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Minotaur


Typhus

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In front only darkness,

Behind only string,

Too black to see,

Too quiet to sing.

The creature is lurking hereabouts

With a bulls head

That snorts and pouts.

Watching, hiding as I feel my doubts

Tear me limb by limb.

What am I doing? Where will I go?

Can I flee the son of this Cretan King?

Have you heard the tales of this beastly thing?

Seven girls and seven boys.

He eats them alive

With his bloodstained teeth, his friends, his toys.

I’m not mad,

I can feel it now,

Dripping blood upon my hand.

Everywhere a stench so foul,

Where is the rest of my merry band?

We came in whole, not that it mattered.

Before long the flock was scattered.

I thought I’d be safer alone, my first major blunder

And now this wretch will tear me asunder.

Ah, it’s all been in vain

All lives must end.

My spirit is broken, my legs are lame.

Footsteps echo around that bend.

From his body comes a vulgar heat,

An ecstasy he cannot contain,

Enthused, he begins to eat,

My guts, my eyes, my hands, my feet.

Here stands the Minotaur,

The heir of Crete.

A bloody glutton

That nothing can sate.

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saltinespike

I am in no position to criticize poetry, as all my poetic works have been light-hearted Dr. Seuss style stories, but not even stories. Basically, I can rhyme the sh*t, but I can't seem to rhyme a story.

 

To me, the whole thing doesn't flow all the way through. You seem to jump around in your rhyming, which throws everything off. And you didn't provide breaks, which isn't really a big deal. That's all the criticism I can offer really.

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