poikly Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 What has happened? There is a lot of green! I see brown too! At the bottom of this structure. I see a bright, blue haze, With many creatures, Running around. There is a lot of blue, with white things gliding across it. And big metal poles Getting put in a pit. Ouch! Something hit my head! Another creature Standing over me as if I am dead. Hold on a minute! I know where I could be! Why didn't I realise it before! That I fell out a tree! --- Heh, what do you think guys? I know it sucked but I was bored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eminence Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 You're right, I know it sucked Heh, yeah. It sounds like you're trying to make it poetic and meaningful when really it's got little substance and it seems rather forced. Also, too many exclamations. Fun for when you're bored though, I guess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Struff Bunstridge Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 What are the big metal poles? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poikly Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 Fun for when you're bored though, I guess. Yep! Done it out of complete boredom! @Struff Bunstridge: Shovels Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eminence Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 (edited) Well that may be but god damnit man answer the question! What are those big metal poles! EDIT: awww, you edited. Silly! Edited May 27, 2008 by Eminence Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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