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The Dysfunktionals


Canofceleri

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You are amazing.

So I take it you enjoyed it, cool. Did you enjoy the raw sexuality of the first one or the brutal violence of the second episode?

 

Is everyone who has actually read this thing disgusted and offended or do some see it for what it is and enjoy the well structured narrative? More to come, thanks.

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You are amazing.

So I take it you enjoyed it, cool. Did you enjoy the raw sexuality of the first one or the brutal violence of the second episode?

 

Is everyone who has actually read this thing disgusted and offended or do some see it for what it is and enjoy the well structured narrative?

I loved it all. Best story ever since Michael Hamburger.

kdr9l4.png

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Pretentious criticism starts now:

 

Your writing (if you can call it that, I see it more of a literal manifestation of your own mental confusion and deprivation) is quite frankly an abomination of the written word and lacks any literary merit. Your use of provocative one-liners, crude descriptions and shallow dialogues amounts to nothing more than a premature attempt to disgust the reader without regard to any higher meaning or understanding; the words lead no where and mean nothing.

 

If you were going for this, good job, but verbal vomit like this is not what I consider writing. You have a good mind, use it. whatsthat.gif

 

Edit: I guess I expected better from the person who posted this topic.

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I can't get enough of these types of fics. I got no clue what the hell the intention behind them is but they sure make me laugh. You people should explore this side of your mind more often!

 

On a more depressive note, in regards to sickness and depravation, it looks like I have serious competition. Damnit! cookie.gif

 

Very much looking forward to the 3rd chapter! There is gonna be more, right?

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Pretentious criticism starts now:

 

Your writing (if you can call it that, I see it more of a literal manifestation of your own mental confusion and deprivation) is quite frankly an abomination of the written word and lacks any literary merit. Your use of provocative one-liners, crude descriptions and shallow dialogues amounts to nothing more than a premature attempt to disgust the reader without regard to any higher meaning or understanding; the words lead no where and mean nothing.

 

If you were going for this, good job, but verbal vomit like this is not what I consider writing. You have a good mind, use it. whatsthat.gif

 

Edit: I guess I expected better from the person who posted this topic.

Oh, bah! Get your head out your ass. Do you actually think that I'm going for the Nobel Prize? Look around this writing forum, do you see anything but a million sh*tty GTA 6 THE NEXT CLAUDE?

 

And by the way, linking to that post doesn't do anything for me. I can be a pretty sharp character, I'm a pretty intelligent guy when it comes down to it, but that doesn't matter. There are times when I lay down and read and think deeply about serious matters, but there are also times when I stand in front of the mirror and act retarded. This story falls under the latter character,

 

It is verbal vomit... it's absurd... I'm sorry it doesn't entertain you.

 

And oxidizer... there will be more. Muwahaha!

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do you see anything but a million sh*tty GTA 6 THE NEXT CLAUDE?

Yes, actually. Most stories are fanfics, but what pisses me off is people who act like the only things here are fanfics.

 

Candarelli, I respect you, and I love your poems, but those of us who try to do original, non-fanfic stories really get pissed off when the only people who get acknowledged are the people posting stories like.. well, "GTA 6 THE NEXT CLAUDE".

 

By the way, I read half of the first chapter, and couldn't read anymore. Its a little too graphic for my taste. I don't think its a bad story though, in fact, its pretty good. Its just not my usual type of literature.

Slosten.gif

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do you see anything but a million sh*tty GTA 6 THE NEXT CLAUDE?

Yes, actually. Most stories are fanfics, but what pisses me off is people who act like the only things here are fanfics.

 

Candarelli, I respect you, and I love your poems, but those of us who try to do original, non-fanfic stories really get pissed off when the only people who get acknowledged are the people posting stories like.. well, "GTA 6 THE NEXT CLAUDE".

 

By the way, I read half of the first chapter, and couldn't read anymore. Its a little too graphic for my taste. I don't think its a bad story though, in fact, its pretty good. Its just not my usual type of literature.

No you're absolutely right. It was blanket statement exaggerated to prove a point. There are some people on here who churn out original stuff, which is great... there is a majority of the other stuff though.

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2 Girls, 3 Guys, A Dead Baby, 1 Cup

A Dysfunktional Quickie

 

 

"Heh... hehheh.. hehehe-- hahaha!"

 

"Paul! What the f*ck is so funny?!"

 

"Yeah, I'm trying to get off here, dad," Spunk Rag zipped, "stop distracting mom so she can get back to work!"

 

"No, no, this sh*t is funny, guys. Come check it out."

 

"What could possibly be so funny when I'm trying to eat our daughter out?"

 

"Apparently there's this video on the internet that's so gross it's making everyone throw up! There are reaction videos all over YouTube, you gotta check this out!" Meredith and Spunk Rag quickly gathered around the computer to see what all the fuss was about.

 

"Oh man," Spunk Rag started, "I wanna see this! I love getting grossed out!"

 

"I can't seem to find it, it's all reaction vids," informed Paul.

 

"Well, what's the video they're watching called?" asked Meredith.

 

"2 Girls 1 Cup," Paul answered.

 

"Oooh! Now I really wanna see it!" Spunky exclaimed as she tried to maintain arousal by rubbing her 11 year old clit.

 

"Just try typing the name in with a dot com," reasoned Meredith. It worked. They all watched in silence as the video started.

 

"Nice music," Paul stated. "MM, boobies."

 

"Ah, they're just lesbi-- oooh," Meredith stopped in her tracks as the name of the video suddenly became understood. By the end of the video they were all still in silence.

 

"Well, that wasn't gross at all, that was just hot. Damn, now I really wanna get f*cked, ma."

 

"Quick! Get the camera!" cried Meredith.

 

"Why? You didn't finish me off yet."

 

"Guys, we can really do this. I've always wanted to be famous, ever since I was a little girl... but my parents were always so old fashioned and put me down for my ambitions. But now I've got a real shot! If those two girls are all over the internet just because of that! sh*t, we'll make the papers with what we're about to do!"

 

"And what might that be?" asked Spunky.

 

"All I need is a really big cup... um, World's Most Potent Laxative-- we have some in the fridge, and that's it. Oh yeah, and the baby-- the dead one." All the supplies were quickly gathered by Paul. They all stripped naked, drank the laxative, and started the camcorder.

 

It all started out innocently enough, Paul was jerking off to porn in the background while Meredith and daughter Spunk Rag 69ed. Then suddenly Meredith began to squirt sh*t all over the floor above Spunky's head and on her hair a little too. "Quick, get me the cup!"

 

Johnny and baby Gabriel then entered the house. "What are you two doing?" Johnny asked, excited.

 

"Ohhhh yeah! I'm just sh*tting in a cup, son! Take off your clothes and join us!" Meredith moaned. Johnny dropped the baby, not hesitating a second. Johnny quickly stripped off his clothes and dipped his erect cock in the cup of sh*t and inserted it in his mother's asshole while she ate her daughter out.

 

"Quick, hand me the cup, Johnny"..."Okay, now take some of that sh*t and smear it on my mouth so I can really eat your sister out!"...."mmm... yeah."

 

"REFILL!" Spunky yelled as she snatched the cup and sprayed everywhere, only getting half of the excrement in the cup (the rest all over the bodies of her mother and brother and also on the walls and carpet. "Oh yeah! I'm about to spout all this sh*tty cum all in your mouth mom! OH YEAH! I'M CUMMING! I'M CUMMING! I'M CUMMING SO F*CKING HARD!"

 

"MMM!" sounded Meredith as she smiled for the camera, revealing a nice set of teeth adorned with sh*t and female ejaculate.

 

"Oh man! You guys hogged all the sh*t!" Paul cried.

 

"You're not even f*cking, Paul! Just shut the f*ck up and jerk off some more, you pathetic freak!" scolded Spunk Rag and Johnny in unison.

 

"I wanted to at least jack off with some sh*t.."

 

"I knew this dead baby would be good for something," Meredith said as she tossed the lifeless infant to him, "here, if you can crack it open it's yours." Meredith quickly went back to the scene, she squatted over Spunk Rag (still lying on her back cumming, mind you) and a long flow of diarreah made its way into her daughter's mouth and on her face. She lowered herself further and began to be ate out by Spunky who tried her damndest to push just a little sh*t into her mother's puss so that when she got her mom off it would be the much tastier. Johnny went in for a second dip and forced his large dick inside his sister's sh*tty tw*t.

 

Meanwhile, Paul attempted to extract sh*t from the dead baby. He tore the infant's lower jaw completely off with his bare hands and stuck his arm down its throat to reach deep down and pull some out... but to no avail, he could only manage a lung. In a fit of frustration he grabbed the dead baby by the back of its neck and bashed it into the wall repeatedly. But acting out never helped anyone. Finally he figured it out. He dashed to the kitchen table and set the dead baby down on its face hard. With a rusty screwdriver, he started at the baby's lower back. CRUNCH! He stabbed the baby with that screwdriver seven more times, each time a bit lower than the last. Finally, he ended up at the baby's asshole. He pryed the baby open with brute force and dumped what fell out on the floor. After digging through the insides he finally found the sh*t he was looking for.

 

Paul reentered the living room, stroking his now sh*tty dick, to find all of his family wallowing in feces. "It looks like a Pollack!" he exclaimed. "Where's baby Gabriel?" he ran to the front door and picked up Gabe and set him on top of a pile of sh*t by the rest of the now exhausted family.

 

After throwing some sh*t on Gabe, he proclaimed, "AH YEAH! I'M ABOUT TO CUM AND IT'S NOT EVEN PORN! IT'S NOT EVEN PORN, IT'S THE REAL THING! OOOOHHHHHHH!" and with that he shot cum all over baby Gabriel's face. The baby started to immediately cum an abnormal amount of jizm that ran from all sides of his diaper and flooded the floor, forming a modest pool.

 

Excited, they quickly uploaded the video to the internet and anxiously waited for reactions to their shocking family orgy. But the reactions never came, at least not like they did.

 

 

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I love it, this is right up my alley. The graphic suggestion, the narrative drive, everything. Don't stop writing this, I'm getting boners reading the thing. ph34r.gif

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I love it, this is right up my alley. The graphic suggestion, the narrative drive, everything. Don't stop writing this, I'm getting boners reading the thing. ph34r.gif

Getting a boner might not be the exact reaction I was going for... but, hell, whatever floats your boat, dude! biggrin.gif

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I love it, this is right up my alley. The graphic suggestion, the narrative drive, everything. Don't stop writing this, I'm getting boners reading the thing. ph34r.gif

Getting a boner might not be the exact reaction I was going for... but, hell, whatever floats your boat, dude! biggrin.gif

The fact that it's written in a dog's perspective makes it so much more fun to read.

kdr9l4.png

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I do agree with reemah here. It is just overflowing with extreme, what do you call it, sexual terms and references. I have no idea what to say. I had a very hard time reading it.

 

But I must consider one thing. Unlike some people, this isn't my "alleyway." The way I write and produce stories are in a totally different universe than what this piece is. So, if I know nothing about this type of style, what gives me the priviledge to knock you down?

 

So, in other words, keep doing what you're doing. The whole point of writing is expressing your own style with other people of similar tastes. So as long as your targeted audienced is satisfied, some more than others, I have no problem.

 

I just cannot guarantee I will visit again though... confused.gif

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Spunk Rag gets shot during a hold-up and is sent into a deep coma. With family drama erupting around her, the narrative weaves in and out of real time and the dreamstate of her inner-consciousness. When, and if, she awakes will she be the same incestuous, homocidal eleven year-old prostitute we've all grown to know and love? Find out in the next shockingly mesmerizing (shocking that you're mesmerized by it) episode of The Dysfunktionals!

 

And, yes, it is a direct rip-off of a plot from The Sopranos.

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"Hell, that's some act you have there. What do you call it?"

 

"The Aristocrats!"

 

Sorry Cand, I couldn't resist. smile.gif

vbSWr1A.gif


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"Hell, that's some act you have there. What do you call it?"

 

"The Aristocrats!"

 

Sorry Cand, I couldn't resist. smile.gif

biggrin.gif Y'know... I've seen that movie and me and my friends even did our own versions when it first came out. It didn't occur to me though when I started writing this... I sent it to my friend and the next time he saw it he referred to it as that "Aristrocrats story".

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You do know there are some kids on this forum... right?

I'm 11 years old, man.

 

The sexual things disturbed me, but violent parts I liked biggrin.gif

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You do know there are some kids on this forum... right?

I'm 11 years old, man.

 

The sexual things disturbed me, but violent parts I liked  biggrin.gif

Them big red letters in the first post are supposed to put kiddies off. You were the one who read it.

 

Anyway I read the first chapter. Its good to read something like this every now and then that you can laugh at.

Edited by Ryunday
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I can't wait for more of this. It's so shocking I can't stop reading.

 

And the boner quip? That was a joke, don't worry. wink.gif

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I can't wait for more of this. It's so shocking I can't stop reading.

 

And the boner quip? That was a joke, don't worry. wink.gif

I'm about halfway done with the next episode ("The Fleshy Part of the Cunt"). It should be out in a week, I've been busy not working on it. And if I can get a partner I'd like to turn it into an animated series for the internets.

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