devilrock28 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I'm lost your not the only one is this a mission am missing or something. You are missing two things. Imagination and sense of humour. I agree with you Breaking Bohan, there are even godammed crack pipes and bongs in some of the savehouses and we cant even use them. I would have loved to have fired one of them babies up while wearing my fingerless gloves. Game is a total failure. Wait a second, GTA IV has failed to amuse you because you can't get high in the game? What's wrong with you? It's a game. Plus, if Rockstar did include that feature, they would be flamed by soccer moms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Bohan Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I'm lost your not the only one is this a mission am missing or something. You are missing two things. Imagination and sense of humour. I agree with you Breaking Bohan, there are even godammed crack pipes and bongs in some of the savehouses and we cant even use them. I would have loved to have fired one of them babies up while wearing my fingerless gloves. Game is a total failure. Wait a second, GTA IV has failed to amuse you because you can't get high in the game? What's wrong with you? It's a game. Plus, if Rockstar did include that feature, they would be flamed by soccer moms. R* doesn't answer to soccer moms - they answer to customers who shell out cash for their product - f*ck the soccor moms! We have more pressing issues dammit! For starters, I have this potentially impregnated landcow and no woodchipper to toss her ass into; I don't have a f*cking silencer so everytime I stumble across a pigeon and manage to shoot its ass I got the police all over me like flies on sh*t, then they start shooting at you - suddenly I'm America's Most Wanted and I have to shoot it out with the cops, probably die, and pay outrageous medical expenses for second-rate care. I still cant find a clinic or an abortionist; I can't locate any golfclubs, double-enders, dope, or classy hookers. I even searched high and low for that little smack whore I ponied up some cash for a while back to take her up on her offer to suck for $, but of course she's long gone, and instead I have to deal w/ snooty sluts like Kiki - who obviously needs to have her f*ckin melon examined and put one appropriate medication - and when I'm not out hustling for cash I gots to keep all my eyes on all these bitches so they don't steel my laptop or passwords and sh*t (I really don't even feel comfortable having them in the same car). I really need a solution (and it better come fitted w/ a silencer ... dammit!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
devilrock28 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I'm lost your not the only one is this a mission am missing or something. You are missing two things. Imagination and sense of humour. I agree with you Breaking Bohan, there are even godammed crack pipes and bongs in some of the savehouses and we cant even use them. I would have loved to have fired one of them babies up while wearing my fingerless gloves. Game is a total failure. Wait a second, GTA IV has failed to amuse you because you can't get high in the game? What's wrong with you? It's a game. Plus, if Rockstar did include that feature, they would be flamed by soccer moms. R* doesn't answer to soccer moms - they answer to customers who shell out cash for their product - f*ck the soccor moms! We have more pressing issues dammit! For starters, I have this potentially impregnated landcow and no woodchipper to toss her ass into; I don't have a f*cking silencer so everytime I stumble across a pigeon and manage to shoot its ass I got the police all over me like flies on sh*t, then they start shooting at you - suddenly I'm America's Most Wanted and I have to shoot it out with the cops, probably die, and pay outrageous medical expenses for second-rate care. You just can't accept the fact that what you're doing is the whole point of the game. You're supposed to be chased by cops. Also, I don't believe there is a silencer available in the game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Pretty simple, my man. U just press Y, then you enter her and throw out the phoetus. Be aware, though, that you'll get a 1-star wanted level but, if my memory serves me well, Kiki's got good legs and you should be able to outrun the law. yeah, and if she's expecting twins, just stop for a second and give the other baby a change to disembark kiki through her ears. Cracks me up every time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Bohan Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 Pretty simple, my man. U just press Y, then you enter her and throw out the phoetus. Be aware, though, that you'll get a 1-star wanted level but, if my memory serves me well, Kiki's got good legs and you should be able to outrun the law. yeah, and if she's expecting twins, just stop for a second and give the other baby a change to disembark kiki through her ears. Cracks me up every time... Do I have to be worried about the afterbirth? I just shelled out some serious green for a new suit and shoes and I dont want to get sh*t all over them, since my drycleaning bill last week was outrageous. On the other hand, I really dont want to be harassed by creditors or child support agency ... so would you recommend I perform a dialation and evacuation or a dialation and extraction ... or should I just go wild rambo-style? Also will it be necessary to sedate her first, and if so where do I obtain the sedatives? Every pharmacy in the city is closed (or so it seems) and I'm still waiting for "the black pill" to arrive from the mexican pharmacy - although they already charged me for it (I confirmed this by pulling up my Fleeca statement on-line). If that sh*t doesn't arrive soon I may file a complaint w/ the Mexican Counsel of Health. This bitch is really driving me up a wall ... Thanks for the tip! I'll give it a go as soon as I can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h-mAin Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Hit her with a rocket launcher in the stummic But since there are no kids in this game, you won't have a problem. So the no problem problem sovled But then it is a problem again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris cambo Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 My advice is sledgehammer abortion Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WackyZacky Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Pretty simple, my man. U just press Y, then you enter her and throw out the phoetus. Be aware, though, that you'll get a 1-star wanted level but, if my memory serves me well, Kiki's got good legs and you should be able to outrun the law. yeah, and if she's expecting twins, just stop for a second and give the other baby a change to disembark kiki through her ears. Cracks me up every time... Do I have to be worried about the afterbirth? I just shelled out some serious green for a new suit and shoes and I dont want to get sh*t all over them, since my drycleaning bill last week was outrageous. On the other hand, I really dont want to be harassed by creditors or child support agency ... so would you recommend I perform a dialation and evacuation or a dialation and extraction ... or should I just go wild rambo-style? Also will it be necessary to sedate her first, and if so where do I obtain the sedatives? Every pharmacy in the city is closed (or so it seems) and I'm still waiting for "the black pill" to arrive from the mexican pharmacy - although they already charged me for it (I confirmed this by pulling up my Fleeca statement on-line). If that sh*t doesn't arrive soon I may file a complaint w/ the Mexican Counsel of Health. This bitch is really driving me up a wall ... Thanks for the tip! I'll give it a go as soon as I can. lol i love reading your post's they make me laugh makes a change to the usual gta iv is a big dissapointment thread or weres nikos gloves threads lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagleheart Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Don't worry about kids bro, the game has an anti-child creation tool put in by R* so kids are automatically deleted after entering the system. So you're good bro. About Kiki though, looks like you're just going to have to put up with another 9 months or so of going out in the middle of the night for rocky road ice cream, or just c*nt punt ftw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 My advice is sledgehammer abortion Hey, thats the name of my band, man...! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mik73 Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 Breaking Bohan, I'm afraid you may be acting a bit hasty here. You see there may be some lucrative business opportunity to be had. I suggest giving www.babiesovernight.com some serious consideration. I'm not sure how they've structured their supply chain, but certainly having local growers would give them flexibility and responsivenss so coveted in today's hot newborn market. If they like your initial product sampler perhaps you and Kiki would consider becoming regular suppliers. I haven't seen their latest financials, but they're extensive radio advertising campaign leads me to believe they are players with the kind of forward thinking necessary to make it in the cut-cord business of next-day baby delivery. Given Kiki's ethnicity I believe you are uniquely positioned to take advantage of what appears to be a booming market for the product you two can offer. I'm not affiliated with babiesovernight.com in any way, just a helpful LC citizen looking to assist another in what could be a sound business venture. Take care, Mik Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i-cup Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 ITT: People who have no sense of humour and can't see the joke of the op. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fats420 Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 lol yeah niko should be able to get addicted to crack, and other drugs, have kids and then sell the kids on the corner 4 his crack money so he doesnt blackout in the street from his addiction DLC shud be drug consuming/dealing/being addicted, guns (SILENCER like in rainbow were u can put it on/take it off guns) atleast!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dojomann Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 guys this thread made me wonder whether you can call up a 2nd girl while on a date with a 1st girl. Shoot gotta try that tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoboticUnicorn Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 FALCON PUNCH Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 Pretty simple, my man. U just press Y, then you enter her and throw out the phoetus. Be aware, though, that you'll get a 1-star wanted level but, if my memory serves me well, Kiki's got good legs and you should be able to outrun the law. yeah, and if she's expecting twins, just stop for a second and give the other baby a change to disembark kiki through her ears. Cracks me up every time... Do I have to be worried about the afterbirth? I just shelled out some serious green for a new suit and shoes and I dont want to get sh*t all over them, since my drycleaning bill last week was outrageous. On the other hand, I really dont want to be harassed by creditors or child support agency ... so would you recommend I perform a dialation and evacuation or a dialation and extraction ... or should I just go wild rambo-style? Also will it be necessary to sedate her first, and if so where do I obtain the sedatives? Every pharmacy in the city is closed (or so it seems) and I'm still waiting for "the black pill" to arrive from the mexican pharmacy - although they already charged me for it (I confirmed this by pulling up my Fleeca statement on-line). If that sh*t doesn't arrive soon I may file a complaint w/ the Mexican Counsel of Health. This bitch is really driving me up a wall ... Thanks for the tip! I'll give it a go as soon as I can. Hey, wait, my man..! Are we talking Kiki here? I mean THE Kiki?!!! I know her!.., lives in lower Algonquin, right? Third story apartment or sumthing? I met her on the net too, man! that two-timing skag-shooting c*nt...! She's been playing us all along....! You have all my sympathy, Brother. still, it's your baby, I'm sure, having found about you and, possibly, other players on the line. Whatever. It's not mine! I was dating some crazy latina at the time and she drained me, fer sure. I gave Kiki a few curtesy-calls, but I never got off..! I just needed some legal assistance and did some man-whoring on her; just hands and tongue and last time I checked THAT's not enough to facilitate conception. No way. Thought I was the only rooster in the house, though, and the fact that others have been around kinda hurts my MALE PRIDE, you know...! What say I get my Cognescenti around your place, pick you up, we go to Holland and find some crack-heads who, I'm sure, for a token of a few hundreds bucks, will work her GOOD with pliers and blunt instruments..? Game, hmm? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Bohan Posted May 25, 2008 Author Share Posted May 25, 2008 Lots of great ideas out there, but it burns my balls to realize this sticky cooze has been slingin her trim far and wide to anyone with a modem ... dammit! What a whore! I may just go home and beat the sh*t out of her with the legal dictionary. Kiki keeps telling me she "may be late" - - - what the hell am I supposed to make of that!? Now I cant sleep, I can hardly steal cars to pay the rent, plus I'm having a hard time getting hot for her when she might be pregnant - w/ a kid that may or may not be mine - and I think she knows it and likes the fact that she can make me look like a fool. I try to talk it over with Roman, you know, just get a little perspective on the situation, but he just laughs at me and then said he was going to tell Mallorie - I had to persuade him otherwise. I got a rep to protect here! I think I am going to take a serious look into selling this lovechild to the highest bidder on the net, as Mik73 kindly recommended, and then I could put that money to some good use ... (e.g., blowjobs). However, I hate dealin with the internet, how do I know I'll get my money from the buyers ... its just all to complicated for Niko. So I have to keep my alternatives open ... like performing the surgery myself, and thats what I've been doing in my spare time, but it's hard to learn the proper medical techniques from the net (area53.net, for example, just makes me more confused). Does anybody know where the library is? Anyone have a library card I can borrow? Many of the terms are foreign and confusing to Niko (what the hell is a "falcon punch"), and I've invested too much time and effort wining and dining this twat to screw it all up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akridine Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 Take it like a man pick her up in a high powered vehicle like an infernus, find a nice long stretch of road and put your foot down, hit a brick wall at 250mph and problem solved, if kiki survives flying out the window i doubt the baby will Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 Lots of great ideas out there, but it burns my balls to realize this sticky cooze has been slingin her trim far and wide to anyone with a modem ... dammit! What a whore! I may just go home and beat the sh*t out of her with the legal dictionary. Kiki keeps telling me she "may be late" - - - what the hell am I supposed to make of that!? Now I cant sleep, I can hardly steal cars to pay the rent, plus I'm having a hard time getting hot for her when she might be pregnant - w/ a kid that may or may not be mine - and I think she knows it and likes the fact that she can make me look like a fool. I try to talk it over with Roman, you know, just get a little perspective on the situation, but he just laughs at me and then said he was going to tell Mallorie - I had to persuade him otherwise. I got a rep to protect here! I think I am going to take a serious look into selling this lovechild to the highest bidder on the net, as Mik73 kindly recommended, and then I could put that money to some good use ... (e.g., blowjobs). However, I hate dealin with the internet, how do I know I'll get my money from the buyers ... its just all to complicated for Niko. So I have to keep my alternatives open ... like performing the surgery myself, and thats what I've been doing in my spare time, but it's hard to learn the proper medical techniques from the net (area53.net, for example, just makes me more confused). Does anybody know where the library is? Anyone have a library card I can borrow? Many of the terms are foreign and confusing to Niko (what the hell is a "falcon punch"), and I've invested too much time and effort wining and dining this twat to screw it all up! Look, I'm not really sure I like where this is going. I thought we had some sort of understanding. But now I think you are getting all confused. Why..? She's a bitch, and no doubt about that, but she's all confused.. Why should that bother a fine gentleman such as you, I wonder. You not a real man? Hmm? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 Anyway, you will only have to look to this fine adress on your internet to find your answers: http://www.popline.org/docs/0414/799016.html Live long, and prosber, as you say... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assaultrifletype Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 ... and what the hell IS a falcon punch?!.., we never had that in the old world. Sure we had the hawk high/low and the buzzard underhand, but the falcon...? You mossad? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coltrane's Muse Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 To hell with a fist to the gut; in my day, a forty-five caliber slug would do just fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pandemic0rgasm Posted May 25, 2008 Share Posted May 25, 2008 If she's gonna pop a predator you better be careful. I don't know if a coat hanger will be sufficient. You know she's a bon bon eater and just wants to get knocked up by as many different guys as possible so she can go on child support vacations. She's a black widow breeder chick. The only way to deal with them is to nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Bohan Posted May 26, 2008 Author Share Posted May 26, 2008 If she's gonna pop a predator you better be careful. I don't know if a coat hanger will be sufficient. You know she's a bon bon eater and just wants to get knocked up by as many different guys as possible so she can go on child support vacations. She's a black widow breeder chick. The only way to deal with them is to nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure! After some consideration, I am leaning towards the coathanger; however, accessing a coathanger is proving more difficult than I first imagined. I sometimes think about just shooting her, especially when she's drunk - what a bitch! But then I remember that I get free legal services from her dumb-ass ... and that makes me pause. Perhaps she just feels troubled because Niko is not from America - she could be bipolar - or she may just be a bitch. You know, I really wish I had the ability to go to an arms dealer and buy some explosives and wipe out the entire block - as you advised - it would be more enjoyable than listening to her dumb ass - yesterday this bitch interupted nap-time! Frequently I just turn the phone off, and go about my business of stalking the homeless and frequenting street whores ... it gives me some peace ... oh, plus I just met this Alex - and Alex is a breath of fresh air compared to Kiki. Maybe I'll catch a dose from somewheres (Alex), transmit it to Kiki (since there's no damned medical care) and then Kiki will become sterile! I'll have to wait and see ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telepath_Boy Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 even when I put on the scrubs I stole the game won't let Niko perform the abortion. This made me laugh really hard. The rest of the post, not so much. But good luck with your new kid, just remember it might be a blessing in disguise. Settling down isn't the worst thing in the world that can happen to Niko... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ema_James2315 Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 Ths could be one good mission for DLC.We have never had a abortion GTA style. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
devilrock28 Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 If she's gonna pop a predator you better be careful. I don't know if a coat hanger will be sufficient. You know she's a bon bon eater and just wants to get knocked up by as many different guys as possible so she can go on child support vacations. She's a black widow breeder chick. The only way to deal with them is to nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure! After some consideration, I am leaning towards the coathanger; however, accessing a coathanger is proving more difficult than I first imagined. I sometimes think about just shooting her, especially when she's drunk - what a bitch! But then I remember that I get free legal services from her dumb-ass ... and that makes me pause. Perhaps she just feels troubled because Niko is not from America - she could be bipolar - or she may just be a bitch. You know, I really wish I had the ability to go to an arms dealer and buy some explosives and wipe out the entire block - as you advised - it would be more enjoyable than listening to her dumb ass - yesterday this bitch interupted nap-time! Frequently I just turn the phone off, and go about my business of stalking the homeless and frequenting street whores ... it gives me some peace ... oh, plus I just met this Alex - and Alex is a breath of fresh air compared to Kiki. Maybe I'll catch a dose from somewheres (Alex), transmit it to Kiki (since there's no damned medical care) and then Kiki will become sterile! I'll have to wait and see ... Yes. You could just get her drunk (Which isn't good for the baby. lol. She's a bad mom.) and blow her to pieces with a Pump-Shotgun. Problem solved. After Kiki is dead, start going out with Alex a bit more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Bohan Posted June 18, 2008 Author Share Posted June 18, 2008 Ths could be one good mission for DLC.We have never had a abortion GTA style. Damn tootin - now that's thinking! I had a lot of fun with the surgery - it added even another level of realism to the game - I have to admit once I put on the scrubs and surgical gloves, I dove right in and pulled a jellyfish out of her groin! When I confronted her with it she said it became lodged there "accidentially" ... or so she says, but I have my douts ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fizziii Posted June 18, 2008 Share Posted June 18, 2008 Why are you worried about child support? Unless you filled out a W-2 for your job, they won't be able to garnish your wages. And most likely, if they take your license, you won't care anyway. So what's the problem? Just ignore them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
square66 Posted June 18, 2008 Share Posted June 18, 2008 or a 3d-tit A 3D tit... bwahahaha! Ok... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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