mubd Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 (edited) Go to this link http://www.rockstargames.com/IV/#?page=gls...nt=interactive0 and click on "Legal Advice". Post the transcript of your chat with the intern here! My Transcript: me:Hi she:Hi. My name's Mackenzie. How can I help? me:I need to sue a man that stole some of my shares she:You can do whatever you want, so long as you pay. me:OK... she:Have you ever been on the Screamer rollercoaster at Firefly Island? Two words: class action. Big bucks. The sky is the limit. me:Are you a robot? she:Am I? What do you care? You're a loser surfing the web. me:ARE YOU ON DRUGS? she:I am a girl from Broker with several STDs. me:f*ck YOU she:Do you talk to your momma with that mouth? Are your momma and your sister the same person? me:GET f*ckEED she:Get what?! Nobody tells me what to do. That's another $100 on your bill right there. meYou are a piss head she:You are too. me:YOu are she:Why would I ever need that information? You know this is a law firm, right? me:? she:Do you have a cell phone? Have you been feeling absent-minded recently? Massive payouts guaranteed. me:Can you spell cat? she:Let me think. me:What about I go and wank off to pop music? she:I don't care enough about it to have an opinion. me:f*ck you she:Do you talk to your momma with that mouth? Are your momma and your sister the same person? me:Do you have fake boobs? she:Where would I get that? But I do have herpes. me:Er, hello she:Give me a break. This is a serious law firm. Our partners talk Latin over cappuccinos. me:Hello? she:Hello. I'm Mackenzie. Welcome to Goldberg, Ligner and Shyster. me:YOU ARE SO RUDE she:If I wanted your opinion, I'd have asked for it. me:Are you married she:I am a fine intern. me:I agree she:Thanks for the information. Now, do you have someone you want to sue? me:You should get a promotion she:Maybe I will do. P.S. I got what the bloke who made the last thread about this was saying, so I made this thread explaining what it was about... Edited April 14, 2008 by mubd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Qw33ts Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 its dumb you can just put 1 every time and they say all the pre programmed stuff just spam it and it says everything thats in the little flash thing.. It's nothing special it doesn't actually respond to anything in particular. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wachizmo83 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 it does on certain things, i typed in f*ck and she told me not to use the f word , then i called her a whore and she said i was rude, but u can totally spam it aswell!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doggson Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 That bot is evil this far it said "Go back to your parents basement loser" "Go die" "I hope you get cancer" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inveni0 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Good morning.Thanks for the compliment. You're welcome. Wow, I just purged a Rusty Brown's donut and my breath smells like paraffin. That's hot. Give me a break. This is a serious law firm. Our partners talk Latin over cappuccinos. You look easy. Are you crusty down there? Thanks for telling me. Now shut up and let me tell you how I can make you a millionaire.I am a girl paid to chat with morons like you. That doesn't really answer my question. Does that even make sense? I guess not. Why. Do. I. Care? Are you ragging? I am a girl paid to chat with morons like you. I suppose that answers my question. That is interesting for a person who's mentally challenged. Anyhow, I think I have a case against my neighbor. I'm so hungover. I woke up on the bathroom floor this morning. Are you listening? I am a girl paid to chat with morons like you. I see. So, my neighbor raped my pet cockerspaniel last night. Do I have a case? Did you lick lead paint chips as a child?Are you prepared to swear under oath that you found a bullet in your Bean Machine gunkaccino? We've got them by the balls. This is a cash cow that's plump for the slaughter.Goldberg, Ligner and Shyster only accepts high-profile cases that settle for millions of dollars and get our picture in the newspapers. So, you'll represent me? We're getting off track here. Has your boss ever tried to goose you at the photocopier? Tried, yes. Successful, yes. Am I upset about it? No. I can't take much more of this. I'm teetering on the brink of a nervous breakdown.Let's drag this out for as long as we can. The billable seconds are ticking.I think a lot of people are.You need to start thinking positive. Ask your doctor about H4PP1 anti-depressants. They've changed my life...and my body chemistry. Yes, I can see that you're developing facial hair. I don't fall for mind games. You can mind my game if you get my drift. No I don't think I can. Darnit. Have you ever been on the Screamer rollercoaster at Firefly Island? Two words: class action. Big bucks. The sky is the limit. Ready to get dirty? I'm so hungover. I woke up on the bathroom floor this morning. Tell me what you're wearing. Why don't I tell you a story about my cheerleading exploits instead? That sounds even better. Carry on. Does that even make sense?Ever been in contact with Asbestos or lead paint? We need to drum up some more victims. What about the cheerleader stories? I don't care enough about it to have an opinion. Darnit. You seem to be one of life's victims. That's awesome. Where there's a victim, there's a lawsuit. You can law my suit, if you get my drift. No I don't think I can. Darnit. Cock tease. I like to be spanked. Sorry, please ignore that. I'm IMing with this creep I met on Craplist and I suck at multitasking. I just got back from my spinning class and I'm all hot and sweaty. My butt is tighter than a snare drum. I could loosen that up for you. I am sure you could. Stop bragging fatso. Darnit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rascar13 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 (edited) Red=Her - White=Me HiHi. My name's Mackenzie. How can I help? I got robbed on the street That's nice. I have a friend who gives me free rails. Is that nice? That depends. I'm not answering any questions until I know you can afford us. Depends on what? Have you ever had food poisoning after eating at Cluckin' Bell? I can get you $10 million in damages. No, I havent. Can we please get back to the case? I'm getting a very negative vibe from you. Our system has already mapped all your personal data so I'd start being nice if I were you.I often wonder if it can. I also wonder about trees You not so nice either Interesting. Now get back down to your parents' basement, loser. Do you call me loser? Idiot Dunno, god i could use a Pisswasser.Do you watch meTV? Has it turned you into an imbecile? You may be entitled to compensation. How does that have anything to do with the case? Whatever, you're boring me now. Wrong answer. If I was your boss, I would have fired you! Whatever. Listen, let's tell it like it is. What do I need to do for you to become a client?Try it. Try anything once my Dad always used to tell me. God, I hate myself. Have you ever been promoted? I don't think I have. What's with all the questions? You're worse than my therapist. Well What are you talking about? Please bear in mind that I'm on a lot of medication. What should I care about that? Whatever you like. The client is always right, so long as they earn a six-figure salary. Maby, yes. I like to be spanked. Sorry, please ignore that. I'm IMing with this creep I met on Craplist and I suck at multitasking. Cant you multitask? Can a man have no manhood? What the hell are you talking about? That's an interesting question. Have you bought any defective products recently? Go swallow something accidentally. I dont want to. Do it yourself I hope you get cancer.Let me send you a quarter and you can call someone who cares. Thats ok. Just send me a quarter if you like. I'm glad we've cleared that up. Now can I go for a cigarette?Ever been in contact with Asbestos or lead paint? We need to drum up some more victims. You will not live a good life when you're smoking Thanks for giving me information that I'll never use. I'm sure you will some time. My thighs are really tort. Sorry - a little legal joke there to lighten the mood! I dont have more time. Have a nice day. I hope you get cancer.I've never thought about it. Whatever. Bye God, you're boring. This is better than filing but only just.See you. Good luck - I thought I had issues. Edited April 14, 2008 by Rascar13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MultiForce Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 (edited) Hahaha: HelloHello. I'm Mackenzie. Welcome to Goldberg, Ligner and Shyster. Thank you Don't you want to talk about something else? I'm premenstrual. I want to f*ck you You can do whatever you want, so long as you pay. May I kiss you No you can't. This isn't some charity love-in. Show me the color of your money first. I'm in love with a prostitute... Edited April 14, 2008 by MultiForce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stupid632 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 (edited) her: i want to kill myself me: ok her:I SO should have studied fashion. I spend half my day photocopying and the other half under Mr. Shyster's desk. I hate law. i just thought that bit was funny but what was she doing under the desk of mr: Shyster makes you wonder anther one me: who you having sex with tonight. for random reasons her:Philips Van Der Philip. :-) Edited April 14, 2008 by stupid632 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RONIN1191 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 It was kinda funny til she started repeating what she said previously. Still, it was pretty cool and a decent example of marketing strategy. It'd be even cooler if they called you back (sorta like the Snakes on a Plane website where you could have your buddies called by Samuel L. Jackson- you might remember him as Frank Tenpenny in SA) with some bs line about what you owe them or whatever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamefreak1978 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Hello Hello. I'm Mackenzie. Welcome to Goldberg, Ligner and Shyster. I was wondering a friend of mine was caught in the toilets in a very inconvenient situation with 2 hamsters and a goldfish Where were you? I was intoxicated sleeping under a bridge Where were you? i have told you under a bridge So what. I have an IQ of 83. yes I think I like you. I believe that every stranger is a friend I haven't made yet, until they issue a restraining order. what about my friend and the 2 hamsters and gold fish? I don't care enough about it to have an opinion. so what you getting paid for? I SO should have studied fashion. I spend half my day photocopying and the other half under Mr. Shyster's desk. I hate law. maybe so cause you look like a tramp to me Perhaps. Are you sure you can afford this? eh? My thighs are really tort. Sorry - a little legal joke there to lighten the mood! ah thats what my friend said to the hampsters Don't you want to talk about something else? I'm premenstrual. yes do you like hamsters and goldfish? I SO should have studied fashion. I spend half my day photocopying and the other half under Mr. Shyster's desk. I hate law. so your job blows? Give me a break. This is a serious law firm. Our partners talk Latin over cappuccinos. are you or are you not going to help me with my friend who was having consenting sex with the hamsters and goldfish? I am a girl from Broker with several STDs. really my friends ok about STD's he says the hamsters were really clean I'm staring into the void and it's cold. So cold. I'm still trying to blank out all those things that happened to me on the pageant circuit. your just a stupid tart arent you Yeah right. thought so Are you an ethnic minority? There's a lot of money in discrimination. yes i am, im a dog does that help? Give me a break. This is a serious law firm. Our partners talk Latin over cappuccinos. does the word piss off mean anything to you? I can't tell. how about go f*ck yourself? How about it? Goodbye my friend just told me the goldfish isnt going to press charges God, you're boring. This is better than filing but only just. f*ck OFF UGLY TWAT! Why do you have to use the F word? Where are you from? Bohan? Silly bitch I SO should have studied fashion. I spend half my day photocopying and the other half under Mr. Shyster's desk. I hate law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stupid632 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 i have found out the creep she met on graplist or sumthing his name is....... Philips Van Der Philip. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewilliam Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 So I raped a kitten and the neighbor called the cops. what should I do? Are you an ethnic minority? There's a lot of money in discrimination.Whatever you like. The client is always right, so long as they earn a six-figure salary. no, I'm whitey I'm getting a very negative vibe from you. Our system has already mapped all your personal data so I'd start being nice if I were you. I'll show you negative Have you ever fallen in the workplace? A papercut, maybe? I banged the secretary on her desk one time and got a crick in my neck Can we change the subject to something less boring? how are you at knob-polishing? Whatever, you're boring me now. You're not much better, chola. I'm a little buzzed, I'm not going to lie. Wanna get a bite to eat and then f*ck? Wow, I just purged a Rusty Brown's donut and my breath smells like paraffin. You're gonna be purging my man-juice soon enough, slutty. I'm staring into the void and it's cold. So cold. I'm still trying to blank out all those things that happened to me on the pageant circuit. Well, when you dress like a cheap 10-year-old whore, you're gonna get raped like 10-year-old whore. You know what will help you forget about it? My schlong. Do you watch meTV? Has it turned you into an imbecile? You may be entitled to compensation.Thanks for telling me. Now shut up and let me tell you how I can make you a millionaire.I can't take much more of this. I'm teetering on the brink of a nervous breakdown. I want money. Give me money Why do you want that?Why do you want that? So I can buy heroin and tranny whores. Are you prepared to swear under oath that you found a bullet in your Bean Machine gunkaccino? We've got them by the balls. This is a cash cow that's plump for the slaughter. Your snatch is plump for slaughter, too...by my man-sword. You don't know that for a fact. You don't know much of anything as far as I can tell.Will that make you feel like less of a dork? Dork? Are you an ethnic minority? There's a lot of money in discrimination. Shut up, you c*nt. You already axed me that and I said no, I'm whitey. Now come over here and suck me off before I phone your pimp and tell him what a failure you are. Have you ever had food poisoning after eating at Cluckin' Bell? I can get you $10 million in damages. Like I've never heard that before.Right now? Yes, right now. My thighs are really tort. Sorry - a little legal joke there to lighten the mood! I'll loosen up your thighs, whore. Have you ever fallen in the workplace? A papercut, maybe? I told you already, I got a crick in my neck after banging my secretary. Oh, and I also slipped and fell on her wetness. Yeah, I remember you told me. Ease up on the attitude, loser. Go panhandle in Star Junction.Yeah that's right. I rich, bitch. I could buy ten whores like you with the change in my couch cushions Thanks for the information. Now, do you have someone you want to sue?I am sure you could. Stop bragging fatso. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aimee Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 her:I SO should have studied fashion. I spend half my day photocopying and the other half under Mr. Shyster's desk. I hate law. i just thought that bit was funny but what was she doing under the desk of mr: Shyster makes you wonder Well that's obvious. Shining his shoes, duh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GranSnake Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 This already has a topic: http://www.gtaforums.com/index.php?showtopic=325503&hl= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aimee Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 This is just a tiny bit of the conversation, something she said that intrigued me: I like to be spanked. Sorry, please ignore that. I'm IMing with this creep I met on Craplist and I suck at multitasking. Craplist, that sounds familiar. Does that mean that there'll be a Craigslist stylee ingame website...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patrickvbbh Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Me: 69? She: Don't you want to talk about something else? I'm premenstrual. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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