Frubidore Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I thought masturbation was supposed to be healthy for the heart and the sex drive. I do it almost every morning without shame. Occasionally I will do it during the day, too. But that is usually a warning sign of boredom if I do it then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Jacques Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Remember, if you fail... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EasyTiger Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Good luck with this, you're a brave man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abel. Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Remember, if you fail... Ha, ha, brilliant, oh, and cool signature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 This is solely for those with no female contact as well... I can do this! hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lt_yao Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Ooh this is going to be a tough one, good luck man, I'd say tattoo a face of some scary old man or a really ugly girl on your dick to keep you away from masturbation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carbine23 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I believe in God and i believe in Jesus' teachings, but i don't feel like it's the wrong thing to do. I don't think the either bibles (old and new) said it was the wrong thing to do. I think it was a stupid rule the Catholic Church made in the middle ages because they wanted more power. But good luck mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Recall how Mike Myers as Austin Powers did it??? I believe there's a God, but he created beautiful women with large breasts and I can't help but admire that quality in a God! What has YOUR God done?!?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Why anyone would stop masturbating in the middle of International Masturbation Month is beyond me. Anyhow, I'm sure god will love you more for it! Maybe it'll be like that stupid movie with the kid who's hair is always messed up, where he starts seeing tits and ass everywhere. That'd be f*cking fantastic. Anyhow. Good luck fighting temptation and proving yourself to the One True Gods. If you get backed up at all, go visit your priest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abel. Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Atheists don't have to go throught this. Have you ever thought of the idea of giving your hand to Our Almighty Father and letting him enter your life? When I did a couple years ago, I felt totally cleansed and I've never looked back! Have you ever thought of the idea of giving your hand to Our Satin and letting him enter your life? When I did a couple years ago, I felt totally cleansed and I've never looked back! If God exists, smite me now, go on you fat f*ck, do your worst! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawg1990 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! i thought you worshipped buddah? no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I, too, am a fan of Satin. M<akes for the best bedsheets. Plus, if you get a boner iin your sleep, you can go you town on it. Edit: Dawg, dawg dawg. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 You->to? My Sweet Satin, My Sweet Satin! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swolo yaggins Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! Get the f*ck out, Slamman. Take your retarded bullsh*t back to the 4ums. My God use his wrath on you. 5192:12.3.02LM/SSHmkl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carbine23 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! Get the f*ck out, Slamman. Take your retarded bullsh*t back to the 4ums. My God use his wrath on you. Lol you and me would make a great team. We'd be like calvinists We would go to my town and smite and punish all the stupid teens who do drugs, use people and drink non stop! Even i admit that i want to have sex, but i wouldn't use somebody for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 For one thing, God, as you should know, despises hatred, he is a God of Love, got that part??? He also is not too keen on people swearing I'm sure. We're all subject to Sin on this planet... It's the Devil's home ground for reaping souls....like yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryuclan Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! Get the f*ck out, Slamman. Take your retarded bullsh*t back to the 4ums. My God use his wrath on you. Lol you and me would make a great team. We'd be like calvinists We would go to my town and smite and punish all the stupid teens who do drugs, use people and drink non stop! Even i admit that i want to have sex, but i wouldn't use somebody for it. Let he without sin cast the first stone... Doesn't seem like you guys fit the description... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! i thought you worshipped buddah? no? I'm a Lutheran Christian. I've been baptised too. Shame on you people claiming religion and acting like fools, BTW (I come here to be friendly and funny, not make enemies) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawg1990 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 lol is it just me or i still can't figure out if Desmosedici is joking or not Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saget Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I don't know about you, but I masturbated last night. I'm proudly an atheist since I was 8 |DeviantArt|Flickr|YouTube|#amf| Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 lol is it just me or i still can't figure out if Desmosedici is joking or not As always, it's just you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carbine23 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I worship Satin by the way, on a glistening, moist, naked, boxum lady! Wait, I am trying to abstain, dammit!!!! ARGGHHHHHHAAA!!!HHHH!! Get the f*ck out, Slamman. Take your retarded bullsh*t back to the 4ums. My God use his wrath on you. Lol you and me would make a great team. We'd be like calvinists We would go to my town and smite and punish all the stupid teens who do drugs, use people and drink non stop! Even i admit that i want to have sex, but i wouldn't use somebody for it. Let he without sin cast the first stone... Doesn't seem like you guys fit the description... Yeah i know Religion is getting less important these days though. I see people wearing their crosses or jewish stars around their necks. I see people talking about how they love Christmas and how Jesus is the son of god and important to them. And outside of school or their homes they're drinking, having sex with people they barely know, and doing drugs. Religion is an excuse for innocence these days Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawg1990 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I don't know about you, but I masturbated last night. I'm proudly an atheist since I was 8 I masturbated too last night, right before I went to sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Tequeli Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I, too, am a fan of Satin. M<akes for the best bedsheets. Plus, if you get a boner iin your sleep, you can go you town on it. Damn I was going to make a cloth joke and everything. I'm down with satinism, as the worship of a glossy form of cloth is about as common as 'satanism'. Seriously I don't know what all these evangelicals complain about, nobody really worships Satan. What the hell is this topic about again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slamman Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Take Palmala out, Burp the Worm, Jake the Snake....You know! Slap that Monkey silly! I think he's a closet Satanist. There are those who think it's a Master over one's self, but that's a fools thinking too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawg1990 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 What the hell is this topic about again? how to stop jacking off Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Runey Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I don't know about you, but I masturbated last night. I'm proudly an atheist since I was 8 I masturbated too last night, right before I went to sleep. Wow, sounds like there's a love connection going on. JK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I don't know about you, but I masturbated last night. I'm proudly an atheist since I was 8 I masturbated too last night, right before I went to sleep. Gee, thanks for the update. Did you pop off a few? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawg1990 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I don't know about you, but I masturbated last night. I'm proudly an atheist since I was 8 I masturbated too last night, right before I went to sleep. Wow, sounds like there's a love connection going on. JK oh yeh! big time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts