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Your Favorite Quotes


UrbanTheEmcee
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"All I ever wanted out of life was what everyone else had, not more. Just not the less I was used to... Well, I took a real swing for it, you know? And for a while, it was like I always thought it would be. I was one of you. And it felt good. People finally saw me like I saw myself, and you can't ask for more than that... Maybe I did, though. Maybe it got so I didn't want to be equal to anymore. I wanted to be better than. And that's a recipe for injury. That doesn't mean you give up, though. You rest, you heal and you get back on that bench. Life is gonna give me another set, and I'm gonna rock it. Cause my name is Daniel Lugo, and I believe in fitness."

~Mark Wahlberg, as Daniel Lugo (Pain & Gain, 2013)

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  • 2 weeks later...
t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m

 

Sarah Silverman looks like Anacksunamun from The Mummy.

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I cucked Alex Jones

"Every life is in many days, day after day. We walk through ourselves, meeting robbers, ghosts, giants, old men, young men, wives, widows, brothers-in-love. But always meeting ourselves." - James Joyce

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  • 4 weeks later...

"But he isn't wearing anything at all!" - The Emperor's New Clothes

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Reformed Squid

"Recently, I have received the following question from a concerned individual: "A recent report shows that in 40 percent of American families with children, women are the primary earners yet they continue to earn less than men. What does this say about our society?"

 

In order to answer this inquiry, we must first ask ourselves, "Why did cavemen invent the wheel?" I believe the Salarians told them to, but regardless, with the advent of the wheel, we have things like the internet, space shuttles, lean cuisine, and lava lamps. Now don't misconstrue my words, Miss Leakes. I'm not saying we should stop supplying our employees with titty mink, nor am saying the government should cut funding to odorless asshole projects, which seek to eliminate the stench of an anus after it's sh*t.

Now back to your question. In order to vanquish mosquitoes from this world, we need to f*ck those useless organisms up with some powerful sh*t.

Thank you."

Edited by Cloudee
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PhillBellic

"Welcome to the inside or your head. It's kind of empty in here." Judge Anderson, DREDD (2012).

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Femme Fatale

"There's a f*cking head in the refrigerator!" - Police officer during the initial investigation of Jeffrey Dahmer's apartment...

Edited by MotelGuy
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"To live is to suffer. But to survive, well, that's to find meaning in the suffering." - Freidrich Nietzsche

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This may not mean much, but I like it:

 

"I've had a couple people ask me recently if drifting was still fun to me. All I could do is laugh when I was asked that. If drifting wasn't the absolute most fun thing I have ever done, I wouldn't be killing myself to make sure I can do what I do." -Pat Goodin, Professional drifter

Edited by Argonaut
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“The loneliest moment in someone’s life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

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"People believe what they want to believe. Everybody loves a hero."

Edited by Gigs84
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"If one day speed kills me, do not cry because I was smiling." ~Paul Walker

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image.png

twitter // instagram // #KB43VER

 

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the futility of lighting candles only to blow them out immediately is just one reason i find children's birthday parties impractical. -holt




i am a cock gobbler and i love to gobble cocks

LQayY8P.jpg

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  • 2 weeks later...

in order to survive and thrive on their own, the younglings must learn to crack their own nuts. -attenborough

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  • 4 weeks later...

bill- "it's a history report, not a babe report"

 

ted- "but bill, those are historical babes"

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LQayY8P.jpg

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"Hi there, I'm Guybrush Threepwood. A mighty pirate!" (And variations thereof) Almost every Monkey Island game made

 

Also this

 

F97XmyB.jpg

Edited by SnJester
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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.
Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Scott Adams

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TheFlareEntercounter

"Look, I'm not exaggerating when I say the success of your mission hinges on how you use that cardboard box. But in the end, a cardboard box is only made of paper. Handle it with care or it won't be of much use to you. Don't think of it as just another box. Treat it with love... Don't be rough. Okay?" - Solid Snake, Metal Gear Solid 2

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Claptrap NL

''Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.'' - Muhammad Ali

''The champ is here!.'' - Muhammad Ali

''Everyone got a plan, untill they get hit in the face.'' - Mike Tyson (not sure if this where the exact words)

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  • 2 months later...
Y Λ N K X V

I'll give up the water if you give up being a busta

Ryder from Grand Theft Auto San Andreas

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  • 3 months later...

"I ache in the places where I used to play".

 

From

 

My wife just now moaned that very line from across the way.

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bitches aint sh*t but hoes and tricks

  • Like 1

xlE1kif.gif

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Menstrual Deranged

"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." ~Helen Keller

 

I memorized this quote and the sentiment of it was one of the things that helped me get through college. I also say it to myself when I'm having a particularly bad day at work.

CNqtqhc.png

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