The essence of small child.

[Canofceleri]

The essence of small child.

 

Every year 10,000 people will need a bone marrow transplant and 4,000 of them will die without one. This is despite the fact that there are over 6 million willing to donate their own to save lives. Please help. You might have their candy hidden in your bones.

 

My friend brought up this theory in conversation the other day; he said some people think that the world will come to an end in the year 2012. I don’t think that that’s true.

 

Inkblot! Inkblot! Inkblot!

 

“I tell you about what is this essence of small child; it’s this thing the ancients used to talk about. But they didn’t know anything; they didn’t even have chalk or drinking water. Drinking water.”

 

“Could you tell me what you’re thinking?”

 

“Oh, son, think of you! Think of the wonderful things you can do!”

 

“I don’t think what you’re saying.”

 

“Why, you’re not a child at all. Are you?”

 

What is this death thing I always hear of and think about? What about you, surely you understand the parent-child dynamic! What if your father sat you, at the age of four, in front of him and what if he explained to you—explain to you that he is walking right out your front door and he is leaving? He tells you that you will never see him in any fashion again. He tells you that he doesn’t love you anymore, that you’ve spoiled, gone rotten. He doesn’t love you, he doesn’t love you and you cry! You cry because that’s what a child does. Then your father backhands you, smacks you right in the mouth and you feel an intense pain in your teeth. And then he walks out the door.

 

“I love you, dad.”

 

I can’t always tell you everything. Don’t feel too flattered, not all of it is to protect you. I don’t even believe that you’ll die. My son.

 

[Eminence]

I really cannot always decipher your abstract pieces, I really can't. I try, but often fail.

 

There's not too much I can offer in the way of criticism; it's got that distinct style present in all your pieces, a sheen of abstract artistry. The phrasing is, as always, fine and there seems to be a deeper meaning behind each and every word an thought in it - I just can't always see what that meaning is. Maybe sometimes the pieces are too abstract; but maybe that's what you want in the first place.

[ToyMachine]

As hard as this is to understand, nearly nigh impossible to understand actually unless you're high or on morphine, as this is I like it, especially the bulky paragraph near the bottom. This reminds me of the way I write, I like writing choppy, hard to understand pieces. You're a good writer Cand.

 

 

He doesn’t love you, he doesn’t love you and you cry! You cry because that’s what a child does.

 

Great line. It's great to know there's more to this forum than GTA fanfics and cliche short stories.

Edited January 8, 2009 by ToyMachine

[Ziggy455]

Abstract indead, But well written. The 2012 Reference had nothing to do with the story but i liked it.

 

Good small piece when you decipher it's meaning.

[Oxidizer]

The reason I rarely give you feedback or a review is because I just can't understand your work, but that's definitely not a bad thing and doesn't mean that I don't read the majority of your stuff, because I do. And I like it a lot.

[Canofceleri]

Appreciate the feedback, guys.