My Father's Penis

[Face McDougal]

i don't have the answer to any problems.

Edited July 16, 2009 by Face McDougal

[Oxidizer]

Very intriguing and thought-provoking.

 

Needless to say the title attracted me to this one, but I seem to have gotten the wrong end of the stick and been misled by it. This seems more personal than pornographic (hell, just personal, really); especially with the 57 and father thing.

 

I'm starting to see a pattern with your work now.

Edited July 4, 2009 by Oxidizer

[Ziggy455]

Wow, just erm. Well...Erm..Pfft..It's, It's very Taboo to say the least.

 

Short but it makes me wonder, are you trying to compare yourself to your father in a personal way really? Or just for the story?

[Eminence]

Representing all paternal emotions and connections through the metaphor of a phallus? I like it. The thoughts it provokes alone are deeply intriguing, and the way they mirror less controversial wonderings speaks, therefore, for itself.

[Omnia sunt Communia]

You managed to capture a lot of paternal feelings in a short amount of time and in doing so managed to create a sincere, thought provoking piece. You seem to be giving a voice to the thoughts that most men would like to hide behind at the back of their mind, because, as Ziggy said, it's considered quite taboo to think about your father's penis in such a way.

 

It also speaks strongly about the male mind and how we often associate sexual prowress with achievement. The way the narrator sees having more sexual partners than his father as some sort of victory, a legacy, that he must overcome to become better than his father ever was.

 

The bee rapping it the door also seems to represent the futility and sheer pointlessness of such endevours. The way that he is doing it over and over again without any clear reason just as the narrator would have sex with numerous women without any reason other than to prove himself to be more of "a man."

 

Or maybe the bee represents commitment in a story filled with sexual anonymity? His return to the door might be a methaphor for a long lasting relationship and the simple joy one can recieve from doing the same thing over and over; like making love to the same women over and over again.

 

The only flaw I can pick up in your story is this line:

 

 

Did he ever wonder the same about his son’s?

 

The way that it is worded makes it appear as though you mean to put "sons'" as if he had more than one. Though it may just be the narrator speaking in third-person about himself it seems a little strange compared to the rest of the story.

 

Other than that, it was an really interesting and thought-provoking piece. Defiantly one of my favourites from you.

[Face McDougal]

Thank you. It appears that all anybody has to do to get some feedback around here is post a very short piece with the word penis in the title.

 

Seriously though, this one wasn't an especially hard one to get I guess... you guys pretty much pinned what I was going for.

 

And to clarify, 'son's' would act as 'mine' as I was an only child to my father, possessive of my penis.

[Eminence]

Thank you. It appears that all anybody has to do to get some feedback around here is post a very short piece with the word penis in the title.

Gets us every time, Frank.

[Omnia sunt Communia]

Seriously though, this one wasn't an especially hard one to get I guess... you guys pretty much pinned what I was going for.

The fact that you managed to create such a deep, thought-provoking story out of a few lines of text is a real testiment to your writing ability. It may have been one of your more "obvious" pieces, though that doesn't mean it isn't riddled with metaphors and dual meanings.

 

I must admit, I've been hesitant in the past to read any of your work because of the abstract nature of your pieces, but I have have eyeing up a few stories you have posted recently and I'm beginning to warm to your style. I think it's true that you should judge a book by it's cover.

 

But Frank, in all honesty, you're weird - but we love you for it.