Lochie_old Posted August 19, 2008 Share Posted August 19, 2008 (edited) I guess this could be a sequel to the story Dial Tone I wrote awhile back. ------- Good Morning Oh hey you, I suppose if you’re reading this you must be home. How was work? Did that bitch Emily work again with you? I hope you gave her a stern talking too after she ate that sandwich you put so much effort into. Anyway, my day was great too! Today I woke up after you left for work and decided I should make some breakfast. I went through the fridge and found some waffles and ice cream; I hadn’t had waffles for breakfast since I was seven! When I finished chowing down I noticed that the refrigerator was missing some groceries. I took the liberty of grabbing the mini-van and heading down to the shopping centre to go and pick up some more food. Don’t worry; I didn’t blow the budget, hahaha. After that I hung at home and watched some TV. I got bored and looked for something to do around the house; I went underneath our home to clean out the crawl space, which is where I probably am now if you haven’t turned around already! I know what your thinking; we don't have a crawl space! To cut short this letter, I think you’re a really beautiful woman. I’ve never known anyone like you and I am so glad that you are all mine. From the first time I met you at school, with your pigtails and your sweet little Hello Kitty bag, I knew that you would be the one. Without you I don’t think I’d have anything else to live for. Basically, I think you are a pretty neat girl. Please don’t scream when you turn around? Edited August 19, 2008 by ~PhusioN~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wanted Assailant Posted August 19, 2008 Share Posted August 19, 2008 Holy sh*t Brilliant. A sequel to Dial Tone is right. Really draws the sense and mind of a true stalker. I'm pretty much speechless here, man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhoda Posted August 19, 2008 Share Posted August 19, 2008 So short yet brilliant. I love how you've left out the semi colons, but left enough in for tension. It makes me feel like I don't know what the recipient has behind her back; is it a corpse? Is it him? Is it something far more brutal? I couldn't have done it any better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oxidizer Posted August 19, 2008 Share Posted August 19, 2008 I ain't checked Dial Tone out, so I'm not sure how this fits into your previous work, but I thought this was really good. I got a soft spot (or rather a hard spot actually) for stalkers, so yeah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lochie_old Posted August 20, 2008 Author Share Posted August 20, 2008 Heres the link to Dial Tone if you want to read. I didn't really consider it a sequel until I finished it and glanced over it and was like "Wow, totally reminds me of Dial Tone." Thanks for the kind words gang! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hayden Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I'm not familiar with this form of literature but it interests me. It's a nice ending, it intrigues the responder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juice By Kayla Marie Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I read this one, then dial tone. There both very good, I want more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danni Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Pretty damn awesome, Phusion. I think this is honestly one of your best short stories to date. So simple in its writing and subject material, but yet sooo sweet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ziggy455 Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Good story and It does fit with Dial tone ya know? With the hello kitty bag and pigtails So whens there gonna be a 3rd piece? Will he get the girl or will he kill her or what!? Great story "I might have laughed if I'd have remembered how." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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