Spaghetti Cat Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 Yes you read it correctly, lost in all the MJ coverage is news of an Asteroids movie. Yes that one, from 1979! In "Asteroids," initially released as an arcade game in 1979, a player controlled a triangular space ship in an asteroid field. The object was to shoot and destroy the hulking masses of rock and the occasional flying saucer while avoiding smashing into both. As opposed to today's games, there is no story line or fancy world-building mythology, so the studio would be creating a plot from scratch. Universal, however, is used to that development process, as it's in the middle of doing just that for several of the Hasbro board game properties it is translating to the big screen, such as "Battleship" and "Candyland." Source So forget sitting around the house, go and see these great new movies! Ugg, what a waste of celluloid. Oh, and the topper? It's being produced by Lorenzo di Bonaventura. Who's that you may ask. He's the producer behind the upcoming G.I. Joe movie. Isn't that just fantastic? I am reminded of the south park episode where Lucas and Speilberg are raping Indy Jones. Thats how I feel about all my childhood favorites that are making it to the big screen. GI Joe, Transformers, and I'm sure He-Man is next. Just can't wait for that candyland movie. Anyways, what are your thoughts on the new Asteroids movie? No Image Available Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hart Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 This is just a way of making a new film, but drawing the attention from the old gaming fans. I reckon it'll be like a sh*t (ter) version of Armageddon. GI Joe, Transformers, and I'm sure He-Man is next. If they make a Thundercats film I'll have lost all faith in Hollywood. Although it's not as if there was much faith in the first place. edit: Yup, just googled it, they're making a f*cking Thundercats movie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fnorg Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I can see them pulling this one off, and keeping it related to the original story somewhat, i.e. people being trapped in an asteroid field. But how are they gonna do a Monopoly movie? It'll either be like a gay Broadway musical, or something about a greedy guy who owns an entire town. f*ck you, Hollywood. f*ck you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 Oh, come off it, you cranky old men. You know if it wasn't an Asteroids movie, it'd be some other piece of sh*t the studio pumps out for a quick buck. Personally, I think Asteroids would make a really funny tongue-in-cheek premise for the proper writer. Of course, I know it won't - it'll take itself too seriously, and cast some idiot like Freddie Prinze Jr. And jesus christ, I can't wait to see what they do with Candyland and Battleship. That's truly inspired stupidity, right there. But I don't get why some of you folks gets your nose bent out of shape when you hear that one of your favorite franchises is being turned into a film, or when a studio produces a piece of crap. It has always been this way, and will always be this way, because at least one segment of the population is willing to blow money on it. Life's too short to worry about it. As for Thundercats? I'd love to see a film version of that. There's already been a crappy Heman movie, so I figure that's why Ang Lee's was put on hold. And GI Joe looks like the biggest piece of sh*t of '09. And I loved the Transformers flicks, for what they are. So, there's a big spectrum of trashy films here. Pick, choose and move on, because you know tomorrow they're going to announce the film adaptation of picking your nose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andyzoot Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 And GI Joe looks like the biggest piece of sh*t of '09. Yeah, it's very hard to get excited about that one. I wouldn't worry about this piece of news to be honest. I can see this ending up in Development Hell until it dies and nobody bats an eyelash. Whatever happened to Sk8er Boi: The Movie? What about The Sims: The Movie? etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spaghetti Cat Posted July 3, 2009 Author Share Posted July 3, 2009 This is just a way of making a new film, but drawing the attention from the old gaming fans. Agreed But are there that many asteroids fans out there? Or is it just name recognition? @Otter: My nose is not bent out of shape. I didn't yell at my screen "Why, my favorite game, they will ruin it!" No it's a thirty year old game, with no story and no plot. Well, shoot asteroids, but that can't hold up for two hours. I mean, what's the point? What's next? Pong? Rock paper scissors the movie? No, it's just proof positive that Hollywood is running out of original ideas. Sad in my opinion. No Image Available Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Sorry, I was kinda aiming that and Hart and Gronf. A spin off of my rant against people who feel like certain films 'rape their childhood', if you will. But I maintain that Hollywood has always been short on ideas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fnorg Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Sorry, I was kinda aiming that and Hart and Gronf. A spin off of my rant against people who feel like certain films 'rape their childhood', if you will. I don't mind the least bit that this POS is being made. It can't rape my childhood if I don't watch it. What grinds my gears is that Hollywood seems to be running out of ideas and pumping out even more sh*t these days than usual. They're scraping the very bottom of the idea-bucket. I mean come on, a Monopoly movie? All I'm saying is that Hollywood seems to be at a sh*t-peak. I can't think of a childhood-raping game-to-movie movie, but take the latest Indiana Jones flick as an example. If I had watched it, it would probably have raped my childhood brutally. But I didn't watch it, my fond memories of Indiana Jones remain. The End. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Hollywood has always crapped out sh*tty films. http://www.imdb.com/chart/bottom ...yes, there are more sh*tty films made today, but simply because there are more films made today than in the past. So I still disagree that Hollywood is somehow getting worse. It simply is, and pretty much always has. As for raping your childhood, like I said in the other thread - you just got to learn to shut it out. Indy 4 was pretty corny but it wasn't bad enough to change my opinion of entirely different films, right? That, is the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vercetti21 Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 What about The Sims: The Movie? etc. ...last I heard there were actually plans for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 What about The Sims: The Movie? etc. ...last I heard there were actually plans for that. Yeah, that's what he meant by development hell. When the premise for the Sims film was spread around the internet, the backlash was seething. It was a pretty lame story about two geeky kids who realize they can control their real neighborhood by playing the Sims. Sounds like a feature length commercial. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iPetrovic Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 At least Halo would make a good movie, but it was bust. And the BioShock movie was delayed or something. Max Payne turned out as mediocre. Hitman? Easiest to do, but they f*cked up the story, can't even believe that one. Resident Evil and Tomb Raider? Haven't watched them, but heard that the sucked pretty hard too. Seriously, are video games that hard to asapt to movies? They should really all play the game - yes, the entirety of the cast - before trying anything! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fnorg Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 Hollywood has always crapped out sh*tty films. http://www.imdb.com/chart/bottom ...yes, there are more sh*tty films made today, but simply because there are more films made today than in the past. So I still disagree that Hollywood is somehow getting worse. It simply is, and pretty much always has. As for raping your childhood, like I said in the other thread - you just got to learn to shut it out. Indy 4 was pretty corny but it wasn't bad enough to change my opinion of entirely different films, right? That, is the end. I agreed with you about the fact that there's as many sh*tty films in production today as back in the day, and I was all like "The bad films don't stand the test of time, and are forgotten", you know, like? Now, sir, I disagree. There are more sh*tty movies made today. I am completely sure of this. There have always been bad game adaptions, Street Fighter to name an ancient one, but now, sir, sh*t is on the rise. But they're making a movie about Facebook. Come on, FACEBOOK? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Garcia aka NjNakedSnake Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 It was a pretty lame story about two geeky kids who realize they can control their real neighborhood by playing the Sims. Ewww, that was the plot? Hope that never sees the light of day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waste Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 Seriously, are video games that hard to asapt to movies? No, they aren't. The fanbase expects each film to stay true to everything about the original and when it doesn't even by a small amount they cry and cry and boycott and cry. People's expectations are just too high and they want everything just like the game, but where's the fun in that? The movie industry also has to concern themselves with money as well. If they made a film just like the game, who would buy the DVD when they could just play the game? The crap that really gets on my nerves is movies made into games... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeperRed Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 Seriously, are video games that hard to asapt to movies? No, they aren't. The fanbase expects each film to stay true to everything about the original and when it doesn't even by a small amount they cry and cry and boycott and cry. People's expectations are just too high and they want everything just like the game, but where's the fun in that? The movie industry also has to concern themselves with money as well. If they made a film just like the game, who would buy the DVD when they could just play the game? Yes but they do have to in some way follow the essence of the game and the actors have to play true to the protagonist in the game. The reason most of them suck is simply down to this Bad Writers + Bad Director = Bad Film The producers want to make as much money of the film as possible so they simply hire cheap directors and writers who make a generic script with a few game refrences then attach the title of a populour game then incomes the profit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Movies about Asteriods Not related to video games I have to say, I really enjoyed. Deep Impact the better of them, and I plan on watching that again. Still, there is a USA TV movie I think on the subject, I don't believe has aired yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemonKing Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 To be honest, I was hoping they would make a monopoly movie and cast Dustin Hoffman as the role of the dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle17 Posted July 20, 2009 Share Posted July 20, 2009 The spaceship in this movie had better be a small white triangle, or I'm not going to watch it. Seriously though, Asteroids? What the hell Hollywood? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
33stradale Posted July 21, 2009 Share Posted July 21, 2009 i think it's just a generic "ship with a bunch of actors in it" like the core and contact.... or they'll pull a "max payne" (or should term it a "hitman") making a non-sensical plot full of sh*t dialogue and political conspiracy, either way i wanna see how it turns out... in better news i heard bout this sci-fi called "gamer", which is about real-life multi-player style deathmatch: www.imdb.com/title/tt1034032/ potential is there but they'll no doubt fuk it up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrJohn666 Posted July 22, 2009 Share Posted July 22, 2009 All of these films are made for kids, tho pressure their parents to buy them the toys/merch. Which in turn creates jobs in multiple industries, helping the economy. Movie isn't out yet anyway, how do you now what it is going to be like? Get over it. Vote with your $ by boycotting these movies if you are so bothered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spaghetti Cat Posted July 31, 2009 Author Share Posted July 31, 2009 Here's a lil update, IGN did an interview with the Producer Lorenzo De Lamas (or something). Hope you find it as funny as I did: ...people say there's nothing in the game, but that's not entirely right. I was attracted to Asteroids, plain and simple, because I think what it tells you is that there's going to be this big thing in space. And my personal favorite: Well you'd better have some guys in spaceships blowing stuff up, or else you haven't honoured the fun of Asteroids. Classic. The plot has something to do with two brother going through a 'seminal moment' in space. I'm guessing shooting big rocks into smaller ones. Link No Image Available Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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