and defenders of the Islamic Republic.

 

I seriously don't know wether to cringe, lmao, or sympathetically cry at how can anyone be this dilluded and well... I dunno.

Oh, and they are now also apparantly proudly Liberal, like Stephen Colbert and have an American flag as their avatar.

 

Now I've just made myself a new enemy. nervous.gif

Edited by D- Ice

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Tyler

You obviously don't know my posting records. wink.gif

I've quoted that bio more times then I can count, but it's a bit old for me now.

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D- Ice
You obviously don't know my posting records. wink.gif

I've quoted that bio more times then I can count, but it's a bit old for me now.

Haha so glad someone else managed to see it and find it funny/weird. tounge.gif

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Tyler

 

You obviously don't know my posting records. wink.gif

I've quoted that bio more times then I can count, but it's a bit old for me now.

Haha so glad someone else managed to see it and find it funny/weird. tounge.gif

There was a time when the guy who owns that bio made some topics, and in the midst of all the trolling, me and a few others kept pestering that bio on his topics. I'll find it and quote it for you, watch out for the edit!

 

EDIT: the topic was called Do you Scratch your balls.

 

Well, do you? I recently started doing it, it's f*cking great.

 

I mostly do it in public though. 

 

 

I do, but when I scratch my balls, I always have some sort of vision.. This vision consists where I become an American of Persian-Iranian descent living in Houston, Texas. I plan to change Iran by using violent protests and weapons to take over the Iranian government in 2023. The Islamic Republic has destroyed Iran and it's Persian culture by a lot, although it still remains. I plan to group to a squad with at least 20 members with FBI and military experience to have a easier opportunity to do this, we plan to make Iran a FREE country and ban the Koran.

 

We plan to assassinate the president, the Supreme Leader, many clerics, Basij, and defenders of the Islamic Republic.

Edited by Unoriginal44

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D- Ice

 

You obviously don't know my posting records. wink.gif

I've quoted that bio more times then I can count, but it's a bit old for me now.

Haha so glad someone else managed to see it and find it funny/weird. tounge.gif

There was a time when the guy who owns that bio made some topics, and in the midst of all the trolling, me and a few others kept pestering that bio on his topics. I'll find it and quote it for you, watch out for the edit!

 

EDIT: the topic was called Do you Scratch your balls.

 

Well, do you? I recently started doing it, it's f*cking great.

 

I mostly do it in public though. 

 

 

I do, but when I scratch my balls, I always have some sort of vision.. This vision consists where I become an American of Persian-Iranian descent living in Houston, Texas. I plan to change Iran by using violent protests and weapons to take over the Iranian government in 2023. The Islamic Republic has destroyed Iran and it's Persian culture by a lot, although it still remains. I plan to group to a squad with at least 20 members with FBI and military experience to have a easier opportunity to do this, we plan to make Iran a FREE country and ban the Koran.

 

We plan to assassinate the president, the Supreme Leader, many clerics, Basij, and defenders of the Islamic Republic.

PMSLMAO, that's bloody excellent! lol.gif

I can't believe he seriously made a topic about ball scratching, saying he does it mainly in public. Then that reply is absolutely priceless lol.

 

Thanks for making my otherwise boring day man. icon14.gif

 

Edited by D- Ice

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nerner

 

It's almost 3 in the morning here. I've taken mushrooms and talked with my wife beside me. She was falling asleep, I don't know if she could hear me. I don't really care. I don't think many would actually read all this sh*t, but I don't care... it's more a forum for letting my thoughts out and if I get some feedback that's cool.

 

The thing I hate about forums, is that there are so many ways you could be perceived. You don't know anything about me or my personality other than what I type, this whole online thing is people judging... you think I'm a pompus ass from one of my posts for whatever reason and it is likely that future posts you read of mine will help you on your linear path and your opinion of me will be strenghtened by your perceptions of all of my posts, and they'll generally lead to your thinking I'm a certain type of personality and I'm put in a box... we all do it to each other on some level even if you're not the kind of person who would say it or think it or dwell on such ideas... but i'm assuming. i don't know how all of your brains work.

 

my conversation with diana before, of which i'm not convinced she heard much of, went down as one of my manias. spanning a number of subjects within the sh*t i normally grab from... i just get like this sometimes. because i go through life normal... talk about different things when appropriate and i might even steer a few interactions a certain direction... but sometimes i just let all the bullsh*t flow like this and can't stop talking and talk in circles and never get at the point i'm trying to make before i go to a new one but then a few topics later i'll be back at the one from before. it's talking or thinking just to think. it's bullsh*t.

 

i'm going to stop before i get to obnoxious. i can feel a wave of nonsense coming on... let me think about something with some sense of profundity.

 

i go through the motions on shrooms. i'm afraid of feeling negative and am quiet about it... but tonight i gave out at some point. i rambled on and on about how f*cked up life is and gave many reasons why and even said "and then religion over in the corner there in their own world. i don't have a god watching over me, there's no god to protect me or give me a happy ending" or something like that.... so many good moments i had, so real and alive i felt, a natural inclination toward capsulating it in some way for the masses. it felt good to have it out because i keep it in a lot. you know what, my dad just died five months ago... i don't talk or think about it a lot but it is somewhere in the background and it f*cks with me. yeah everyone goes through it, but that was my dad and i lived through the same times as him and that's why i feel connected to him and for many other reasons. i can't escape myself...

 

i get so f*cking depressed on shrooms but then i just accept it and feel powerful just because i can think. everything is feeding off everything.

 

i see myself in my dad a lot. i think of him and it's hard because he was a person just like me and he lived through sh*t and just died. and i feel love for him... and he was alive at one time and i could talk to him... him not being around anymore is just new for me... maybe that's why i don't thinka bout it a lot. it's just so new and uncomforable and i just want to get past it and live life how i always did... but that part of it is different... no more advice, or talks, or laughs, or getting angry at him, no new experiences with him at all.. it's all in the past. it sucks. its weird. but i find it hard to feel actual 100% sadness about it at one time. i love who my father was to me and now he's dead... just like i will be.

 

i'm gonna post now and reply with more if i feel like it. maybe i'll get distracted or go somewhere. i might not want to come and write more like this.

 

Oldest topic post in General Chat (not including moved ones). Linky.

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Piperka

I don't remember who said this, or when but it was a long time ago.

 

 

Very good, I hooked up with the exhaust pipes of my car.

 

Mmmmm stainless steel.

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Kevin...
I don't remember who said this, or when but it was a long time ago.

 

 

Very good, I hooked up with the exhaust pipes of my car.

 

Mmmmm stainless steel.

My money is on it being Lurch. If you have ever seen the photo of him and his VW you would understand.

 

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LanceVanceDance07

From the world famous "Masturbation" topic, said by "nutboy"

 

 

Why do people watch porn and do this? I dont see the point isnt it like just tempting yourself or does it give you the same pleasure as actually doing it? Also people often define wanking as "spanking the sausage" I can only guess they are reffering to the penis but I dont get, how does slapping your penis give you pleasure. This is a touchy topic but can someone please clear this up in a dignified way, thanks.

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Runey

 

Ok, so before anyone will post insults and other things meant to harm me in any way, I just wanna ask:

What makes gtaforums.com members so retarded and ignorant? Uncle Donnie was too rough on you when you were 5? Mommy sleeps with a guy you hate more than your last dad? Your gaming system is a low end PC made by cheap parts and it freezes whenever you want to play a decent game? No matter how hard you try, you only get a date in Second Life or GTA, and even there you use trainers and cheat codes 'cause no one wants to date your sorry ass? Does your avatar really show your true personality, or you just like to act tough?

Does your life makes any sense since you post topics on how broken hearted you are since your best pal is banging your ex? Do you use this forum to get date advices and homework hints? Do you still live with your parents?

Do you have a job and your own place to stay or just dream about that and keep repeating to yourself you're not a loser?

Did your dad beat you a lot? Did he fingered you? Made you wear funny skirts?

Does your nickname is GTA3kuruma or Robinski?

Do you hate me because I always say the truth?

 

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SanAndreasManiac
Ok, so before anyone will post insults and other things meant to harm me in any way, I just wanna ask:

What makes gtaforums.com members so retarded and ignorant? Uncle Donnie was too rough on you when you were 5? Mommy sleeps with a guy you hate more than your last dad? Your gaming system is a low end PC made by cheap parts and it freezes whenever you want to play a decent game? No matter how hard you try, you only get a date in Second Life or GTA, and even there you use trainers and cheat codes 'cause no one wants to date your sorry ass? Does your avatar really show your true personality, or you just like to act tough?

Does your life makes any sense since you post topics on how broken hearted you are since your best pal is banging your ex? Do you use this forum to get date advices and homework hints? Do you still live with your parents?

Do you have a job and your own place to stay or just dream about that and keep repeating to yourself you're not a loser?

Did your dad beat you a lot? Did he fingered you? Made you wear funny skirts?

Does your nickname is GTA3kuruma or Robinski?

Do you hate me because I always say the truth?

 

quality LOL'ing lol.gif

 

so that means Runey acts like a moving logo, and I act like Rick Astley?

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Robinski

Believe it or not. I actually am a chilled-the-f*ck-out sloth.

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Tyler

This isn't such a big bump, really. These two deserve to be archived into a hall, where things are archived and such.

 

 

Why they all are Hollywood movies(no offence)? And no Bollywood?

Simply because there are about 3 Indian members on the forums and Bollywood isn't exactly popular over in the Western world.

Okay... Let just think you are right & just a correction there are more then 3 Indian members in this forums.

Oh yes, I apologise. There are in fact 4 Indian members on GTAForums.

 

 

How long have you had your E-Class for, Germaniac?

Probably almost 6 months now, still drives like a angel. Now enough about me, I don't want to be responsible for derailing the thread. Let us get back on topic now.

 

I believe it's the S Class S550 Sedan. I don't buy anything else except for German and European made vehicles.

 

That's from a PM you sent to me less than a month ago, in reply to which Mercedes you had. You told me you had an S550 sedan. Now, it turns out you've had an E-Class Mercedes for six months. Why wouldn't you tell me that you had an E-Class less than a month ago?

 

Oh, and why would you post a picture of an E-Class coupe in the Vehicle Chat topic How much was your car worth?, when you said yourself that you have a sedan? Why are you afraid to post how much you're paying a month, when you're willing to post the RRP of the car?

 

I'm not off-topic, buddy; I'm just asking a range of questions as to why you find the need to be such a huge, f*cking liar.

He told me the same, which can only mean one thing...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He's obviously got both. ph34r.gif

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Claude Speed.

Some quotes by Jimmy_Leppard:

 

Should same sex marriage be legal or illegal? What's your take?

 

I think it should be legal, the government has no right to tell people over 18 how to live their lives, that simple.

You're wrong about that, friend. Same sex marriage is a disease, a medical disorder proven by science and confirmed after conversations with doctors and psihologists. And when you look same sex marriage in that way, which is the right way to look at it, then the government, if it's normal, educated and carying government, can't support the disease.

And this "disease" is bad because...?

It's against religion, it's against any normal nature, it's not hygienic...I forgot all the reasons but if you want to find them out, search the youtube or internet about gay disorder...Psihologists and doctors can describe it way better than me.

Link to post: http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtop...st&p=1060269738

 

 

 

 

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Finn 7 five 11

The quote above me cracked me up too, it was so blunt.

 

Here are some of the funny ones i have read recently they were all in the dirty little secret topic and the mega awkwardness topic

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=467250&st=0

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtop...ega+awkwardness

 

Harrisboy

 

My dirty little secret is the black girl I sleep with every now and again.

 

One Man Army-

 

Isn't your crotch supposed to be erecting when you have an orgasm?

 

κενιη

 

All this "I pee in the shower stuff. You are all pansies. I sh*t in the shower.

 

THis one below is two part

 

Black-hawk

 

I pee in the shower

And then

Jay

 

I shower in the pee

 

 

 

 

I was at my sisters house and i was on the phone i finished went to go ask her something, and i went to the door and she was naked....awkward!!!

I didn't see anything, but now its weird.

You need to get naked in front of her, to even the score.

 

That is the only way things are ever gonna get back to normal

 

 

 

 

In that case, I'm glad that mobile internet is so costly over here that I can't afford to use FB on my phone. turn.gif

Really? I thought India would be cheap internet capital of the world...

 

I can't remember who said this so this is off the top of my head

 

 

You know whats more awkward than having your roomate walk in on you while you are masturbating, it is when you walk in on your roommate while you are masturbating

 

 

Big facepalm moment.

 

 

Can't you just, you know, lock the door?

 

When i lived at home i took the doorknob off the other side of the door since my door didn't have a lock.

Yeah, but that won't work if the door opens inwards and in most cases, it does. In fact, I don't remember walking into any house that had doors opening outwards.

Our doors must work differently to your doors. You need to turn the handle/doorknob to open them, regardless of which way they open. Simply pushing a door isn't going to do anything.

Heh, forgot about knobs completely. My house and almost all of my friend's houses have doors with sliding locks.

Edited by finn4life

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Autopilot

 

i say we get a thred (i made it) whwere we pretend were in the gta iv game, fo9r example

 

walkin down manhatten(algonquin)

 

me - hey looks its nikko

 

nikko - shtu up befotre i shoot

 

me - oh sorry im just pedestreian with ai

 

nikk0 - thats okay

 

me - uhhhh

 

 

keep it goin guys and galls!

 

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Mati

 

Hi friends, when I created the topic "Raymond "Ray" Boccino, Let's discuss him" in GTA IV Forum http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=459057&st=0 a lot of people said I would hate Ray Boccino because he was very bad in The Lost And Damned. Well, when I played GTA IV, all I knew is that Jonathan "Johnny" Klebitz stole Ray's money, after the diamond fiascoObviously, because of it I didn't like Johnny in GTA IV, but I was thinking that maybe, when I play The Lost And Damned, I would see a good reason for Johnny do that. For example, the mission "Roman's Holiday" showed us the reason why Johnny kidnapped Roman Bellic. It was because Ashley Butler, his ex-"old lady", was owing money from the russians. So it was a "good reason".But when I play "Diamonds In The Rough", suddenly!!! Johnny says:Who knows, maybe down the line, there'll be an

        opportunity to rip off the smug guido who gave us the job in the first

        place. Come on! Brothers for life, Lost forever.

I was like.........WHAT???? THAT'S THE REASON?? Ok.... IT ISN'T EVEN A REASON!!! It's completely GREED!!!! C'mon, from GTA IV, we know Ray would give to The Lost half of the money, 1 MILLION DOLLARS!!! 1 million dollars isn't enough for Johnny? It's A LOT OF MONEY, IT WAS THE HALF!! HALF FOR THE LOST!!! Ray Boccino would get the other half, but wait........he would share his half with Niko and another of his "guys", and the Pegorino Family........so if we think well, THE LOST WOULD WIN MORE THAN RAY!! THEY ALREADY HAD ADVANTAGE!! C'MON!!! JOHNNY IS GREEDY AND BACKSTABBING!!! WHY STEAL RAY????? So I was thinking more.... Maybe Johnny did that because he was JEALOUS of Ashley Butler!! Ashley was having an affair with Ray, but heeeeey, what's the problem? Johnny wasn't even dating Ashley anymore, and Ray seemed to be friendly and helpful with Ashley, as we can see in the GTA IV mission "Taking In The Trash". Johnny acts like a child, or better, almost everyone of The Lost acts like a child!! Like Ray said "You're all adults. Sort of." They are around 30 years old, and they act like teenagers! People like Johnny, Brian (the worst), Billy.......... I didn't understand what Ray did wrong!!!! It wasn't him who betrayed, who betrayed was THE LOST!!Now put yourself at Ray's place. What you would do? You would think "poor of this bikers,I will let them with my money, I don't care if they stole me, let them with my 2 million dollars!!C'MON!!!! How many times Ray said to Johnny to not get clever!!!!! Obviously that he would want the money back!!!! Jim Fitzgerard disappointed me very much. I thought he was, together with Angus, one of the only intelligent members of The Lost, but after "Collector's Item", greed took over him. The Jim I met, would say "Johnny, it isn't a good idea, half of the money is great, to steal the whole money will only give problems" but nooooo he laughs and catch all the money! Angus, my favorite member of The Lost, said in the end of the game: You know how it happens. It's that f*cked up part of people which means

        good is never good enough. I mean it wasn't enough that we had to be

        drug dealers, we also had to be outlaws, to be maniacs, to be psychos,

        and to be greedy.

Terry  That combination of greed and f*cked up stupidity, that works well. If

        you're in the government. Not so good if you're a f*ckin' crook.

. I completely agree. It wasn't Ray's fault. It was THEIR fault.

I loved Ray in The Lost And Damned!! He was very funny in The Lost and Damned, more than in GTA IV, don't you think? Oh, and I also loved his new outfit lol.gif Fingerless gloves, maybe Ray likes to drive a bike sometimes rolleyes.gif ?

Now please answer my question: WHAT RAY DID WRONG notify.gif ?

 

 

 

No cidamelo, you have it wrong that everyone hates Ray. We just hate him because you love him and want his children.

 

 

 

Good to know you love a murdering, sadistic, greedy Italian mobster who kills people by dumping them in car compactors and listening to their skulls pop. Don't cheat on him, or you'll get it cid.

 

 

Hi friends

 

We're not your friends.

LOL at everything here.

 

 

buzbegone you don't like me too much, do ya sad.gif ? (Ray said it to Johnny lol.gif  lol.gif )

No... not when you spam the forums with useless I <3 Ray/Claude topics

 

Case in point: This topic.

 

This topic is gold http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=468336

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Chimpso

Love that topic biggrin.gif. Cidamelo might be annoying, but at least he's (she's?) entertaining.

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Piperka

 

One time was were on the sea and i thought i saw a shark but it was just a dolphin.  rampage_ani.gif

 

 

hi there ive been played all the gtas and i would love to se a speedo on this game its sumthink tittel but alot of people would love it ive been speaking to loads of people saying it need 1 and i for 1 recomend it

 

so please

 

Yes I know he probably meant a speedometer, but for the fun of it lets just pretend he actually meant speedos underwear.

 

 

I Was searching for my dog's name on google to see what would come up cause i am really bored. so i searched up my dogs name Chloe Bass or Ms.Chloe and OMFG! i diddnt expect to find facking porn pics!! my dog is a porn star i dont know what too do should i tell my friends should i tell the school i am not sure.

 

 

PIX!!!!

 

user posted image

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=369999

 

 

Masturbation has changed. It's no longer about fun, challenges, or storytelling. It's an endless series masturbation sessions done by guys and girls on rubber toys. Masturbation - and its consumption of life - has become a well-oiled porn producing machine.

 

Masturbation has changed. ID-tagged sextoys played by ID-tagged hookers, use ID-tagged thongs. Specifications inside their balls enhance and regulate their final rewards. lotion control. toy control. Porn control. Region-specific masturbation control. Everything is monitored and kept under control.

 

Masturbation has changed. The age of sex promises has become the age of masturbation... All in the name of averting catastrophe from casual jerkers and pro-masturbators. And he who controls the most features... Controls the masturbation war.

 

Masturbation has changed. When the masturbation is under total control......Masturbation becomes routine.

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=369843

 

 

some just need a little push of a cliff or to learn you are not suposed to land a plane inside a building stubit google translated plane manuals

what kind of push do you need?

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=369847

 

 

Has it happened it? Are there lots of ghosts here? How many members have just dissappeared?

 

The computer stuck on gtaforums. Logged in forever.

Are you essentially asking if any members here have died? Or asking if they died whilst on GTAForums?

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtop...st&p=1058501897

 

 

my cousin from buttf*ck nowhere says its great fun to f*ck a duck. has anyone here every tried it. At the water park i work at the ducks come out after it closes and i am seriously considering it

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=369271

 

Oh lordy lol.gif

Edited by Piperka

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Mati

This one comes from WOWAI:

 

 

Nope. One more hint before I leave today.

 

1. I am long and hard.

2. I will give you an erection.

3. Florian Cravic

 

 

Ray Boccino!!

Lol. How is Ray suppose to work with the clues, especially first and second one?

 

 

It works because Ray Boccino makes cidamelo erect.

 

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Tyler

 

Demon Souls dude

Care to elaborate?

 

Oh wait, you're banned!

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Long Haired Freaky Guy

 

To put mouthwash on the disk right?

But that idea is out the windows because I don't have any.

 

You don't have dental floss, mouth wash, and running water, but you have an internet connection?

 

 

I do have running water.But I don't have vineger.

 

Unless I missed something, that last bit made me laugh.

 

And anything else by Ryan 8.5 Really.

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Piperka
Hi friend!! Sometimes I had lucid dream, it's very fun! One time I had a lucid dream that I was stealing a clothing store with Packie McReary at my city's Downtown lol.gif  lol.gif

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Law0070

 

Oh and btw, 'No pussy for 2 months' PPPFFFFFFTTTT, When I get there, all this isn't an issue, she doesn't let go, it's just more natural between us when we're together properly, and I always score cool.gif (Yes, I'm bragging, but why the hell not?)

Bragging about f*cking a thirteen year old girl you found on the internet. icon14.gif

Hey man don't be jealous that this guy's rolling in the pussy.

Psh, I ain't jealous, I've got an eleven year old neighbor. All I have to do is convince her I'm the ugly Jonas Bro and I'll be drilling into her as if she was the last oil deposit on earth.

 

 

made me laugh..hard

Edited by Law0070

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Sunrise Driver

 

I wrote in the 'Condemned' thread below and have noticed that it has been locked. Please unlock it and allow open discussion. This is not North Korea.

Thats where you're wrong.

Its worse than North Korea.

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=410245

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Star-Lord

 

I wrote in the 'Condemned' thread below and have noticed that it has been locked. Please unlock it and allow open discussion. This is not North Korea.

Thats where you're wrong.

Its worse than North Korea.

 

http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=410245

Ahahaha. Don't be messin' with the Waddy otherwise you'll end up getting fish slapped.

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The Lolwut Pear
Hi friend!! Sometimes I had lucid dream, it's very fun! One time I had a lucid dream that I was stealing a clothing store with Packie McReary at my city's Downtown lol.gif  lol.gif

Cidamelo, as usual, never ceases to amaze.

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